Authors: Ruth Prawer Jhabvala
When the Rawul wanted to make contact with Grandfather, Michael and I decided that the best way was through Sonya. Although he had been a diplomat for so many years, there had always been something skeptical and aloof about Grandfather, which made it difficult to approach him; and after his heart attack, it became even more difficult, as though he had withdrawn a little farther from the world. Sonya was the oppositeâshe must have been in her late sixties by this time (no one knew how old she was), but she was still open to every kind of new enthusiasm, and when we phoned and told her about the Rawul, she gave a gasp and said she
must
meet him. I went with him to the city; I drove the car and he sat in the back so he could spread out and study his papers.
The meeting was an immediate success. Meetings with Sonya always were; she was so eager to be won over that she ran forward most of the way herself: literally, for although their manservant opened the door, Sonya herself came tripping up as fast as she could to welcome us. She was tiny, and the very high heels and high golden hairdo she wore didn't helpâshe had to stretch up with all her might to get as far as kissing my cheek. Actually, she liked to kiss right on the mouthâit was some Russian custom, I thinkâbut I had long since learned to turn my face aside at the right moment. She had a sumptuous tea ready, with every kind of pastry and cake she must have run out herself to select at Greenberg's, and she wore one of her flowered silk tea gowns that opened deep, deep down into a cleft. Grandfather was summoned from his study, and under her excited flutteringâshe appeared actually to be skipping around themâhe and the Rawul shook hands and looked each other steadily in the eye like two statesmen. I suppose there was a sort of historic ambience about their meetingâor would have been, if it hadn't happened to take place in Sonya's drawing room. I say Sonya's, for although the house had been given to Grandfather's parents on their wedding in 1898, after her marriage to Grandfather Sonya had managed to make it her own. The original sofas and cabinets and tables and bookcases were still there, but Sonya had overlaid them with her own taste and possessions: with fringed shawls, with rose-and-gold upholstery, and a whole heap of treasures dating from her traveling
days around Europe and the Near and Far East and her forays into Madison Avenue antique shopsâbut all of them, wherever they had come from, marked by a preponderance of gilt and shell-pink ornamentation.
It was an incongruous setting for Grandfather, but he didn't seem to mind. On the contrary, he loved itâno doubt because he loved her so much and was so proud and pleased with her; and all the time she talked and fluttered and fussed around, he watched her with a smile and look you wouldn't think someone like Grandfather could have had for anyone. Without her, I don't suppose he would have had much time for the Rawul and his movement and his inspirational style of speaking. However, he sat there listening patiently, one long leg stretched stiffly out in front of him, and he even took the trouble to nod from time to time as though he were listening, which he probably wasn't but was waiting for the polite moment to return to his study. Sonya was beside herselfâeverything the Rawul said struck chords in her, and she even claimed that, if she had been clever enough, she would have thought of something like it herself. She said she had always had this intuitionânot that she was an intellectual person or educated or anything, but she had traveled and seen a great deal, many many civilizations old and young, and it seemed to her that something like the Rawul's Fourth World was what humanity needed. “Oh wonderful, wonderful, marvelous!” she exclaimed often, clasping her small wrinkled hands with all her rings and squeezing Grandfather's arm to make him respond too. But he only sat there and smiled a little bit at her enthusiasmâexcept once, when he leaned forward keenly and made the Rawul repeat something he had just said.
This was about Lindsay, Michael, and me donating Propinquity. I was surprised myself to hear the Rawul refer to it so naturally, almost casually. There had been no reference to it for some time, which had been a relief to me, making me hope that the question had been shelved and with it the need for me to decide. But now I learned it
had
been decidedâanyway, the Rawul seemed to think so. And when Grandfather heard that, he turned to me and asked “Is that what you're doing, Harriet?”
Grandfather's eyes were the same as Manton's and Michael's: far-seeing seafarer's eyesâthough we don't come from seafaring stock at all but from Irish Protestant landowners whose younger sons usually became clergymen or went to India, except for our ancestor, who had come to the American colonies.
