The Unofficial Zack Warren Fan Club (8 page)

“At least it’s nice.” I said, ignoring his reference to what I was wearing, or not wearing. We had double sinks and ample drawer space. A separate shower with a dark gray curtain and blue tiles stood next to the tub. It was actually pretty, and surprisingly contemporary.

“I don’t believe this.” He murmured, sliding a hand over his face. “Our parents are insane.”

“I cannot share a bathroom with you.” I tried to look at anything but him and his nicely chiseled abs. Really, I tried so hard. But my eyes were drawn to his stomach like moths to a bug zapper. I decided Glenn wasn’t the only one who had strict rules, or needed them for that matter. “Look, were stuck with this arrangement, so I think it is in our best interest to figure out set times for using the bathroom.”

He stared at me, his eyes measuring me in a strange way. I couldn’t do anything but stare back, rooted to the spot as he pushed up from the tub and crowded my very personal space.

His cocky, cool mask was gone.

I could see it in his eyes. Looking at me like I looked at him, in confusion and fascination. It was terrifying. Other guys didn’t look at me like this, as if they could see my soul, everything that made me tick.

Sometimes I think I can see inside him too, and by the expression on his face, he felt it. There were days when he met my gaze, when he looked tired from practice, and I felt like he wanted something from me. I squashed the strongest urges to throw myself at him, wrap my arms around his waist and give him a hug. He’d looked like he needed it. Wanted it.

His baby blue eyes were warmer than they’d ever been; boring into me with such intensity and emotion my knees began to shake. I had to squash the urge to fling myself at him now because of what I saw in his eyes. He wanted me, needed me.

Beneath the cocky attitude was a person I could rely on, share secrets with. Someone who would never hurt me. His reason for acting like an ass was a mystery, but I bet he thought it was important.

This boy didn’t have a mean bone in his body and he didn’t want me to know.

“I’m not going to go to the bathroom at specific times.” His nose was an inch from mine. He bent close and trapped me against the bathroom counter. Our eyes were still locked, but that look of fascination faded away, replaced by blankness, and so much confusion that it made me confused. Scared. I was scared we’d never figure out what this thing between us meant.

“I meant…I-I,” I couldn’t think with his face so close, or the smell of his minty toothpaste breath fanning across my skin. All I could do was focus on keeping that tiny inch between us. I was supposed to hate him—no, really dislike him—after all, hate is such a strong word. But this was for our protection, so he wouldn’t find out about the club and get hurt, thinking I was like those other girls. I’d loose any respect he had for me if he knew what I’d done.

“Baker?” he sounded irritated, glaring at me with an expression I wasn’t familiar with. He was either going to kiss me or toss me out of the bathroom.

“Sorry.” He took a step back, not looking in the least bit apologetic. Instead he sounded more amused by my reaction. Most girls would be pulling him closer.

“I don’t like being intimidated.” I sighed, rubbing my eyes, wondering how I would survive living with him.

“You look tired.” Now there was some kindness in his voice.

“Yeah, so do you.” I gave him a half smile. “I really didn’t mean what I said about scheduling times. Uh, I like to shower at night. It helps me sleep when I feel clean.”

He chuckled. “Good, I’m more of a morning person. Showering helps me wake up.”

“This works then.”

“Yep,” his hesitation was barely detectable, and his fingers lightly brushed my elbow as he walked out of the bathroom. “Goodnight.”

“Night,” I sighed, shutting the door behind him, rubbing my elbow. It was like I could still feel his fingers on me, smoothing over my skin.

I forced myself to forget what happened, showered, and brushed my teeth and pulled on a white tank top and cotton shorts. It might be night, but it was still warm out. When I saw myself in the mirror, my cheeks heated. I might as well be in my underwear again. I felt overexposed. I should be wearing a bra under my top and donning sweat pants, a parka even.

Shaking my head, I flipped off the bathroom light and went into my room, making sure the door was shut tight behind me. I tossed Kirk a boot shaped chew toy.

For me it was love at first drool when I found him five years ago at the pound. He might snore, fart, and make a huge mess when he got into the garbage, but I loved him.

He hopped up to sleep at the foot of my bed with his boot, I plugged in my nightlight, and we snuggled in.

I fell asleep almost instantly…after trying to wipe the image of a half naked Zack from my mind.

Chapter 9

Zack

After a shower, and subsequently a run-in with the little terror next door, I sat at my desk, staring at the bathroom door, now closed. The light was on and shower running. Chloe was humming. I tried not to think about what happened between us in the bathroom. I tried hard not to think about her standing under the hot water…naked. I’d been successful, until she stared to hum. Her voice was soft, sweet.

It had been nothing short of terrifying and amazing. Feeling her slam into me, smelling the sweetness of her hair. It was better than anything I’d ever felt.

She looked up at me, her lips forming a small smile. Her cheeks going pink. I wanted to kiss her. Really kiss her. The kind of kiss that no other guy could ever or would ever top. I wanted to ruin her for anyone else. My reaction felt primitive, like I’d reverted to a caveman or something. I’d never experienced that before.

The urge was so sudden and strong I almost kissed her.

