Then Came Indecision (Southern Love #2) (13 page)

“No, you will listen to me.” He grabbed her arms and pinned her to the door.

“Don’t touch me!”

He moved his hands to the door. “Alexandra—”

She moved under his arm and escaped to the sidewalk. “Your lies may work on your other girls but they don’t work on me. Just drop it.” She ran down the sidewalk but he chased after her.

“I’m not letting you get away.”

She sprinted into the crowd and ran for her life. She wasn’t sure where she was going but she had to get away from him. People glanced at her with worried expressions as she passed. When she thought she would get away, Blaise cut her off. He dragged her between two buildings and pinned her to the wall.

“Let me go!”

He held her firmly. “I’ll release you when you calm down.”

She squirmed under his grasp.

“I have all day.”

When she tried to knee him, he pushed his body against her.

The sensation was too similar. The night of the party came back to her mind. Gabe pinned her to the truck, holding her back. She was unable to get away. The trauma clouded her mind and she started to sob uncontrollably. Gabe’s hands grabbed her, ripping away her clothes. Her heart almost exploded from the adrenaline.

Blaise’s eyes widened and he released her.

Alexandra fell to the ground and hugged her knees, becoming as small as possible. She concentrated on her breathing, trying to return to calm. It was just a panic attack she could control if she tried hard enough. She buried her face in her arms and cried to herself.

Blaise’s eyes burned with tears while he watched her. “Alexandra, I didn’t mean to scare you. You know I would never hurt you.” He touched her arm but she pulled it away.

“Please go away.”

“Please listen to me.”

“All you do is keep hurting me. I can’t take it anymore, Blaise.”

“I haven’t been hurting you. Let me explain and you’ll see.”

“No…”

He took a deep breath. “When Danielle slept with me she had a boyfriend. He wasn’t too happy when he found out. Instead of coming after me, he came after her. He beat her so bad she was in the hospital for three days. I kindly returned the favor, bringing him to an inch of his life. His need for revenge hasn’t sated. He’s still after Danielle, but I’m the only person who scares him. I have to pretend to be with Danielle so he’ll leave her alone. That’s why she was living with me. She just moved out a week ago. I told her I would still protect her but I can’t sacrifice my life and happiness for it. You’re everything to me, Ale
xandra. That’s the truth, in its entirety. The only reason why I didn’t tell you is because we had to keep up the charade, which wouldn’t work if everyone in town knew. I haven’t done anything with her since you and I got together. I swear on my parents’ graves.”

She continued to breath heavily, her face buried.

“Please say something,” he whispered. “I’ve told you everything. Don’t you see I’ve been loyal to you this entire time.”

“You kissed her.”

“It was an act.” The tears burned under his eyes. “It didn’t mean anything.”

She leaned against the wall, tears still streaming down her face. Her breathing
had slowed, and a dark calm settled over her. Everything between them was a lie. Even now, she couldn’t tell what was real and what wasn’t. She thought Blaise was hers but he never was. The heartbreak finally came to a halt. She refused to accept any more pain. “Blaise, we’re done. Please don’t call me, don’t come to my house, and don’t bother me ever again.”

The tears spilled form his eyes. “Alexandra, please believe me. I’m not lying!”

“I can’t believe anything that comes from that mouth anymore.”

He gripped his scalp. “It’s the truth.”

“Knock it off.”

“I’ll prove it to you.”

“There is no proof,” she said quietly. “Everyone says you’re together.”

“Danielle, she’ll tell you.”

“Why do I doubt that?” She looked away.

“She
will if I ask her to.”

“Blaise.”

He took a deep breath.

“We’re done. I won’t change my mind.”

More tears fell down. “No…don’t do this. I’m not giving up.”

“Do you love me?”

“Fuck yes.”

“Then please let me go.”

“No! I didn’t do anything wrong. I’m the victim in all this.”

She closed her eyes. “Please let me move on. This was all a stupid mistake. You’re obviously a player, and a good one.”

“That isn’t true,” he snapped.

She rose to her feet. “Chase me if you want, but it will be pointless. But don’t bother my family or my friends. I mean it, Blaise. Go back to your life with Danielle. I’m moving on with mine.”

He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to his chest.

She pulled away. “Look at me.”

He looked into her eyes, the tears still falling. He was breathing deeply, ragged.

With a steady voice and lifeless eyes, she said, “I’m done.” She stepped away and moved out of the alley, not looking behind her. She heard Blaise give into the sobs and fall to the ground. She didn’t turn around as she walked to her car, feeling numb and empty. When she got to her truck, she sat inside, her heart beating dangerously
slow. She didn’t know where to go, who to run to.

Alexandra drove back to the house but she didn’t walk inside. Instead, she went into the loft and sat in the dark. It was a place she made many memories with Blaise. She thought about each one before she decided to forget them, never allow
herself to think about him. She was surprised no more tears fell. She was more surprised that Blaise hadn’t come after her.

“Baby?”

She stilled at his voice. “I’m up here.”

He climbed up the ladder then looked at her. “What’s wrong?” he said immediately.

She took a deep breath. “Blaise…”

He came beside her. “What happened?”

“I saw him with his girlfriend…kissing her…holding her. He lied to me the entire time. I can’t believe I ever thought he might be telling the truth.”

Paul grabbed her hand. “I’m sorry.”

Alexandra stared at her feet.

“I really am. I knew I was right, but seeing you in pain doesn’t give me any joy.”

“I know…”

He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and held her close. “It’ll be okay, baby.”

