Threader (29 page)

I start to wonder what the hell is going on, because I suddenly realise there's more happening here than me just getting into trouble.

Eckhart gives me a crooked smile. ‘Josie, I told you the work your parents did on the Ciliary Gate project was revolutionary and yes, some of it was dangerous. When I asked you about following their work, you voiced reluctance. Naturally, I understand. But what I didn't explain to you was that had that project succeeded, the Helios Academy would have been a new superpower. Bigger than any mega corporation. We would have been the shepherds of the next stage of mankind, carving the future of humans worldwide.'

‘The Ciliary Gate was a disaster,' I point out, thinking this big solution isn't sounding so hot. ‘Surely you can't expect me to help you with a project that killed people.' I pause, then add, ‘My parents were responsible for those deaths and like I told you, I'm sure they wouldn't want me to continue their work.'

‘What happened was an accident,' Eckhart corrects me. ‘Try not to judge them too harshly. No risk taken, no reward given.'

Aaron interjects quickly. ‘And I've been working with Director Eckhart, trying to revive the Ciliary Gate. The disaster twenty years ago won't happen again. I can guarantee it.'

‘I wouldn't even know how to help you,' I say.

‘You already have the answers in your mind,' Eckhart says, and I can tell he thinks he can convince me, knows what I'll do to keep my place at the academy. ‘Your intuition is all we need, just like the trick box, or how you dealt with the Skymmer android. Your instinct is your strength.'

‘I don't want to do this.' I can barely get the words past my throat. I might be a lone wolf like Bobby, but I'm also feeling very wounded and worried. Desperate, I point out the obvious. ‘Last time I threaded, I hurt Archer. Maybe my thread isn't stable enough.'

Aaron shakes his head. ‘Archer's talent was the one that wasn't stable. It was just bad luck. Anytime we've threaded, the bond has been rock solid.' He reaches over and takes one of my hands. He's trying to look sincere, but it's marred by a hungry gleam. ‘Trust me, Josie. If we pull this off, you'll have the world at your feet.'

I pull my hand out of his, my mouth dry. ‘I'd like time to think.'

‘Of course,' Eckhart says. ‘However, I can't afford you too much time. We both expect an answer by tonight. It would be a shame if you were to be sent home to your old life, where we cannot help you. No other corporation will take you after what you've done here. At best, a government agency would scoop you up.'

Or I'll be arrested. Third strike
.

Aaron goes to follow me when I stand, but I stop him with a frown and he sits back down. As I hurry from the office and back outside, Eckhart's threat rings clear in my head. Suddenly, I get the distinct impression I'm a chess piece Eckhart has been herding to a position he's wanted me in all along.

The sun is warm on my face outside, and I take a moment to collect myself. My head echoes with Eckhart and Aaron's offer. A chance to redeem myself. A
dangerous
chance to redeem myself.

My slate beeps and I see it's Bobby again. I take the call and his craggy face appears on screen. It takes me a second to process the fact that he's wearing a hospital gown.

‘What's wrong?' All thoughts of Aaron, Eckhart and the Ciliary Gate are wiped from my mind. ‘What happened?'

‘Don't pull that face,' Bobby growls. ‘I'm fine. Just a small issue with the ticker. The Box-Doc gave me a ticket for the hospital this time, for an operation. Thought I'd better tell you, in case they screw things up when they operate.'

‘What?'

‘Don't worry about it,' Bobby says. ‘I'm gonna be fine. But you know what it means when you're a non-Citizen. On the off chance something goes wrong, I wanted to let you know. Just in case I kick it. Don't want them wiping my slate clean, like I never existed. I've sent you the registration number they've given me here, in case something happens and you need to find out.'

Spots dance before my eyes and I remember to breathe. ‘I'll get on the first suborbital back.'

‘Negative. I want you to stay there,' Bobby says. ‘You hear me? Operation's in an hour, so there's nothing you can do, anyway. I'll call you when I'm out and you can visit me when you get a break.'

I want to ask how he thinks I can concentrate when his condition has been diagnosed by an unfeeling robot and will be operated on by an uncaring doctor. I want to confess about everything that's happening. What I've done here. But the words won't form and I know I can't burden him. A great weight presses down on my shoulders and causes my knees to weaken.

