The Unconsoled (65 page)

One of the men shouting the loudest looked familiar and I was trying to recall where I had seen him before when I heard him cry:

'Mr Brodsky, I really must insist!'

I then recognised the grey-haired surgeon I had encountered earlier in the forest, and realised that indeed, at the centre of the crowd, moving forward slowly with a look of stubborn determination, was Brodsky. He looked ghastly. The skin on his face and neck had become white and startlingly shrivelled.

'But he says he's all right! Why can't you let him decide?' a middle-aged man in a dinner suit shouted back. A number of voices immediately endorsed this statement, to be met in turn by a chorus of protest.

Meanwhile Brodsky continued his slow progress, ignoring all the commotion around him. It looked at first as though he were being borne aloft by the crowd, but as he came closer I saw he was walking by himself with the aid of a crutch. There was something about this crutch which made me look at it more closely and I saw that it was in fact an ironing board which Brodsky was holding, vertically and folded, under his armpit.

As I stood watching this spectacle, people seemed one by one to notice me and fall respectfully silent, so that the closer the crowd came, the more quiet it grew. The surgeon, however, continued to shout:

'Mr Brodsky! Your body has had a very severe shock. I really must insist you sit down and relax!'

Brodsky was looking downwards, concentrating hard on each step, and did not see me for some time. Then finally, sensing a change in those around him, he glanced up.

'Ah, Ryder,' he said. 'Here you are.'

'Mr Brodsky. How are you feeling now?'

'I'm fine,' he said calmly.

The crowd now stood off a little and he covered the remaining distance towards me with greater ease. When I complimented him on the way he had so quickly mastered the art of walking with a crutch, he looked down at his ironing board as though remembering it for the first time in a while.

'The man who brought me here,' he said, 'he happened to have it, this thing, in the back of his van. It's not so bad. It's strong, I can walk with it fine. The only trouble, Ryder. Sometimes it starts to open up. Like this.'

He shook it, and sure enough the ironing board began to slip open. A catch prevented it from opening more than slightly, but I could see how its repeatedly unfolding even to this extent would prove a serious irritation.

'I need some string for it,' Brodsky said a little sadly. 'Something like that. But there's no time now.'

As I looked down to where he was indicating, I could not help staring aghast at his left trouser leg, tied into a knot just below his thigh.

'Mr Brodsky,' I said, forcing myself to look up again, 'you can't be feeling so well just now. Do you have the energy to conduct the orchestra this evening?'

'Yes, yes. I feel fine. I'll conduct and it will be… it will be magnificent. Just the way I've always known it would be. And she'll see then, with her own eyes and ears. All these years, I wasn't being such a fool. All these years I had it in me, waiting. She'll see me tonight, Ryder. It will be magnificent.'

'You're referring to Miss Collins? But is she coming here?'

'She's coming here, she's coming. Oh yes, yes. He did his best to stop her, make her afraid, but she's coming, oh yes. I've seen through his game now. Ryder, I got to her apartment, I walked a long way, it was hard, but in the end this man came by, this good man here' - Brodsky looked around at the crowd and waved vaguely towards someone - 'he came by, he had a van. We went to her apartment, I knocked on the door, I knocked and knocked. Someone, a neighbour, thought it was like before. You know, I used to do that, knock and knock on the door at night, and they'd get the police in the end. But I said, no, you fool, I'm not drunk any more. I had an accident and now I'm sober, I can see everything. I shouted this all up to him, the neighbour, some fat old man. I can see everything now, see everything he's been doing all this time, yes, that's what I shouted up. And then she was coming to the door, her, she was coming, and she could hear me talking to her neighbour and I could see her through the glass, not knowing what to do, and so I forgot the neighbour and started to talk to her. She listened, but she didn't open the door at first, but then I said, look, I've had an accident, and she opened the door then. Where's that tailor? Where's he gone? He was supposed to get my jacket ready.' Brodsky looked around him and a voice from the back of the crowd said:

'He won't be long, Mr Brodsky. In fact, here he is.'

A small man emerged with a tape measure and began to measure up Brodsky.

