The White Wolf (Half-Breed Book 1) (17 page)

Jin stared at Varg, then sighed and said, “I thought the enchantments on the cell would be enough to hold you. Apparently I was wrong.”

“You're damn right you were,” Varg said.

“Don't make a fuss Varg. I wouldn't want to see what happens to Milea and the rest of your friends if you were to disobey,” Jin said.

“You won't get to them until my corpse is the only thing in your way,” Varg threatened.

Jin laughed. “You have nerve, Varg. I could use someone like you.”

“Not a chance,” Varg spat.

“You really shouldn't pass judgment before you even know the entire truth,” Jin said.

“I know that you're harming people, and that itself is enough to convince me you aren't to be trusted,” Varg spat.

“Then it comes to this,” Jin answered. “Here we are again, facing each other at the ends of our blades. I wonder, will this be a repeat of our previous battle, or will I hang your bloody head from my mantle?”

With Milea's weak condition, Varg knew he couldn't risk getting her hurt in a battle with Jin. Moreover, he knew that with Jin's power he had no way of winning at this point, and his primary goal was to get Milea and see that the rest of his friends escaped the hideout. He hoped that Oliva, Tain, and the others made it outside and had word sent to Conley. Then perhaps the battle would start and keep the rest of the cultists busy. There was still Jin, of course, and Varg knew that the Serpent wouldn't leave them alive before tending to the other battle. At the end of the day, Varg had to think of some way to escape before the Serpent decided to bite.

Jin brandished his long blade and stepped forward. “Are you prepared for death's sweet embrace?”

Varg realized he had no choice but to fight. He gave a quick nod to Milea, who nodded back and backed away, then he held Frost Fang forward and said, “Only if it means I take you with me.”

Varg took a deep breath, knowing fully well that he could die this night, and charged to meet the Serpent. Jin in turn heaved forward and their blades met. The grinding of metal screeched and caused Varg's ears to nearly pop, but the half-blood didn't falter and swung his blade to the side. Jin parried and countered with a slash of his own, which barely nicked Varg's cheek.

Varg soon went on the defensive and never took his eyes off the Serpent. Jin swung his blade with incredible speed, and Varg barely held his own as he held Frost Fang up to block. Jin knew Varg was becoming weary and thus pushed even harder and faster in an effort to break his defenses.

Just when Varg's arms nearly collapsed under the weight of the brutal attacks, a deafening roar from below caught everyone's attention and caused Jin to stop his assault. Cultists were shouting desperately in the upper levels and when Varg focused his ears, the distant sound of clashing blades echoed throughout the stone walls. Varg allowed himself to breathe, for he knew now that Conley was beginning his assault and that the Shadow Hand would soon fall.

Jin apparently understood what happened, but instead of reacting with anger or fear, he merely shook his head. “Conley, Conley. Why must you always make things harder?”

“It's over Jin,” Varg barked.

Jin laughed again. “Thousands have fallen before me. Countless armies have bent their knees to my will, and you think this one has a chance of stopping me?”

Milea suddenly appeared by Varg's side, weak but standing strong. “Your fortress is under fire and your men will die by the drones. Do you honestly think you stand a chance?”

“A fortress is simply stone. Stone can be rebuilt. There are plenty of other strongholds that house the Shadow Hand throughout Fellen, so destroying this one wouldn't even put a dent in our operations. The Shadow Hand always stands strong,” Jin replied.

It was then that dozens of cultists came pouring into the room as if they were awaiting their master's words. Not a single man wasn't armed and waiting to strike at a moment's notice.

“My Lord,” one of the cultists said, “the Count's men are attacking the fortress. We came to protect you.”

Jin smiled. “I thank you for your loyalty, but I believe I have everything under control.”

The cultists faced Varg and Milea with their weapons drawn. Varg despised running from battle, but Milea's safety was more important than his pride. The question now was how to get away when their only exit was blocked.

Jin smiled again, then said, “There's no where left to escape, Varg.”

Then Varg remembered what the cultist whose conversation he overheard said.
The only place to escape is through the window.
Varg's mind went back to the moment he first saw it from outside, where a waterfall poured out from underneath into the river below. Even if they jumped and landed in the water, a fall from that high would make them land in the river like they were landing on stone. If Varg was quick, however, there was a chance he could lessen the fall. Given the circumstances, he had to take the risk.

