The Threshold Child (51 page)

She had no idea how long they galloped through the darkness, nor
did she have any clue where they were headed. She was merely intent on keeping
herself from falling off of Torith’s back. Occasionally she felt a reviving
surge from L’iam’s
vyala
, but it
wasn’t enough to restore her completely.

She was aware when they came to a stop, but only just so. A pair
of strong arms pulled her gently from her horse and wrapped her in a blanket,
whispering urges to go to sleep. The feeling of being embraced was comforting,
and Adesina gratefully complied.

When she awoke, she felt slightly ill, but much better as a whole.
Of her companions, only L’iam was awake, because it was his turn to keep watch.

He noticed that she was awake and looked at her sternly. “You
could have killed yourself.”

She frowned in confusion. “What?”

He sighed softly and began building up the fire. “You are
incredibly powerful, Adesina, but even you have your limits. You have to learn
to draw from the energy around you when you use your
vyala
as you did last night. Your life force cannot sustain power
like that.”

Adesina sat up slowly, fighting the wave of nausea that washed
over her. “I do not understand what you mean.”

L’iam glanced at her sharply, then shook his head ruefully.
“Perhaps you do not.”

He rummaged through the medical kit, pulling out certain herbs and
powders, and mixing them together. He put a small pot of water on the fire,
waiting for it to boil before adding the mixture he had created. The steam that
reached Adesina’s nose was refreshing, and helped to clear her head.

L’iam sat back, keeping a close eye on the concoction as it
boiled. “For most L’avan, their
vyala
draws its power from their own life strength. This is why L’avan grow tired and
their
vyala
cannot be sustained
indefinitely. Only those with gold in their eyes know how to take energy from
their surroundings.”

Adesina nodded. She remembered L’iam showing her how to do this
early on in her training.

“It is possible,” he continued, “to take minute amounts of energy
from everything around you. Small enough that nothing is disturbed, but
depending on your range of intake, those multiple small amounts are enough to
feed your
vyala
without expending any
life force of your own.”

The medicine on the fire appeared to be ready, so L’iam poured it
into a cup and handed it to Adesina to drink. She sipped it, savoring the
warmth as it spread throughout her body. It had a slightly bitter taste, but it
wasn’t unpleasant.

His eyes were solemn as he watched her drink the medicine. “What
you did last night, Adesina, projecting as far as you did and combining
vyala
as you did,” he shook his head, “I
have never seen anything like it.”

There was awe in his voice that warmed Adesina more than the drink
in her hand.

He went on in a very sober tone. “But you could have died. It was
all I could do to keep your life force going until we stopped to rest.”

She realized the seriousness of the situation and nodded to show
that she understood. “I did not know the danger, L’iam. I will be more careful
in the future.”

The relief in his eyes was apparent. He smiled his brilliant smile
and then turned his attention to tending the fire and preparing a meal. The
rest of the camp was beginning to stir, and Adesina glanced at the sky.

“What time is it?”

L’iam shrugged. “About midday.”

Her gaze turned to Aleron, who had gotten to his feet to stretch
and work out his sore muscles.

She began quietly speaking in the L’avan language. “What are we
going to do about him?”

L’iam also glanced over before fixing his eyes on the fire. “I do
not know. He certainly cannot come with us, but we cannot leave him alone.”

She nodded her head in agreement. As if he was aware that they
were talking about him, Aleron walked over to join them and spoke in a rush. “I
know it may be presumptuous, but I want to come with you.” When he received no
answer, he went on. “I have given it a lot of thought, and there is no doubt in
my mind that that is where I should go.”

Adesina raised an eyebrow. “Do you even know where we are going?”

He suddenly looked uncertain. “Well…no…I assumed your original
destination was the High City; but now that it is destroyed, are you not going
back to your homeland?”

She switched back to the L’avan tongue. “This would be an easy way
out. We could tell him that no outsiders are allowed in Pevothem.”

L’iam frowned, also speaking in their language. “Why not tell him
the truth?”

“Because he would insist on coming and helping in any way he can.”

Aleron looked between them, perplexed. “I promise I will not be a
burden! In fact, I could be very helpful. Before the High City was attacked, I
was training to be a healer.”

L’iam studied the young man sitting across from him before
replying in the common tongue. “We appreciate your desire to be of assistance,
but you cannot come with us.”

“Why?” he asked desperately.

Adesina threw a sideways glance at L’iam, hoping that his natural
honesty would not prompt him to say more than what was necessary to put off
Aleron.

“Because we are not going to our homeland. We are going into the
heart of Shimat lands, and it will be very dangerous.”

She repressed a sigh, wishing that L’iam would have simply lied
and said that they were going to their secret home.

Aleron, on the other hand, perked up. “All the more reason to take
a healer!”

The other L’avan began joining them beside the campfire. L’era
looked around at the situation and innocently asked, “Is he coming with us?”

“No,” said both L’iam and Adesina.

Aleron’s face fell. “Why not?”

“Yes,” said L’era, “why not?”

Adesina switched to the L’avan language again. “Because it is too
dangerous and he would only be a hindrance.”

“Oh. I suppose you are right,” admitted the princess. It seemed to
have slipped her mind that they were on a serious mission.

“We could drop him off in a nearby village,” suggested E’nes. “We
left behind many of our supplies when we fled last night, so we need to go to a
village anyway.”

“Will they deign to trade with us?” asked Adesina bitterly.

L’iam smiled sadly. “These are the central lands, so it is more
likely.”

