To Love and Honor (17 page)

Violet undressed and lay upon the bed, although she didn't expect to sleep. Once she thought of telephoning Pastor Tom, but what could he do for her now? As she stared dry-eyed at the ceiling, Violet remembered Jesus's words from the cross, “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?” It must have been an anguished cry for already his friends had betrayed, denied and deserted him, but the ultimate despair came at that moment when He feared that God, too, had deserted Him.

Strangely enough, even though Roger had repudiated her, she didn't feel forsaken by God, and it gave her the strength to go on. She didn't want to return to Maitland, didn't think she could possibly face Roger, but what else could she do? Her home and her job were there, as were her friends. She could eventually go back to Minnesota and live near Aunt Ruth, who would be glad to have her, and that might be a good move.

For the time being, at least, she would have to return to Maitland to make the decisions that loomed ahead—how to evade her grandfather's clutches and whether or not to approve the documentary on her mother's trial. Roger wouldn't help her make those decisions, but her faith was strong that God would. God had never said that his followers would be exempt from problems, although He promised His presence in the midst of trouble.

She thought of the many times in the Bible when He had brought others from the depth of despair and made them viable people again. Probably David was one of the best biblical examples to prove that God's
people were not exempt from trouble. Although expressly chosen by God to lead the Hebrew nation, his father-in-law had plotted his death, his sons had disappointed him, one had even aspired to usurp his father and the Hebrew king lost some of his sons by death. Yet David had praised God even in the midst of his trials. She remembered his words, “Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.”

Those words described Violet's condition. Her soul was disturbed, but today's happenings had brought her to the place where she recognized that her only hope was in God. Roger was human, so it was natural that he would disappoint and fail her. Larry had hurt her by his rejection. Her mother and father had left her a nasty, devastating and scandalous heritage. Only God had the power to sustain her. And although she knew some momentous decisions awaited her on the morrow, her heart was at peace and she was able to sleep when she remembered other words of the Psalmist, believing that what God had done for David, He would do for her: “I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me.”

After she showered and dressed the next morning, Violet went downstairs to the restaurant for breakfast. Although she hadn't eaten since her lunch with the O'Briens yesterday, she had little appetite, but she ordered coffee, toast and oatmeal. She didn't believe today's revelations could possibly be worse than what she had endured yesterday, but whatever she faced, she knew better than to tackle it on an empty stomach.

As she walked across the lobby after eating, the clerk called, “You had a telephone call while you
were out of your room. I didn't know you were in the restaurant or I could have paged you.” He handed her a sheet of paper, on which he had written, “Return the call of Josiah Conley.”

So he had traced her. She should has suspected that.

Coming to a quick decision, she said to the clerk, “I'll be checking out of the hotel this morning. I had intended to stay until tomorrow, but I believe I can finish my work and leave today.”

She hurriedly packed her bags. Now that her grandfather had found out where she was, he might very well come to the hotel when she didn't return his call. She absolutely couldn't talk to the man until she had time to assimilate what she had learned in the past few days. If she approved the documentary on her mother's trial, her grandfather would be very unhappy, and she had decided that she must think and pray more before she came to a decision. As soon as she finished with O'Brien, she would head toward Maitland. Today was Friday, and she could be home by Saturday evening, which would give her some time of preparation before returning to school on Monday.

 

“Has something else happened?” O'Brien asked immediately upon seeing Violet, and she surmised that her demeanor must appear even worse than yesterday.

“Well, yes, you could say that,” she said bitterly. “I telephoned my fiancé last night, and he was reluctant to talk to me. When I asked him to come here to talk with you about the trial, and to go with me to talk with my grandfather, he told me I would have to handle this one by myself.”

Violet paused, and her thoughts were bitter, but she was tearless and resigned to doing without Roger. She
really couldn't blame him for turning her down; she had burdened him with her problems so much the past few months. Perhaps he thought it was time for her to act more independently. But that still didn't prevent her from feeling dejected.

“He probably knows more about Josiah Conley than you do.”

“Quite possibly, for I didn't know anything until Tuesday. Then this morning, I had a telephone call from my grandfather at the hotel, but I wasn't in my room to receive the call. I'd changed hotels to prevent his tracing me, but he did. As soon as I finish here, I'm leaving town. I can't encounter him again. I'm afraid of him.”

“And so you should be. Very few people have ever confronted Josiah Conley and come out the victor. I hope you don't think I'm just prejudiced against the man. I have proof of my allegations. He has a thirst for power, and whom he can't control, he destroys.”

“So does that mean he will destroy me if I don't do what he wants?”