Varg took a deep breath, then he sheathed Frost Fang, at which point Jin said, “Very smart. Now step forward and await your fate.”

Varg looked straight into the eyes of the Serpent, and said, “I decide my fate.”

Before Jin could respond, Varg lifted both of his hands and sprayed an icy mist onto the ground. The mist became solid and formed a wall of thick ice that grew from the floor to the ceiling before anyone could react. The cultists charged at the wall and tried in vain to cut through the solid ice, at which point Varg turned to Milea and asked, “Do you trust me with your life?”

Without any hesitation, Milea answered, “Yes.”

“Then hold onto me and don't look down,” Varg answered.

Varg acted quickly and wrapped his arm around Milea's waist. With his free hand, he drew Frost Fang and smashed it through the window, which left a whole large enough for the two of them to fit through, and replaced the axe on his back. He then lunged through the window into the night air and began their descent from the highest peak of the Shadow Hand fortress. As he looked to the river below, Varg focused all of his energy into his palm and the waterfall bent to his will. A long strip of ice formed from the falls and stretched all the way down to the shore. In midair, Varg twisted his body so that he landed onto the ice first, and he and Milea slid down the slope. When they were almost at the bottom, Varg used the heels of his boot to slow their descent. He landed onto the shore without damage and the two tumbled into the dirt.

Once they stopped, they lay on their sides facing each other. Varg opened his eyes to see Milea still in his arms with her face buried in his chest. The rising dust from the disturbed dirt choked them both, but once they stood up and brushed themselves off, they both realized they'd escaped serious injury.

To Varg's surprise, Milea began to laugh. “That was insane.”

Varg shrugged. “What can I say, I'm good at improvising.”

Milea embraced him again and replied, “I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't shown up.”

“I promised I would come for you, and you know I don't break my promises,” Varg said with a chuckle.

After they walked up the hill from the river, Varg and Milea came face to face with the rest of their friends.

“You made it!” Oliva shouted.

“Barely, it seems,” Tain remarked, seeing their dirty and torn clothing.

“We saw you falling,” Catrina gasped. “I never thought I would see anything as amazing as that ice magic.”

“When Uncle Conley began his assault, we were worried that you wouldn't make it out in time,” Oliva said. “I'm so glad you're safe.”

“I'm just glad the rest of you managed to escape too,” Milea said.

“Do you need to rest, Milea?” Varg asked when he noticed her trembling.

Milea shook her head. “I'm all right. Let's just wait for Conley.”

Despite her insisting, however, Varg removed his fur cape and wrapped it around her shivering shoulders.

Varg and Milea made their way to the camp with the rest of the Ironbarrow soldiers and sat around a campfire. Catrina insisted that they eat something, and they were happy to oblige. They ate some stew and stared at the fire in silence.

Varg finally broke the silence. “Do you feel better?”

Milea nodded. “My strength is returning.”

“What exactly happened?” Varg asked suddenly.

Milea placed her spoon in her empty bowl. “I thought he drugged my tea at first—don't look at me like that, he wouldn't stop pestering me until I drank some—but the strange look in his eyes made me think that he used some kind of mind manipulation to warp my sense of judgment.”

Varg swallowed a large gulp of stew. “Do you think he does that to all of his followers?”

“It's possible, because just before it happened he asked me to join the Shadow Hand,” Milea said.

“What would he want with you?” Varg asked.

“He wanted me to convince you and the others to join the Shadow Hand, but he still didn't tell me anything about their reasoning or what they're even after,” Milea explained.

Varg sighed. “So we still know nothing.”

Just then Varg looked up to see Conley walking toward them. Varg's blood boiled, but he managed to stay calm and place his empty bowl on the seat beside him and stand up without reaching for Frost Fang in the meantime.

“Varg . . .” Conley said.

Varg lost the battle with himself and let his fist fly right into the Count's jaw. Conley fell onto his back and sparked a reaction from every soldier around them.

With blades drawn, they moved in to arrest Varg, but Conley threw his hand up and said, “Stand down.” Catrina ran to her husband's side and helped him to his feet. Varg looked proudly at Conley's bloodied lip. “I suppose I deserve that.”

“You're damn right you do,” Varg spat.

“I don't ask for forgiveness, Varg. You would do the same for the ones you love,” Conley replied.

