Therapy (6 page)

For some reason, the thought of hating Jace or him hating me breaks my heart a little. I have a lot of regrets, but things ending badly with Jace might be a regret that I’d never recover from. It scares the hell out of me. My lungs expand as I take in a deep breath before answering his invitation.

“Sure, Jace,” I reply simply.

His expression goes from hopeful to happy as soon as he hears my answer. “All right, then. You can meet me there in about half an hour. Go grab your suit and head over. If you text me, I can text back with the address.”

An address is not necessary—everyone knows that he lives in a gargantuan mansion of a house just outside of town.

“I know where you live. I think everyone knows where you live, Jace,” I say with a hint of sarcasm in my voice.

He rolls his eyes and keeps spinning that damn toothpick back and forth across his lips. It’s incredibly sexy, and I wish he would stop it.

“Jess? Are you with me, or are you going to keep standing there admiring the view?” he says with a flirty laugh.

I start to respond, but my voice seems to have left me. My attraction to him is causing me to act like an absolute idiot. God, I’m in trouble here.

One of his eyebrows arches and draws my eyes to the blue in his. Then he drops his head a little, so he’s looking right at me. “Do you wanna stand here all day or do you wanna come over and get your butt smoked in a race?”

I straighten my shoulders and raise both brows at him. Is he seriously challenging me? I may be quiet, and I may be a loner, but I am a damn good swimmer. I can hold my own against most, even guys.

“Are you challenging me, Jace Collins?” I ask.

“Yep! That’s exactly what I’m doing. Why? You scared?” he asks with a little chuckle.

I want to be excited about his interest in me, about going to his house and hanging with him, but knowing those pictures are probably going to fall into his hands very soon, I can’t help but feel a little apprehensive. Not to mention I’m mortified that those bitches took things this far, yet again. I don’t want him to see my weak or broken side again, though. He has seen plenty of that Jessica.

“Nope, not scared. Just worried about your ego is all,” I retort.

“My ego?” he says, obviously intrigued by my comment.

“Yep, because after I beat you it will be all sorts of bruised. I hope you can recover from that, being the star athlete that you are and all. I’d hate to mess with your mojo!” I say, taunting him. My mouth turns up into a slight smile and I realize that for the span of our conversation I have actually felt kind of normal for once. Two minutes of feeling like any other girl just because of some playful banter.

Interesting.

“There’s a little smart-ass inside that shy personality you fool everyone else with, huh? You don’t fool me, Ms. Alexander, but I’ll gladly let you try to bruise my ego—even though it ain’t gonna happen. See you in thirty.”

He pulls that damn toothpick out from between his teeth and walks away, glancing at me over his left shoulder one last time before climbing into his truck. I exhale, realizing I barely took a breath the entire time he was standing here. My skin feels flushed and my heart is racing. I pull open my car door and practically tear out of the school parking lot toward my house. I pull into the driveway, get out of the car, and plow through the front door to my room.

“Heeeey, sweetie. How was school today?” Mom asks, slurring her words and letting me know that Martha is long gone today.

“Good, Mom. Just great,” I say before shutting my door behind me and locking it.

I strip out of my school clothes and yank open my dresser drawer, searching for my swimsuit. I see the red material stuffed in the bottom of the drawer and pull it out. It’s a Nike Fast Back suit and I love it. I grab my swim team bag, which has my Speedo goggles and swim cap, and head out the door. I’m going fully prepared, determined to kick his ass.

I pull up the long driveway at Jace’s house and instantly feel the nerves ripple through my body. His mom is used to him being with someone like Elizabeth. She’s everything that I’m not. Elizabeth is like a bright and shiny expensive toy while I’m plain with no bells and whistles. My family doesn’t have loads of money or a membership to the local country club. I’m not the type of girl she’d want around her son.

The double garage door starts to open, revealing a very hot Jace. He’s in regular swim trunks and a white tank top, grinning that mischievous smile that’s steadily growing on me. I’m wearing my suit under a vintage Beatles T-shirt and black board shorts with black flip-flops on my feet and my hair pulled back in a high ponytail.

“You ready to get blown out of the water, Jess?” he smirks.

Every time he calls me Jess I light up inside. He could say nothing else from here on out and I’d be happy with just that. I give him a timid smile and sling the strap of my bag over my shoulder.

“I’m ready, Mr. Collins. Let’s see what you’ve got!”

I follow him along a stone walkway that winds around the side of his giant two-story brick house, and we approach a wrought iron fence and gate. He reaches over and unlocks the latch, and as we step around to the backyard area I nearly gasp.

It’s absolutely freaking beautiful!

The pool is huge, just like he said, with a Jacuzzi area and an amazing waterfall that cascades water down into the pool. The deck area is adorned with beautiful plants, flowers, and fancy outdoor furniture. There’s a fire pit and a big seating area adjacent to the largest stainless steel grill I’ve ever seen.

I scan the area further and see a breathtaking pergola with ivy vines intertwining through it, perched above even more outdoor furnishings. It’s like a little hidden piece of paradise back here. If I lived here, I’d never need to go on an actual vacation. He has a vacation spot in his own backyard!

“Damn!” I say, realizing too late that my inner thoughts just came out of my mouth.

He smiles knowingly. I mean, c’mon, even he has to know that this place is badass as all get-out.

“I take it that you like the pool,” he says.

“Ummm, yeah, I love it. Shit, Jace, why do you ever leave your house? If I lived here I’d never leave!”

He shakes his head as he reaches down and curls his fingers under the edge of his tank top, pulling it up over his toned abs and chest, and then, finally, over his head.

God, this guy is fine!

I avert my eyes so the fact that I’m practically panting over him isn’t so obvious. He tosses the tank top onto a poolside chair and stretches, raising his arms up over his head.