Adesina turned back to Aleron. “You cannot come with us. It is far
too dangerous. We will take you to a nearby village, and there we must part
ways.”

He looked at her anxiously and was about to speak, but she held up
a hand to stop him. “No, Aleron, do not argue. From the village you may begin
your own journey of healing, like you always wanted to do, but you cannot come
with us.”

He searched each of the faces of the L’avan, looking for one with
sympathy, but they were all in agreement. He sighed in disappointment and
nodded.

After the meal, they packed up their makeshift camp and remounted
their horses. Adesina was still feeling a bit weak, but did her best to act
otherwise.

They began riding west, for this was the direction of the nearest
village. Very little was said as they rode, especially by Aleron. He kept his
eyes fixed on his horse’s ears, his face heavy with despondency.

As if in response to his mood, the sky clouded over and it began
to rain. At first it was no more than a light drizzle, but it grew heavier as
the hours wore on. By the time the village came into view that evening, they
were all drenched.

They rode into town just as the shops were beginning to close, so
L’iam led them to a small inn. The interior smelled strongly of cooking grease
and onions, and the air was filled with smoke. Still, it was warm, and they
were glad for a roof over their head. The proprietor eyed them suspiciously and
admitted that he had some empty rooms, but insisted on being paid in advance.

The L’avan first sat down around a table placed in a corner and
ordered supper, which the owner brought out and carelessly tossed on the table.
It consisted of some greasy potatoes and wooden chunks of meat, but it was
accepted gratefully.

Once left alone, Sa’jan asked, “What are we going to do now?”

L’iam was struggling to saw a piece of meat into a more manageable
size. “Tomorrow we will resupply and set out as soon as possible. We have lost
too much time as it is.”

He glanced at Ravi with a questioning look in his eye. Ravi nodded
once. “That would be wise.”

Adesina felt a wave of anxiety. “How much time do we have?”

He shook his head slowly. “Things are becoming less clear. I only
know that we must hurry.”

Aleron frowned in confusion. “Why must you hurry?”

She hesitated before deciding to explain. “Do you remember the man
taken from the High City just before I left?”

He nodded. “The magic…I mean, the L’avan?”

“Yes,” she affirmed. “We are on our way to rescue him from the
Shimat.”

Aleron’s frown deepened. “It seems to be a very dangerous mission
to risk for one man. Is he important?”

“Every L’avan is important to us,” replied Sa’jan. “Hopefully, he
will not be the only one we save.”

“Also,” added E’nes, “He is our father.”

Adesina couldn’t bear to look at the sympathetic expression on
Aleron’s face. His voice was brimming with sorrow. “Had he come to find you?”

Her smile was self-mocking. “I am doubtful, since he was not aware
that I was alive.”

“Then why was he in the High City?”

Adesina didn’t know the answer to this question. She glanced at
L’iam, who shook his head in response. “Even I do not know. His mission was
given to him by my father. I suspect it had something to do with the rumors we
were hearing about Shimat activity.”

“Well, if he was looking for the Shimat, he found them,” she said
coldly.

E’nes reached over to take her hand. “It is not your fault,” he
insisted.

She abruptly got to her feet. “I am going to bed. What time should
we leave tomorrow morning?”

L’iam’s expression was touched with sadness as he looked her in
the eye. “As soon as the shops open.”

She nodded curtly and then asked the innkeeper to show her to her
room. Adesina, L’era, and Ravi were to share one room, and the others would
share another. Ravi followed her upstairs and into the cramped, musty room
where they would be spending the night. The straw filled mattresses that made
up the bedding smelled like they had never been changed, and the blanket spread
over it was thin and scratchy.

Adesina ignored all of this and laid down facing the wall. She
heard Ravi sit down on the floor next to her bed.

“You know, he is right. It is not your fault, Ma’eve.”

“If I wished to discuss it,” she said shortly, “I would have.”

His tone of voice was light but serious. “Do not lash out at me,
my friend. I am not the one with whom you are angry.”

“Who, then?” she asked sarcastically.

“Yourself.”

She had been ready to make some biting remark, but this simple
reply stopped her in her tracks. Deep down she knew that she was acting
childish and that Ravi was right. Her self-loathing was so firmly rooted that
she felt it poisoning her soul.

Adesina rolled over to look her guardian in the eye. “I
am
angry
with myself.”

His voice was gentle. “I know, dear one.”

“So angry that I do not know what to do about it.”

He shook his head. “You have no reason for such hatred.”

“Do I not?” she asked incredulously. “Shall I list all the
atrocious things I have done in my life?”

Ravi quirked an eyebrow. “I know what you have done in your life.
I know everything about you, Ma’eve. None of it means that you are a terrible
person, just that you are human. A human who was manipulated by those she
trusted.”

She set her jaw stubbornly. “That does not excuse anything I have
done.”

He sighed. “Are you happy for the things you have done? Are you anxious
to rejoin the Shimat?”

Adesina raised herself up on one elbow. “Of course not!”

“Well, then?”

She laid back down. “Well, what?”

Ravi also settled down. “You have no reason for your self-hatred.”

“Hmph,” she turned away, unable to think of an argument.

“Stop being obstinate, Ma’eve. You have only ever tried to do your
best with the knowledge you were given. There is no fault in that.”

 
“I have done much harm,”
she whispered.

“Then right it,” he suggested. “Right the wrongs, change your
purposes from evil to good. That is all you can do. Being angry will only
destroy yourself.”