TICEES (43 page)

“The Matzar mission,” whispered Dar, “and you’ve been assigned as my Second-in-Command alongside Solis.”

Fremma turned away in a flurry of black. “That mission wasn’t to be given the go-ahead for months.”

Dar curbed his emotions while he continued through the material, his disbelief mounting. Without speaking, he turned and walked back into his chambers. Sinking into his chair, Dar turned his thoughts to Chelan, his beautiful Chelan. He loved her so much. He had deliberately avoided her out of his love, and now he was faced with the possibility of losing her permanently. Just why such dark thoughts invaded his soul he could not pinpoint.

Fremma walked out of the Command Center and joined Dar. He was filled with dread as he observed the Warlord’s poorly concealed agitation.

Dar looked up at the officer. “RIBUS 8 leaves tomorrow.”

The words slammed into Fremma, and the blow knocked the wind from his lungs.

“You leave now, my friend, to prepare for my arrival.”

Fremma could not move or speak. Then there came another knock on the door, and neither man reacted. Finally the doors opened.

Solis stepped in, immediately sensing the pall in the air. “It seems,” he began very quietly, “that we are being mobilized rather abruptly.” Solis’ eyes travelled from one man to the other. “But despite the short notice,” he continued cautiously, “it appears that Ticees has readied RIBUS 8 himself, my Lord. All systems are up.”

Dar finally looked at Solis. “Anything else?”

Solis shifted his weight uneasily as he glanced at Fremma’s drawn face. “Just that our fighters await our arrival, my Lord. Fremma and I leave now.”

Fremma was staggered by the information. Dar spoke, interrupting the warrior’s thoughts. “Fremma, where is Chelan?”

“Asleep,” he whispered.

Dar’s fists clenched spasmodically.

Fremma steadied himself. “Say good-bye to her for me,” he uttered, and he turned and left quickly, followed by Solis.

Dar sat quietly for a long time, trying to sort through everything. He rubbed his brow, his anxiety mingling with his anger in a lethal combination. “So, Ticees,” he seethed. “We win the battle, but you win the war.” He stood abruptly and looked to the ceiling, his voice scathing. “But we will return, and you had better hope that our Lady is well.”

He took a deep breath, frustrated by the fact that there was nothing he could do. To send a communiqué to Korba would only distract him, and possibly fatally. And Dar had no concrete basis by which to justify taking her with him and putting her in direct jeopardy. It was simple; she had to survive until their return. There was no other solution.

Dar moved heavily down the corridor to Korba’s quarters. He did not relish what he had to say to Chelan, and he shuddered at the thought of her reaction. But his foremost concern was that he did not run into Ticees. He knew that he would not be responsible for the actions he would levy against the Emperor, actions that he knew would only result in his own death.

Dar slipped into the dim room and approached the bed cautiously. He had not seen her for nearly three months, and his heart cried out for her as she came into sight. She slept peacefully, as beautiful in slumber as she was awake. He threw back his head, taking in a deep breath, and with it came her sweet scent. God, how he yearned for her.

He sat down quietly in a chair by the bed to wait for her to awaken. The hours passed, and his eyes never left her beautiful face. He thought of their times together on RIBUS 7, and his body was shot through with warmth. He loved everything about her, and his only sorrow was that he had never been allowed to make love to her completely.

Dar smiled as he looked down at his hands. It did not matter. It had been enough to have been in her company for so long, to have talked with her, trained her, educated her, and watched her blossom.

Chelan stirred, and Dar leaned forward, her soft moan jolting him back to dismal reality. She rubbed her eyes and then opened them slowly. Immediately, her face registered surprise as she looked up into Dar’s luminescent eyes. A warm smile traversed her lips.

Dar smiled back. “My Lady,” he whispered.

Chelan pushed herself up, hugging the blankets to her. “I’ve missed you so much,” she uttered longingly.

Dar felt his throat constrict, and he nodded to her. “As I have missed you.”

Chelan stared into his eyes, but slowly her smile receded. Stepping gracefully from the bed, Chelan drew a sheet about her tightly. Then she moved to the center of the room, her back turned to him.