“It’s nice out here, I agree, but things aren’t everything you know. Sometimes too much gets to be, well, too much.”

I have no idea what he means by that, but I get the feeling there’s a hidden meaning there somewhere. I don’t dare ask, but I’m beginning to think that there’s much more to Jace Collins than meets the eye. A splash snaps me out of my deep thoughts as he dives into the water. I set my bag down on one of the chairs and pause for a second, suddenly feeling anxious about undressing in front of him.

Everything feels different when I’m around Jace: exciting but unpredictable, hopeful but uncertain. I can’t explain or figure out why it should be any different with him. He’s just a guy. Guys are, for the most part, all the same. So what makes this one stand out?

Who are you, Jace Collins?

I don’t know, but I think I want to find out.

I carefully pull my T-shirt off and bend over, pulling my shorts down. Goosebumps scatter across my skin, and my heart is pounding in my chest. The very fresh memory of my clothes being stolen earlier today is almost impossible to push back. Adrenaline starts to course through my veins at the memory, but I force myself to stop thinking about it as I reach in my bag for my goggles and cap. I’m pulling them out when Jace starts talking to me from across the pool.

“You brought your goggles and cap?” he asks, sounding sincerely surprised.

I hold my index finger up, my goggles dangling from it, my cap in the other hand.

“Of course I did. Why? Don’t you compete using goggles and a cap?”

He leans back against the pool, propping his elbows up on the side and pressing his lips into a hard line. Did he think I wouldn’t come prepared, ready to take him down? He certainly underestimated me, which is not surprising.

“Well, I guess I didn’t think you’d come all guns a’ blazing. You must really be worried about me beating you, huh?” He laughs as he pushes off the side of the pool, going under the water and swimming toward me.

His head emerges from the water just below where I’m standing. He looks up at me, squinting from the sun that shines bright upon his face.

“Well, get your ass in here so we can do this thing. I can beat you, cap or no cap, goggles or no goggles. I’m sure you need all the help you can get, so you use whatever gear you think is necessary, Ms. Alexander.”

I open my mouth and start to respond, but he reaches up and grabs my left leg just behind the knee, pulling on me. I try to pull back out of his grasp, but he tugs harder.

“Hey! Let go of me!” I screech.

“Nope, you’re stalling,” he says, yanking one last time.

I crash into the water and my skin prickles under the abrupt coldness. Holding my breath, I swim down deeper in the opposite direction of him. I open my eyes under the water and glance back to see that he’s right on my tail. Anxious energy jolts through me and I go faster until I reach the far side of the pool, pushing up above the water and sucking as much air into my lungs as I can. I feel the ripples of the water increase as he swims up beside me.

“Almost! I almost caught you, but you had a head start,” he shouts playfully as he slaps his wet hand against the side of the pool. “I didn’t know you’d bolt on me, so don’t be thinking that was any indication of whether or not I can beat you.”

He runs his hands through his wet hair and shakes it in a shaggy-dog style. He’s adorable. Adorable, sexy, masculine, and sweet.

All rolled into one.

His closeness makes me feel uneasy but needy at the same time. My breathing starts to even out and I quickly wipe the dripping water from my face, because the chlorine is making my remaining scratches burn something terrible. With my movement, a shooting pain races across my ribs and I wince a little at the intensity of it.

“Do they still hurt?” he says. His smile fades some and his blue eyes darken, overshadowed by his creased brow. He seems remorseful about what happened to me, but if it wasn’t for him there’s no telling how long I’d have laid out there in the dirt and gravel. I smile at him, securing my invisible mask tightly into place.

“They’re fine. I’m not hurting that much anymore. I’m fine, really. No worries,” I say nonchalantly, shrugging my shoulders and making light of it as much as possible.

He reaches up and ever so softly traces my cheekbone. My breath hitches and I nervously look away from his stare. I nearly whimper at the absence of his finger as he removes it, but then he gently places it under my chin, tilting my face back up so that we’re practically eye-to-eye.

An overpowering energy circles around us. He moves in closer and his arm goes around to the small of my back, pulling me into the warmth of his body. My mind’s reeling as my eyes flit back and forth between his eyes and his lips. His breathing becomes more rapid, and my chest starts to rise and fall in unison with his.

Is he going to kiss me?

Do I want him to kiss me?

The answer comes instantly.

Yes, I want him to kiss me!

My lips part as we stare at each other for what seems like an eternity. I close my eyes and lean in, wanting to let him capture my lips with his. Suddenly, his arms stiffen and he abruptly pushes me back, putting space between us.

My eyes snap open in surprise. He’s looking down with a grimace on his face. He looks pissed off. What did I do? I thought he wanted to kiss me. He pulled me into him, so I followed his lead. What... I’m embarrassed and completely humiliated.

Run.

Run away from the situation; that’s what I do. Something goes wrong and I run away. I push my hands down hard onto the side of the pool, attempting to hoist myself up out of the water, but I feel his hands grip my hips, stopping me. I drop back down into the water and stay perfectly still, even though everything inside of me is going crazy right now. I don’t turn around. I can’t. I have to avoid any and all eye contact; avoid whatever the hell just happened between us. He leans forward and I feel his breath on my neck.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers.

Nothing more, nothing less. Just “I’m sorry.” We stay there for a minute longer, my back to his front. He leans his head forward and rests his forehead against my wet hair.

“I’m sorry, Jess. I shouldn’t have done that. I don’t want you to think that I’m just trying to get laid, because I’m not. I’m not Harrison or any of those other worthless, piece-of-shit guys. I want to be your friend, so I shouldn’t have almost crossed that line. I’m really sorry.”

The heat from his breath continues to assault the delicate skin on my neck with every word he speaks.