The Truth About Faking (7 page)

“
That was for H… Harley,” he finishes, his eyes twinkling at me.

“
What does that mean?” Mom’s eyes are not twinkling. She’s not smiling either as she approaches my fake boyfriend.

“
Oh… Mrs. Andrews?” Jason looks startled, but he recovers quickly and sticks out his hand. “Jason James.”

“
Jason,” Mom shakes his hand, then unceremoniously drops it. “Now why would you show up half-dressed for Harley?”

“
Umm…” Jason looks confused, so I jump in between them.

“
It’s my fault, Mom. I told Jason the guys had to dress like that. I thought he knew I was kidding.”

“
I figured you were,” he says. “It was a joke.”

Mom doesn’t relax, and I decide against pointing out the whole double-standard going on here. I’d been understanding about her ridiculous skin-cancer on the butt thing.

“
Well, you’re not to be out late,” she says.

Dad puts his hand on her shoulder. “It’s good to have a sense of humor,” he says.

But Mom’s still in hyper-protective mode. “Drive carefully.”

“
It’s okay, Mom,” I say. “Jason’s been very ten and two, eyes on the road all week.”

“
Let’s keep it that way,” she says.

“
Home by eleven, kids.” Dad smiles and slides his arm around my mom.

“
Yes, sir,” Jason says.

I follow him out to his stupid Gremlin.

“
What next, Jason? Jeez.” I fluff my hair again. It’s already getting flat. “Did you really
not
want to go to the luau after all?”

“
Damn, Harley, your mom’s a total babe!” he finally says. “You could’ve warned me.”

“
What?” He is so unexpected.

“
And your dad had on a priest collar.” He stops and opens my door. “What’s that all about?”

“
He’s the pastor at First Prez,” I say, getting in the Gremlin. “You didn’t know that?”

“
Nuh uh.” Jason closes my door and jogs around. “I didn’t know what to say when your mom walked over. I was thinking she looked just like…”

“
Pocahontas?”

“
No… I mean, Yeah! That’s better,” he says. “I was thinking of someone else. But Pocahontas is way better.”

I really don’t feel like talking about this. “Well, get over it. There’s a line.”

“
What?”

“
A line of guys waiting for her. Take a number.”

“
For your mom?” Jason glances at me. “I’m happy dating you, H.D.”

“
Good ‘cause it gets old.” I look out the window and don’t even bother correcting him.

Jason’s quiet for a beat. “But they say you should check out the parents of people you date.”

“
Fake date,” I look back. “And who says?”

“
The dating experts. That’s what you’re going to look like when you’re old.”

“
Mom’s not old. And it’s not like we’ll still know each other then anyway.”

“
We might. And it’s good to be prepared.”

“
Don’t get too prepared. This is only for two weeks.”

He smiles at me. I frown back.

At the luau, Jason and I circle the gym talking to friends and carrying plastic cups with little umbrellas in them. I notice Trent and Shelly arrive and wave at them. Shelly’s gone all out with leis around her wrists and ankles and a grass skirt. Trent’s wearing jeans and a t-shirt, and he looks so great. I imagine it being me there holding his hand, whispering something funny in his ear and making him laugh. I picture him kissing my cheek, maybe that spot right beside my ear, and for a moment I melt.

“
You okay?” Jason’s watching me, and I almost blush.

“
Of course. I was just thinking about… something.”

He doesn’t pursue it.

The luau’s a sophomore-sponsored dance, so last year our class did all the planning and decorations. Reagan Smith and her little party-planning crew are all discussing whose version’s better—ours or theirs. Reagan notes that last year, when she was in charge, we had a cochin de lait. I mentally note at least this year we have a limbo pole. She intentionally left that off last year’s luau agenda.

Jason pulls me to the dance floor when a slow song starts. “Girls worry about the dumbest stuff,” he breathes as we sway back and forth.

“
Reagan’s just afraid someone’ll think this party’s better than hers was,” I say, resting my hands on his shoulders. “And she’s working on prom now, so she’s nuts.”

