Tiger Lily: Part Three (11 page)

Jonas must have read me again. Reaching over and delicately moving the errant strands of hair the wind blew back into my face, he said, “I did it because this was supposed to be your place with me. I want you to have and hold good memories of us together here.”

We rode to the top and climbed out. Inside, we found Lin directing the movers upstairs. Once she saw us, she quickly moved our way and we stopped in the living room area. Her eyes were red-rimmed as they set on me.

“I’m so sorry you left. She was sick, I didn’t think she’d do that. I was distracted by setting up the other rooms. I didn’t mean to get you upset…” she stuttered.

I reached out and clasped her hands, but then regretted it because mine were damp and cold. “I’m not upset with you, Lin. I’m upset with all that happened.”

She nodded quickly and patted my hands.

“It’s alright, Lin,” Jonas said, placing his hand on her shoulder and guiding her a few feet away to talk. I hesitated, not sure if I should wait for the movers. Before I decided, Samuel and Ian walked into the living room, followed by a thin woman with short, slicked-back salt-and-pepper hair. She reminded me of the executives at work, dressed in a black power pants suit and pointy-toed heels.

They all took in the state of the two of us, particularly me being soaked down to my now bare feet and dripping on the hardwood floors. Maybe that was why the woman’s mouth was gaping and Ian had a deep frown creasing his smooth forehead. Glancing at Jonas, the woman recovered. Putting on a tight smile, she spoke first. “Jonas, I’m going to have to get going, but I’ll send an update to you on the status later,” she said.

“Sounds good, Diane.” He turned to me. “This is Diane Langston.”

My eyes widened and shifted away from her once I recalled how I knew her. She was the lawyer I had avoided speaking with about Declan. Was she here about that?

“We’ve met only on the phone,” Diane confirmed, turning back to me. “And I’m sorry I’m out the door now. I know you want to get out of those wet clothes, so I won’t keep you,” she said, waving her hand as she hastened her steps to the front door.

“I’ll see her out, Mr. Crane, and will be back soon, Ms. Salomé,” Samuel said and followed after her.

I looked questioningly at Jonas, but his gaze was fixed on Ian, whose narrow stare I found on me. “Jonas, I see you’ve got everything under control and are handling things as perfectly as you said,” Ian said icily, his mouth set in a firm line.

I lifted my chin. “I’d like to know if Diane coming by has something to do with my case,” I said to Jonas, ignoring Ian.

“She was here as a consultant,” Ian answered, as they both glared at each other. “I’ll be in your office.”

“Or you can leave. In fact, I insist,” Jonas replied abruptly.

I held up my hands. “I’m tired and am going up to change.”

“And eat, you haven’t had anything since breakfast hours ago,” Lin interjected.

I blinked rapidly. “Eat, and I’m…” I swayed a bit on my feet.

Jonas immediately rushed over and swooped me up and over his shoulder.

“Put me down, please,” I protested as he walked toward the stairs.

“Bring the drinks and food up, Lin, thank you. Ian, go home. We’ll talk later,” he called out.

Jonas walked toward the master bedroom, but I tugged on his shirt. “I’d like some time alone to think over everything that happened. I’ll…sleep in the spare room, just for tonight.”

“You don’t have to sleep in there with me,” he said, his voice coarse. “But the bathroom is big, and set up. You can change and dry off. I’ll have someone stock the spare bath, but…” he walked us inside the master suite, and I looked at the large four-poster bed in the process of being built. “There is plenty of room for you in the new bed if you don’t want to sleep in my arms.” He stopped inside the bathroom, closing the door behind us.

I turned my back and shivered, my heart aching at the sadness so evident on his face. “I’d like to be alone right now, too,” I said, my teeth chattering. I could feel him before he touched me. “Lily, not taking care of you is going against my instincts, but I don’t want to pressure you,” he said.

I tilted my head down, and started nervously unbuttoning my shirt to try to keep my hands busy as he watched over me. The moment I faltered, he took over, his hands rushing through the buttons faster than my mind could keep up, pulling the fabric off. “You are justified in your anger with me, but don’t deny both of us what we want and need right now,” he said as he unhooked my bra.