“Perhaps, but if you do what he wants, you'll also be destroyed. You have a better chance of survival if you stay away from him. It's too bad you had the misfortune to have Josiah Conley for your grandfather.”

“I've wondered why my mother ever married into the Conley family. Surely, she must have known what they were like.”

“Remember, she didn't live in Kansas City. She met your father in Topeka, where he was managing a branch of Midwest Enterprises. He was a handsome man, with a lot of charisma, and she didn't consider his family when she fell in love with him. I believe
Ryan wanted her because she was mild-tempered and went along with everything he wanted. He'd had enough domination all of his life, and Linda's quiet ways salved his ego. They were happy, at first, until Josiah called them back to Kansas City—that's when the trouble started.”

“I'll spend the morning reading old newspapers, and then I'm going home, although I suppose I won't even be safe there.”

“Didn't you say your fiancé is a policeman? He can protect you.”

Violet grimaced. “Don't forget, he may not want to be my fiancé now?”

She didn't learn much more from the newspapers than she already knew, and by early afternoon, O'Brien took her into his private office for a consultation. His secretary was working today, and their conversations were guarded.

“So now you know,” he said.

“Yes, and I'm not sure I'm any better off, but I do know. Now what do I do with my knowledge?”

“That is your decision.”

“You don't know how weary I've become of hearing those words the past few months,” Violet said.

“Decisions! Decisions!”

“But consider—have they been good decisions?”

She thought of the decisions she had made. She had defied Larry to assure that Janie received the Best of Show award. That was good. She had decided to bring her mother from prison, and that, too, had turned out well. She had become engaged to Roger, and that was the best decision of all, or at least it seemed that way until their telephone conversation last night.

“Up until I made the decision to meet my grand
father and check into my mother's past—they were good. But I disregarded the advice of my mother and Aunt Ruth. Only time will tell whether that was a good or bad decision. Right now, it doesn't seem good.”

“Go back to Maitland before you come to any conclusion. Think it over carefully, and if I can be of any help to you, I'm as close as the telephone.”

 

Violet left Kansas City by late evening, and breathed a sigh of relief when she accessed I-70, crossed the border into Missouri, and glimpsed the beautiful skyline of the city in her rearview mirror. As long as she was in Kansas, she didn't feel safe from her grandfather's clutches. Her progress on Saturday was impeded when a freak spring snowstorm swept through central Missouri. By late evening, the sun was out, melting the snow, but the treacherous roads had delayed Violet, necessitating a stopover in a motel, and she arrived in Maitland shortly after noon on Sunday.

W
hen Violet parked in her driveway, she leaned her head on the steering wheel and breathed a prayer of thanksgiving. It had been a frustrating journey, for at times, she was hardly conscious of where she was and what she was doing. Surely God must have given her special attention on the long drive home, because in her present mental state of mind, she didn't believe she was capable of driving an automobile.

After she put Kansas City behind her, she had pushed the threat of her grandfather in the background, but even then she couldn't concentrate on operating the auto. Over and over she wondered how to effect a reconciliation with Roger, or if she should even try, but now that she was back in Maitland, she had an overpowering desire to see him. All her life, she had been alone, but she had gotten accustomed to Roger's company and care, and she was completely bereft without him. But if he no longer wanted her? She could barely stand the thought. She admitted that she couldn't blame any man for not wanting to marry a
person with a family background such as hers. But that hadn't seemed to matter to Roger. Perhaps she was reading something into his refusal to come to Kansas City that he hadn't intended. Was it fair to deny him the opportunity to defend himself?

Again she had no control over her actions as she went immediately to the phone and dialed Roger's number. Misty answered, and when Violet asked for Roger she said, “He isn't here, Miss Conley. Right after lunch, he put the dogs in the truck, and I suppose he went to the farm.”

After thanking Misty, Violet changed into rugged clothing and headed out of town. Mentally and physically, she was exhausted, but she would never rest until she saw Roger, believing she would be able to tell from his facial expression if he was through with her.

She parked her car beside his house and walked up the farm road toward the hillock. An hour later, she was sitting on the tailgate of the truck when he came out of the trees followed by the two dogs, who set up a howl when they saw her.

Did his steps decelerate as if he were reluctant to meet her? She couldn't be sure, and she didn't speak when he came to the truck. He went through the regular ritual of giving the animals food and drink before he came to stand beside her.

“When did you get back?” he asked.

“About noon.” She looked at him piercingly. “I wondered if I should return at all.”

He playfully chucked her under the chin, but his dark eyes were watchful as he said, “Did becoming a rich woman sound better than anything you could find in Maitland?”

