Torn (11 page)

Honey Wine’s hips thrust against his hand until she throbbed against it. He continued caressing her sensitive nub and moist folds of flesh until her passion ebbed and she relaxed completely. He took her hand and placed it over his chest, holding it here so she felt the steady rhythm of his heartbeat against her palm.

For the first time since she was a child, she slept without worry.

* * * * *

Honey Wine awoke warm, content, and encompassed by Torn’s scent. She smiled, remembering the hours she’d spent in his arms, but when she reached for him, the bed beside her was empty. Disappointment overwhelmed her.

She sat up, wiping sleep from her eyes, and glanced at the fire burning in the hearth. A tub full of water stood in front of it, clothes folded neatly on a plain wooden stool nearby.

Stretching, she slipped out of the bed and into the tub. The warm water soothed her body, still sore from the previous day’s journey. She smiled wryly.

There had been a time when such a hike would have been routine for her. Now that she was out of the dungeon, she’d have to sharpen the skills, which had lain dormant. She washed her hair and skin with the scented soap and braided her damp tresses down her back. She slipped into a green wool tunic and pulled on a brown skirt. There was no mirror in the chamber, and she wondered how she looked. Funny, before meeting Torn, she’d never thought of such things, but she wanted him to find her attractive.

She walked down the corridor and into the great hall. Several black-garbed Knights as well as women and children lined the wooden tables. Rain waved to her from where he sat with two other Knights, one blond, and the other flame-haired. She approached, feeling slightly out of place, but the men stood and greeted her with friendly smiles, and soon she was seated beside Rain enjoying a breakfast of bread and fresh fruit.

“Did you sleep well, Lady?” Rain’s eyes glistened with good humor as he popped a fat, red berry into his mouth.

Honey Wine nodded, realizing that the blond and the redhead were staring at her in a manner that might have been offensive had their expressions not been so amiable.

“So you’re from Sophianna?” the redhead asked in the clipped accent of the western lands where Honey Wine had once traveled with Alva.

“I am.”

“Torn speaks highly of you,” the blond said.

“Tell these rogues to mind their own business.” Rain chuckled. “They don’t even have the decency to introduce themselves before questioning a lady.”

“Excuse us.” The redhead reached for an apple and took a juicy bite. He tapped his chest with the fruit and said, “I’m Mage, and this here is Warrant.”

“Charmed.” Warrant took her hand and bowed his curly blond head over it.

He winked one of his turquoise eyes at her. “And I must say you’re even more beautiful than Rain described.”

“A lovely compliment,” she cast him a teasing smile, “from one so handsome.”

Warrant released her hand and grinned. “I see Torn has found himself a formidable woman. I’m not at all surprised.”

“Me either.” Mage finished the last of his apple, tossed the core on his plate, and reached for a thick slice of bread. “He’s waited long enough to find one.”

Honey Wine lifted an eyebrow. “Find one?”

“Yes.” Mage paused in his chewing. “Torn is careful with everything. He thinks things through. All his words and actions are means to a well -planned end. He doesn’t waste time with –”

Rain interrupted him with a long, chastising whistle. “Risky, Mage. You know how Torn dislikes gossip.”

Mage gave a snort of laughter. “You worry about him. I’m out of his faction and in charge of the home guard now.”

“What faction is Torn in charge of?” Honey Wine asked. The more she heard clips of the Knights’ conversation, the more curious she was becoming about Torn’s position in the Order. He was obviously high up and well respected.

Mage’s green eyes met Honey Wine’s and he shook his head, his smile fading. “I’m sorry, Honey Wine, but we’re not at liberty to discuss Torn’s faction.”

“Go on, make her more curious, why don’t you?” Warrant leaned back in his chair, the black silk of his tunic pulling across his broad chest, masses of wild, curly hair tumbling over his shoulders and down his back.

Mage shrugged. “I am sorry.”

“No he’s not.” Warrant glanced at the red head. “Mage’s area of expertise isn’t training guards, it’s aggravation.”

“Clam up, the both of you.” Rain tore a piece of bread with his teeth. “You’re boring the woman…and me.”

