Toil and Trouble (14 page)

“What is your current affiliation with Randall?”

“He’s my employer,” I said, imagining where this conversation was headed.

Sinjin chuckled. “I am not a fool, Love.”

“What do you want to know?” Irritation crept into my voice.

“Are you in love with him?”

I swallowed hard, never imagining this question would come from Sinjin. Course, the thought that we’d be discussing my feelings for Rand had never been a subject I’d ever really considered discussing with anyone aside from Rand, himself, or Christa.

“Yes.”

Sinjin nodded, as if weighing the information. “And does he love you?”

I almost laughed. That was the fifty million dollar question. Since our recent tryst, Rand had made it clear that sex between us would invariably lead to bonding which he didn’t appear to want any part of, so I guessed the answer was probably “no”.

“I don’t know,” I said simply.

Sinjin shook his head and clucked his tongue in admonition. “Not a very nice situation for you, now is it?”

“How is this any of your business?” I turned on him with a great show of anger. It was okay for me to realize the futility of a relationship with Rand but hearing it from someone else, especially Sinjin, really irked me. I wanted to leave his ice cold ass in the ice cold garden but his hand on mine stopped me.

“I did not intend to offend you, Love,” he said, smiling. “I share a common interest with Randall.”

I watched him warily. “Which is?”

“You.”

I always knew Sinjin was interested in me but I could never truly gauge what his motivations were—whether genuine or merely as a means to an end. He obviously wanted to have sex with me but that didn’t mean much to me right now. In fact, it meant diddly squat.

“Sinjin, I want to keep our relationship purely platonic.”

“What are your feelings toward me?”

“I don’t know,” I said, turning away from him. “But, I do know I don’t want to have this conversation anymore.”

He nodded. “Do you love me?”

“No,” I said quickly.

He didn’t take any offense which was good because I hadn’t intended to offend him.

“Do you find me…attractive?”

That was easy. I’d have to be blind not to find him attractive. “You know I do, but...”

“Then what is the problem?” he asked with a boyish grin.

“The problem?” I repeated. “There are a couple of problems, first that we’re on the verge of a war. Second, I’m in love with Rand even though I’m trying to get over it.”

“All surmountable issues, Love,” he said, drumming his fingers on the iron of the bench. “I am not concerned with this war. I have lived over six hundred years and in that period, the creatures of the Underworld have never lived together harmoniously.”

“Have they ever declared war against one another?”

“No, but they have come close. Now as to your love for Rand, that is a small problem. I suppose we shall have to wait and see what his intentions are?”

That was basically what I’d been doing since knowing him—waiting and seeing. Well, with my new resolution of moving away once all this war stuff ended, I could leave it all behind. But, I kept my decision to move away to myself. As far as I was concerned, this Underworld lifestyle would soon be behind me, with the exception of Christa, of course, and my cat.

“I guess so,” I answered.

“Do you suppose you could develop feelings for me, Poppet?”

Hmm, another good question. I didn’t want to develop feelings for Sinjin. I didn’t trust him and feeling anything for him would be a bad idea. This coming from my logical brain. As far as my idiotic heart was concerned…hmm, I didn’t even want to go there.

“I don’t want to answer these questions, Sinjin.”

“Poppet, humor me, please.”

“I don’t know if I could. You are a hard person to trust.”

He surged to his feet, his jaw tight—as if my statement had impaled itself into his heart. “What must I do to prove my feelings for you, Jolie?”

It was the first time he’d actually used my name instead of calling me Poppet, Pet or Love. It was weird—like he was suddenly all seriousness, something I wasn’t prepared for.

“I have saved your life…twice,” he continued. “I would think that proof enough for you to trust me.”

Okay, all good points but they didn’t change the fact that there was something missing—some piece of the puzzle that wouldn’t fit. “It just doesn’t make sense. You’ve been around for…ever it seems like. Why would you be interested in me?”

“You do not appear to hold yourself in very high regard. What reasons are there for me not to be interested in you, as you say?”

I scowled while he continued. “You are beautiful and strong minded. You are good—a nuance that certainly intrigues me. And you have a talent I have never seen before.”

“Aha,” I said. “That’s it. You want to control my…talent. Whether you’re aware of it or not, there’s always an underlying motive for everything you do.”

“You sound as if you know me well,” he said, straightening his posture. He seemed angry, I could see it in the straight lines of his spine.

