Three Souls (11 page)

“Let me figure out how to handle this,” said Stepmother. “Old Madame Cha is very traditional.” She took a deep breath and folded her hands in her lap. “As your father says, it may all come to nothing, so please, Leiyin, don’t do or say anything. You’ve warned us, but hasty actions will only create more problems.”

“But shouldn’t we warn Father now?”

“Third Stepdaughter, please trust me in this.”

“Don’t fret, Leiyin,” said Gaoyin. “Stepmother will find a way through this.”

I nodded. We sat for a few minutes in solemn silence.

“Let’s talk about something else,” Stepmother said. “First Stepdaughter, when you were here for Sueyin’s engagement party, you came to me for advice. How is your situation now?”

My sister’s face flushed and she looked almost shy. “I did as you suggested, Stepmother. One of my servants has a sister who just had a baby girl. I hired the sister and she brings the baby with her. I spend a good part of each day with the baby. She’s such a darling. I can hardly bear to be away from her.”

“Good. Love the child as though she were your own.”

“Why?” I asked. “Why have you taken in a servant’s child?”

“Gaoyin is trying to conceive. I think her maternal essence needs help to flow more strongly. Sometimes fostering another’s child invigorates a woman’s essence.”

Stepmother laughed at my skeptical look. “It’s a cure passed down from my mother’s family. Continue your walk, my dears. I need to get back to the house.”

I held my tongue, but once Stepmother was well on her way around the lake, I shook my head. “That sounds like folklore, not science, Eldest Sister.”

“We’ve exhausted science, both Western and Chinese. This is a bit of folklore that does no harm. I enjoy having a little one in our home.”

“Is Shen so impatient for a son?”

She put her head in her hands. “It’s Shen’s mother. She wants him to take a concubine because we have been married three years already. She’s impatient for a grandson.”

“Shen adores you. He’d never take a concubine.”

“I like to think we’re a modern couple, but the truth is, he’s still totally obedient to his family. He’d take a concubine if his mother insisted.” Then her voice dropped to a whisper. “Oh, Leiyin. I can’t bear the thought of him with anyone else.”

“You’re First Wife. You’re allowed your say about concubines. Make Shen pick someone illiterate or ugly, someone he could never love.”

“I’m hoping Stepmother’s advice will let me avoid that. There. Now you know the truth. Your Eldest Sister is just a barren wife.” She smiled and wiped her eyes.

Tears welled up in my own eyes to see my imperious older sister so insecure, so vulnerable. Hanchin would never take a concubine if I proved barren. We’d adopt orphans, perhaps even one of those Eurasian children nobody wanted. Just thinking about Hanchin gave me courage. I took a deep breath.

“There’s something I want to tell you, Eldest Sister. A secret.” She looked up with a small smile, prepared to hear a childish confidence.

“I’ve decided to go to Hangchow, even though it’s against Father’s wishes.”

“Leiyin! You can’t! You’ve only just regained Father’s goodwill.” Exasperation replaced the smile on her face.

“All I need is money for room and board. And train fare. Will you help? I’m going to sell my jewellery but I’ll need to borrow more.”

“Third Sister! You can’t do this! Think what it would mean if you disobeyed Father.”

“It’s the boarding fees that cost the most,” I continued, as though she hadn’t said anything. “I could never come up with that much.”

“Leiyin, think what Father will do if you defy him like this.”

“Once I get to Hangchow Women’s, it’ll be all right. We all know how impulsive he is when he gets angry, but I won’t be around for him to punish. He’ll forgive me eventually. You’ve said often enough that Father is as quick to forgive as he is to get angry. Will you help me?”

She held my wrist in a tight grip and shook her head.

“You’ll be punished.”

“What can he do except drag me home? Once I’m at school, he’d lose face if he had to do that. He’ll have to go along with it or risk having people think he has no control over his children.”

“Third Sister, listen to me. You’ve always been his favourite daughter. But such outright defiance would be unforgivable.”

“Even if I get only one year at college, it would be better than none at all. Maybe Father will get used to the idea.”

Again she shook her head. She stood to leave. I jumped up and caught her by the hand.

“Please, Gaoyin. This means more to me than you can possibly imagine. My entire future, my happiness depends on it, Eldest Sister. You must help me.” For all my determination, I knew I could not do it on my own.