Dar watched her, his words lodged in his throat. He stood.

Chelan turned to him, a small smile on her lips. “Fremma’s gone, isn’t he?” she whispered.

Dar’s heart nearly stopped. He immediately looked down. “Yes, my Lady.”

Chelan nodded and then took a deep breath. “And let me guess,” she ventured, her voice calm and quiet. “You will leave also.”

Dar flinched. “Yes, tomorrow.”

Chelan nodded again. Without uttering another word, she turned and headed into the wash area. She dropped the sheet and entered the shower. She closed her eyes and tipped her face to the raindrops. She knew that she was attempting to wash away Ticees before he ever touched her, and she knew that in the future, her life would simply be a day-to-day struggle for survival.

Chelan lingered for a while longer and then stepped out, drying herself methodically. She drew the sheet back around her and then walked into the bedroom. She looked at Dar, his back to her, his shoulders slumped. He had removed his shroud, and he was as still as death itself. She stepped up to him and touched his back gently.

Dar turned to her. He took a deep breath, and Chelan could see that his emotions were in disarray, his thoughts mired. Slowly, as if afraid to break her, he drew his arms around her cool body.

Chelan languished against his strong chest, his warmth spreading over her like a tropical sea of tranquility. Then she dared to look up into his troubled face, and she reached for him, her fingers gently touching his cheek. “You know that Ticees has now stripped me of all whom I love.”

Dar went to speak, but she pressed her fingers to his lips. “When Korba left, we fought, and I lost him in the throes of anger and depression.” A jagged spear of regret lanced through her, but she remained steadfast, a small tentative smile appearing upon her supple lips. “I don’t want to lose you in the same manner, my Lord,” she whispered.

Dar let his head drop, his long blonde hair falling about her.

Chelan continued to stare at him, and finally he looked back at her. Her deep brown eyes pleaded with his. She ran her fingers through his beautiful, thick mane and held him firmly. “Will you stay with me tonight?” she asked, her voice soft and low.

Dar’s eyes remained riveted to hers, and his throat constricted.

Chelan reached up slowly and tasted his lips with her tongue, feeling him tremble at her touch. “I love you so much, Dar. And I would like to make love with you, from now until the morning rips you from me.”

Dar squeezed his eyes tight. How ironic that he would finally be allowed to give back all that she had given him in the ultimate act of love, right before she would be cast into the depths of hell.

He opened his eyes and swallowed hard as his hands pressed her to him. “Nothing would please me more, my Lady,” he uttered hoarsely, “than to give to you the love I have always desired to give to you. Nothing would mean more to me than to taste of you throughout the night, and to make love to the only woman that I have ever loved so deeply.”

Chelan smiled, and Dar leaned forward, taking her lips tenderly. But his heart ached, his tremors betraying his grief, the moisture that glazed his azure eyes the ultimate confession of his torment. This was not how it was meant to be. Their ultimate bonding was to be one of joy and happiness, a transfer of love and passion born of desire and kindled by promise. This was a fusing brought about by desperation and imbued with impending loss.

But Chelan allowed herself to experience only the warmth and devotion his contact would afford. She would revel in his touch and drink in his body. He was going to be her last oasis in an all-consuming blackness, and she would not forfeit his love for any reason.

But suddenly, he released her and took a step back. He ran his hand through his hair as he pivoted on his heel and turned his back to her. All the air seemed to be sucked from the room at once, the void left behind straining his lungs as though he had been punched in the guts.

Chelan hugged herself as she watched him place his hands above his head on the wall. He leaned against it as if struggling for his very equilibrium. His head sagged between his shoulders, and she watched as doubt and sorrow infected his massive body. She knew exactly where his pain came from, but allowing him to walk out of the room and into the night was not an option she could endure. And in the end, she knew, neither could he.

She stepped up to him, noting everything that made him such a magnificent being, from his long silver-blonde hair cascading down his back, its molten highlights standing out from the inky blackness of his uniform, to his perfectly proportioned, seven-foot frame of masculine supremacy. But what really tugged at her soul was the unique bond they had always shared, a bond of fire and ice that lit the fuse between them and melded their minds and bodies. He was the catalyst that sparked a chemistry between them that nothing could quench. And to lose him now, without their ultimate union, was simply not a choice.