Tears welled in her eyes. “Roger, do you think any amount of money would make up for losing you? Why have you been so cold and distant with me this week? I thought if there was any person in this whole world I could depend upon to understand what I've endured the past few days, it was you.” Her lower lip quivered, and she clamped it between her teeth to stop the trembling, but she couldn't do anything about the tears that cascaded down her cheeks.

“But I haven't been…” Roger began, as he moved closer and stood eye level with her as she sat on the truck.

“Yes, you have. You told me once you would be there for me any time I needed you, and I've never needed support as much as I have this past week, and you wouldn't even let me talk to you about it.”

Her tears turned into sobs, and Roger gathered her into his arms. “Oh, my dear, you have it all wrong. I was trying to do what was best for you—I didn't mean to hurt you.” He rocked her back and forth in his embrace, and her body shook as her sobs faded into the plaintive cries of a wounded animal. Roger was crying, too, and he couldn't speak, but finally he swiped his eyes with the back of his hand and cleared his throat noisily.

“Come, sweetheart, let's drive down to the house. You're cold, and we need to clear up this misunderstanding between us.” He lifted her from the seat and carried her to the truck cab. He soon secured the dogs, and they drove in silence to the house.

“Are you hungry?” he asked, as he opened the door into his retreat.

“Probably. I haven't eaten anything today. I may not have eaten yesterday—I don't remember.”

He turned on the heater. “Let me take your coat,” Roger said. “The room will heat in a hurry. We'll eat later, but let's talk first.”

They sat on the couch, and Roger pulled her close, for Violet was still shaking, and she didn't know if the trembling was caused from cold or stress.

“You couldn't have felt more lonely than I have this week,” he said. “When you telephoned Tuesday night and said your grandfather wanted to make you his heir, and that he would accept me sight unseen as your husband, and all it would cost me was to change my name to Conley, I thought that was funny, at first. Then, I flipped on the late news and saw the telecast where you were at your grandfather's palatial home, wearing that fancy black dress and sporting diamonds that I couldn't buy with ten years' salary, seemingly right at home in that environment. Talk about feeling alone! I didn't sleep at all that night, afraid of losing you, saddened by how this turn of events could ruin our lives.”

“But I told you—I was virtually forced to stay for that reception and dressed up like a mannequin by his servant. My grandfather is a man who will not take no for an answer. He practically imprisoned me.”

“Well, he will have to take no from me. I couldn't possibly be happy as your husband if I succumbed to the lure of riches, changed my name to Conley and became a tool of your grandfather's. But on the other hand, I didn't think I had the right to deny you your rightful inheritance, and if you wanted to take him up on his proposal, I wouldn't stand in your way. I would sacrifice my happiness for yours.”

Violet pushed out of his arms, and her vivid eyes blazed in anger. “I wish people would stop being so
self-sacrificial for me. My mother denied me for years because she was doing what was best for me, and I grew up without knowing my mother. And you plunged me to the depth of despair when you told me I was on my own ‘with this one.' Did you consider that I didn't believe I should reject my grandfather's proposal without discussing it with you? We're engaged to be married—I thought from now on, we didn't make independent decisions.”

Roger chuckled, kissed her lightly on the lips and hugged her close again.

“I hadn't thought of that.”

“Not many men would turn down a chance to become a millionaire overnight. You've admitted that it won't be easy for you to put two children through college and take on a new family besides. If you were willing to work for my grandfather, why should I say no for you?”

He smoothed back her hair and kissed her forehead. “I'll admit that I was tempted for a while. My parents were poor, and my mother needs everything she has for her own livelihood—I will never inherit anything from her. What I have, I've worked for, and when the going has been rough, I've often wondered how it would be to never have to worry about where my next dollar would come from. But I've heard of Josiah Conley, and although I hadn't connected him with you, he has the reputation of being a hard man—he wouldn't give us everything he has without expecting a lot in return. I don't believe we could have a happy marriage living in his household.”

“Neither do I. That day I went to his house, I felt like a prisoner. He was determined that I was going to stay there, and I had to slip out of the house when
he was busy elsewhere to even return to my hotel. I changed hotels, and he found me there, but I left Kansas City without returning his calls, for when I found out how he had manipulated my mother's trial, I knew there was no place for him in my life. That's why I telephoned you—I hoped you would come to me as you had when Mother died, go with me to tell my grandfather we were rejecting his offer, and drive home with me. I knew he wouldn't accept my refusal if I didn't have your support, but when you were so unapproachable, I wouldn't insist.”

Roger pulled her close. He kissed her closed eyelids, her throbbing throat, the tips of her ears, and each finger. When he came to her lips, the dull heartache that Violet had endured for the past few days disappeared, and she laced her arms behind his neck, cherishing the warmth and strength of his embrace. The agony of the past week receded, and his caresses brought assurance of a future that she was eager to start.