She saw my tears but didn’t waver. “I can’t, Little Sister. And I won’t.”

She clambered down the path and left me alone beneath the pines.

***

I suppose it was a good thing she left when she did,
I tell my souls.
I was ready to break down and tell her about Hanchin and why everything depended on university.

Gaoyin tried to warn you of the consequences.
My
yin
soul chews on the end of a pigtail.

My
hun
soul hovers at the edge of the terrace, gleaming.
You overestimated Eldest Sister’s capacity for defiance.

No, I didn’t. But I hoped. I had to try something, anything.
I insist, still feeling the sting of desperate tears.

It’s a good thing your first sister had the sense to refuse you,
my
yang
soul says. He paces around the terrace, hands tucked into his wide sleeves. He glances up at the sky.
Ah, a full moon.

We stand still, all four of us, and lift our eyes to watch the moonrise. I look for the rabbit in the moon, even though I know it’s only a fairy tale. I remember Gaoyin reading me the story for the first time, when I was Fei-Fei’s age.

She was always the bossy one with all the answers,
I tell my souls.
I couldn’t believe she was asking Stepmother for advice.

You always did underestimate your stepmother,
says my
hun
soul.

***

When the newlyweds paid their respects to Father during their formal Third Day visit, Sueyin wore one of the new suits from her trousseau, pale blue, with a little blue straw hat. Tienzhen’s striped necktie exactly matched the blue of her suit. We sat in the drawing room and a servant brought in refreshments served on our most expensive Limoges china, for now Sueyin was a guest, a member of the Liu family.

Changyin and Shen debated the success of the Nationalists’ most recent attempts to disband the warlord armies, while Tienzhen smiled politely.

“How is your esteemed father?” Father asked Sueyin in a formal tone. Judge Liu was now her father. The Liu family now owned her loyalties.

“My father is well. His health couldn’t be better.”

Then she turned to our brothers. “There’s a small theatre at the estate. Mother doesn’t like going out, so we watch films at home. We really enjoyed
Romance of the Western Chamber
the other evening.”

“It’s an excellent film,” Tongyin was quick to say. “Most excellent. Hou Yao is the most talented director in Chinese cinema today. How do you find his films, Second Brother-in-Law?”

Tienzhen nodded, more animated now. “I didn’t think he could do better than
A String of Pearls
but this one is truly a masterpiece.”

Sueyin stood up. “Please excuse me, Husband. I’d like to spend a little time with my sisters. When you’re ready to leave, just send someone to get me.”

Gaoyin and I followed her upstairs, where she opened the door of her old room and sat at the dressing table, now emptied of combs and creams. She gazed around at the walls, the panels painted in cream and gold, the leaf-patterned wallpaper, the pale blue drapes. We waited for her to speak.

“He’s kind to me. And he says he’s ashamed of his addiction. He’s promised to try to give it up. But I don’t believe he can. Let’s say no more about it.”

“All right then. What does he read?” I asked. “What do you enjoy in common?”

“He enjoys reading film magazines.”

Gaoyin pursed her lips. In our family, that made Tienzhen practically illiterate.

“He confides in me, I think. He talks a lot when we’re alone.”

Gaoyin put her arm around Sueyin’s shoulders. “That’s good, isn’t it?”

“He talks because I’m the only person who listens. His mother keeps to her rooms except when she plays
mah-jong.
For her, it’s enough that he comes when she sends for him.”

“But that estate is filled with family,” I said. “There must have been a dozen households at your wedding, all those aunts and uncles and cousins.”

“He doesn’t like them. The entire family lives off the Judge’s wealth. They flatter us and resent us.”

“Oh, Second Sister, this is worse than we could have imagined,” I said. “You’ll find no true friends there.”

“Second Sister, come to stay with me in Shanghai whenever you can,” said Gaoyin. “Bring Tienzhen with you, if you have to.”

A soft knock on the door, and we fell silent immediately. Stepmother entered.

“Your husband wishes to leave now, Second Stepdaughter.”

Sueyin stood up and nodded. I could almost see her stiffen with the effort.