Bobby looks off-screen, then back at me. ‘I gotta go. But I want you to know I'm proud of you. You were right about Helios, and I was wrong. Getting this education is what's important. Getting a better life, like you always wanted. So I want you to stay strong for me and I'll stay strong for you. One lone wolf to another, right?'

‘Right.' My hands clutch tight around my slate's smooth handles. ‘I'll be seeing you soon though.'

‘Love you, kiddo,' Bobby mutters, then his image winks out. I stare at the screen, now filled with a rotating Helios logo, feeling lost and very alone. I tell myself I'm just going for a walk to clear my head, but I'm not surprised when my feet lead me once again to Blake's residence.

There's no answer when I knock, and it unnerves me how much I need to see him. How much I've been watching for him, wondering when I'll see him next. I turn to leave, when the door opens suddenly.

Blake stands there, shirtless. He's breathing hard and is covered in sweat, his hands bound in wraps. In the light, I can read the tattoo scrolled across his tanned skin.
I had a dream, which was not all a dream.
It sounds like the beginning of a poem, but I don't know it.

‘Josie.' Blake looks past me, as if expecting someone else to be here. His eyes come back to me and I swallow hard.

‘I need to talk to you,' I manage.

He steps aside and I cross the threshold of his room, savouring the familiar smell of him, even if it is soaked with sweat. Afraid I'll fall down, I sit on the edge of his bed and don't realise I'm crying until I taste salt. Blake crosses the room in three long strides and crouches beside me, his warm hands on my knees, his face concerned.

Between sobs, I tell him about my uncle's operation, then confess everything. What I did for Olivia. What happened to Archer. What Aaron and Eckhart want of me. Finally, exhausted, I fall silent. Blake rubs his scruffy jaw with a thoughtful look, saying nothing at first.

I wrap my arms around myself, as if that can hold me together. ‘Maybe my talent is just a horrible curse. After all, look what I did to Archer,' I whisper. ‘This is why James wanted to keep me hidden.'

‘That's not true,' Blake says sternly. ‘Don't you ever let anyone else tell you otherwise. Your talent is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.'

My heart lifts before I realise he's talking about my talent, not me.

There's a faint scent of cologne about him, reminding me of open water, and I just want to bury my head in his shoulder. But I can't, because there's nothing there for me. No real acceptance. What's between us is nothing more than a fabrication of intimacy. Blake sees the look on my face and stands, walking over to his punching bag. My whole body sags a little, like it had been moving towards him for support and now there's nothing to prop me up.

‘Did you feel it?' I find the courage to ask. ‘When the lock was broken?'

He begins unwrapping his hands. ‘I felt nothing.'

‘Oh.' My voice is small. ‘I thought I heard you reading to me in medical, so I figured maybe you knew what had happened. That maybe you'd felt … something.'

Blake turns back, his face horribly blank. ‘What difference does it make now?'

‘I guess it doesn't.' I'm suddenly embarrassed. He's right, it doesn't matter. What matters is that I sort this mess out, then fly home to see Bobby.

Blake thrusts a hand through his short dark hair. ‘Josie, listen … what Aaron and Eckhart are asking from you, it doesn't sound right. Let me check out a few things before you say yes.'

‘They made it sound like it was my last chance with Helios.'

‘I just don't know.' His voice is a low growl. ‘I've known men like Eckhart before. He only wants what's best for him, at all costs. And Aaron's ambitious enough to ignore common sense when it suits him.'

I make a frustrated sound and get to my feet. ‘What choice do I have?'

Blake's eyes flash with sudden anger. ‘Then do it, if you've already made your mind up. What does it matter what I think?'

My hands clench in fists. ‘I can't believe for a moment I actually—' I stop before I can embarrass myself. Blake's eyes narrow.

‘You actually
what
?' he asks.

Anger pulses through me, giving me the courage to stride over to him. Surprised, he takes an uncertain step back. I come in close to him, suddenly bone-weary from the desperation that has dogged me since discovering the lock. With it gone now, I realise all I want is to have it back. Because I've never felt so lonely as I feel now, even when I'm threading with Aaron.