She slid her hands around his waist and leaned her cheek against his back. She felt him draw a ragged breath as he straightened, his hands surrounding hers. He let his head tilt back, his thick mane tumbling about her like a weighted veil. His voice was a baritone rumble. “I don’t know if I can do this.”

Chelan closed her eyes and bit her lip. “Yes, you can,” she whispered.

Dar’s hands clenched hers tighter. “To have all of you, to take all that you can give … and then to leave in the morning …”

Chelan hugged him harder. “The morning will come despite all, and we will be left with nothing but our memories. I know what will sustain me, my Lord. But you will have to search your heart right now to find what will nourish you through all the barren times ahead.” Chelan braced herself for his ultimate decision. “But, as with your people, I will not take what is not freely given.”

She paused, knowing that whatever transpired between them had to be palatable to them both, but a tide of disquietude threatened to swamp her resolve. “If nothing else, my Lord, I would wish that you lie with me. Just hold me throughout the remaining night. Nothing more must come to pass. But I need you with me, beside me.”

Dar was being crushed from all directions. He ground his jaw as his powerful mind sorted through the murk that was choking the life from within him. She was right. How would he face the dawn if he chose to abstain from her? He closed his eyes. He would feel utterly bereft. Yet to experience her so deeply, and then to leave …

Chelan hands moved up his chest, and as she rose to her toes, she whispered. “A
no
spoken at any time halts all.”

Her fingers drew down the center of his jacket, splitting the garment to his waist. Then she straightened from him, her fingers threading through his hair to the neck of the uniform. She began peeling it off his shoulders, watching his beautiful bronze skin emerge. He dropped his hands to his sides and allowed her to continue, and she eased it from him, taking with it his gloves.

Chelan let the jacket drop. She touched his back, and he flinched, but she continued. She ran her hands down the powerful cords of muscles on either side of his spine, her fingers reverently tracing each and every contour. Then she parted his hair again and stretched up, kissing the skin between his shoulders. Her lips tasted him as her tongue trailed down his back, her hands grazing down his arms.

Dar sucked in a deep breath, her moist touch sending shivers throughout his being. Then she held his wrists firmly as she started back up his flesh, savoring his skin and melting his soul. As she rose behind him, he could feel her hard nipples grazing him through the sheet, and his body flared.

Chelan released his wrists, her hands tracing over his hips to the front of his pants. She laid her cheek against his heated back as she began releasing him from his uniform. Then, placing her palms along his flanks, she pressed down over his muscular thighs, sliding his uniform with her as she crouched. As she slithered down his body, she pressed into the tops of his military boots, urging him to step out of them, and he did.

Chelan sank softly to her knees behind him, her kisses placed lovingly on the backs of his legs, her fingers slipping up his inner thighs. Then she licked a trail between his hard glutes as she slipped one hand between his legs and cupped him.

Dar moaned, feeling as though his knees would give way. As her tongue tasted the base of his spine and her fingers fondled his heavy male weight, his mind cleared and his senses erupted. His life’s blood spilled into his penis, and his balls clenched. She grasped him tightly as she reached around him with her other hand and touched his swollen organ. She slipped her fingers up to his tip and then gripped him firmly.

Dar looked down and stopped breathing. Slowly, she peeled back his foreskin, retracting him fully, ever so exquisitely. Then her hand returned to his exposed glans where she seized him and squeezed. Heat surged through him. She was going to be his, irrevocably, all of her, completely.

Like a man possessed, he reached for her arm, almost wrenching her out from behind him. She yelped with fright at his violent maneuver, but he was far from done with her. He drew her up and stood her before him, shoving her back against the wall. With another flash of movement, he tore the sheet from her body and captured her under her arms. His powerful hands lifted her effortlessly from the floor as he pinned her against the wall, her face level with his.

Chelan panted for air, her nails biting into his bulging biceps. His breath was hot, and his eyes glowed hotter. But he did not move further. He just stared at her as would a predator pondering his next kill.