The Third Bear (26 page)

ix. The Battle for Kadavu Island

So brash, bloodthirsty Dakuwaqa swam out to do battle with the old, crafty, insane Octopus God. Once he had defeated the Octopus God, his army of sharks would swim in and take over, leaving just enough tentacle bits for the skates, rays, and lion fish to be happy.

As always, Selqu came with Dakuwaqa, and, as always, Selqu had drawn up the battle plan. The battle plan was always the same: attack, attack, attack, ceaselessly.

Dakuwaqa swam through a gap in the reef and entered the peaceful lagoons of Kadavu, the first shark to do so for thousands of years. The fish swam away screaming watery screams. The people - the ones Dakuwaqa did not surprise and eat - headed for shore, and once there retreated to the interior of the island.

Dakuwaqa searched the reef and lagoons for the Octopus God. He swam and swam, bellowing, "Come out, Octopus God. Come out right now, so I can eat you! Let's just get it over with. Be a shark about it!"

In response, from deep inside the darkest fissures and rifts in the reef, Dakuwaqa and Selqu heard a deep, chuckling laughter. The sound echoed through the coral and the seaweed. The laughter seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere, changing direction and speed with great and confusing swiftness.

"Maybe if you shout louder, God-Emperor," Selqu suggested from the place right above Dakuwaqa's forehead where he grasped the Shark God's skin with his suckers.

"Good idea," Dakuwaqa snarled. "Come out!" he roared again, so loud that the birds of the island rose in flocks, unsettled. "Come out and die!"

He could smell the Octopus God, but the scent was everywhere.

Several hundred feet beyond the reef his army circled restlessly - a gleam of gray silver, a suggestion of white teeth on a white foam surf.

Finally, as he began to tire, he heard the Octopus God say, "I'm right over here" - and saw the tip of a tentacle over the top of some coral.

Teeth gnashing - octopus flesh within his grasp - he swam at the tentacle at top speed, only for it to disappear into a crack in the coral.

Dakuwaqa was furious.

"Stop hiding!" he shouted in a bubbly shout. "Coward! Stop hiding! You are making it very difficult for me to get one more."

By now, he was really out of breath. It had been a long time since his prey had successfully hidden from him. He found himself gasping, his fins moving slower.

Again, he saw a tip of tentacle. Again, he raced toward it. Again, it disappeared.

"God dammit," snarled Dakuwaqa, and started swimming back and forth across the top of the reef again, fuming. This couldn't be looking too good to his countless minions.

Again, the tentacle. Again, it disappeared into a hole.

Dakuwaqa screamed his displeasure. Fish for hundreds of miles swam for cover.

Selqu dared say nothing.

"King Octopus!" Dakuwaqa roared. "I'm going to eat you slowly when I find you. I am going to savor each tentacle and each little suction cup on each tentacle. There won't be any of you left, you coward!"

Dakuwaqa was winded now. All of the eating he had done over the years had left him a little out of shape. If he was honest with himself, he would have realized that in human form he had become a somewhat flabby island youth over the last year or two.

"Coward?" he heard a sly voice say in his right ear just as eight tentacles lashed into his sides and held him motionless. "How about some other words, shark? How about some other words?" The tentacles continued to hold him tight.

"I don't need any other words, asshole," Dakuwaqa said. "I'm going to make you an eight-time amputee, and then I'm going to crush your head between my teeth and grind your beak down to dust."

The Octopus God laughed. "Let me welcome you to Kadavu Island with a hug. I don't think you'll soon be free of me."

And he was right.

The battle raged all day and into the night, but the Octopus God was right.

Dakuwaqa thrashed about. He spun, rolled, squirmed, pulled, pushed, opened his jaws, and slammed them shut. But no matter what he did, he could not get free of the Octopus God's tentacles. In fact, he began to get a bit dizzy. Selqu had gotten dizzy a long time before, and was in danger of losing his grip on the God-Emperor's skin. Even worse, the Octopus God had sometimes loosened just one tentacle long enough to grab a snack of crab from the nearby reef, but even then Dakuwaqa had not been able to get free. Worst of all, the Octopus God would not stop talking about the underwater light show he was working on...

"Just... one... more..." he said slowly. He was beginning to feel as if he were going to be sick.

"You can't get free of me," the Octopus God said in his sly, mad voice. "I can hold you here until you drown if you like."

"Fuck you," Dakuwaqa said, but the Octopus God was, again, right. Like most sharks, he couldn't stand still for long - he had to keep moving forward to bring water through his gills. If he didn't he would drown. He wouldn't die, but he would drown, and keep drowning, and all during the process of drowning, there would be no way he could get free of the Octopus God, and it would hurt more than anything he had ever known.

Dakuwaqa thrashed again, shouting out to Selqu, "Do something! Do something, Selqu!"

At which point, the Octopus God ended Selqu's ambitions by pulling him off of Dakuwaqa and grinding him up with his beak. (Selqu's last thought had nothing to do with ambition, and everything to do with surprise.)

