The Visions of Ransom Lake (14 page)

Worst of all, she had willingly allowed Jerome Clayton to begin courting her now. And instead of helping her to move on and try to accept that Ransom Lake would never love her, it only served to drive the blade of disappointment and heartbreak further into her soul. She had thought that giving herself the opportunity to know Jerome better, to find things to like about him, would help her to accept the inevitability of having to put Ransom Lake out of her mind. But it hadn’t helped. It had instead made things worse, for every time she forced herself to be pleasant to Jerome, to laugh at his wit, to admit his attractiveness, it was as if someone had plunged a dagger into some part of her heart. Yet it seemed the truth of life. Yvonne assured her Jerome was a wonderful boy. Everyone assured her he was. And she knew everyone approved of him. But yet…something in her couldn’t accept him. And she was certain this was because everything in her loved the mysterious, the deliciously handsome Ransom Lake.

“
Ya don’t quite look yourself tonight, Miss Vaden,” Jerome remarked as he helped her into the buggy.

“
Oh, just a bit tired today, I suppose,” she sighed, buttoning the top button of her coat, for it was a rather chilly night. At that moment, as if fate meant to drive the dagger of despair deeper into her heart, Ransom Lake stepped in front of the mare that was hitched to the buggy.

“
How ya doin’ this evenin’, Jerome? Miss Vaden?” he asked in his masculine, mumbling manner.

“
Just fine, Ransom. And you?” Jerome greeted, standing up and reaching across Vaden to shake Ransom Lake’s outstretched hand. She didn’t look at him at first, afraid she might burst into tears at the sight of the tantalizing storm color of his eyes. But when he addressed her directly, she knew she must face him.

“
You two out for an evenin’ ride then, Miss Vaden?” he mumbled. Her hand had been resting on the rim of the buggy. When she felt the worn leather of Ransom Lake’s glove cover her hand, she startled, looking directly into his hypnotic gaze.

“
Yes…yes. It’s a nice evening for it. Don’t you think, Mr. Lake?” she stammered. Oh, how handsome he was! How enticing! Vaden was unsettled as she felt the moisture in her mouth increase as she continued to look at him.

“
I’m just in to talk to your Uncle Dan a minute, so ya have fun now,” he said, stepping back from the buggy as Jerome slapped the lines at the horse’s back.

“
Good evenin’ to ya then, Ransom,” Jerome called.

Vaden closed her eyes as the buggy lurched forward and away from her heart’s one desire. Over an hour later, Jerome pulled the mare in front of the mercantile and offered Vaden his hand to assist her down. As he walked her to the porch and paused before the closed doors, she realized it was the first time since they’d left Ransom Lake standing there that she fully heard what Jerome was saying. All evening, though Jerome was at her side, ever flattering, ever attentive, her thoughts had been of nothing else but the vision of Ransom Lake standing next to the buggy and so near to her, his eyes intent on hers in a manner of thinly masked disapproval.

“
I’m sorry, Mr. Clayton. I-I know I haven’t been good company tonight,” she apologized as Jerome took her hand in his, squeezing it tightly. “I’ve just…just had some things on my mind and—”

“
It’s all right, Miss Vaden,” he accepted. “I think ya just need…”And in the next moment, before Vaden could move to avoid it, she felt the moist warmth of Jerome’s kiss on her lips. She wanted to pull away from him, slap his face, but she knew she had led him to this. She had accepted his courting, encouraged him even as of late. What else could she expect? When his kiss lingered, threatening to become more than a tender bidding goodnight, she stepped back from him.

“
Goodnight, Mr. Clayton,” she whispered. “I do thank you for your company this evening.”

Jerome’s eyes were narrowed, his expression serious. “I love you, Vaden Valmont. I’m a good man, and I’ll make a good—”he began.

“
You are a good man, Mr. Clayton,” Vaden interrupted, though her compliment was not in earnest. She did not want to hear his confession, his assurance that he would be a good companion for her throughout life. “I…just be patient with me, please. Be patient.” He seemed satisfied with her response for the moment and smiled, nodding a goodnight as he turned and descended the porch steps.