My mind screamed,
I shouldn’t,
as I pulled of my bra and Jonas unbuttoned the front of my jeans, easing the soaked fabric down my legs. “You’re cold. You need to warm up,” he said.

“I need a drink of water,” I murmured. Walking over to the sink, I picked up a glass, filling it with cold water, which I quickly drank down and then refilled. Once I drained my second glass, I replaced the cup on the sink.

“A shower would heat you up,” he said as he reluctantly took my wrist. I let him lead me over to the shower and turn the nozzle to warm. I stood under the spray with my eyes closed, holding my arms. “I should be alone,” I said in a small voice.

“No, you shouldn’t. It’s okay. I’m here and I’m sorry,” Jonas said. He removed his clothes and stepped inside the shower. His arms circling my waist and his head resting on top of mine. My emotions swelled to bursting at the feel of his warm, firm body encompassing me, and I split apart and started crying. He held onto me, as if I was his last lifeline, his mouth kissing over me as he repeated, “Shhh…Don’t cry. You’re mine. Please don’t cry.”

He took me over to the bench and laid me back along the cool surface. He then kissed and touched over every inch of my body until I calmed. It was everything I wanted and needed without even asking. Jonas almost had me believing that he understood and that he may love me more than I ever imagined possible.

Yes. He loves and cares for me, but does he respect and trust me enough to stop keeping things from me?

As I calmed, I broke from his embrace. He hesitantly let me, as I asked one of the questions that was nagging me. “Why was Diane Langston here?” He folded his arms and didn’t answer.

With a huff, I went back under the spray. Reaching for the vanilla-scented wash, I started washing over my body. Jonas walked over and started doing the same to himself.

After a few minutes, he finally offered, “She came to look over what happened with Declan, and to offer advice to those I have looking into the situation, mostly in regards to the theft and photos, but that’s not all we are looking at.”

I pursed my mouth as I lathered my hair. “Were you going to tell me?”

“If I found it necessary,” he said.

I turned and met the jut of his chin with my squint. “You can’t keep this from me. I’d like to be involved in whatever you have planned, or you stop now.”

“I may be guilty of not fully disclosing Melissa’s visit, but I’ll be damned if I’m called to the carpet for protecting you. This is one of those situations where you won’t get your way, and that’s my final word on the subject,” he said.

I gaped at him and his brazen domineering display. “You can’t do that.” I whipped around, not caring if my long hair hit him as I rinsed it off and walked out of the shower, knowing my juvenile actions didn’t support my cause. Still, I seethed over his cool control over my life. It was also clear he would continue to keep secrets from me.
And I’m the one with the habit to break!

Taking one of the bath towels, I dried off and tied another in my hair. He stepped out of the shower and I had to force myself to look away as he walked over and took a towel to dry himself with.

“I don’t know if the workers are finished,” he said. “I’ll go get you something to wear.”

I crossed my arms. “I’m sorry for my behavior in the shower, but I can’t believe you think it’s acceptable to exclude me from what affects my life. My being with you doesn’t give you permission to control and run my life.”

He narrowed his gaze. “So caring about and protecting you comes with limits? If you think for one minute that I’m going to let you go up against that fucker that abused you, then you don’t know me. Now
that
, you can stay mad about. But I promise you, Lily, it won’t change a damn thing.” And with that, he snatched his robe and shut the door with force.

Now we are both being juvenile
, I thought as I continued to dry off.

A few minutes later, my pulse increased when I saw him come back into the room in a pair of low-hanging sweatpants, carrying my favorite blank tank top and sweats. I accepted the clothing from him, neither of us speaking. This time he closed the door softly when he left.

By the time I was finished getting dressed and drying my hair, the movers were gone and I was alone in the bedroom. The smell of food crossed my senses, and I eyed the large platter left for me on a small table. My stomach growled. I was hungry.

I sat down and ate the three-bean soup, salad, and bread in front of me. I was half finished with the smoothie when Dani walked through the door. My expression must not have been a good one, for she said, “I’m not going to stay. I just stopped by to make sure you were okay and to bring more food for you to eat. And also, to pick up Lin so we can go to yoga tonight.”

I shrugged. “I’m taking this down, then going to sleep,” I announced.