I reach up to cup his face. Blake flinches, but doesn't move away. His chest rises and falls, quicker now. I stroke the edge of his cheekbones with my thumbs and stare at his finely shaped lips, the dark stubble peppering his jaw.

‘I miss you,' I whisper. ‘And I feel so alone now.'

As if the truth has scorched them, I drop my hands and walk away. I hope he'll call out to me, but hear nothing but a deafening silence, and I know I've made a terrible mistake in confessing my true feelings to him. That the lock seeded this longing inside of me, then flowered into something more, something that makes me feel safe and whole. My heart gives a painful thump and a feeling of hopelessness swamps me. Even if Blake had confessed to have similar feelings, we'd been warned to stay apart and I was in no position to disobey Eckhart's wishes.

I race outside the building. Breaking the thread was supposed to be a fresh start for me. Was supposed to be what I needed. But instead, I feel I've lost something so precious it makes my heart throb with emptiness and sorrow. And if I'm thrown out of Helios, then I will have lost everything. I can't even imagine how disappointed Bobby would be. The thought makes me ill.

Arriving back in my room, I pull out my slate and message Aaron, typing two words:

I'm in.

My mind made up, I try to relax. But I'm too distracted to study and I keep looking at Aaron's reply, which instructs me to wait in my room until someone from his team collects me later tonight.

After the sun goes down, I find a few old protein snack bars in my rookie pack and devour them. My stomach cramps from the food at first, but I feel better after drinking some water, and the headache that's been nagging me recedes. I watch the news and am surprised to see nothing about Archer's rampage. I wonder if the Galloway name has managed to smooth out the damage from the wrecking ball Olivia swung in her less-than-great revenge plan.

Around ten, there's a knock at my door. I've been watching the news with the sound off and my limbs complain when I get up to open the door. I'm surprised to see Vogel there. She holds two coffees in paper cups—the Helios logo stamped on the lids—and passes me one.

‘Hey honey. Eckhart sent me to get you.'

‘What for?' I ask cautiously.

Vogel sips her coffee. ‘The Ciliary Gate, sweetheart. I've been doing consultant work with Eckhart on this project. Seems you're the big key to the gate problem, you know?'

As we emerge from the building into the night, I relish both the hot drink and Vogel's act of kindness. The greens are deserted and we quicken our step as a light rain sprinkles over us.

‘How long have you been working on the project?' I ask.

‘About eight years.' Vogel glances around, making sure we're alone. ‘Eckhart finds threaders and I test them. He was pretty damned excited when you showed up, let me tell you. Any threader we'd used in the past couldn't get into that blasted thing. But Eckhart seems convinced you'd know how.' She gives me a rueful glance. ‘I worked with you for weeks, but I couldn't get a peek of much inside of your mind. You're all locked up tight, Josie Ryder.' She pauses, grinning. ‘Except maybe for a few dirty thoughts about a certain dark-haired slider.'

I clear my throat, not anxious to start chatting about Blake. ‘What about Aaron? Have you been working with him as well?'

‘Sure. But the Ciliary Gate is Eckhart's baby. Aaron got attached five years ago, after the money started to dry up. As I understand, Aaron's invested quite heavily in the project, probably because he sees it as his big chance to make a name for himself.'

‘And this project is on the level?' I ask. ‘Eckhart got approval to work on it, even after the damage it caused last time?'

Vogel shrugs. ‘Look, to be honest, I'm not sure the Executive Board knows exactly what he's doing.' She yawns, then rubs her temples with a grimace. ‘But you can be sure that they'll try and take the credit when it starts working.'

‘Are you okay?' I ask Vogel.

‘Yeah.' She drops her hand, rolls her neck. ‘Just tired.'

I notice we're heading towards Central. ‘Where are we going?'

‘One of the D-levels,' Vogel says. ‘Where they keep all the relics and failed projects.'

‘I've been down there before,' I tell her.

‘Eckhart calls it his church.' She sighs. ‘Always with the dramatics, that man. He thinks he's going to change the world.'