“
Prom.” He exhales and makes a face.

I shake my head. “Don’t worry. Our prom’s pretty low-pressure, and finding a date’s not hard. I mean, there’s always somebody in need. Reagan just makes everything a bigger deal than it is.”

I glance over Jason’s shoulder at Trent, and imagine us at prom. Him in a tux, me holding his arm, wearing that white goddess dress…

“
You all seem close,” he says, catching my eye again.

I smile. “Well, except for you and Trent and a few other people, we’ve all gone to school together since kindergarten.”

“
That must be weird.”

I look around the room at all the familiar faces. I wave at Shelly who’s watching us dance, and I try to imagine being in a room with total strangers.

“
I don’t know. It can be nice. You know. Knowing everybody and what to expect.”

We sway for a few seconds in silence. I notice Jason’s hands resting gently on my waist and glance up again at his dark brown eyes. They’re sort of deep like he’s thinking about something.

“
So, preacher’s kid,” he says. “You all wild and shit?”

“
No,” I frown. “And Dad’s cool, but he would not like all the cussing.”

“
So you’re not all wild and
stuff
?”

“
That’s a total stereotype. And stereotypes are how stupid people make sense of the world.”

He laughs a little. “That something your dad says?”

“
My mom.”

“
Yeah, about your mom…” I can feel Jason’s fingers playing with the ends of my hair. The tiny pulls gave me little chills, so I slide it away.

“
What’s she like?” he says.

“
I thought you weren’t interested.”

“
I’m not, but… it seems like you were mad about her before. Or something.”

I look at him for a second and then shake my head. “I shouldn’t have said that before. Mom’s great.”

“
So there’s not a line of guys waiting for her?”

“
No,” I confess. “Just one.”

“
One meaning your dad?”

“
One meaning her student Ricky.”

Jason frowns. “Who’s Ricky?”

I fiddle with the side of his collar, not meeting his eyes. “Her massage therapy student. He’s always at our house.”

“
Your mom teaches massage therapy?”

I nod. “She coaches a senior from the college in Glennville every year. And she teaches yoga and prescribes herbal remedies. Stuff like that.”

“
We had a lot of that in New Mexico.”

“
I’m sure.” I glance up at Jason’s hair. It really is a pretty color, and for a moment, I imagine sliding my fingers through it. Just to see how it feels, of course.

“
So you think this Ricky guy’s after your mom?”

“
Yes.” I answer without hesitation. Then I pause. I’ve never told anyone how I feel about Ricky and my mom. I can’t believe I’m telling my fake boyfriend.

“
That’s weird. What does your dad think?”

“
Nothing,” I shake my head. “I mean, nothing’s going on. Ricky’s just her student.”

We’re quiet a second.

“
It just gets old sometimes,” I say softly.

“
I bet. It’s like he’s threatening your family or something.”

“
But he’s not. Mom would never do anything like that.”

Jason studies my face and our eyes meet. I didn’t expect him to understand how I felt, or that it might matter to me. But I realize the song’s over, and I lead us off the dance floor.

“
She wouldn’t,” I say again. But for a moment all I can think of is Shelly’s seemingly perfect parents, and how shocked we all were when it came out her dad had been sleeping with his secretary for three years. How it devastated her mom, turning her into a self-help addict. I notice Jason’s still holding my hand. Our fingers are laced, and it feels really comforting. Just then Shelly runs up and pulls me away.

“
Come with me,” she orders.

She drags me to the bathroom, and as we go in, I notice Trent walking up to Jason. I wonder what they’ll say to each other. I’m sure Jason’ll help me with my plan, but for a split-second, I’m not sure how I feel about that.

“
First, assertiveness training—pass! I am
so
becoming a life coach.”

“
What?” I’m confused.

“
All that between you and super hottie.” She looks at me, smiling. “Nice work.”