Varg shook his head. “I know what it's like to have everything at stake, Conley. I also know that you always have a choice. You didn't trust us to help you, and that's why you sold us out. Despite what you may say or do, you will never have my trust again.”

“Don't think you can judge me for being dishonest when you've been lying to me since we've met,” Conley growled. “I received the urn with Lionel's ashes while you were gone along with the bounty for his murderers, a man with white hair and an Elvish huntress. I also received word of two similar suspects and a child being responsible for Oliva's kidnapping.”

Varg figured he should have know Conley would find out the entire truth sooner or later, so he decided to clarify every detail and didn't care if the Count didn't believe him. He huffed and then began, “Lionel was killed by Edric Greenwood. He set up Milea to take the blame and hired me to capture her and bring her to face execution. When I discovered her innocence, I was blamed too and we both fled Rivershire and began finding clues to clear our names, and that's how we got involved in all this. As for the incident at Balik, the headmistress sold Oliva out and allowed the cultists to kidnap her from the school. When we intervened, she called the guards and blamed us.”

Conley shrugged. “I haven't know either of you long, Varg, but I know you weren't involved. You wouldn't have come this far and gone to great lengths to help us if you were responsible, but at the very least you could have told us the truth.”

“Likewise,” Varg spat. Then he sighed and added, “Perhaps it would be best if we just went our separate ways and forgot about each other?”

Conley sighed. “No, we need to stay together to fight the Shadow Hand, Varg. My men searched throughout the entire stronghold, but Jin and several cultists escaped somehow, so this threat is not over. From here on out, though, we
must
be honest with each other, no matter how the truth may sound.
”

“Very well,” Varg concurred.

With that, Varg marched back to Milea, who stood by the fire, and walked away with her to sit and collect his thoughts in peace.

CHAPTER 16

IRONBARROW'S CASTLE WALLS did nothing to prevent the chill from reaching Varg's wet skin as he stepped out of the bathtub in his bed chamber. The chill meant nothing to him, of course, as he dried and dressed himself. Several things tugged at his mind. On the one hand, they still knew nothing more about the Shadow Hand save for the fact that they had heavy influence throughout Fellen and that Jin could somehow control minds in order to get what he wanted. Yet their motives and ultimate goal still eluded Varg. He worried again about Milea and though he didn't tell her, he wondered what “betrayal” Jin referred to. He decided that if nothing else, he wished to see how Milea was handling this situation.

After Varg was fully dressed, he marched to the door and opened it only to find himself face to face with Lady Catrina.

The Lady still had her hand up, apparently ready to knock on the door, but she lowered it and said, “I'm sorry to interrupt you, Varg.”

“It's no trouble. Do you need something?” Varg asked.

Catrina caught her breath, cleared her throat, and answered, “Yes. May I come in?”

Varg stepped aside and gestured for her to enter. Once she had walked inside, Varg closed the door behind her.

Catrina walked up to Varg and smiled.

“I wanted to properly thank you for helping me,” Catrina said.

“It's what I do,” Varg replied.

“It was more than that, Varg,” Catrina assured. “Without you and the others, Conley never would have been able to lead such a daring attack. Perhaps you and the rest of your friends could forgive Conley for his deed?”

Varg sighed, for he should have seen this coming. “Maybe someday, Catrina, but it's too soon right now.”

Catrina said nothing, but looked to the floor as she walked over to the window to stare at the approaching night. Without turning around to face him, she then said, “Varg, did you know that there is a law here in Fellen that allows a Count to end his marriage should his wife be unable to bear him an heir?”

Varg didn't know where she was going with this, but he simply answered, “No, I didn't.”

Catrina turned to face Varg. “Many things can be said about Conley. He's stubborn, ignorant, and quite short-tempered, but regardless of his shortcomings, he's the man I love. You can imagine my elation when I discovered a short time after our wedding that I was carrying his child. Conley was especially overjoyed, and when he heard the news he ensured I had everything I needed to be comfortable and he made every plan to welcome our child into the world.

“However, one night I awoke in horrible pain. Conley lifted our sheets and to our horror, he found blood soaking our bed. Over the next several weeks, he brought countless doctors to our castle, but all of them sadly informed us that the baby was gone. In the years that followed, I never became pregnant again despite constant praying and trying. The doctors determined that I was barren at that point, and they advised Conley to end our marriage.