“I’m sorry if I upset you, Sinjin.”

He shook his head. “I am not upset, though, I did not realize you thought of me in such unflattering terms.”

I closed my eyes to the onset of another headache. “I don’t want you to think I’m ungrateful for what you’re doing for me, Sinjin, or what you’ve already done. I just don’t know what to think right now between the war and Rand…it’s too much for me to deal with.”

“I did not intend to cause you chagrin, Poppet,” he said, reaching for me.

I took his outstretched hands and barely had a chance to gasp before he pulled me into him, planting his mouth on mine. My shocked mind took a second to register what was happening as I began to relive my dream all over again. His mouth was cold, incredibly so but his lips were full and soft. I closed my eyes while his hands toyed with my hair. At the feel of his tongue in my mouth, reality bitch slapped me. I shoved my hands into his hard chest, taking a few steps back, not daring to look at him. I couldn’t do this. I was too afraid that if we continued kissing, I wouldn’t be able to stop. And it just felt wrong. In the back of my mind, was Rand. Always Rand.

“Jolie,” Sinjin said, somewhat surprised.

“I, uh, I have to go.”

I spun around and started for the haven of Pelham Manor.

“I did not intend to take advantage of the situation…” he started as he wrapped his fingers around my wrist, pulling me to a stop. “I have no ulterior motives, Jolie,” he finished with a tired voice.

“I have to go,” I answered and tried to wrench my hand from his grasp.

“Again, I apologize,” Sinjin said, releasing my hand.

I didn’t say another word nor did I look back as I started forward, the urge to escape the garden and Sinjin of prime concern. I headed for the safety of Pelham Manor and my private little bedroom where I could abandon all my worries. My only desire now lay in the comfort of my cozy bed, downy pillows and one very sweet cat.

Ten

I sat and stared in the mirror that hung above my desk and practiced my concentration. Mathilda’s instructions precluded me from doing anything but concentrating. I had to learn to eclipse my own face with my new identity, and once I could achieve that, I’d done my homework for the day.

This was my fifth day of practicing my magic. Every morning after I finished doing my homework, I’d meet Mathilda who reinforced my magic with her own. She’d hold her hands an inch or so away from my face, palms facing my cheeks. After studying the model in the
Vogue
picture, she’d close her eyes and visualize my new identity. Then she’d take whatever invisible magic she’d created and hold a tiny seed within her palm as she shut her eyes again, endowing the seed with her magic. Eventually, I was supposed to take the seed-pill prior to my transformation.

The new identity I’d chosen was a very attractive woman from one of Christa’s
Vogue
magazines. She had short black hair and bright green eyes, a full mouth and cheekbones you could cut yourself on. So, she happened to be gorgeous... it wasn’t like I had much of a selection to choose from—
Vogue, CatWorld
or
Men’s Fitness
(Rand’s). Needless-to-say, I didn’t care to be a feline or a man.

As I poured my concentration into the mirror, I watched my hair sprout what appeared to be an oil leak at the roots and black poured over the blond, the long tresses disappearing until I had a shorter boy cut. A warm tan burgeoned from my cheeks and consumed my entire face as my freckles dissolved into a landscape of perfect homogeneity. My cornflower blue eyes lightened into teal before settling into an emerald while my lips inflated like two balloons. My nose tilted as my eyebrows darkened and drew a perfect arch.

Now I was no longer me. Well, my body hadn’t changed but that was only because it would take too much magic to transform me entirely. And, hey, who would recognize me by my body anyway? It was a chance I was willing to take. I’d just whip up a new outfit the old me wouldn’t be caught dead in and I’d be good to go.

I placed my hands up and over my face and head, imagining the magic emanating from me in rays of light. I captured the special light in my hands and watched it mutate into clear droplets. I released the glittering drops onto a rose petal. At the touch of the drops, the rose’s red hue increased to a deep crimson. Later, Mathilda would crush the magic petals and transfer their essence into her seed-pill.

I assumed it was due to Sinjin’s blood that I was getting better and faster with my magic. My first attempt to turn into my
Vogue
counterpart had taken over an hour, but today it took a mere fifteen minutes.

Speaking of Sinjin, our sparring continued despite the uncomfortable kiss. He never tried anything else, and kept our relationship as professional as was possible for the vampire. How I felt about it? I wasn’t sure. On the one hand, I was relieved—I mean, it wasn’t right to be in love with Rand and yet yearn for Sinjin’s touch. It was an uncomfortable thought and I pushed it to the recesses of my mind.