I hesitated while Grandfather waited, and the Rawul, smiling politely, also waited for me to confirm his statement. Fortunately Sonya rushed in with “And they say the young are not idealists! Darling, give Sonya a kiss!” She held out her cheek to me and I had to go over and kiss it. I tried to get away with brushing that creamed, rouged, and powdered surface with my lips, but she caught my face between her hands and firmly planted her mouth on mine, which made even Grandfather smile, along with the Rawul.
Sonya and Grandfather usually went to the house on the Island just before the Fourth, but this year they had had to postpone their visit because Grandfather's heart trouble had started up again. Now he said he was feeling perfectly well and was eager to get to the Island, where he loved to be. Only Sonya could have persuaded him to break their journey and pay us a visit at Propinquity; after meeting the Rawul, she could hardly wait to see the rest of the movement. Their reception was organized on a grand scale. The Rawul and Rani, with Crishi just a little way behind them, stood in welcome on the front porch and led them ceremonially into the drawing room. Here refreshments were served while everyone sat stiffly on chairsâthe Rawul and Grandfather on the principal chairs on either side of the fireplace, both of them bolt upright as for an official portrait. It was not unlike a state visit, with no conversation at all except for a few platitudes delivered into the glacial silence. Even Sonya knew to keep quiet. The Rawul and Grandfather, both of them born to state visits, easily assumed the formal dignity expected of them.
When it was over, we all reverted to our usual selvesâthis was something that had always surprised me during Grandfather's embassy days: how quickly everyone became normal again after going through some pompous official ceremony. Sonya tripped excitedly around the house, like one returning
to a childhood home, although she hadn't even visited us here all that often. She really was very sentimental. But it wasn't put on; she did feel that way and had tears in her eyes as she hugged everyoneâLindsay, Jean, Mrs. Schwammâand kissed them on the mouth. Michael was her very special favoriteâshe claimed that she understood him completelyâand she greeted him in what was for her a restrained manner, confining herself to standing on tiptoe and kissing his chin.
She saw at once that Crishi was someone very special too. She stood in front of him, looked up at him, and exhaled a sigh of recognition; perhaps they had met in some previous birth. Sonya was a believer in reincarnation and often came across people she had been close to in other centuries. She held his hand and turned it over a few times and nodded; I don't know whether she was admiring the shape or reading his palm. He took her in his stride, not putting himself out to charm her but just being his usual self. It was the Rawul who made the greatest effort to impress our guests. An hour or two before the usual evening session, he retired to his room, and when he emerged, it was as if he had charged himself with some new and powerful voltage. He had changed into his native dress and looked imposing in a long shiny tunic with jeweled buttons. And what he said that evening was more impressive, poignant, and more personal than his usual address, as if he had thought and felt it all out again from the beginning.
Once again he told us how his family, descending from the moon and passing through a series of semidivine incarnations, had established their earthly kingdom as far as the Caspian Sea on the one hand, and on the other into the Gangetic plains. His own ancestors, after surging as conquerors over Persia, had been driven back into Rajputana, winning and losing various kingdoms until finally cornered in a northwestern fastness of stony desert. Here they had built their fortress on a rock and defended themselves against all invaders so successfully that they were still there todayâthe oldest surviving kingdom in the world. They were no longer kings except in lineage; modern democracy had caught up with them. He was glad, the Rawul assured us, even proud:
To be part of the modern world meant more to him than all his ancient titles and privileges. However, he could not escape from or deny his own lineageâthat he was a descendant of a royal line so long that it reached back beyond antiquity to divinity: yes, to a time when the gods still walked on this earth, or rather, when there was not yet any division between this world and another, higher one. It was a thought that had haunted him as a childâespecially when he climbed to the roof of the old palace built on a rock, where he truly felt nearer to heaven than to earth. Such a child would have different thoughts from other children: A different light would shine in his eyesâand here he invited us to look into his eyes. Sonya, who was sitting right by him, did so and exclaimed at the way the Rawul's light-colored eyes contrasted with his Indian complexion. It came from looking up so much as a child into the sky, he explained, smiling, half-deprecating, inviting us to treat it as a joke if we wanted to. Grandfather said “Hm,” but there was no other comment, only a silence that I believe was rapt.
