Toxic Secrets (2 page)

Kendra was so relentless that she worried the piss out of me until I finally peeked over the ledge, waving my little white flag. She had a touch of only-child syndrome. I was an only-child too, but I wasn’t a rich, spoiled only-child. I glanced over at her, and she looked at me with sad puppy dog eyes, begging and pleading with her hands folded in a praying gesture.

“Kendra, you know I’m not ready for that right now. I just want to make new friends and have the whole high school experience before I graduate. I know I’m a little late for that party, but I still have half the school year left.”

“I get that, but, damn, Courtney, it’s just one night,” she scolded. “I’m not fighting with you over something so petty.”

“Then don’t.” I jerked my stuff up and drudged out of the car, huffing my way through the parking lot, when I was nearly knocked off balance.

Kendra linked her arm around mine. “You know I never give up,” she whispered in my ear, followed with a quick kiss to my cheek.

Without giving me a chance to protest, she took off, skipping between the cars and laughing out loud to herself before I could get a word out of my mouth.

The corners of my lips tugged into a small smile. My frustration with her never lasted more than a few minutes, and I knew at that moment I had been defeated.

I was standing at my locker, fiddling with the combination on my lock when I heard that familiar, silky voice behind me. “Enjoy your Thanksgiving? It wasn’t the same this year with you not being there.”

His close proximity sent an unwanted shiver through my body, but I didn’t bother turning around as I removed books from my locker. “Leave the past where it is. What do you want, Phillip?” I snapped through gritted teeth.

“I was just asking about your Thanksgiving. Why do you assume I want something?” he said, trapping me in with both hands planted on each side of my locker. “And I can’t leave you in the past when you’re currently always in my present.” His smile was sickening and flirty. He knew my weak points and he was using them against me. He knew how I bent to his sexual manner.

Wanting him to know he didn’t intimidate me anymore, and that I wasn’t his to control, I turned around to face him.
Don’t show weakness.

“Oh I don’t know, maybe because you’ve not spoken to me since I taped pictures of you with your whores all over your car,” I pointed out with confidence.

A corner of his lip turned up into a slight smile, but anger pierced from his dark brown eyes.

Oh crap!
That might not have been the wisest thing to say. I had no one around as my witness if Phillip decided to retaliate to my comment. I flexed the muscles in my arms as I anticipated the pinch he liked to give when he tried to hurt me discreetly.

He leaned down so close to me that our noses nearly touched, then he softly said, “Did I ever tell you how hot you look when you put on the gangster act?”

Holy hell balls!

I couldn’t speak. My tongue suddenly felt as if it had absorbed every drop of moisture in my mouth. I tried swallowing, but it was bone dry.

Laughing nervously, I replied. “Phillip, I don’t know what games you’re playing with me, but I don’t have time for them, and you’re going to make me late for class.” I swiftly ducked down and slipped under his arm escaping his entrapment.

Suddenly, I stopped mid-step when I felt my hoodie being tugged from behind. My heart started pounding in my chest when I glanced over my shoulder at Phillip. “Just so you know, I’m not playing games, Jeanette,” he said firmly.

Heat rose from my neck up into my cheeks. I lowered my eyes and glared at him. He knew how much I hated that nickname.
Remain calm, Court, he’s just trying to piss you off,
I told myself.

He let out a boisterous laugh. “See ya later in class,” he called out cheerfully as he walked the opposite direction down the hall.
Pompous ass.

Just like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Phillip could always flip his personality on a whim.

I was barely able to slip through the door before Mr. Whitmore closed in on me.

As I rushed past him, I mumbled, “Sorry, emergency,” before making a mad dash to my desk. I loathed the idea of being the last person in class because everybody always stared at the person walking in late. Some people loved drawing attention to themselves, but I was not one of them. I preferred sitting in a corner or in the back where no one could see me.

I was positive my face still looked flushed. Kendra gave me her
what-the-hell
look as I sat down in front of her. I exchanged a crazy look back to her with my eyes bugging out of my head.

As I slid into my chair, trying to catch my breath, I felt my phone buzz.

K: What happened? r u ok?

Hiding my phone under my desk, I quickly put it on silent.

Me: Got caught up by Phillip. I’ll tell u later.

K: OMG!!! I can’t wait till later.

Kendra was so impatient. If I didn’t end this now, we’d be texting back and forth throughout class, and I didn’t need any more attention drawn to myself by getting busted by Mr. Whitmore.

Discreetly, I held my phone up for Kendra to see me turn it off. Problem fixed.

Kendra huffed and puffed and tapped her pencil incessantly throughout class, just loud enough for my ears. I could tell she was chomping at the bit to find out what just took place with Phillip. I glanced back at her a few times to mouth
Stop!
But she ignored me every time.

Phillip and I had been dating since the middle of our freshmen year. At that time, we attended separate schools and the night we met our teams were playing against each other. Prior to that night, I had no clue as to who Phillip was, before the night ended, I knew him on a kissing level. He charmed me with his smooth, manipulating ways and I fell head over heels for him.

After ending our long term relationship and only being single for a month, I had no desire to go on any dates any time soon. I was more concerned with building friendships than dating. Phillip had a way of manipulating people and he ruined my reputation with everyone in school. I was on a mission though, to persuade everyone that I had been the victim in our relationship, not him.

Mr. Whitmore’s words sounded like a low hum in my ears throughout class. My mind was busy replaying the strange encounter I had earlier, and, by the time first period ended, I was geared up for the entire day to be over. I wasn’t ready to face Phillip in my next class.