“
Oh.” I cross my arms and lean against the sink. “That wasn’t anything. I mean, he’s my date, but that’s all.”

“
You are so lying.” She looks in the mirror and starts pinching her cheeks. “You two were totally into each other on the dance floor just now.”

“
We were not,” I say, feeling embarrassed. “We were just talking.”

“
About what? It looked way intense.”

“
My mom?”

“
Oh, shit! That’s the other thing!” Her eyes are shining. “What’s all this about your mom and half-naked Ricky? I heard Mom talking to Ms. Jackson after their divorce survivors support group. Sounds like somebody got an eye-full.”

“
Oh my god! Did she also mention I was there? And that Ricky wasn’t naked? He had this mole on his butt, and he thought it was skin cancer.” I cringe internally at how stupid that sounds.

Shelly giggles and smoothes my arm. “Calm down. You know Mom wouldn’t believe anything bad about your mom. Even if he is crazy-hot. Did you get to see his thing? Is it… you know.” Her eyebrows go up, and I think I might barf.

“
I don’t know! And I couldn’t know because he wasn’t naked. He had on a towel.”

She does a little shiver and turns to the mirror again. “You are so lucky. It’s
so
unfair.”

“
Nothing happened,” I say. “Some women are just stupid.”

She slants her eyes at me and then pulls out her lip gloss. “Well, Trent’s about as fun as a pet rock.”

My eyes fly to hers. “What happened?”

“
Not a thing,” she sighs. “I’ve been working so hard to get him to talk about anything, I’m absolutely exhausted.”

“
Define anything.” I study her face. “Kool-aid stripes verses feather extensions? Is fringe too Boho? Is Boho even still in?”

“
Hardly. I could talk to
myself
about those things and be happy.” I watch her flick her bangs to the side. “Nope, I’ve tried sports, Shadow Falls, college… you name it.”

“
And what did he say?” I’m dying to know.

“
That’s just it! Nothing. He’s all yep, nope and silence.”

“
But he’s so sweet, and those eyes…” I look back at the mirror and think of the hydrangea blooms I saw earlier. “You’re probably just overwhelming him.”

“
Thanks.”

“
I’m just saying. You’ve got a big personality. He might not—”

“
Be able to get a word in?”

I bite my lip and try to cover. “That’s not what I was going to say!”

“
Yes, it was.”

“
I was going to say he might not know what to say.” The truth is Shelly’s right. I was going to say
get a word in
. But Trent is so perfect, he would never be rude to Shelly.

“
Well, if you’ve moved on to Jason, maybe I’ll try for an extra-hot make-out session,” she says, glancing at me and gauging my response. “Anything to save this lame date.”

I smile at her and try to hide my alarm. Now she’s excited again. “Maybe he’ll try something. I wonder if he has a move.”

“
What?”

“
Maybe he’s hiding a freaky side. He seems awfully tame, but I’ve been surprised before.”

“
Let’s get back to the dance.” I cannot think of Shelly getting freaky with Trent.

“
OK,” she says, and we both spot Jason at the same time. “But if you toss that one back, he’s mine.” Again she’s watching my response.

“
Sure,” I say, with a small laugh. In two weeks, she can have Jason. But I can’t let her know we’re planning it.

Driving home, Jason’s already organizing our next fake-out.

“
I’m thinking we should hit the movies tomorrow night,” he says. “What do you want to see?”

“
I don’t care,” I say, staring out the window. Try as I might, I can’t help but wonder if Shelly’s out there making moves with my hottie-future-husband.

“
Then
Roving Zombies Take Manhattan
it is,” Jason announces.

“
What?”

“
Seriously, H.D. You gotta work with me here.”

“
Oh sure, I’ll check online tomorrow and pick something.” We’re at my house, and I grab my sweater to go inside. “Thanks, Jason,” I say, reaching for the door handle.

“
Hang on…” He catches my arm and pulls me back. I freeze thinking he might try to kiss me. Fake kissing is not in the plan.

“
What?”