Dakuwaqa thrashed and changed into a flabby youth holding his breath, but the Octopus God held on. He changed into a ray. He changed into a giant lobster. He changed into a slippery eel. He changed into a whale. But still the Octopus God held on. Not only that, the Octopus God was squeezing the life out of him.

The Octopus God squeezed harder. "Do you give up?"

Dakuwaqa began to see black spots in front of his eyes. He was painfully aware of his waiting shark army. He knew, even without looking, that some of them would be trying to take a bite out of him later, even if he won.

Around them, the water was now darker and colder, the sky above the water pressing down and blue-black. All around, the phosphorescent glow of the coral illuminated them - and the flitting stars of glowing fish too stupid to have hidden already. The Octopus God strobed red and green, blue and orange, content to battle Dakuwaqa to the end of time.

"I can do this forever," he whispered in Dakuwaqa's ear. "I can do this forever and a day. I can continue to recite lines to you from my underwater light show. I can sing, if you like. I do not mind. It is interesting. It is something to do."

Something gave inside of Dakuwaqa. Something broke. He stopped struggling and went back to his shark shape. All the ferocity had left his eyes. He could have been a young sharklet just out of his unknown mother's egg sac again. He remembered how helpless he had felt, coming out of the sac, squirming past its rough edges, for an instant held motionless by it.

"I give up!" Dakuwaqa wheezed. "I give up." He hated saying it. He had never said "I give up" before in his life. He had always said, "Just one more."

"Why should I let you go?"

Dakuwaqa snarled, then fell silent.

"Well," the Octopus God said. "I'm waiting."

"What do you want?"

"If I let you go, this is what I want - you will release all of the gods you have not already devoured. You will leave this island alone and protect all creatures that live on land and in the waters here from your sharks. You will never conspire to be the God of the Sea again."

Dakuwaqa groaned. He could feel water entering his body through his mouth. It did not feel good.

"Yes, yes, yes. Just let me go."

"You promise on your life?"

"On my life."

The Octopus God laughed. "I'm not sure I believe you, but let me tell you this: I've been talking to the God of the Turtles, and he says that if you cause me any more trouble, he will come back and be the God of the Sea again."

"I promise," Dakuwaqa said. He was turning blue now, and not a nice seablue, either. More of a my-gills-need-water blue.

"Remember what I have said, Dakuwaqa," the Octopus said, and released Dakuwaqa.

Dakuwaqa circled the Octopus God four or five times, forcing water back through his gills. He sputtered and coughed. Then he said, "It may not even matter, my promise. Because, when I go back to them, my shark army will try to tear me apart."

"Yes," the Octopus God said, "but you are the God of the Sharks. I am sure you will have no problem dealing with them. And if you do, I will just defeat the next Shark God."

Dakuwaqa was tired and hungry, and suddenly he knew that one day he would die. He did not feel young anymore.

"Goodbye," he said. "I hope I never see you again."

The God of the Octopi just laughed a watery laugh.

x. What Happened After...

Dakuwaqa did not die that day, although he received many scars. He did as he said he would, and released the other gods. Since that day, no god has ever again challenged the God of Kadavu Island. The people who live on the island can go out to fish and never worry. The Octopus God still lives in the reef beyond the island, guarding his people, and working on his light show.

Dakuwaqa no longer eats young women. For one thing, even in human form he is scarred, even on his face, and no longer handsome. For another, he has lost the taste for them. Some days, he does not eat at all, but simply rejoices at the feel of water pushing around his body. As he grows older and wanders through his kingdom, he finds that sometimes he is content with what he has. Sometimes, he does take human shape, now, but only to sit by a fire and to talk, or to listen.

Dakuwaqa will never rule Kadavu Island, but now that he is wiser, it does not matter much to him. An odd mood grips him now; his expression becomes serious. Someday, he thinks, walking along the beach at sunset, I will visit the God of the Turtles and learn what dream he dreams.

ERRATA

When I received Jeff VanderMeer's "story," reproduced below, my first impulse was to forward it to the writer's family, to whom it might be more relevant than to the readers ofArgosy. (The two photographs that accompanied the story - one of a kitchen freezer and the other of a waterlogged lobby - were more than a little disturbing to both myself and my wife, and I have declined to reproduce them within these pages.)

Unfortunately, my brother James had been quite explicit when he called to check on the progress of the issue two weeks before Mr. VanderMeer's story arrived. He insisted that I include the story in the magazine "no matter how unorthodox it may appear to be. "At fames' request, I had already slapped- rather bemusedly - some images of farm equipment and seals into the allotted space in the main volume ready to be replaced with the tardy story whenever it came in. According to James, whom I have not heard from since, VanderMeer's story "must be published both in the magazine and in a separate chapbook entitledsim- ply Errata. "James pays the bills, so despite any instincts to the contrary, I have no choice but to publish this "story" as he desires - although that doesn't mean I have to do so without comment or fair warning to the reader.