“Catherine, I’m fine.”
After finally calming Catherine, Xavier listened patiently to a litany of rules that Anne and Catherine expected him to follow every day for his safety. He promised to do so a thousand times. This last brush with a mob had startled him enough to obey.
Strangely, they never mentioned the night and brushed it aside as if he hadn’t said anything. Of course Thomas always protected him, but what about when he left for the night? Surely Thomas slept, and what then? Again they laughed it off, but he let them forget it for fear of more rules.
17 July 1791 Late evening
XAVIER SAT ALONE and exhausted at the Saint-Laurent home after a long afternoon, trying to forget the man and his henchmen who had come after him, instead thinking about the three women in his life.
After he calmed Catherine and Anne, Maria showed up and they went through the same conversation. Remembering several afternoon appointments, Xavier tried to leave but all three made him repeat everything. Then Catherine asked about his appointments and exploded when she heard that he had a secret baptism and wedding to perform in the church.
“Absolutely not,” she said with agreement from Anne and Maria.
“You can’t stop me.”
Maria, red with anger, began to shout when Catherine cut her off.
“You may do it on our terms. You’ll use the chapel in this house for such occasions. It’s small, so I’ll transform the outer room for you. We’ll say nothing else of your clandestine activities so long as they take place here and Maria helps.”
Xavier left soon after with Denys and returned to the house shortly with his entourage of parishioners seeking various rituals. He spent his afternoon administering to one person after another.
This flurry of activity and his morning adventure tired him more than usual, so Xavier slumped into a large leather chair outside the chapel to rest.
“I thought we told you not to wear that?” Catherine suddenly asked, pointing at his clothing.
“Maria allowed it so long as I take it off before leaving,” he answered.
“Well, you’re done for the day. Take off those vestments.”
Then she darted away. Xavier got up, locked himself in the chapel, and returned to his lay clothing. Afterward, he walked out of the chapel as Catherine buzzed by again in the opposite direction.
“Oh, do you have a moment?”
“Of course,” he answered.
“You’re safer in those clothes. I can’t say that they look natural. You were actually made for those priestly robes and garments. But this makes me feel better. Come, sit.”
Catherine sat on a leather chair, so Xavier joined her and sat on a nearby couch.
“We have talked about this a million times,” she began, “but do it once more for me.”
“Catherine, I’m being careful. I promise. And I’ll follow all of your rules. I won’t be alone unless in the church with guards outside or in this house. I’ll travel with others. The only time that I’ll let my guard down is with Thomas, and I’ll also remind him to watch out for me. What else can I say?”
Catherine jumped up, knelt before Xavier, and gave him a gigantic hug, then kissed him on the head and left, but she turned around before she got to the door.
“Yes?” Xavier asked. “I thought we were finished.”
“You looked at us strangely today when we gave Thomas charge over your safety throughout the night. Perhaps you should ask him about it.”
She almost continued when Maria walked into the room. Catherine and Maria had become friends since Maria had to move into the salon. Her help was indispensible, and Catherine appreciated having another strong woman in the house.
“I just saw Michel,” Maria said.
“Oh, God, is he here again to warn me about something? Or to shut us down?” Catherine asked.
“No, I was at the market and he was down a side street, involved in some quarrel.”
“Was he safe?” Xavier asked.
“As safe as one can be in battle,” Maria answered.
“Can you send someone to look after him?” Xavier asked Catherine.
“I know you’re worried, but we have to leave him alone. He ordered as much, and if we don’t respect his wishes, how can we expect him to honor ours?”
“I don’t want him to be killed.”
Catherine lowered her head. “Nor do I. But there’s nothing we can do.”
Xavier nodded, disliking that she was correct.
“Xavier, can you come with me to purchase more bandages for our hospital?” Maria jarred him out of his contemplation with this sudden question.
“Yes,” he said and Catherine took leave.
“I wanted to be alone with you,” Maria said outside of the house. “I was worried.”
“About what?”