As soon as the bell rang, I twisted around in my chair to give Kendra the run-down of the little episode that unfolded this morning by my locker.

“That prick just wants a piece of your ass for Christmas, Courtney,” she said knowingly. “You have always been that easy piece for him, and he thinks, if he throws a little charm bone your way, you will come back begging like a sick puppy. Stay away from him, and I mean it!” she demanded, giving me a firm glare, but I could see the concern in her eyes, too.

Sometimes I thought Kendra knew me better than I knew myself.

Phillip could charm the pants right off of a nun if they wore them, and I was no better to keep mine on around him.

She was right, though. I had to stay away from him, but avoiding him in class every day until Christmas break was going to be pretty impossible.

After our break-up, I spoke with the guidance counselor and had my schedule for second semester switched around so I wouldn’t have any classes with Phillip for the remainder of the year, but I still had to get through this semester first.

My chest began constricting as thoughts of my next class started creeping in. I had finally got myself to the point of not dreading that class anymore, but, with the psychotic animal having reemerged inside Phillip, those nerves were now back on high alert.

How was I going to make it through the next three weeks? By us avoiding each other and giving the silent treatment this past month was a godsend, but now, I had a tingly feeling that was all about to change within the next hour.

After I gave Kendra the scoop on my run-in with Phillip, I was almost late for class once again. Stepping into the classroom, I came to an abrupt halt. Phillip was sitting in the desk behind mine with a smug grin plastered on his face.

Gah! Could this morning get any worse?

After our break-up, he convinced one of the girls in class to switch seats with him, but, from the looks of it now, he’d convinced her to switch back. I flashed my eyes at her, but all she gave me was a shrug of the shoulders mouthing
Sorry!
I was sure Phillip had thrown his smooth charm on her, prompting her to give up her seat without him even having to ask. I hated how people at this school thought he was some sort of God. If only they knew he was a spawn of the devil.

Rushing to my desk, I made sure I didn’t make any eye contact with him. I could feel him staring right through me, right along with everyone else in class, but I resolutely ignored his presence.

As soon as I got situated in my seat, his warm breath blew across my ear. “You coming to my game tomorrow night?”

I kept my head straight watching Mrs. York as she turned on the smart board.
Don’t speak, keep eyes square.

His fingers lightly brushed my skin as he swept my hair away from my neck. “You can’t ignore me forever, Courtney.” His touch sent chill bumps up my arm.

“I see you still feel something for me… I see the goose bumps on your soft skin. Are your boobs  aching for me to touch them?” Everyone sitting around us started smirking and giggling. The heat rapidly rose in my face, and I’m sure it flushed bright red.

Quickly, I whipped around in my seat to face him and slammed my hand down on his desk, invading his personal space. I was a little closer to the asshole than I intended, but I wanted him to hear me clearly. “Go. To. Hell. Phillip!”

He looked at me blank-faced. “I take that as a no,” he chuckled, stretching his arms back, folding them behind his head. He reclined back in his seat and stretched his long legs out, resting them past both sides of my desk. It felt like he was trying to trap me in.

Ignoring the heavy laughter from my peers, I whipped my head back around and raised my hand to get Mrs. York’s attention.

“Courtney,” Mrs. York said questioningly.

“Is it possible that I could be moved to another seat, like across the room? I’m having a hard time concentrating on my assignments,” I glanced behind me making eye contact with Phillip.

“Well, I don’t think it should be a problem. I think a new seating arrangement would be a good change for everybody.” Mrs. York smiled and gave me a quick wink. The rest of the class gave a disgruntled moan.
Kill me now.
It wasn’t exactly the response I was looking for. I knew Mrs. York was aware of the situation with Phillip and me and that she thought moving everyone would appease me, but, in all reality, she just gave Phillip’s posse one more reason to despise me. I didn’t think I’d ever fit in with the kids here at this school. At least not as long as Phillip was here to influence them.

“Tomorrow when you come to my class, I want everyone to sit alphabetically according to last name,” she announced, walking in between desks. She held up her finger to stop the next set of groans. “I know it seems childish to hand out assigned seats to juniors and seniors, but I find some of the behavior in here very immature. Don’t think that, just because I don’t say anything, it means I don’t notice what goes on in my classroom.”

Without missing a beat Mrs. York walked back to the smart board and continued explaining today’s assignment.

After feeling the loathing stares from my classmates for the duration of the class, I gave a silent prayer of thanks when the bell rang.

With my book bag in hand, I prepared to make a mad dash out the door, but stopped when Phillip grabbed my arm. I looked at him with an amiable smile. He kept a tight hold on my arm, his fingers digging into the tender skin by my armpit. “Getting yourself moved isn’t going to deter me, Courtney. You know how I love a challenge, so you better just wipe that smug grin off your face,” he warned me in a low voice, staring at me intensely.

My grin faltered as I realized I just turned this into a game for him, and Phillip wasn’t one to lose so gracefully.

Phillip side-stepped me, and gave me his signature wink. “Let the games begin!” I heard him bellow in his sing-song baritone voice as he walked into the hallway.

Chapter 2 ~ Compromise

It was ridiculous of me to try and cram everything imaginable into my book bag just to avoid visiting my locker for the remainder of the day. Knowing Phillip, though, he would be hovering around like a vulture, waiting to swoop in on me after our little incident. I jetted to my locker, emptying it of everything I could get my hands on, and sent Kendra a text telling her I would meet her at her car just as the last bell of the day rang.

Lugging my big ass book bag around was killing me. My shoulders and back were in dire need of my mother’s magic fingers. I always told her she missed her calling as a masseuse.