Whatever it was he had absorbed into himself up there in the rocky kingdom of the desert did not leave him when he was sent away to school in England: to Harrow, where his father and grandfather had gone before him. Remote and dreamy, he did not prosper in studies, sport, or any other activity. But already his vision was forming, strengthened now by his study of history and civilizations. He came to a conscious realization of everything that lay behind him and was in him: and it was at that time, as a schoolboy in cold damp Middlesex, that he came truly to understand his ancient lineage, his own place in the story of Man, and with it, the responsibility that place conferred on him. Technically, he was no longer a king; there were no more kings; the world today didn't want kings. What then did it want? the Rawul asked us (Grandfather said “Hm” again). It wanted, the Rawul told him and us, men who were prepared to be kings in spirit: not to conquer and rule kingdoms but, extracting what was best in each, to merge them into one great all-embracing kingdom of this world. This was his dream, he said. This was what had brought him to our shores, here into the heart of America: He looked around at all of usâLindsay,
Jean, Mrs. Schwamm, Michael and me, Sonya and Grandfatherâin the hope that we would share his dream and help to bring it to fulfillment. He would not deny that he stood before us as a man with a mission, imposed on him by his birth and kingdom. And if he himself was small and wantingâand he said he was, though he didn't look it at all, tall and plump, shining in silk and jewelsâhe invited us not to regard him as a person but as a world spirit seeking to express itself; and to look not at but beyond him, not at what he alone but what all of us together could achieveâand here he waved his hand at where the two flags hung side by side over the lake, and everyone looked up at them except Grandfather, who said “Hm” again.
Grandfather was sitting a little apart from the rest of us. We were as usual down on the grass, some cross-legged, some with our knees drawn up, facing the Rawul, who sat on a chair to address us. As a special courtesy to Grandfather and Sonya, two more chairs had been placed at the outskirts of our circle opposite the Rawul. Grandfather made no fuss about occupying his, but Sonya wouldn't dream of itâshe at once placed herself in the front of our group and even managed to get into a cross-legged position. Seated thus, her hands folded in her lap, she looked up at the Rawul, ready and eager to be inspired. Grandfather, although directly facing the Rawul and on the same level with him, did not look at, but away from him, across the lake; only sometimes he shot him a quick glance from under his brows, before at once resuming his faraway gaze over the water. The Rawul appeared to be addressing him more than anyone else, but I wasn't at all sure that Grandfather was listeningâexcept for the times he said “Hm,” though that too might have been at his own thoughts; he often did that, commenting to himself in his own mind.
Afterward he asked to speak to Michael and me. He came up to Michael's room. It was strange to see him thereâI mean, I was used to seeing Grandfather at some great carved desk under the American eagle, not having to perch on the edge of Michael's narrow bed; but there was no chair, only the bare floor where Michael and I sat side by side listening to him. He asked us were we sure about donating Propinquity.
Michael said yes at once, but added that I hadn't made up my mind yet. I felt a bitâI don't know, weak or mean-spirited, in the face of his absolute certainty. But it was always like that: Michael strong and certain and looking straight ahead, while I vacillated and saw all sorts of obstacles right and left preventing me from making up my mind. And when Grandfather turned to me, to ask what held me back, there was nothing definite I could say; and Michael spoke up for me, that I still needed time to think. When Grandfather asked him was he sure that he had thought enough, he said of course; and when Grandfather persisted, he became impatient and asked had Grandfather ever known him not to be absolutely certain, and Grandfather had to admit that no, he had not. Then there was a silence between themânot a hostile one, but because Grandfather respected Michael too much to attempt to argue with him. It had been like that ever since Michael was little. Even at that time he had been very definite and decisive in everything he thought and did, and Grandfather treated him as though he were absolutely equal in experience and authority with him. Grandfather loved him very, very much and was proud of him: perhaps also in reaction to Manton, of whom he wasn't proud at all, and I'm afraid he didn't love or even like him either; it was a great relief to him to have a grandson as different from his son as Michael was from Manton.