Authors: Melissa Haag
I interrupted him. The story sounded a lot like a fairy
tale I once read. “Wait… he called on you? What does that mean? Did he know
you?” It shook Beatriz’s head. “Then how did he call on you?”
“Let’s save that for another time. We’re running out of
time.”
I looked around, noted the emptying cafeteria, and nodded.
It gazed thoughtfully at me, which made me wary, and then
continued its story. “He asked for money. Just enough to secure a future for
Belinda.” At my puzzled look, it explained before I could interrupt again. “I
can make deals. Pacts. I have the power to grant requests, but there’s always
a price. The price was Belinda.”
My mouth popped open. No wonder she’d been hiding. But why
leave a book saying we needed to hide too if she was the price?
“I wanted a companion. Someone to talk to. In my mind, I
could provide her with security no human could. I had little exposure to
humans and didn’t fully understand… well, I didn’t understand much, but I did
want a companion who would come to me by choice.
“We struck a deal. I could spend time with Belinda to
present myself to her as a choice. Because I’m not very patient, I set a limit
to the amount of time she had to decide. By her seventeenth birthday. In the
event that she didn’t choose me, I added a clause allowing me to present myself
to any of her line under the same conditions until someone does choose me.”
The bell rang startling me. I looked around. The cleaning
crew began making their way along the tables. Voices from the steady stream of
students in the hallway drifted in. When I looked back, Beatriz stood and
grabbed her tray.
“Tomorrow.”
After that word, it left. And I still didn’t know what it
was. Could I trust what it said? It seemed to fit. It explained why Belinda
left the book. She’d made her choice and left the rest of us to suffer the
consequence.
* * * *
After school, I headed to the library to do some research.
When I started looking up possession, everything pointed to demonic with a few
references to mental illness. I ruled out mental illness right away. No way
could so many people fall victim of spontaneous temporary mental illness. It
would be too much of a coincidence. A thought occurred to me. What if they
weren’t the ill ones? The common factor in all of the occurrences was me. I’d
remained the only one to see it. And for all of the people it’s possessed, I’d
been the only one to hear it. My ability to glimpse my future, coupled with
the sleep thing, wasn’t normal. Growing up I’d been told repeatedly to keep
that part of who I was to myself. What if they just wanted to protect me from
myself and this was all in my head?
Deep in thought, I left the library and started the
seven-block walk home. The overcast sky matched my troubled mood. Just in
case my psyche wasn’t the issue, I needed to categorize the questions I had and
decide which was the most important. I would ask the most important first
tomorrow.
I really wanted a better explanation of what it was. That,
although finding out what it wanted, should come first. But after our talk
today, I didn’t think I needed further clarification regarding what it wanted.
It wanted to present itself to me as a choice. Maybe I needed to know what,
exactly, that meant.
Nodding to myself, I set the first question to memory. But
that brought me back to who it was. Was it a he? A she? Did it even have a
gender? What was its name? The questions started piling up. Taking a deep
breath, I cleared my mind and started again. What is your name and what does it
mean to choose you? Good.
As I neared the house, I slowed down circling back to my
original thought. Could I trust anything it said? I debated again about
telling at least Gran. If what it said were the truth, she’d be interested to
know about our history. But how could I tell truth from lie? The only person
to verify it died almost two hundred years ago. All I had to go on was its
word, which might even be a figment of my deranged mind. Alright. Keeping it
to myself.
Red nosed and weary, I pushed open the front door and called
out a less than chipper greeting. Gran responded from the back of the house.
“I was wondering where you were. Did you run into
trouble?” She moved toward the kitchen with a concerned expression looking me
over for any new marks of trauma. They were well hidden… in my mind.
“I was doing some research at the library. Mom’s right.
Living in town is kind of nice.” Making an effort to sound happy, I peeled off
my jacket, hat, and mittens. She stepped aside as I put them away and moved to
help her with dinner.
“As long as you’re safe, that’s all that really matters.”
She grinned at me impishly and then added, “You’re mom was right about town. I
do like having neighbors again.”