As she ate, Honey Wine couldn’t help smiling at the playful banter of the Knights. Though none of them were blood-related, she noticed they were much like brothers. She wondered how many of them, like Torn, had been raised in the Order.

“Where’s Torn?” she asked.

“Speaking with Mahir,” Rain said. “They’ve been in his study all morning, so I guess they’ll be finishing up soon. In the meantime, we can go to the field and then riding, if you’d like.”

“In that case, I’ll go back to my room and change into trousers.” Honey Wine stood, and the Knights also rose. She felt a little uncomfortable, not accustomed to the Knights’ formal manners, which surfaced sporadically. One moment they were bowing over her hand, and the next they were gulping food like starving dogs. Most of them weren’t at all like Torn. He was so reserved and reflective, as if his mind was always churning. She wondered if some of that churning revolved around her?

Her room was close to the stairway, and as she paused to open her door, she heard angry conversation from the corridor above. She tried not to listen, but when she heard Torn’s voice, she ventured partway up the steps. She’d never heard him raise his voice in anger, even through the worst tortures of Alva’s prison.

“I will not continue with this lie any longer, Mahir!”

“This attitude is unreasonable and unacceptable.” Mahir’s deep voice was tinted with his own repressed fury.

“What you propose is unacceptable.”

“What good would it do to tell her, Torn? Don’t you see it doesn’t really matter now? It was one deception, and keeping it quiet will both serve our Order and protect her feelings.”

“I can’t believe I’m hearing this. It goes against everything we stand for!”

“We stand to protect the weak!” Mahir snapped. “And we must do anything to ensure their safety.”

“Don’t stand there and tell me what I have to do! I’ve done it! Do you have any idea what it was like in that prison?”

“I don’t deny you’ve suffered,” Mahir’s voice softened, his anger fading, “but I still say telling will not help her or us.”

“I killed Redly,” Torn continued, paying no attention to his foster father’s words. “One of my own men. One of us. I trained him, and I killed him.”

“You acted on instinct. You can’t blame yourself for that.”

“If it hadn’t been for Honey Wine, I’d be dead or worse. I’d have ended up like Redly.”

“You know that I’m forever in her debt for what she did for you, but don’t you understand that if you tell her, she might be hurt and angry. Like it or not, Torn, we still need her help.”

“She’ll give it.”

“You can’t be sure –”

“I’m sure! You don’t know her like I do. In spite of all she’s endured, all she’s seen, her heart is true. She was imprisoned for speaking against the Entertainment. Do you honestly think she’ll deny us the information required to end it forever?”

End the Entertainment? Honey Wine’s thoughts raced. How? What was the lie Torn spoke of? What was he keeping from her?

“I’m telling her, Mahir. I owe her that.”

“Torn, you’ve always been a reasonable man. Think this through.”

“I’ve had months to think this through! The only thing that stopped me from telling her weeks ago was my loyalty to this Order.”

“You’re endangering our duty if you tell her.”

Drawing a deep breath, Honey Wine decided it was time to find out for herself the topic of their discussion. She knocked on the door.

“Enter,” Mahir called.

She stepped inside and said, “Tell me what?”

“Honey Wine,” Torn said.

For a moment she stared at him. It was the first time she’d seen him out of prison clothes, and she was stunned by his beauty. His tall, sleek body was draped in the traditional black silk uniform of his Order, a circle of red thorns embroidered around a ruby over his heart. Black leather trousers tucked into calf-high boots encased his long, muscled legs. A sheathed sword dangled at his hip, and black gloves covered his hands. His black hair was combed back from his face and tied at his nape with a strip of leather. For a moment, her heartbeat skipped, then she forced herself back to reality.

“I’m sorry for listening, but I heard shouting. What have you lied about, Torn?” Honey Wine looked directly into his dark blue eyes.

He drew a long breath, and she noticed Mahir watching them intently.

“Make sure you’re saying this for her sake and not to cleanse your own soul,” Mahir warned.

“Torn?” she pressed.

He turned from her and looked at Mahir. “I’m sorry, but she has to know.”

Mahir nodded, smiling slightly. “Then I will give you privacy.” He walked to the door, pausing for a moment in front of Honey Wine. “You can believe whatever he tells you. Torn is honest to a fault.”