“Let me promise you something now,” Roger whispered, his lips nuzzling the soft curve of her throat. “I'll never forsake you again—no matter what you face, I'll be there. Any decisions we make from now on, we'll make them together. This vow is just as sacred to me as the one I'll take on our wedding day when I promise to love you ‘until death do us part.'”

When he ended their embrace, Violet said, “Then it seems we've agreed that we have no interest in accepting my grandfather's proposal, but we have to make a decision on that documentary about my mother and father. And don't tell me that I'm on ‘my own' with it. It's a sordid story, and we may not want our
children to have to live with its aftermath if we make the facts widespread.”

“I want to hear about what you learned from the lawyer, but if you haven't had any food today, we must find a restaurant. I have snack food in this house, but nothing substantial. I'll leave the truck here, and we can go in your car to a restaurant in a nearby town.”

“I do feel hungry, but I don't want to eat in Maitland.” She ran her fingers over her hair and touched her hot, swollen face. “I must look terrible.”

Roger kissed the tip of her red, sniffy nose. “Not to me. You look wonderful, especially when I've been living with the fear that I'd lost you.”

“I dread going back to school tomorrow, but I'll have to make some preparations tonight, so after we've eaten, I'll go home and work. Perhaps we can be together tomorrow night.”

“I go on night shift in a few hours for a week, but I can see you early tomorrow evening.”

On their way to the restaurant, Violet told Roger briefly about the death of Ryan Conley by her mother's hand, and they agreed that in the interest of justice the facts of the trial should be aired on television.

 

When the phone rang right before bedtime, Violet assumed it was Roger checking in to see how she felt, but to her surprise, Olivia Holland was on the phone.

“I hoped that I would catch you at home,” Mrs. Holland said in the cultivated, honey tones she used when she wanted to be the most pleasing. “Larry said you were due back for school in the morning.”

“Yes, I came home about noon today.”

There was a pause, which Mrs. Holland finally broke. “I was pleased to learn that you
are
related to the Kansas City Conleys. I met your grandparents several years ago at a political rally in Saint Louis. I hope you will remember me to them the next time you see them.”

Apparently Roger wasn't the only Maitland resident to see her in the splendor of the Conley mansion.

“My grandmother died a few years ago, and I doubt that I will be going there again. I went to Kansas City for another purpose, but my grandfather had asked to see me, so I did pay him a visit, but I had little in common with him, so we won't be developing a filial relationship.”

“But, Violet, if you'll forgive me for advising you, if Josiah Conley wants to recognize you, it would be well for you to accept his patronage. He's a big man in that region, and he could do much for you.”

Yes, he could make me a prisoner to his will and plans,
Violet thought, but she let Mrs. Holland ramble on.

“I appreciate your concern, Mrs. Holland, but this is a matter I will have to work out with my grandfather.”

Before Mrs. Holland terminated the conversation, Violet was half tempted to tell her that Josiah Conley would make her his heir if she would come to live with him, marry and have a family to carry on the family fortune. Mrs. Holland would probably rouse Larry out of his easy chair and send him over to propose immediately, but she resisted the temptation. Violet didn't intend to circulate the fact that she'd had a multimillion-dollar legacy laid at her feet and that she was going to reject it.

 

Monday was a hectic time for Violet. The first day back after a long break was always a difficult time to corral the students into working, but after three years of teaching, Violet expected that. What she did not expect was all the attention she received because of the reception she had attended at the Conley mansion in Kansas City. Everyone in Maitland must know by now about her connection to the Czar of the Midwest, as she had learned Josiah Conley was often called.

She hadn't been in her room ten minutes when Larry stopped in, all smiles. He put his arm around her shoulders, and she cringed at his touch.

“It's good to see you this morning, Violet. All ready for the avalanche of students?”

She moved away from his embrace as she continued to place worksheets on the students' desks. She glanced at the clock. “I'd better be ready in twenty minutes, but it's always hard for me to be enthusiastic after a holiday and therefore it's difficult to motivate the students.”

“I would think that the terrific week you had would have given you lots of motivation. Why didn't you tell me you were related to the Kansas City Conleys?”

“I didn't know it myself until two months ago. I told you that I didn't know anything about my father's people.” She stopped working long enough to give him a piercing glance.

He was toying with a paperweight on her desk and wouldn't meet her gaze. “It doesn't make any difference to me.”

“A few months ago I was convinced that my questionable heritage was vastly important to you.”

The hall barriers had been removed, and students
were entering the halls, laughing and shouting, happy to see their peers after the break. Larry started toward the door. “May I take you to dinner one night this week?”