“Conley would hear nothing of it. He told them that if I could not give him an heir, then he would die without one. They called him a fool, an oaf, and a hopeless dreamer to think that having the woman he loved by his side no matter what was more important than preserving his family's bloodline.”

Catrina smiled and wiped a tear from her eye, then continued, “Varg, no matter what mistakes or foolish choices Conley has made, all of it comes from his unyielding capacity for love, kindness, and courage. He has never been popular among other nobles because of his idealism and zest for justice, but I wouldn't trade him for anyone else. I know what he did was wrong, but please believe me when I say he had the best of intentions.”

Varg said nothing in response to Catrina's revelation. Instead, he simply sighed and nodded.

Catrina smiled and walked to the door. “Please just think about what I said?”

Varg nodded again, and Catrina left and closed the door behind her. He gave her a few minutes, then he too left through the door to find Milea's room.

Milea stepped into the shift Catrina had loaned her and walked barefoot to the bed. Though it was barely nightfall, she still felt exhausted after her confrontation with Jin. She couldn't understand how he knew the things he did, and what's more she could still feel her head swimming after what he did to her, whatever it was.

A sharp rapping at the bedroom door startled Milea. Though she wore nothing but the shift, she was far from the modest type and called, “Come in.”

Milea was surprised to see Varg step through the door.

Once he saw her revealing attire, he quickly averted his eyes and muttered, “I'm sorry, I didn't mean to—”

Milea shook her head. “I'm not ashamed.”

Varg hesitantly looked her way again. After she gave him an assuring nod, he walked over to her and sat on the bed next to her, “Did you need something?”

“I wanted to see how you were feeling,” Varg said.

“That's kind of you,” Milea replied with a smile.

“I'm only sorry that I couldn't keep you out of harm's way,” Varg said.

“It wasn't your fault to begin with, Varg,” Milea whispered.

“Even still, I felt responsible for everyone in our crew. I feel it was my job to protect you all,” Varg replied.

Milea smiled and shook her head. “You risked your own life to save mine and the lives of everyone else. You even saved Conley after what he did. You proved yourself to be quite the hero that night.”

Varg lowered his head. “I'm no hero, Milea. I have dark memories that still haunt me to this day, and thought I've done whatever I can to repent, I still can't forget it.”

“Like what?” Milea asked.

Varg shifted in his seat, then he began,
“You remember the day I told you the tale of how pirates attacked the merchant vessel I worked for and left me to die? Well after I washed ashore I had nothing left, no money, no family, no friends, so you won't judge me too harshly when I tell you what I resorted to in order to survive.”

“You became a thief?” Milea asked.

Varg shook his head. “Worse, I became a bandit. There is a fine difference between a thief and a bandit. A thief acts with precision and stealth to snatch the items he wants while keeping his blade clean and not harming a soul. A bandit, on the other hand, is a cutthroat who plunders and kills to get what he wants. I fell into a group of such thugs who offered me a place to stay in exchange for doing a few jobs for them. For someone like me who couldn't find anyone else to give him the same mercy, I felt I had no choice but to comply. It started with me just sharpening their blades and handing out their food in drinks, to more field work like raiding carts and shops. I made a few kills that I'm not proud of, but at the very least we never harmed any unarmed civilians. That all changed the day our leader, Cyrus, led a raid into a small mining village.

“We ordered the civilians to huddle into a group in the middle of the village, but not before separating the men from the women and children. After we'd obtained just about everything of value from every building, Cyrus ordered the men to be killed, the children to be locked away, and the women to be brought to our hideout, and I'm sure I don't need to tell you why. At that point, I started to wonder why such violence was necessary, but it wasn't until the other bandits began to slit the throats of every man there—right in front of their loved ones—something in me snapped. I knew it was wrong, I knew
all
of it was wrong, and I finally grew the courage to stop it. I drew my weapon and began to attack every one of the people I once knew as my friends. I didn't stop until they were all dead except for Cyrus. The women and children ran as Cyrus and I faced off one on one in a death match.

“We kept the battle going well into the night, and it seemed that neither of us would give in. We were both weary and struggling not to make any foolish mistakes, but fortunately it was Cyrus who slipped up first. He lunged for an attack with his blade, and as I dodged to the side I could see that his arm was exposed, so I swung at it with all my strength. I meant to simply break his arm and render him useless in combat, but I actually severed his arm entirely. He screamed and bled out, but instead of finishing him quickly, I simply walked away and left him to bleed to death. It's something I regret, in more ways than one.”

