Thirty-One and a Half Regrets (31 page)

“I told you. I was scared of how you’d react.”

His anger rose. “What on earth did you think I’d do? Get mad at you?
Shout
?”

“No, but Joe’s family has already done enough damage to yours. I didn’t want you to get involved.” My voice broke. “I didn’t want your career to be hurt any more than it already has with Savannah.”

His face softened. “Rose.”

“I know what Joe’s father is capable of doing, Mason. And I knew that you wouldn’t let him get away with any of it. Joe’s father got you transferred to Fenton County. He got me out of jail when you and Joe couldn’t. I can’t even imagine what he’d do to you if you tried to fight him.”

“Rose, that’s my job.”

“I couldn’t risk it, Mason. You mean too much to me.”

He reached around me and pulled me to his chest. “Do you realize that this is what Joe’s visit to your nursery was all about? His father was dangling you in front of Joe to remind him of why he needs to behave.” Mason paused and inhaled deeply. “Rose, as long as J.R. Simmons sits on this information, you’re forever in limbo, just waiting for Joe to step out of line. You can’t live like that.
I
can’t live with that.”

“I know, but I don’t know what to do.” I looked up into his face. “I’m scared for you if you try to intervene.”

“And I’m scared for you if I don’t.” He pressed a kiss to my cold lips. “Let’s get moving. Once this whole Crocker mess is taken care of, we’ll find out exactly what J.R. Simmons has and figure out how to refute it.” I started to protest, but he put a finger on my lips. “We’ll do it so quietly that he won’t know what hit him until it blows up in his face.”

It was no use to argue and I relished the thought of being free of the threat.

“But no more secrets. Tell me if you’re in trouble. Your safety will always supersede my anger. Okay?”

“Okay.”

We trudged along for what seemed like an eternity. My legs chafed from the wet jeans clinging to my thighs and my toes were still numb and throbbing, but I felt warmer moving and my sleepiness had faded. “How far do you think we’ve gone?” I finally asked, desperate for the end to be in sight.

Mason paused, picking his way around a pile of rocks. “It’s hard to say since walking in the woods isn’t like walking down the street. It takes longer to get around the obstacles—”

“How far, Mason?”

“Maybe two miles. Heading east first took some time and distance.”

My heart sank. “And you think it’s ten miles to the border? And then how far until we find a house?”

He slowed and took my hand in his. “I don’t know. If I remember the terrain correctly, the forest is dense along the border.”

I was tired and freezing, but stopping wasn’t an option and complaining wouldn’t do any good. “Okay.”

“I’m hoping we’ll find something before too long,” Mason said, scanning the trees in front of us. “If we can’t find a home with a phone, maybe we can find an outbuilding where we can warm up.”

“I’d rather just keep going.” I didn’t want to sit around and wait for Crocker to find us.

“You can’t feel your feet and neither can I. It would be smarter to stop.”

“Well, we’ll have to find someplace first and we’ll never do it standing here. Let’s go.”

The snow had started and stopped in fits. But it was heavier now and the sky was beginning to darken. Mason picked up the pace. “With the sky this overcast, we’ll be stumbling around in the dark on uneven terrain before we know it. With this terrain, that could be dangerous.”

We had been staying on high ground to lose Crocker in case he picked up our tracks, but we began to descend, hoping to find some sign of civilization. We finally reached a valley with overgrown fields. The snow had begun to accumulate and about an inch covered the ground. There were several clustered buildings in the distance. Hope soared in my heart. A farm. But it soon became apparent that the place was deserted.

As we approached the dilapidated-looking house, Mason lifted his rifle but kept the tip pointing downward. “Rose, walk behind me.”

His change in stance turned my blood from cold to icy, and I did as he requested. “Do you expect any trouble?”

“No, but we’re in the hollows of southern Arkansas and this place might be remote for a reason. It’s better to be safe.”

One thing was certain, the house had seen better days. The wood porch was rotten and several windows were broken.

When we were within twenty feet of the house, Mason stopped. “Hello!” His voice echoed in the valley. “Anyone here? We need help.”