Honey Wine lifted her chin and met Mahir’s eyes. “I would consider such integrity a virtue, not a fault.”

“Don’t misunderstand me, Honey Wine. Torn is a magnificent Knight. The Spirit knows, he’s upheld all his vows, something few of us, including myself, can say. But it’s always a pure heart which shatters, is it not? His integrity is what worried me from the first.”

Mahir closed the door behind him, leaving Torn and Honey Wine facing one another. His eyes gleamed with too many emotions to discern, and she noticed a pulse beating in his throat. She longed to touch him, but resisted the urge and folded her hands behind her back as she said, “Tell me.”

He walked to the table, his long fingers playing with a books’ leather spine.

The last time she’d sensed such tension in him was when he’d been tortured by The Lady. Suddenly she was terrified of what he was about to say.

“I wasn’t captured by your sister’s guard,” he began. “I
let
myself be captured.”

Honey Wine stared at him, aghast, momentarily unable to comprehend the absurdity of his words. Finally she said, “What do you mean, you
let
yourself be captured?”

“We’ve heard rumors about the Entertainment, but the participating kingdoms have kept it so well hidden that no one had any proof. Mahir is a friend of the High King, and he’s been pressuring him for years to investigate the possibility of the Entertainment. Such an investigation would cause trouble in the kingdoms, and the Entertainment sounded so incredible that the King was not willing to risk disturbance. However if we found proof that it existed, he promised to put an end to it, no matter what the consequences. All of us have different functions here, in addition to our required duties of healing and protecting the weak. I lead a faction of spies. Redly was one of them. Last year, he was sent to find proof that the Entertainment existed. He never returned.”

“So you went after him?” she murmured.

“Yes. I expected severe conditions, but nothing like what I experienced in there. Your sister’s security is very good. Once I got in, I couldn’t get out. You saved my life, Honey Wine.”

She walked to a bookshelf, staring at the leather-bound volumes without really seeing them. The intimate moments they’d shared suddenly made her cringe. “I understand. You needed me to escape. I would have done the same in your place.”

“I wanted to tell you.” He placed a hand on her shoulder. She stiffened and jerked away. “Honey Wine, please.”

“You don’t have to say anymore.” She shrugged. “It doesn’t matter. In my own way, I needed you just as much as you needed me. Without you, I never would have dreamed of escaping. Now, I heard Mahir say you need me for something else?”

She turned to him and noticed a strange expression on his face. She knew what he’d just told her was difficult for him, but she didn’t care. She had been falling in love with him, and he’d been using her to escape.

“Now that we know the Entertainment is real, we can stop it. Would you be willing to help us do that?”

“How?”

“We plan on attacking the fortress in the woods where the fighting takes place. To do that, we’ll need to get to your sister. You know the palace. We want you to give us a map.”

“You want to go back there? Are you mad? If she gets you again –”

“She won’t. This time, I’ll be going in fully armed and prepared. I’ll have others with me. Will you do it, Honey Wine? Will you help us?”

She folded her arms across her chest and sighed. “On one condition.”

He lifted an eyebrow.

“I want to go with you.”

“You cannot go with us,” Torn stated.

He, Mahir, and Honey Wine sat at the table in the library, negotiating the price of her help in mapping out her sister’s palace.

It was an hour after she’d learned the truth about the Ruby Order’s plan to put an end to the Entertainment. Though she understood Torn’s secrecy about his purpose while in the dungeon, she couldn’t help feeling hurt that he hadn’t trusted her enough to confide in her before their escape. Though she hoped he’d finally told her because he’d grown to love her as much as she loved him, she was not foolish enough to believe such a fantasy. More likely he’d told her because he could no longer endure her kisses and her intimate touches. He’d probably only tolerated them to ensure her help in his escape.

“Because you think I’ll try to warn my sister?” Honey Wine snapped at him.

His blue eyes bore into hers. “No. Of course not.”

“Then why? Because I’m a woman? I assure you, when I was in the guard I was far more skilled than most of the men under me.”

Torn shook his head, an exasperated smile tugging at his lips. “You’re absurd! I thought you were skilled enough to plan an escape, but suddenly I’m judging you by your sex?”