Together We Heal (16 page)

I sighed and tried to think about my life sans Max. Nope. Definitely wanted to put that particular thought in a box. And then set that box on fire.

“Things aren’t perfect. We fight and we drive each other crazy and there’s still the issue of his brother and his parents, but all the good moments far outweigh the bad and the struggles. I just… I love him.” Her eyes were shiny with emotion and I felt a tightening in my chest. She was so free with that word.

I couldn’t remember the last time I’d said it. Really said it. Not just as a throwaway comment. “I love you, babe”, or something like that tossed at my friends didn’t count. I told Stryker I hated him on a daily basis, but he knew the opposite was true.

Chewing my lip, I tried to think of a simple way out of my current predicament. I could just throw caution to the wind and strip down and tell him to take me. Fuck my brains out. He’d do it and it would probably be completely mind-blowing if all of our other physical interactions were any indication.

What about after? After we could breathe normally and the sweat dried and the euphoria wore off, what then?

I couldn’t answer that question.

“When it’s right, love will find a way. Despite everything, it will find a way,” Lottie said, rubbing my arm to comfort me. I wasn’t big on physical touch, but I’d gotten more used to it since I’d made friends.

“Thanks for listening. And not being too pissed about me lying to you,” I said.

“Anytime, babe,” Lottie said, getting up and giving me a hug. I looked over and locked eyes with Max. He was giving me the kind of look that said he was thinking about what we’d done yesterday. Like a bolt of lightning, the need to do it again shot through me so fast my knees wobbled.

“You okay?” Lottie asked, noticing, of course. I plastered a big fake smile on my face.

“Yup. Peachy keen.” She gave me a look that said my smile probably looked a little deranged, but whatever. I couldn’t see Max, but I could feel him walking toward us. His arms encircled my waist and I let myself rest back against him.

“Ready to go?” he said in my ear. I nodded, not trusting my voice at the moment. He wasn’t even touching me in a sexual way, but I felt like Zan and Lottie were getting way too much of a show.

“You two have a good night,” Lottie said with a wink. “And call me if you ever need to talk.” She pointed her finger at me and I nodded. Zan called out his goodnight and then we were out in the chilly night again.

I barely noticed. My body was on fire.

I WASN’T SURE
if she was going to let me go ahead again so soon, but the second we got into her room, she slammed the door and fucking attacked me.

OKAY. That was what we were doing. She was so eager that her teeth drew blood and it mixed with her taste and I wondered for a fraction of a second if I was a vampire and I’d just never figured it out.

Hair got pulled, clothes got torn, growls and moans filled the air. We were like two wild animals who were fighting one minute and fucking the next. It was raw and hard and rough.

And it was the hottest fucking thing ever.

Just when I thought Trish had reached the pinnacle of sexiness, she jumped up a few levels. I didn’t know how much more I could seriously take.

She broke the kiss and her violet eyes seared into mine. She hadn’t even had time to take out her contacts and her eyes were even more intense with the unnatural color.

“I want you to go down on me,” she said and for a second, I thought I had blacked out.

“You?” I said. I was only capable of forming words with one syllable. Hell, I wasn’t sure what my name was at the moment.

She sat up (somehow we’d ended up horizontal on her bed, which I definitely didn’t recall happening) and removed the rest of her clothes, pausing for just a second with her fingers hooked into her panties.

“You. Don’t…” I still couldn’t say actual words and that made her laugh just a little. She took one bracing breath and then pulled her panties off and my girlfriend was naked in front of me for the first time ever and yes, I was dead. I was definitely dead.

I’d seen almost everything else before, but the fact that the only thing that stood between me and all that perfect skin was air made it so much more. So. Much. More.

She allowed herself a moment of shyness and then she lifted her chin and dared me to say something. Fortunately, words weren’t in my wheelhouse at the moment, so I just got up and went to her, pulling her into my arms. I only had my boxers on, but I thought she would be more comfortable if we were both on a level naked playing field, so I slipped them off.

She’d seen me before, but the way she looked down at me made me feel like I could bench press a fucking building while saving a million little old ladies while also doing an epic victory dance to end all victory dances.

She made me feel like I was the entire world.

I put my hands on her cheeks and tilted her head up.

“I know it scares you, but I have to tell you that I love you so much, Trish. I can’t hold the words in anymore.” I kissed her mouth and she kissed me back. It also saved her from having to answer right away. I wanted to give her some time. She pushed me away and put her arms on my shoulders.

“I want to say it. I really do. Not just because you said it, but because I think… I think I feel that way, but I’m not sure. I’m afraid and that’s the best excuse I can give you. Just know that I have never felt this way about anyone. Never trusted anyone this much with my body. I want to give you everything. Everything.”

Her feverish lips met mine again and we were right back to where we started when the door slammed.

Somehow, we got back on the bed and then I got her on her back and went to work devouring her. She writhed beneath me and I did whatever I could to make her moan as much as possible. Her fingers tugged at my hair so hard I was pretty sure I was going to be missing some in spots by the time this was over, but who the hell cared? I was getting to go down on my girlfriend, something that I’d been aching to do since the first time we’d kissed.