“I’ll take it down for you,” she said, waving for me to stay seated. “I heard what happened, and I don’t blame you for being mad,” she said. “Paul was quite animated when he described how Melissa behaved the other day, and it sounded like she was certainly being awful. I told Jonas as much.” When I didn’t say anything, she continued, “She is manipulative, but is she worth stilling your happiness?”

“What kind of happiness is built on lies and deception?” I asked and covered my mouth as the irony washed over me. I realized I was just as guilty of doing that and then some. I drooped my shoulders. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for that to come out so harsh. Today, with Melissa, just really surprised me.”

“That was one part of your whole day. One part of your experience together. Jonas isn’t perfect, and he was blindsided by her. He will work to fix this. But all he wants is for you to be happy. His way of getting there wasn’t right this one time, and he knows that now. But please don’t shut him out,” she said.

I nodded. “I don’t want to. It’s hard for the both of us. I’ll try, and I hope Jonas will do the same.”

She smiled and exhaled long. “I have been where you are for years. There will always be women after him, but you must remember how he feels about you.”

She gave me a hug, and picked up the tray, ignoring my attempt to do it myself. I followed her out of the bedroom, stopping at the spare room one door over.

“Thank you, Dani. You’re a good friend. To both of us.” She gave me a kiss on the cheek before walking back towards the stairs, and I entered the bedroom and closed the door behind me. Climbing on the queen-size bed, I slipped under the duvet cover and eventually fell asleep.

“Stop, Dec. Let go of me,” I yell, but no sound comes out.

His hands grip my head tight as he slams it down against the dashboard

His hands come across my face.

His hands grip my arms and shove me on the floor.

I scream.

“Lily!”

I continue to scream as strong hands hold me down.
He has me.

“It’s Jonas, Lily. Please wake up.”

My eyes opened and darted around, finally settling on a set above me.
They’re not green. No, they’re blue.

Jonas.

He loosened his hold on me and sprawled beside me, bringing me into his arms. “I’m here. Nothing will ever happen like that again.” I flushed as awareness returned to me. And then I found myself trapped between my anger at Jonas and my need for the comfort he was giving me.

“I know you’re still upset, but you’re still mine. Just let me hold you, even if you’re not ready to forgive me,” he said and kissed over my damp forehead.

I yielded to his arms. “Please.”

Without hesitation, he wrapped me close and rubbed over my back, repeating soothing words, lulling me into the security of his embrace from the nightmare that had robbed me of my sleep.

As my awareness returned to me, I noticed his hard erection through his sweatpants.

My body awakened with need, and Jonas, catching my shift, froze next to me. So unlike the man I knew and loved.

Taking a breath, I said, “Are you. I mean, do you want to make…have sex with me?”

He turned me around and gave me a look that I felt down to my toes. “Love. You can say ‘make love.’ I meant what I said earlier. I love you. But I’m not going to make love to you until you’re ready to give yourself back to me.”

My heart skipped a beat at his use of ‘make love’ to describe our intimacy. But I didn’t like being given ultimatums. I furrowed my brows. “So now you’re withholding yourself?”

“No, because in that we both know I would lose,” he said and smirked. “No. I mean you can have me, but you’ll initiate.”

My frown deepened. “You know that’s not what I want.”

“But you’re still upset with me,” he said.

“No. I’m confused. You are upset with me,” I replied.

“No, I’m not. But after that dream, there is no way in hell I’m leaving that piece of shit ex of yours alone. I am going to make sure you never have to worry about him again. I’d do it even if you chose to leave me.” His eyes shifted.

I rubbed the stubble on his face. “I don’t want to leave you. I’ll leave the Declan situation alone for now.” I almost left it at that, but then thought to continue while I had the guts to do so, “I love you, but you need to make a choice. I don’t trust her, and I can’t have trust in us if she continues to be around. I need you to choose. Her or me.” I held up my hand. “And before you say you have chosen, I need more than a promise.”

His face lit up and he smiled. “You’re my charging Tiger tonight.”

I lifted the corner of my mouth. “And?”

“I love you,” he said and kissed me tenderly on the lips. “Would you like to get up and eat? Or go back to sleep? I’ll leave…”