“You and I, we get so wrapped up in what we’re doing with the church and with people. I think we need to take more time for ourselves. The girls and I are doing this already. We started it when we had to move into the house, especially now that we’re down in the cellar. But you and I need to do it, too.”
“What are you trying to say?”
“I just need to hear that you’re really...well, that this revolution isn’t taking its toll on you.”
“I’m doing well enough. I hate the violence. But given the circumstances, I’m doing as well as can be expected.” His real anguish was with Thomas, but he did not want to bring that up with her.
As they walked through Paris, with Denys and two other guards close behind, they talked more about the violence and how they disliked it but generally agreed that they could do little but help those who crossed their path. It was like old times when they wandered around the parish on a Sunday, talking and greeting people as they went. As they returned to the house, Xavier noticed that Maria had avoided talking much about herself. He wanted to know if she was well enough, too.
“Are you happy living here?” he asked. “It was an abrupt change for you.”
“Yes, I am. At first I missed the convent. This is different. And I was angry. But I’m accustomed to this and feel that I’m doing good work in the hospital. Moving to our own quarters did a lot of good, too. Catherine works so hard. I want to do anything to help her. Besides, she accepts me and my girls, no question.”
“Do you possess them?”
Maria blushed. “Only when they want to be! And no more than someone else possesses you!”
“That’s enough,” Xavier swept his hand in the air and sent a laughing Maria on her way. He started inside when he saw a familiar form coming down the street. He smiled widely.
17 July 1791
DESPITE HIS CONSTERNATION, Thomas grinned when he saw Xavier on the porch, smiling like a damsel who had just spotted her knight. Xavier was so charming in those peasant clothes that he fixed to look neat and tidy. Despite his anger and intention to scold the abbé for what had happened that day, Thomas melted as he neared the Saint-Laurent home. Yet he still must reprimand Xavier. That was his first thought upon wakening and seeing the note from Anne Hébert.
Thomas had almost forgotten to worry constantly about Xavier because he had grown accustomed to the rioting, but today he woke with dread in his heart. He threw the lid off of his trunk too hard, shattering it into pieces, and dressed hurriedly. Something alarmed him terribly about Xavier’s safety. He paused momentarily before sprinting out the door to leave a note for his servants to fetch his back-up trunk, when he saw the note from Anne and ripped it open: “Thomas, before you go anywhere tonight, I must speak with you at my place. Anne.”
He threw it into the trash and raced out the door, arriving at Anne’s place in seconds. He knocked frantically on her door until she called for him to enter.
“Well, such manners, banging on my door like that. We may be friends now, but I think your behavior needs improving.”
“What is it? Why did you send me that note?”
“Are you going to apologize for the entry?”
“I hardly think that this is the time for decorum.”
She erupted with laughter, making him even angrier. “He’s just fine. No need to lose your temper.”
“Then why did you want to see me?”
“We need to discuss something, but he’s safe. Were you surprised I sent you something?” she asked, crafty.
“How did you know where I lived?”
“I’ve my methods,” she said.
“Tell me. How did you discover where I sleep?”
“Because you just told me.” She cackled even harder. “I only figured out how to get you a letter, I had no idea you slept there. Now, you know I’ve my ways of acquiring such information, and you know I’m not about to share them with you. But, if it makes you feel better, it was very difficult to come by. Your place is safer than you think.”
“But if you discovered it, could Marcel?”
“Well, I hadn’t thought about that. Do you sleep in the same place every night?”
“I have been,” he answered.
“Then maybe you should move about more.”
“So he has the power to locate me?”