The first time I’d explored her body, I had taken my time. Teased her. Yeah, there was no time for that now. I was intent on my goal and the closer I got, the more I wanted it.

“
Please
, Max,” she said in that little moan that had a whiny edge to it. Demanding. Pleading. Begging. Begging for me and only me. For what I could give her.

I fucking loved it.

Scooting down further, I moved her legs apart. She didn’t offer any resistance, but I looked up at her face just to make sure she wanted me to do this. She put her hand in my hair and tugged.

“Please.” That was all I needed.

I sealed my mouth over her and kissed her most sensitive part. Her hips almost smashed my teeth in as she jerked from the sensation. I put one hand on her hipbone to steady her and then went to work. I was going to enjoy every single second of this.

I pulled out every single trick I knew, and tried a few things just to see what would happen. Judging by her hold on my hair, her hips and her voice, I quickly figured out what she liked and what drove her absolutely wild.

Adding a couple of fingers, I had her nearly thrashing off the bed. She was unashamed and uncontained and sweet.

Fucking perfect. My wild girl.

The begging continued in earnest as I drove her to the edge and then reeled her back in. Finally, because I was afraid she was going to yank me bald, I hooked my fingers inside her and flicked her clit with my tongue and she came, her entire body tensing and releasing as she called out, curses and nonsense and I definitely heard my name.

I let myself feel the pulses as I kept my fingers inside and when the storm calmed, I removed them and licked them clean. I would never get tired of her taste. Even if I lived a thousand years.

THERE WERE NOT
enough curse words in any language to describe what that was. I was pretty sure I used most of them when I came. I had to add another thing to the list of things I
really
liked about Max.

His. Tongue.

What he could do with that thing was nothing short of miraculous. He should be an exhibit in a museum. Scientists should study him.

My brain was babbling, but I couldn’t make it stop.

I had never thought an orgasm could even be that powerful, let alone that I would have one. I was pretty sure I’d pulled a muscle. Or several. I was going to be sore tomorrow. Much better than a stupid workout, that was for sure. Plain endorphins had nothing on orgasms.

“I think I need some time,” I blathered afterwards. Max had left the area he’d taken such good care of and was on his side, his arm propped up and watching me. I was too, whatever, to ask him to stop.

“That’s okay. Take all the time you need.” Clearly, he was hard, but he didn’t seem to be in any hurry to do something about it. Such a gentleman.

“I’m so glad you let me do that. Finally.”

“Finally?” The word sounded funny as I said it. Wow, I was really losing it. Maybe the orgasm had somehow destroyed my brain.

“Yeah. I’ve wanted to do that for forever.” I didn’t know guys liked it all that much. Huh. Or maybe it was just Max. He was probably special.

The blood started coming back to my brain and my thoughts slowly returned to normal.

I turned my head and smiled at him.

“You should get an award for that,” I said.

“The knowledge that I did a good job is all the recognition I need,” he said and I smacked him lightly in the chest with my hand. I didn’t have a whole lot of strength left.

“You know, my first boyfriend would never do that,” I blurted out. Orgasms always loosened my tongue. Like working the cork out of a wine bottle or something.

“Well, he was both an idiot and an asshole. I want to punch him in the balls on your behalf,” Max said. I was relieved he wasn’t upset about me talking about an ex.

“How old were you?” he asked as he danced his fingers around on my stomach. My muscles fluttered just a little bit at his touch. It tickled.

“Uh, I don’t really remember. Too damn young, that’s for sure.” I had been a bit of a wild child and had started getting physical early. Just before everything with my uncle, actually. Afterward, sex was… complicated. Max nodded.

“Yeah, I was fifteen. I wasn’t even dating her. It was at a stupid party and I’m pretty sure it lasted all of ten seconds. I mean, I barely got the condom on.” He chuckled and I was relieved he was comfortable with talking about this kind of thing.

“They’re always the hardest to open when you need them the most. I think it’s a conspiracy,” I said and he laughed. This was a first. I had never just stayed in bed with someone and talked. While naked. Usually when I had sex with someone, I couldn’t get out fast enough. And that was when I actually went through with it and didn’t end up crying or something. And that was when I actually was able to go through it. There had been plenty of times when I hadn’t.

“That would make total sense,” Max said with a serious face. We went from talking about our first times to embarrassing sex stories, some not necessarily ours.

“I will never get that sound out of my head,” I said when I told him about the girl Stryker brought home once who sounded like a wounded donkey when she came. Weird thing was that she was cute and tiny, but she had the bray of a much bigger girl. Max laughed and told me about the second girl he’d been with. Hearing about those girls didn’t really bother me. A little, but I knew he wasn’t serious about any of them.

“I always sort of separated sex and dating,” he said and I totally agreed. “Well, until you. I want to do everything with you.”

I raised my eyebrows.

“Everything?”

He gave me a smile and then leaned down and kissed one of my nipples.

“Everything.”

IT WAS SO
easy to talk about sex with her. At first I wasn’t sure about telling her my history, but she opened up about hers and it didn’t seem weird after that. Neither of us had a good track record anyway. I’d sure had a lot of terrible sex in my life. I’d pretty much given up on it when I came to school.