“Do you really think there could be people inside?” I asked in a low voice. The barn behind the house looked to be in worse shape.

“Who knows? It’s remote and deserted. Squatters could live here without running the risk of getting caught.”

“But the house looks like it’s about to fall in on itself. Wouldn’t they fix it up?”

“I guess that depends on how long they planned on staying.”

The wind swirled the snow on the ground and I shivered.

He called out again. “Hello! Is anyone home? We’re lost in the woods and we need to call someone for help.”

No one answered.

Mason climbed the four steps to the porch, stepping over one loose board and around a hole. He knocked on the screen door, which was hanging from one rusty hinge. When no one answered he opened it and turned the doorknob on the front door. It gave without him needing to apply extra force and he stepped halfway through the doorway, calling out to possible residents.

I stood at the bottom of the steps as he disappeared inside. Moments later, I heard a high-pitched cry. “
Mason!
” I shouted.

He appeared in the doorway. “It’s okay. I disturbed a cat. I think the only squatters are a few stray animals.”

I made my way onto the porch and through the front door, letting my eyes adjust to the dark room. The house was empty except for a kitchen chair with broken spindles and a couple of cross-stitched pictures on the walls—
There ain’t no lovin’ like country lovin’
and
Possum—America’s dark meat
. After I read them, I understood why they had been left behind. We wandered to the back of the house. The kitchen was ransacked—half the cabinets were missing and the doors of the remaining ones were hanging open. Most of the light fixtures were gone.

“What happened here?”

“Probably a foreclosure. The owners realize they’re losing everything so they take anything they think they can sell.”

I couldn’t imagine being that desperate.

“Let’s check the rest of the house.”

We moved to the second floor and I was surprised that the staircase was in such good shape. We found three empty bedrooms and a bathroom that was missing the toilet, sink, and light fixture.

Mason stood in the hallway, taking in the upstairs one more time. “This seems like a good place for us to stay the night. We can rest and warm up and set out first thing in the morning. Unfortunately, we don’t have any food, but I do have a bottle of water in my bag we can share.”

I nodded. “I guess we could use that broken chair to build a fire in the fireplace. And there might be more wood outside.”

“We can’t build a fire, Rose. Let’s not give Crocker’s men any reason to investigate this place.”

“But they think we went south.”

“They’ll figure out we didn’t soon enough, and then they’ll fan out and look in other directions. Sure, it seems like finding us would be like finding a needle in a haystack, but we left footprints in the snow. We could be leading them straight here.”

My breath caught. “Then we might as well build a fire and get warm, right? If they might find us anyway?” Now that I’d thought of building a fire, I couldn’t give up the chance to get warm. “It’s not like we’re the only people who would build a fire on a cold, snowy night. There are other houses around. We just haven’t found them.”

“True…” He was wavering.

“Will they keep searching for us in the dark?”

He shook his head. “I’m not really sure. It would be difficult, and under normal circumstances, I’d say no. But we both know Daniel Crocker is anything but normal. Still, even if they look, they’ll be more likely to miss our tracks in the dark.”

“So let’s build a fire right after the sun sets and let it die out before we go to sleep. I don’t want to spend the night shivering and starving. We might not be able to take care of the starving part, but at least we can get
warm
.”

He stared into my eyes.

“I’m frozen, Mason. I’ll have a better chance of moving faster tomorrow if we warm up.”

“You have a point.” He kissed me softly.

I smiled against his lips. “So I get a fire?”

His gaze turned serious. “Do you think I could ever deny you anything?”

My smile faded. “Yes, if you thought it would protect me.”

He wrapped his arms around my back and pulled me close, kissing me so intensely that I had to cling to him to stay upright.

He smiled down at me. “Let’s build you that fire.”

The unheated house was cold, but it was still a shock to go outside into the bitter wind. Mason suggested I stay inside, but I didn’t want to be separated from him.

We found kindling at the edge of the tree line as well as some bigger branches, but we had to search high and low for something to start the fire. Finally we found a kerosene lantern and a book of matches in the barn, along with three wool blankets. They stank to high-heaven, but they were warm. I was sure our noses would adjust.