'What's this? What's this?' Brodsky muttered impatiently. Then he said to me: 'I have no suit. They had one ready, it was delivered to my house, they say. Who knows? I had the accident, I don't know where it is now. They'll just have to get me a new one. A suit and a dress shirt, I want the best tonight. She'll see what I meant, all those years.'

'Mr Brodsky,' I said, 'you were telling me about Miss Collins. Do I understand you've managed to persuade her to come tonight after all?'

'Oh, she'll be coming. She promised. She won't break her promise a second time. She never came to the cemetery. I waited and waited but she never came. But that wasn't her fault. It was him, that hotel manager, he made her afraid. But I told her it's too late for fear now. We've been afraid all our lives and now we have to be brave. At first she wasn't listening. What have you done? she kept asking. She wasn't the way you usually see her, she was almost crying, holding her hands up to her face, almost crying, not even caring the neighbours could hear it all. The dead of night and she was saying, Leo, Leo - yes, she calls me that now -Leo, what have you done to your leg? There's blood. And I said it's nothing, it doesn't matter. An accident, but there was a doctor passing by, never mind that now, I told her, much more important, you have to come tonight. Don't listen to that wretch from the hotel, that… that
bell-boy
. There's very little time left. Tonight she'd see what I'd always meant. All those years, I wasn't the fool she thought. And she was saying she couldn't come, she wasn't ready, and besides, she said, all those wounds, they'd open again. And I said don't listen to that bell-boy, that hotel janitor, it's too late for that. And she pointed and said, but what's happened, your leg, it's bleeding, and I said never mind, I shouted at her then. Never mind, I said. Don't you see it, I have to have you come! You have to come! You have to see for yourself, you have to come! Then I could see it, that she knew how serious I was. I could see her eyes, how things changed behind them, how the fear went, how something came alive, and I knew I'd won at last and that cleaner of hotel lavatories had lost. And I said to her, quietly now, I said to her: "So you'll come?" And she nodded calmly and I knew I could trust her. Not a trace of doubt, Ryder. She nodded and I knew I could trust her so I turned and went away then. I came here, this good man - where is he? - he brought me here in his van. But I would have walked, there's nothing so wrong with me now.'

'But Mr Brodsky,' I said, 'are you sure you're well enough to go on stage? After all, you've had a terrible accident…'

I had not intended it, but my taking up of this theme had the effect of setting off another round of shouting. The surgeon pushed his way to the front and, raising his voice above the others, punched his fist into his hand for emphasis.

'Mr Brodsky, I insist! Even if it's only for several minutes, you
must
relax!'

'I'm fine, I'm fine, leave me be!' Brodsky shouted and began to walk. Then, turning back to me -I had remained stationary - he called: 'If you see that bell-boy, Ryder, tell him I'm here. Tell him that. He thought I'd never get this far, he thinks I'm dog-shit. Tell him I'm here. See how he likes it.' With that he went off down the corridor, pursued by the arguing crowd.

I continued in the opposite direction, looking for some sign of Hoffman. There were now fewer orchestra members standing about the corridor and many of the dressing-room doors had closed. At one point I was thinking of doubling back and peering in more closely through those doorways that were open, when I caught sight of Hoffman's figure in the corridor up ahead of me.

He had his back to me and was pacing slowly with his head bowed down. Although I was too far away to hear him, it was clear he was rehearsing his lines to himself. Then as I came nearer he suddenly lurched forward. I thought he was about to fall, but then realised he was once more performing the curious movement I had watched him practising in Brodsky's dressing-room mirror. Stooping right over, he brought up his arm, the elbow jutting outward, and began to bang his forehead with his fist. He was still doing so when I came up behind him and coughed. Hoffman straightened with a start and turned to me.

'Ah, Mr Ryder. Please don't worry. I'm sure Mr Brodsky will be here any moment now.'

'Indeed, Mr Hoffman. In fact, if you were just now rehearsing your speech of apology to the audience for Mr Brodsky's non-appearance, I'm pleased to inform you it will not be required. Mr Brodsky is now here.' I gestured down the corridor. 'He's just arrived.'

Hoffman looked astonished and for a second froze completely. Then he collected himself and said:

'Ah. Good. What a relief. But then of course, I was always… I was always very confident.' He laughed, looking up and down the corridor as though hoping to catch sight of Brodsky. Then he laughed again and said: 'Well, I'd better go and see to him.'