Vaden watched Jerome disappear down the street and into the night. A heavy sigh escaped her lungs, and a horrible sense of guilt and disappointment churned in her stomach. She had allowed him to kiss her goodnight, and his kiss had meant nothing to her. It had no effect on her, save it caused her to want him to leave. She closed her eyes, trying to call up a vision, the sensation of what it might feel like to be in the arms of Ransom Lake had he been the one to have briefly kissed her. She knew with everything that made her Vaden Valmont that had the kiss been from Ransom Lake, however brief, she knew severe exhilaration and delight would have overwhelmed her. Further, she knew such bliss could never be achieved from kisses forced by Jerome Clayton.

She thought her imagination’s creation had come to life for a moment when she heard Ransom Lake’s voice near. But when she again heard his voice say, “Miss Vaden,” she opened her eyes and turned to find him actually standing at the foot of the porch steps glaring up at her.

“
Mr. Lake,” Vaden exclaimed, blushing, for she suddenly feared he could read her thoughts somehow.

A frown furrowed his brow as he shook his head slowly. “I thought better of ya than that.”

“
What do you mean?” Vaden asked, folding her arms across her chest.

“
He’s a worm.”

“
Who?” she asked, for her most recent thoughts had been of Ransom Lake, not Jerome Clayton.

“
Jerome Clayton, girl! Who do ya think I mean?” He seemed overly vexed but not uncharacteristically so.

“
He’s a very nice young man, Mr. Lake. Everyone speaks well of him. I don’t understand why you—”

“
He’s a worm,” he repeated. “Why would ya let him kiss you like that?”

Vaden’s mouth gaped open slightly as the horrid heat of a guilty blush rose to her cheeks. “What do you mean, Mr. Lake?”

Observably irritated, Ransom stomped up the porch steps, coming to stand before Vaden. “Why would ya let a little worm like that kiss you, girl? He certainly don’t know how to do a proper job of it,” he growled.

Vaden was completely flustered and speechless. She was horrified in the knowledge he had witnessed her exchange with Jerome. Yet Ransom Lake held no great desire for her, so what right did he have to scold her so? She wanted to scream at him—to shout,
You don’t want me, so who else is there?
Instead she said, “I don’t think this is any of your business! He’s a very nice young man, and I hold him in high esteem.” She wondered why she was so vehemently defending Jerome when she herself was in doubt of his sincerity of character at times.

“
Exactly. So why are ya lettin’ him slobber all over ya like a parched camel?” Ransom Lake’s eyes narrowed as he glared at her.

Vaden felt the heat that preceded stinging tears well up in her throat.

“
He hardly slobbered all over me, Mr. Lake,” she defended. “And I still don’t see what business this is of yours.”

“
You’d think the boy would at least try to do a proper job of it since ya let him kiss ya. But he’s too wormy to even come close to it. I expected more from you, little girl.” He turned and started to leave, but the tone of hurt in Vaden’s next utterance seemed to stall him.

“
And who do you think you are, Ransom Lake? I suppose you think you could do a
proper
job of it!” Her voice cracked with restrained emotion as she spoke.

She watched as he turned toward her, glaring, his broad chest rising and falling with his exasperated breathing. His eyes narrowed once more. He leaned forward until Vaden could feel his breath on her face as he spoke. “You bet them neatly ironed petticoats of yours I could, sweet pea,” he growled. Then, without any further warning, Ransom Lake took hold of her mittened hand and pulled her down the steps after him.

“
What are you doing? Let go of me!” she protested as she tried to pull her hand free of his grasp. But Ransom Lake led her forcefully to the side of the house and out of the light of the lantern on the porch.

“
First thing I’d do is get ya out of the light so every danged neighbor for fifty miles around can’t peep at us. Can’t kiss ya proper when you’re worried about who might see.” Rather roughly, Ransom Lake turned Vaden to face him, pushing her back against the building. “Then I gotta back ya up against a wall so ya can’t turn away from me.” He took her hands, stripping them of her mittens and tucking the woolen warmers tightly into her coat pockets. He whisked her cap from her head, tucking it safely into his own trouser pocket.

Vaden gasped and tried to grab at his hands as he then quickly unbuttoned her coat.

“
What are you—”she gasped.