The kerosene lantern helped as we fumbled with the fireplace. Mason had busted the one kitchen chair into pieces, but it was slow to burn, the damp branches even more so. We sacrificed one of the stinking blankets to use as tinder and finally we had a roaring fire.

I spread the two other wool blankets on the floor and slipped off my soggy shoes and set them in front of the fire. My stiff jeans followed. I doubted they’d be dry by morning, but at least they’d be less damp.

Mason sat on the hearth and turned to watch me undress.

I shrugged. “We’ll warm up faster if we take off our damp clothes.”

He nodded, his eyes burning.

When I dropped my jeans to the floor, he picked them up and laid them on the hearth by my shoes. I’d already shed my jacket, so I lifted my shirt over my head, kneeling on the blanket in only my bra and panties.

Mason quickly removed his clothes too and reached for the blankets we’d taken from my farm. He pulled me into his arms, and we lay on the blankets, our limbs intertwined. I slipped my toes between his calves. “Your feet are freezing,” he teased.

I lifted my eyebrows in mock reprimand. “Someone made me walk in a creek.”

His smile faded. “I’m sorry about that.”

“It worked, right? That’s what counts.” I tucked my hands between his arms and his chest and he jerked backward out of reflex before settling in.

“I was sure Crocker’s guy was going to find us on that bluff. It’s a good thing he was sloppy or we’d be dead.”

I licked my chapped lower lip and Mason’s eyes followed the movement. “We can’t let him catch us.”

“I have no intention of letting him.” His arms tightened around me. “I didn’t just get you to lose you. God wouldn’t be so cruel.”

But God had been cruel to me for most of my life. What would stop Him in this?

I lifted my mouth to Mason’s, kissing him gently until a low sound hummed in his chest. He rolled me to my back, his mouth becoming more insistent. I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling the blanket to cover his exposed back.

He tipped his face up and stared into my eyes, the fire casting a warm glow on his face. “I feel like I’m failing you. I can’t help but wonder whether we should have headed for the road.”

“Mason, we both agreed to this plan. And I have no doubt that if we’d gone to the road we’d be dead or worse.”

“I’m supposed to protect you.”

“Who says? Why can’t we protect each other?”

His kissed me with urgency, as though Crocker might show up at any minute and take me away from him. After we made love, we lay in each other’s arms, still warming up with the heat of the fire. I soon drifted off to sleep.

When I awoke later, Mason wasn’t next to me and the fire was a pile of glowing embers. I bolted upright, clutching the blanket to my chest.

Mason stood next to the window, his rifle slung over his shoulder. Moonlight filtered through the glass, lending a soft glow to his face. He turned to face me when he caught my movement.

“What are you doing?”

“I couldn’t sleep, so I’m keeping watch.”

I leaned forward to look up at the sky through the window. “The moon is out.”

“The storm is breaking and the moonlight is fading in and out.” He looked worried. “We didn’t get much more snow, so our footprints from the woods to the house are like a neon sign.”

“Do you have any idea what time it is?”

“No, but if I had to guess, I’d say around three.”

“You said they probably wouldn’t look for us in the woods at night. Let’s get another hour or two of sleep and then take off at sunrise.”

He hesitated, but I reached my hand toward him. He gave the window one last glance and then moved toward me, crawling under the blanket fully clothed. The moment he touched my skin, I squealed. “Take off your clothes! They’re cold!”

“You’re just trying to get me naked, Rose Gardner.” He laughed and pulled off his shirt. “You are a wicked woman.”

“And you like me that way.” I kissed him and reached for his zipper.

“I had no idea how wicked you could be,” he groaned, shimmying out of his jeans and kicking them off.

I pushed him on his back, straddled his hips, and gave him a saucy grin. “Let me show you.”

When I woke a couple of hours later Mason was already up, back at the window. The sun had just begun to rise as I dressed. We on the front porch and I realized Mason had been right about our tracks. While the snow hadn’t accumulated much, it was wet and heavy and our footprints were like a giant arrow pointing toward us. Mason scooped snow into our empty water bottle and put it in his bag.