The blend of Sinjin’s blood combined with his personal instruction had made me undefeatable during my defense training. My offense, on the other hand, still left much to be desired. It wasn’t bad, but it was nothing compared to my defense.

I still hadn’t managed to uncover any sign of the prophetess but Sinjin acted like he didn’t care which made me again question what his motive was in all of this. There had to be something...

“Jules?” It was Christa.

I quickly glanced at the rose to see if it showed any evidence of my magic but relaxed when it collapsed limply as any other cut flower from Rand’s garden.

“Hi, Chris.”

The door squeaked open. “Rand asked me to bring you to the library. He has something he wants to discuss with us.”

I hadn’t talked to Rand in over a week. He was doing his damnedest to avoid me and that was fine by me. I figured if he didn’t want to resolve our issues, then why should I? It still stung but it helped strengthen my determination to get over him and move on with my life… if moving on was even an option. The war was now just a week away and everywhere in our encampment you could feel the buzz of anticipation. There were surges of activity constantly, all day and night. Fights kept breaking out amongst the troops because everyone was so tightly wound.

“Hmm, okay,” I said, standing up. I followed Christa down the stairs and into the library, where Rand sat behind his desk, studying some papers. He glanced up when we walked in and offered a quick smile.

“Christa, do you mind pulling the door closed behind you?” he asked.

“Sure,” Christa said and did his bidding.

I took a seat in the leather arm chair furthest from Rand, trying to force myself not to inhale the air which was heavy with his clean, masculine scent. He didn’t even glance at me and I had to suppress the tide of disappointment as it wafted through me.

“I’ve made preparations for the two of you,” he started. “To ensure your safety, I’ve arranged for you to live in Australia until this war is settled.”

“Australia?” we chimed in unison.

“But,” Christa started. “John told me all the nonparticipants are staying in a fairy village in Scotland near Culloden?”

Rand nodded. “A foolish decision.”

“Why?” I asked.

He didn’t look at me but stood up and started to pace toward the logless fireplace, leaning against the mantle as he kicked one of the burnt coals with the toe of his shoe.

“If Bella prevails, it will only be a matter of time before she has all the fairy villages under her thumb. Anyone who finds herself in one, will be in for a surprise.”

Christa stood up as if the chair had just bitten her. “John promised the fairies would send a warning to their families and loved ones to tell them to escape way before Bella could ever get to them.”

“It’s not a chance I’m willing to take.”

“Well, maybe it’s a chance we’re willing to take,” I snapped, pissed off. I was mostly annoyed that Rand refused to look at me. I thought his professionalism would dictate that he at least be polite.

He ignored my comment and continued as if I hadn’t even spoken. “I’ve ordered your airline tickets and you depart in three days.”

“Three days?!” Christa squawked as my heart began palpitating. This unforeseen deportation to Australia might make my plans more difficult to pull off…

Rand never missed a beat. “I’ve also arranged for a hotel in Sydney.”

“But, I don’t want to leave John,” Christa argued.

“If this battle doesn’t go as planned, all of us will be doomed. I don’t want that for you…or Jolie.”

He started to look my way but apparently thought better of it and let his gaze fall to the floor.

“And how will we find protection in Australia?” I asked, still in shock. Well, I was mostly in shock for Christa. I had other plans for myself and they didn’t include Australia.

“You’ll live under Bella’s radar with a new identity, making it very difficult for her to find you.”

“Unless she takes Ryder with her and then he can just track me,” I said, noticing the big gaping hole in his plan.

He finally looked at me with complete indifference. “I will kill Ryder. I won’t stop until he’s dead.”

Well, Rand and I finally had one desire in common.

“And, I’ve gone to extremes to ensure that neither of you will be found. Your flight and hotel reservations are in aliases. I have new personal documents for each of you as well.” He walked to the desk and handed each of us a manila envelope. Inside were birth certificates, passports, drivers’ licenses and social security cards.

“How did you manage to get us Australian passports?” I asked, impressed.

“I have friends,” he answered, still refusing to look at me.

“So, that means we’re now Australian citizens?” Christa asked.

He nodded. “Yes, you both have dual citizenship between Australia and the United States. You’ll be able to come back to the U.S., should you ever need to although I would advise you to stay in Australia.”