'Mr Hoffman, before you do that, I'd very much appreciate you giving me the latest news regarding my parents. They are, I trust, safely in this building by now? And your idea of the horse and carriage -I believe I heard it as I was driving past the front of the building earlier on -I trust it created the impact you were hoping for?'

'Your parents?' Hoffman looked confused again. Then he put his hand on my shoulder and said: 'Ah yes. Your parents. Now let me see.'

'Mr Hoffman, I've been trusting you and your colleagues to take good care of my parents. Neither is in the best of health…'

'Of course, of course. There's no need to worry. It's simply that, with so many things to consider, and Mr Brodsky being a little late, though you tell me he has now appeared… Ha ha…' He trailed off and once more cast his gaze down the corridor. I asked quite coldly:

'Mr Hoffman, where are my parents at this moment? Do you have any idea?'

'Ah. At this precise moment, I have to be honest, I do not myself… But I can assure you they are in the most capable hands. Of course, I would dearly wish to oversee personally every aspect of the evening, but you must understand… Ha ha. Miss Stratmann. She would know exactly where your parents are. She has been instructed to keep a close eye on the situation regarding your parents. Not that there is any danger of their ever being in want of attention while they're with us. On the contrary I have had to ask Miss Stratmann to watch carefully that they don't become exhausted on account of the hospitality that will inevitably be showered on them from all directions…'

'Mr Hoffman, I take it you have no idea where they are at this point in time. And where is Miss Stratmann?'

'Oh, I'm sure she's here somewhere. Mr Ryder, let's walk along and go and see how Mr Brodsky is doing. I've no doubt we'll soon come across Miss Stratmann along the way. She may even be in the office. In any case, sir' - he suddenly adopted a more commanding manner - 'we won't achieve a great deal standing here.'

We set off together down the corridor. As we walked, Hoffman seemed to recover completely his composure and he said with a smile:

'Now we can be certain it will all go well. You, sir, look like a man who knows exactly what he's doing. And with Mr Brodsky here, all is now set. Everything will go just as planned. A splendid evening lies before us all.'

Then his step altered and I noticed he was staring at something in front of us. Following his gaze, I saw Stephan standing in the middle of the corridor with a troubled expression. The young man saw us and came towards us quickly.

'Good evening, Mr Ryder,' he said. Then, lowering his voice, he said to Hoffman: 'Father, perhaps we could have a word.'

'We're very busy, Stephan. Mr Brodsky has just now arrived.'

'Yes, I heard. But you see, Father, it's to do with Mother.'

'Ah. Mother.'

'It's just that she's still in the foyer and I'm due on in fifteen minutes. I saw her just now, she was just wandering about the foyer, and I told her I was going on soon and she said: "Well, dear, I have to see to a few things. I'll try and catch the end of your performance at least, but I'll just have to see to a few things first." That's what she said, but she didn't look that busy. Really, though, it's time you and Mother were both taking your seats. I'm on in less than fifteen minutes.'

'Yes, yes, I'll be along in just a moment. And your mother, I'm sure she'll finish whatever she's doing very soon. Why get so worried? Just go back to your dressing room and get yourself ready.'

'But what is it Mother's got to do in the foyer? She's just standing there, chatting with anyone who happens by. Soon she'll be the only one left there. People are taking their seats now.'

'I expect she's just stretching her legs before settling down for the evening. Now, Stephan, calm yourself. You've got to get the evening off to a good start. We're all counting on you.'

The young man thought about this, then seemed suddenly to remember me.

'You've been so kind, Mr Ryder,' he said with a smile. 'Your encouragement has been invaluable.'

'Your encouragement?' Hoffman looked at me in astonishment.

'Oh yes,' Stephan said. 'Mr Ryder has been extremely generous with both his time and his praise. He's been listening to me practise and he's given me the greatest encouragement I've had in years.'

Hoffman was looking from one to the other of us, a smile of incredulity hovering on his lips. Then he said to me:

'You've been spending time listening to Stephan? To him?'

'I have indeed. I tried to tell you this once before, Mr Hoffman.