Moving to the stove, she started browning some ground meat.
While we put together the fixings for tacos, she told me about the widower two
houses down who’d stopped by to offer his help when it snowed.
“I assured him that with all of us girls working, we’d be
fine on our own, but he insisted. He had one of those machines to clear away
the snow. Said he’d be happy to do it in exchange for some cocoa.”
I looked up at Gran in astonishment as something clicked
into place. We needed to choose before seventeen. We lost our gift, but no
longer needed to hide until our daughters turned twelve. Oh, and our husbands
were short lived. Why, then, hadn’t anyone ever re-married? Based on our
conversation, Gran was still interested.
Before I could open my mouth to ask her, the door opened and
mom and Aunt Grace got home. It wasn’t a topic I wanted to bring up in front
of everyone. So I kept quiet.
The next day, I waited for the lunch hour with a sense of
expectation, the question repeating in my mind. What is your name and what
does it mean for me to choose you? I still wasn’t decided if I would believe
what it said.
This time it took me by surprise in the lunch line. “I like
how you dress.”
I turned and saw Beatriz standing just behind me. Since I’d
been looking around watching for it, I had no idea how it had managed to sneak
up on me.
The boy who’d been behind me eyed Beatriz oddly. Could he
hear it? I wanted to run the first time I heard it, so I didn’t think that was
it. Then I realized how the thing’s statement must have sounded. Having a
rumor that I was a lesbian floating around school would be a new one for me.
Since it stood awkwardly to the side, I handed it a tray and
motioned for her to step in line. The boy behind us didn’t say a word, but
watched us closely.
Moving with the line, I watched it out of the corner of my
eye. It did everything I did. Asked for what I asked for, studied me. It
watched closely how I interacted with people. If it wanted to learn social
skills, I’d have to let it know I’d be a bad choice for a teacher.
“I dress like everyone else,” I commented as we waited for
the register.
“No. You don’t.” I turned back to look at it
questioningly. “You dress for yourself. They dress for everyone else.”
I paid and, for the first time, really noticed what I wore
and compared to everyone around me. Sure, I wore the same worn and holey style
of jean. It was easy to do when you were poor. But I skipped the cute little
flats or the high heels that some wore. I owned sneakers. One pair. That’s
what I wore. My mom and I wore the same size, so we swapped around our closets
to keep a bigger selection. She didn’t work anywhere with a dress code so
cumulatively we owned tee’s, long and short sleeve and a few sweaters.
Mostly, I layered the tee’s and wore a hoodie when it got too
cold. I didn’t wear makeup. I didn’t have enough time in the morning. Nor
did I put on any type of jewelry. Even the cheap stuff felt like a waste of
money. After taking inventory, I felt decidedly inferior.
Leading the way to table, I set down my tray and sat
stiffly. “They have money. I don’t.” The cafeteria filled quickly.
It quietly watched me take a bite. “You’re upset. Why?”
“You just told me I dress like a…” I was at a loss for the
word and then thought of one Gran used. “A schlup.”
It canted its head for a moment. Beatriz’s brown eyes
remained focused on my face as if it gleaned information from me that way. “Is
that a word?”
“It is in my house,” I mumbled looking down and taking
another bite. It took me a moment to taste what I’d forked in. Alfredo.
Glancing at my tray, I grabbed a bread stick and dipped it in the sauce. Could
anything really be wrong on Alfredo day?
“I think you misunderstood me. I like how you dress. I
wasn’t hinting at anything with my words.”
I glanced up, but couldn’t read anything in Beatriz’s expression.
“Fine. Let’s just forget it.” Was I really getting moody with an unknown creature
sitting inside another person’s body? My questions. I needed to focus. “What
is your name and what does it mean to choose you?”
A choking noise to my right distracted me. The boy who’d
been behind us in line sat a few seats away. Although he sat partially turned
away from us, he’d obvious been listening. I narrowed my gaze thinking about
what we’d said and then rolled my eyes. Yep, by tomorrow, I’d be a confirmed
lesbian. That’d put a damper on meeting new boys.