“
Be quiet,” he growled. “I gotta get rid of some of this so ya know it’s me warming ya up and not—”

“
What?” Vaden gasped. “I can’t believe you would say something like that!”

“
Yes, ya can. You know me well enough by now, Vaden.” And with that, Ransom Lake’s utterance of her name so informally, Vaden Valmont was undone. Not that she really wanted to elude him anyway, but now, after hearing and seeing his mouth say her name so familiarly, she was dazed for a moment. She could only stare into those unusual gray eyes as he continued.

“
Now,” he began in a whisper—as he moved closer to her, she could no longer see the warmth of his breath turning to fog before her—he said, “I’ll show ya the difference between that wormy Jerome Clayton and the likes of Ransom Lake.”

Vaden shook her head ever so slightly. She already knew the difference—the profound and obvious difference. She closed her eyes for just a moment as one of his powerful hands caressed her cheek. As his roughened thumb traveled lightly over her soft lips, she looked away from him shyly.

He did not force her to look back at him, but as he traced the outline of her lips with his thumb once more, he said in a lowered voice, “I’d bet my life that your pretty little mouth tastes sweeter than sugar.”

She looked up to him quickly, breathless and unable to believe what her ears had heard him say. He was so handsome, so fatally and lethally attractive. Surely she was simply daydreaming.

“
Hasn’t that wild curiosity of yours ever wondered…haven’t ya tried to imagine what my kiss tastes like, Vaden?” he whispered.

“
No,” she tried to state emphatically. “No. Never.” Then her curiosity even at that moment rose to an uncontrollable height, and she asked, “But…what do you mean
tastes
like? I don’t…”she stammered, finding it difficult to control her breathing.

Ransom Lake chuckled, and a triumphant grin spread across his face. “Well, that right there proves the boy didn’t kiss ya proper.”

“
You’re just trying to—” she stammered in a whisper.

She gasped into silence as she felt Ransom’s hand move beneath her coat and rest at her waist for a moment before sliding to her back and pulling her body against his. Again his free hand caressed her cheek. He put his thumb under her chin, pushing her face up and forcing her eyes to find his. His hand moved, his thumb caressing her throat as it encircled her neck. Even for his bulky clothing, his body was warm against hers, the muscles in his chest and arms solid as he held her to him.

“
He didn’t even hold ya proper…didn’t let his hand feel the softness of your face like he should have before he…you didn’t enjoy that kiss at all did ya, Vaden?” he mumbled.

The deep intonation of his voice seemed to echo throughout Vaden’s head, and she struggled to keep from collapsing at his feet.

“
Why are you teasing me like this?” she breathed in a frustrated whisper. She was trembling, uncontrollably so. Being in Ransom Lake’s arms, the feel of his body pressed to hers, it was exhilarating!

“
I’m not teasing you. I’m teaching you, teaching ya that ya don’t go lettin’ every wormy boy in town enjoy your kiss.”

She looked up, and his gaze seized hers.

“
What…what makes you different than anybody else?” she managed to ask, though her voice was nearly lost to the bliss of being held by him, to the pleasure of his touch.

He grinned somewhat triumphantly then, and her insides began to quiver uncontrollably, for it was definitely her final undoing. “I think ya know what makes me different from the likes of Jerome Clayton, now don’t ya?”

Vaden couldn’t answer. She couldn’t even nod an acknowledgment to him. She could only close her eyes as his head, his handsome, roughly shaven face, and his tempting mouth moved closer to hers. It was too torturous, and she was certain he could hear her heart pounding madly. She opened her eyes and tried to look past him to the stars in the skies, the leaves falling softly to the ground from a nearby tree, to anything that might help her not to faint in his arms.

When he spoke next, she felt the warmth of his breath on her lips. The wondrous sensation caused excessive moisture to drench her eager mouth.

“
There’s more to a kiss than my lips on yours, Vaden,” he whispered. Her skin prickled with goose bumps as his lips brushed hers teasingly. “There’s the feel of my arms around ya so ya know it’s me holding ya here.” The tip of his nose brushed her forehead as his lips placed a soft kiss on her own nose. “There’s the feel of my whiskers rough on your cheek and around your mouth so ya recognize I’m a man and not some wormy boy.”