Christa opened her passport and a credit card fell out, landing in her lap. “What’s this?” she asked and held it up.

“It’s a duplicate check card to my account. Should anything happen to me, I’m leaving everything to you both.”

“Rand,” I started but he shushed my concern with a wave of his hand.

“Don’t worry about the financial aspects—I’ve already executed the necessary papers.”

“But, it’s in another name—John Grant?” Christa asked, reading the card aloud.

Rand nodded. “I’ve put all my possessions in the name of John Grant so Bella won’t be able to access them. If something happens to me, you’ll need to act quickly to get my assets. I’ve hired a lawyer whose information is also within those documents.”

My stomach dropped as overwhelming sorrow washed through me. If something were to happen to Rand, it would be my undoing. Even though we’d had our fair share of pain and frustration, he was a good man. And nothing reinforced that fact more than tonight.

“Australia might be fun,” Christa said sadly, offering me a small smile.

I returned the fake smile although I knew she was withering inside. She was worrying about John—I could see it in her eyes. “Everything will be okay, Chris,” I whispered and reached for her hand, squeezing it.

She nodded and batted her eyelashes a few times to force back the tears.

“Here are your flight details and your hotel reservations,” Rand said and handed a neat pile of papers to Christa.

“Thanks,” she said meekly.

He smiled, pausing for one long moment as if he had something to say. And damn it all, I wanted him to say something, anything. Tell me he’d missed me, that he cared.

He straightened his posture. “If you don’t have any questions, I’ll excuse myself as I have much to attend to.”

Christa stood up and neared the door, me on her heels. Once outside the door, I paused and turned back around. “I’ll be back in a second,” I said and she just gave me a smile and nod of understanding.

I shoved my way back into Rand’s office and closed the door behind me. Rand glanced up from behind his desk, immediately dropping his attention once he saw it was me.

“I’m busy, Jolie,” he said.

“I know,” I started, walking up to him. “I just wanted to thank you for everything you’ve done for us.”

He nodded. “You’re welcome.”

“Are you that worried about this war?” I asked, taking a seat in one of his leather chairs.

He glanced up, irritation etching his angular face. “Jolie, I’m preoccupied.”

I tried to quell the angry tide rising within me, trying to understand why he seemed so pissed off. I mean, I knew we were in a tough situation with the whole bonding scenario and granted, I’d been avoiding him just as much as he’d been avoiding me over the last couple of weeks but this wasn’t called for. Unable to defeat the anger within me, I stood up, bracing my hands on my hips. “What is your freaking problem?”

His attention fell back on the papers littering his desk and I thought he’d just ignore me. After a moment or two, he looked up and his face was flushed. “I don’t have a problem.”

“Bullshit. You’re about to explode, your face is so red.”

He stood up and approached the door, opening it wide. “I don’t have the time nor interest in discussing this subject right now.”

“I’m not leaving,” I said, taking two steps nearer him and kicking the door shut. “Not until you tell me why you’re acting like such an asshole.”

The door slammed and reverberated through the whole house. I’d have to be more careful with my newly acquired vampire strength, lest Rand get wise to my activities of late.

“You…” he started and then stopped, running his hands through his hair. Apparently he hadn’t noticed my superhuman strength. Phew…

“You know,” I continued,” I had no problem avoiding you after all this bonding stuff but what you’re doing now is a little much.”

“This has nothing to do with bonding,” he sputtered between clenched teeth.

“Then what does it have to do with?”

He finally gave me eye contact and I could see he was livid. “It has everything to do with the fact that you don’t give a fuck about me or my feelings.”

“Whoa…what?” I asked, completely floored.

“Don’t pretend, Jolie, everyone knows you’re a terrible liar.”

I wasn’t sure if I wanted to hit him or cry. “Before you accuse me, I have a right to know what’s got your panties in a bunch,” I protested.

He paused and then faced me, incensed. “I saw you and Sinjin.”

My heart dropped and I had to steady myself against the wall. He’d seen us sparring? That meant he knew I’d been planning on attending the battle all along and there went my carefully constructed plan. There was no way Rand would allow me to fight now which meant all my efforts were basically fruitless.

“I can explain,” I started, wondering where the hell I should start. Was my cover totally blown or could I still salvage some of it? My mind started racing with excuses; I could say we’d been practicing for the mere sake of practice? Hmm, no that wasn’t believable.