But I counted to ten, sat on the side of the tub, and turned into the grouch she was more familiar with. I put on a good act, trying to make it seem like I really wanted nothing to do with her. But it had been the hardest act of my life.

When she shrank back and I wanted to kick myself. I wish there was a way to rewind time, to tell the younger me that keeping Chloe at a distance was the stupidest thing I would ever do.

Too wound to go to sleep, I decided to finish unpacking. I had a desk, a bed, and a computer.

Now, I could function, but I didn’t feel like waiting until tomorrow to finish, and I needed a distraction. So I started on my punching bag. I got my dad’s toolbox from the garage, and brought my desk chair to the far left corner of the room. I could thank Chloe for the room switch. Even though the wallpaper sucked, it was bigger than the other room. Big enough for me to hang the bag here, and not in the garage or attic, where there wasn’t any air conditioning.

I located the support beam running through the ceiling. I drilled a hole, installed the bag and decided to test out my handiwork.

My first hit was soft. I watched the bag swing. Didn’t smack the wall, and it seemed pretty stable. My next couple hits were hard. I kicked. It swung. The thing was solid.

The computer burbled, making that strange sound on Skype. I sat down to see Kyle sent me a message.

Toohot4U:
Zack, what up?

ZWpchr:
Not much.

Toohot4U:
party?

ZWpchr:
I’m staying in tonight, but thanks.

Toohot4U:
you need to have more fun! spring break!!

ZWpchr:
We have different ideas about what constitutes fun.

Toohot4U:
but I need you man

ZWpchr:
Why?

Toohot4U:
people don’t listen to me

ZWpchr:
So you want me there incase the party gets crazy? What am I, your bouncer?

Toohot4U:
duh!

ZWpchr:
I feel so used.

Toohot4U:
seriously?

ZWpchr:
No, you ass.

Toohot4U:
I invited the mason twins ;)

ZWpchr:
Tempting, but I’m still going to pass.

L&K4VR has signed on

L&K4VR:
HEY BOYS!

Toohot4U:
hey babe

ZWpchr:
Hi, Lana.

L&K4VR:
R U READY TO PARTY ZACK?

ZWpchr:
No thanks, maybe next time.

L&K4VR:
JEEZ, YOU AND CHLOE ARE SO BORING. SHE CAN’T COME TO THE PARTY CUZ SHE DOESN’T HAVE A CAR! ZACK! YOU HAVE TO COME SO SHE CAN COME TOO!!!!!!

Toohot4U:
chill out honey we’ll throw another party

L&K4VR:
PROMISE?

Toohot4U:
yes

L&K4VR:
OK, THEN I GTG. I NEED TO PUT ON MY PARTY DRESS.

Toohot4U:
the red one?

L&K4VR:
YAH!

Toohot4U:
too bad it won’t stay on for long

ZWpchr:
TMI

L&K4VR:
KISS KISS! LOVE LOVE! BYE BYE!

L&K4VR has signed off

ZWpchr:
I’m happy for you guys, but I feel like she’s yelling all the time.

Toohot4U:
thinking about taking her to caps lock rehab

ZWpchr:
Lmao, nice. Well, I’m going. Later.

Toohot4U:
you’re coming to the next party dude

ZWpchr:
Maybe.

My eyes drifted shut and popped open again. The light coming from the crack beneath the bathroom door had gone out a couple hours ago. I was in bed. It was hot in my room, and I doubted if the air was working. I lay there, wondering if Chloe was hot, if was she still awake or dreaming. Did she dream in color? Have nightmares?

One time Chloe dropped her books in the hallway, and I wanted to help her pick them up. I was on the other side of the hall, talking with Kyle. By the time I’d given an excuse and made my way over, she’d collected her books.

I stopped in the middle of the hall. Our gazes met. She had the most striking hazel eyes, shot with honey and gold. Just being trapped in her gaze made me forget what I was doing. I wondered what she was thinking about.

I didn’t want to feel so much for someone. I felt powerless when I couldn’t make things better for my dad. I got this strange and overwhelming fear I’d loose Chloe too, that wouldn’t be strong enough to save her. I wasn’t strong enough to save my mom.

But I couldn’t loose something I didn’t have, right?

So by keeping Chloe at a safe distance, never having her kisses or smiles, I protected my heart. The most vulnerable part of me.

Except, I had Chloe right next door, just feet away. At school she lived a floor below me. And the more she smiled, the more she laughed, the more I started to realize that I couldn’t go through life keeping my heart closed off from others. Fear would not rule me.

I had to let someone in. I dated a few girls, trying to open up. They were nice, but they weren’t anything special, nothing like Chloe.

I’ve known she was special since the first day I met her. I didn’t do back flips off the jungle gym for just anyone. When I realized I was showing off I threw a lizard at her to cover it up. Then she started crying.

I pushed out of bed, feeling the heat, sweating like I’d been on a brisk walk at the hottest part of the day, and went to check the thermostat. It was set pretty cool, but I wondered if it was going to crap out. It was an old house. On my way back to bed I paused outside Chloe’s door. It was open, probably to let Kirk wander freely. I wasn’t being creepy. I just wanted to check on her.