As Varg finished his rueful tale, he saw Milea's expression and was relieved to see that she didn't seem to be judging him. The half-elf
shifted her position so that she sat side by side with Varg and laid a hand on his shoulder. “Everyone makes mistakes. You aren't that man anymore, and that's what matters.”

Varg looked her in the eyes and smiled. “If there's anything I've learned in my three centuries, it's that I would rather feel pain, sorrow, and misery than go through life feeling nothing. I have learned to cherish my humanity with all it's beauty and bile.”

Milea turned her face downward and smiled softly. Varg found himself leaning closer to her, awaiting a response.

“Varg, there's something I need to tell you,” she whispered.

Varg straightened his body with anticipation and answered, “Oh?”

“Yes,” Milea stopped, but hesitantly continued, “I have never revealed this to another soul, but after the events the other night, I feel it's time.”

Varg's expression must have revealed something, for Milea then added, “I had a feeling you may have overheard something that night with me and Jin.”

“I did, but I didn't want to bring it up until you were ready to talk about it,” Varg said gently.

Milea sighed and stepped off of the bed. She paced back and forth for a minute, then, “Jin knew something about me that he couldn't have, that he
shouldn't
have
. I don't know if he's a mind reader, or if I hallucinated part of it.”

Varg shook his head and answered, “You didn't. He mentioned something about betrayal and then you started to go into some kind of fit.”

Milea cleared her throat, then said, “Jin's revelation made me start thinking about how this has taken its toll on me for so long, and I think it's time I finally confide in someone about it.”

“I'm listening,” Varg assured.

Milea closed her eyes and prepared herself before she spoke again. “It all started when I left the Crystal Wood with my father. I'll spare you the details, but let's just say my mother decided she didn't want to be married to a human anymore and leave it at that. Father and I moved to a small fishing village in the west, where he took up work as a dock worker and eventually remarried. It was a modest life, but nice. Despite my being half-elf, there were some people who didn't treat me that harshly. I don't mean to brag, but when I entered adolescence I actually had a few admirers. One such admirer of mine was the son of the village leader. I liked him, but I wasn't sure I was interested in a relationship with him and I was sure to let him know that. Still, he kept pining after me. I assumed it was harmless, but I was unfortunately . . . mistaken.

“One night, when I was returning home late after hunting, I ran into my admirer a good ways outside the village, where he confronted me about denying his advances. I finally decided I had enough and told him firmly to leave me alone, but this only seemed to fuel his anger. He grabbed me and threatened my life, at which point I pulled out my knife to defend myself, but he pried it from my hand and knocked me to the ground. That was when he . . . forced me.”

Varg's chest felt tight when he heard Milea's last words. The half-elf bowed her head in shame and tried in vain to control her tears. Varg patiently allowed her to collect herself before she spoke again.

“When he was done, he let me dress myself and leave, for he knew I was too afraid to tell anyone what he had done. I ran home and as soon as I approached the front door, my father walked out with a torch, apparently to search for me. He saw my wet cheeks, bruises, and torn clothing and knew instantly what had happened. He demanded that I tell him who did it, but it took several minutes and him reassuring me that it wasn't my fault before I told him.

“My father flew into a rage worse than anything I'd ever seen. He ran to my attacker's home and savagely beat him to death in front of his entire family. Despite the circumstances, my father was arrested and hanged for murder the very next morning. I remember when I saw his body fall, I just lost all sight of who I was. It wasn't until after my step-mother blamed me for his death and threw me out of the home my father built for us that I realized just how alone I truly was.”

Milea turned to Varg and watched his expression. He remained calm, but his eyes bore a sign of sorrow. She sat on the bed again with her back facing him, unable to look him in the eye. She then heard Varg step off of the bed and his footsteps steadily travel around the bed, so she shut her eyes and put her hand in her hands.

“I've been alone for so long. All I want is to be alone most of the time. I . . .”

Milea was interrupted when Varg grabbed her hand and gently pulled her to her feet. Without a word he embraced her. She buried her face in his wide chest and kept her eyes closed for the longest time, fighting back tears for every second. She didn't understand what made him so easy to talk to
.