She smiled, a sly, protective grin. “Actually, no. It doesn’t seem that he has firm control over the magic. He’s an amateur. It’s obvious that he has learned from someone dumb enough to give him the black magic. But I don’t think that they told him all the secrets, only what they wanted him to know. Otherwise things would have been much worse by now. I suppose that he could find you, but it seems highly unlikely that he could figure it out. And it doesn’t happen quickly. You’d probably have a warning. He’s haphazard. For example, he put the potion on Catherine, no one doubts that, yet he can’t control what anyone around her thinks. Do you think, in the same situation, that Anne would have idiot spies running around Paris?” She slapped her knee as she laughed at the notion. “Hell, no. The problem for us is that he’s not interested in anything good. This is black magic, bad forces. I told you that I refuse to deal with them. They bring nothing but chaos and harm. So we must be careful, because he doesn’t know how to control them. And when he does, it’s no doubt often by mistake. He could discover you by accident, without knowing what he’s doing.”
“I’ll do what I must,” Thomas answered.
“Good. And I don’t worry about you.”
“Is there anything else that we can do for Catherine?”
“I told you I was acting for her, and I am. But I’ll not do the black magic. No way, no how. So, short of that, there’s not much that can be done. I got Xavier and Jérémie watching her every move. They report that there’s no change in her, which is good. His potion isn’t that powerful, another sign that he was taught by someone who limited his powers for some reason.”
“Limited?” Thomas asked.
“Yes, a silly, simple love potion that makes people infatuated. Nothing else. Nothing lasting about it. That’s why she has to take it so often.”
“Very well. Now, tell me why you sent the note.”
“Oh, all right. I regretted sending it after a while but it was too late. You promise me that you’ll not come down hard on Xavier.”
“What is it?”
“No, you aren’t in charge around here. Promise first.”
“It depends on what you have to say.”
“Let me hear it from you. You won’t go yelling at him. You won’t go shouting and screaming. It hurts him more than he lets on. I see it in his soul. You need to grow up a little. Things bounce off you, you two argue and you forget. You return to him all fine, and he’s so happy to see that you came back he pretends to be fine, too. But each time you start with him it scars that soul. It may not be what you’re wanting, but he loves you like you want him to. So treat him that way.”
He scowled. “I’ll keep myself under control. Now please, tell me.”
“They tried getting him today.”
Anxiety gripped his heart. “Who? What do you mean?”
“He was out, doing his preaching or whatever the hell he does, I don’t know. And someone recognized that he was a priest. So they came after him.”
“I thought you said he was safe.” Thomas practically snarled the words, thus ignoring Anne’s earlier entreaties.
“He is. I was there, I got him out. Oh, you should have seen his face. I had to act like we were man and wife. It was the only way to convince them that he wasn’t a priest.”
Man and wife? Xavier and Anne? Despite his outward amusement, Thomas still seethed inside. He had instructed Xavier a thousand times that he endangered himself more and more as this revolution intensified and he kept performing these useless Catholic rituals. But Xavier refused to change his routine and disregarded his safety.
“I must go,” Thomas said abruptly.
“You promised me, now. But I see in your eyes you don’t intend to keep that promise.”
Thomas hesitated, thinking about how Anthony told him the same things, that his temper would bring him nothing but pain. “Can’t I worry about him?”
“We all do. But you’re not allowed to yell at him. He was doing good for people, no matter how foolish.”
“But he has to be careful.”
“And your screaming at him will ensure he does? It hasn’t yet.”
Thomas bit his tongue and paced. She was right. Of course she was right.
“Very well. I’ll follow your advice, and I’m grateful that you came to me.”
“Remember, you promised. I’d scold you some more but there’s a disturbance in here—“ she stopped and glared at him. “Damn, I forgot again. It’s you. That undead aspect to you.” She motioned him toward the door. “You got what you want, now go to him. And remember your promise.”
Thomas nodded, curt, and quickly left. He fought his emotions the entire way to Xavier. One minute he was livid, then Xavier’s caring nature and innocence flashed through his mind and softened him. Yet next the anger returned because Xavier risked too much. Up and down went his emotions, his head a mess of contradictions. Then he spotted his abbé on the balcony. Thomas blew a kiss and hurried up the steps.
17 July 1791
“THOMAS, YOU’RE HERE!” Xavier greeted him.
“You look radiant this evening,” Thomas said.