We escorted Tienzhen and Sueyin to the main gate. Lao Li and the Lius’ chauffeur sprang to attention and the chauffeur pulled open the door of their motorcar with a white-gloved hand. Tienzhen held Sueyin’s arm as she climbed in. The car horn tooted, and the vehicle pulled out onto the street. Through the rear window we saw Tienzhen lean over to kiss Sueyin’s cheek. Then Lao Li pushed the gates closed again.

I turned back to the villa, but Gaoyin grabbed my hand.

“Let’s go for a walk in the Old Garden.” She put a finger to her lips as we turned away from the rest of the family.

Gaoyin marched at a pace more suited to leading an army, a grim set to her jaw. My leather pumps had low heels that dug awkwardly into the soft earth of the garden path, making it hard for me to keep up with her purposeful stride. She said nothing until we had climbed the path to the stone seats under the old pine tree.

Gaoyin paced before me, her expression unfathomable. I sat and waited.

“Little Sister, you deserve a better life. You must take the risk and follow your own destiny. Father gave me a bank account when I was married and I haven’t spent any of it. Go to university. I’ll help you.”

“Oh, Eldest Sister!” I leaped up and threw my arms around her. But she didn’t smile back.

“Do it for yourself, Leiyin. Do it for all of us.”

6

A
third cousin to General Cha arrived at our door with gifts and a proposal of marriage for Fei-Fei to the General’s eleven-year-old son. The intermediary was a diminutive man of middle age who bowed more often than necessary. When he smiled, he showed more teeth than was natural. He was visibly relieved when Father accepted the canisters of fine tea and admired the teapot and matching cups, fired from the famous
yixing
purple clay.

“Fei-Fei is my concubine’s daughter,” Father said, patting Stepmother’s hand. “She will deal with the rest of the formalities. In the meantime, please tell the General that we are honoured by this offer.”

“Very good, very good,” the cousin said, this time bowing to Stepmother. “Old Madame Cha would like you to meet her fortune teller, who will be casting horoscopes. Next week, perhaps?”

Stepmother bowed in return. “Next week.”

After the cousin left, I followed Stepmother to her room, almost bursting with anxiety.

“Don’t worry, Leiyin,” she said. “This will come to nothing.”

She looked very sure of herself. I had to trust whatever plan she had in mind. After all, Fei-Fei mattered more to Stepmother than anyone else.

***

Sueyin visited frequently, usually by herself and usually after lunch, when Tienzhen spent time with his pipe. She didn’t seem bitter, just relieved at the opportunity to get away. These visits were all too short, but we took advantage of the quiet hour to walk around the Old Garden.

“Are your in-laws kind to you?” I asked.

“For now, everything is fine. We’ve only been married two months. If I’m not pregnant by winter, Tienzhen’s mother will probably start feeding me fertility-enhancing soups. For the moment she’s happy enough showing me off to her friends. I’m her promise of beautiful grandchildren.”

“What about the judge?”

“He barely speaks to me. He vanishes into his study every evening. He just works all the time. But let’s not talk about my in-laws. Are things back to normal between you and Father?”

“They are. For now.”

Sueyin eyed me, her brows furrowed with anxiety. “Leiyin, what are you planning?”

I had to tell her.

“I’m surprised Eldest Sister agreed to help you,” she said after hearing me out. “But you must have been quite persuasive. Shen’s going to be very angry with her, not to mention Father. She’s risking a lot for you. And Leiyin, you know how Father gets when he’s angry.”

“Gaoyin and I are ready to face it. Second Sister, even if you don’t approve, I know you understand. I must take control of my own destiny.”

Sueyin gave me a long hug and a wistful smile. “Yes, you must. I don’t want you ending up like me.”

Then she stood, put her arm through mine, and said, “Come, I need to see Stepmother.”

Stepmother wasn’t in her room, so we went to the small sitting room that she used for receiving merchants. The door was shut. When we knocked, she called out for us to wait a few minutes.

When the door opened, a middle-aged woman emerged. She was stout and well-dressed, but not expensively so, in a short jacket of brown brocade over a brown
qipao.
Gold bangles clinked at her wrists and she greeted us with a nod that was at once friendly and appraising. We entered and Sueyin pulled the door closed again. The room was sparsely furnished, with a long polished table placed under the window so that merchants could display their goods under bright daylight. A black lacquered screen was the only ornament in the room.