“Morik. It means time with me. As I said, I’ve been alone
too long…”
I held up my hand when the boy made another sniggering noise
and pointedly darted my eyes toward our eavesdropper. It followed my gaze. In
an instant, it left Beatriz and entered the boy. I felt horrible and didn’t
know what to do. Would he hurt him? What could I say to prevent it? Call him
back maybe?
The boy picked up his tray and stood.
“Tess, I don’t feel good,” Beatriz said quietly across from
me.
Forcing my gaze away from the boy, I noted Beatriz’s pale
completion. I’d completely forgotten about her. She looked more scared than
sick though.
“I don’t remember how I got here.” Her voice warbled with
barely suppressed tears.
“Oh, honey, we walked together.” My pitying look wasn’t
fake. I hated lying, but the truth was worse.
Before I could say more, it returned. Beatriz’s expression
of confusion and fear faded into the calm mask of someone possessed by that
thing. Morik.
I looked around and spotted the boy sitting further away
looking puzzled.
“You need to stop doing this,” I whispered focusing on it
again. It looked away from me to the boy it’d placed across the cafeteria who now
looked back at us in confusion. “All the people you keep popping into are
going to think they’re crazy.
“I am willing to spend time with you in my true form, but
think you are not ready.”
The image of its glowing green eyes crossed my mind. Morik
was right. I wasn’t ready and didn’t think I ever would be. Obviously, now
that it found me, it wanted to be around me until I made my choice. For now,
it would be in other people’s bodies… I shivered thinking of later. Is that
why Belinda chose a boy? To get rid of it? No wonder she said to hide. My
mind paused. How did it find me in the first place? Was it really because it
was dusk? I opened my mouth to ask, but it interrupted me.
“We will talk more later.” Then, Morik was gone.
Frustrated, I sighed before realizing Beatriz was back and
in need of comfort. “You’re not going crazy… I can see that’s what you’re
thinking, so stop. You probably had a lot on your mind when we walked here.
It’s not like we were talking. I’ve walked myself to the kitchen hundreds of
times and then wondered how I got there.”
She seemed a little better and started eating her untouched
lunch. I dug into my own. These quick conversations with Morik weren’t
answering my questions, but did hint at one thing. He didn’t want to harm me.
I needed more time with him get the information I wanted in full detail. Maybe
that was his plan. Tease me with information so I’d willing spend time with
him.
Barely suppressing a sigh, I also realized, if I wanted to
spend the time with him to get my answer, I needed a host for him. Beatriz was
out. So was talking during school. After school then. With who? I looked
around. The boy who’d been watching us still sat where Morik had left him.
Not him either. Too many weird things, related back to me, happening to one
person would fuel the gossip fire. That boy already had enough fire. I needed
someone outside of school.
For the rest of the day, I concentrated on my problem but
found no solution. Everyone I knew, I liked so far. I didn’t want him messing
with their heads. That meant facing him, the real him, if I wanted more of an
explanation without jeopardizing someone else’s mental stability.
The next morning I popped out of bed with real enthusiasm.
My first day of my first job.
Mom snapped a picture of me before I left the house and made
me promise to let her take an ‘after’… picture. She had a small book of event
pictures she made for me and wanted my first day’s ‘before’ and ‘after’
pictures in there. I didn’t know why she needed two. It wasn’t as if I’d be
changing clothes at work.
Wearing a nicer pair of jeans and an old video game tee
shirt, I’d pulled my hair back into a ponytail. A few of the shorter strands
of hair around my face refused to comply so I left them alone hanging in a
light wave. Mom said it looked cute, I thought it made me look slightly
deranged.
Still snow free, I wore my sneakers to work. By the time I
got there, five minutes to spare, the tips of my fingers stung with cold and I
couldn’t wait for a cup of coffee. Through the window, I noted more occupied
tables than empty ones. Pushing open the door, I breathed in the welcoming
scent of roasted coffee and moved toward Mona. She greeted me with a smile
from behind the counter.