“I’m done with him.”

He kissed her forehead then rested his face close to hers. “Please don’t let this destroy the part of you that I love so much.”

“My ignorance?” she scoffed.

“No,” he whispered. “That innate part of you that hopes for the good in everyone.”

“What the hell do I know? You cheated on me, Blaise was cheating on me the entire time, I fucking killed someone.”

“Whoa…you did not kill someone. Saying it over and over doesn’t make it true. And I didn’t cheat on you, not really. I never had a relationship with this girl or feelings, not like Blaise at least.
Don’t lose that belief in people. I may have made a mistake, but there’s no doubt that I’m madly in love with you and would never do something like that again, no matter how bad you treat me.”

Alexandra stared across the warehouse but didn’t really see anything, just shadows and corners.

“It’s late,” he said. “Let’s go to bed.”

“Okay.”

He helped her down the ladder and they walked into the house. Paul grabbed her and kissed her on the forehead. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” she whispered. Like a zombie, she walked into her bedroom and put on her nightshirt. She wasn’t tired, too depressed to close her eyes. She never felt more alone in her life. She tossed and turned but couldn’t fight the pain she felt.

Eventually, she left her room and walked into the living room. Paul was lying on the couch, his eyes closed. He was shirtless, sleeping in his boxers. She stared at him for a moment before she cuddled beside him. There wasn’t much room so she had to lay on him.

He stirred at her arrival. He looked at her but didn’t say anything.

Alexandra clutched him tightly then closed her eyes.

“There isn’t much room out here,” he whispered. He sat up and cradled her in his arms before he walked down the hallway and into her bedroom. He placed her on the bed before he crawled beside her.

Alexandra wrapped her entire body around him, finding comfort in the heat and strength of his body. Nothing was said but the protection was still there. His hand moved through her hair, trying to calm her.

“You’re always safe with me, baby.”

His final words put her to sleep.

Chapter Seventeen

Alexandra was too depressed to wake up early to attend to the fields. The cotton would survive without water for the day. She lied in Paul’s arms, feeling his chest against her back. She didn’t want to move or live her life. She wanted to stay there forever.

Paul kissed the back of her neck then her shoulder. “Don’t you have class, baby?” he said with a deep voice.

“No.”

“I think you do.”

“I don’t care,” she whispered.

He kissed her shoulder again.

She turned over and pressed her face close to his.

He stared at her then kissed her forehead. “You look beautiful in the morning. I guess I just forgot how much.”

Alexandra ran her hand down his strong chest, feeling the strength in his body. The tattoo was mesmerizing. She could stare at it all day. His boxers hung low and his erection was prominent under the fabric. She looked away when she realized she was staring.

Paul adjusted himself. “Sorry…it happens every morning.”

Her cheeks blushed. “It’s okay.”

He ran his hand down her arm and across her stomach. She was just wearing a t-shirt and underwear but she didn’t feel unc
omfortable around him. His hand slid down her legs, feeling the smoothness. “I love your legs.”

“Thanks.”

He leaned down and kissed her inner thigh.

She felt her heart accelerate. The intimate touch rekindled the desire she felt. Her depression was still there but slightly numbed.

He came back to her then settled next to her. “Are we shacking up in here today? Because I don’t mind if we do as long as we have food and water.”

“That sounds nice,” she said with sigh.

“Then let’s do it.”

She wrapped her arms around his neck and snuggled next to him.

His arm linked around her waist and held her close. His erection pressed against her. There was no way for him to hide it in his thin boxers. “Let me make you some breakfast.”

“I’m not hungry,” she said sadly.

“Not even for Mickey Mouse pancakes?”

She smiled. “We don’t have a skillet for that.”

“I’ll figure it out,” he said with a smile.

“I’ll help.”

He got out of bed and dressed himself. When he turned around and pulled down is boxers, Alexandra glanced at his ass. It was hard and defined. She caught herself staring before she looked away. She put on her clothes then they walked outside.

Martha was sitting at the table, reading the paper. She raised an eyebrow. “Good morning.”

Alexandra didn’t care what her aunt thought of her. “Morning.”

Paul turned to her. “We are making pancakes. Would you like some?”

“Sure, dear.” Martha watched them work in the kitchen. “Sleep well?”

“Really well,” Alexandra said as she glared at her.

“Why do I suspect you didn’t do much sleeping?”

Paul smiled but didn’t respond.

Alexandra rolled her eyes.

She and Paul made pancakes on the skillet. After many attempts at making mouse ears, the cakes kept turning into misshaped figures. When one looked like the shape of Italy, they laughed hysterically then gave up.

They came to the table and ate their pancakes and eggs. Martha sipped her coffee. “Not working in the field today?”

“No,” Alexandra said. “I’ll do it tomorrow.”

Martha nodded.

Paul placed his arm over the back of her chair while he ate. “Have you considered selling the property?”

“No,” she said without taking her eyes away from the paper.

“You’re going to have to figure out something eventually,” Alexandra said.

“I’m fine,” Martha said.

“You’re always welcome to live with me and Alexandra in the city. It’s very different from Georgia but I’m sure you’d like it.”

“That’s very sweet but no thank you.” She sipped her coffee.

Alexandra sighed. “You’re so stubborn.”

“Your head is just as hard,” Martha snapped. “When are you leaving, by the way?”

“Leaving?” Alexandra asked.

“If you’re sleeping with Paul, I assume that means you’re together? So wouldn’t you go back to New York now?”