The Sweet Gum Tree (26 page)

145

Katherine Allred

I was wrong.

He was sitting on the floor at the bottom of the stairs, slumped over against the first step. His eyes were closed, one side of his face twisted into an unrecognizable mask. His left hand was on his lap, curled until it looked like a claw.

I don’t remember screaming or moving, but I must have done both. When Nick charged into the hall I was down on my knees, trying to lift the Judge’s body, cradle it close.

“He’s dead,” I moaned. “Oh, God. I let him die.” Nick’s hands were moving, touching the Judge’s neck, his wrist. “He’s not dead, he had a stroke. We have to get him to the hospital.” It took some effort, but he pried me away, then lifted the Judge in his arms as though he weighed little more than a child. “Alix!” His voice was sharp. “I need you to open the door for me.”

His tone worked. Frantically, I scrambled to my feet and ran through the kitchen, holding the door wide while he carried the Judge out, my gaze locked on the pale, contorted face of the man who had raised me.

“We’re taking my truck.”

I was in no shape to argue. Pulling the passenger door open, I waited as he lowered the Judge to the seat, then climbed in after, putting my arms around my grandfather to steady and support his limp body.

“Hang on.”

The trip seemed to take forever, even though we must have made it in less than fifteen minutes. There was a blurred sense of speed, of swaying as we dodged traffic, and I vaguely remember Nick talking to the hospital on his cell phone, letting them know we were coming. But all my attention was focused on the Judge.

“We’re almost there,” I whispered in his ear. “Don’t you die, damn it. If you do, I’ll never speak to you again.” I was hanging on by a thread, in shock with fear. My body trembled continuously and I couldn’t stop it.

They were waiting for us as the truck slid to a stop in front of the emergency room doors, waiting to take the Judge away from me. I chased them inside, into a small cubicle that was suddenly full of people.

Someone in blue scrubs stopped me, blocked my entrance. “How long has he been like this?”

It was Nick who answered. “Not too long, I don’t think. He’s dressed. It must have happened when he was coming downstairs.”

“What kind of medication is he taking?”

“Alix?” Nick put his hand on my arm.

Absently, I told them the name of the blood pressure medication the Judge was on.

I leaned to one side, trying to watch what the nurses were doing to my grandfather. “Is he going to be okay?”

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“We’ll know more later. There’s a family room right around the corner. Why don’t you wait in there?”

I shook my head. “I want to stay with him.”

“You’ll only be in the way.” Nick put his arm around me, used it to guide me down the hall. “Come on. They’ll let us know as soon they find out anything.” The waiting room was large and decorated in a style obviously meant to offer comfort, the furniture in warm beige tones, large and overstuffed. But I couldn’t force myself to sit down. I simply stood in the middle of the room, unable to move once Nick released me.

“Should we call your family?” He gestured toward a courtesy phone on the end table near the couch.

In addition to shaking, my teeth were chattering. I ground them together fiercely and tried to think. “Cody. Call Cody. He’ll know what to do. And Jenna. Tell her to run by the house and turn the coffeemaker off.”

It seemed to take him a long time, but I still hadn’t moved when he finished.

“Everyone is on their way. Cody will try to reach your father before he heads in this direction.”

I nodded. “Thank you. You don’t have to stay. Cody can give me a ride home if I need it.”

His jaw tightened. “I’m not leaving you here alone. Besides, I love the Judge, too.

He’s the closest thing to a real father I’ve ever had.” A sob welled up inside me, closed my throat until I couldn’t breath. “Oh, God. I can’t lose him. He’s all I have left.”

Instantly, Nick was beside me, leading me to the couch, pulling me down on his lap. His arms went around me and he rocked gently. “Ssh. He’s going to be fine.” For the first time since he’d come home, I stopped fighting him. Instead, I buried my face in his neck and soaked him with my tears, let him soothe me, completely unaware that I’d just allowed him to put a huge chink in my defenses. A chink that would gradually widen until all the walls I’d built so carefully crumbled into dust. I’m not sure I would have cared even if I had known. At that moment, I would have snuggled up to the devil himself if he’d offered comfort.

“How can you love him after what he did to you?” My voice was quivery, punctuated by hiccups.

“What did he do to me?” His hands ran over my back.

“Oh, God, Nick. It was his fault they sent you away. He forced the sheriff to make you join the army. If you’d fought them, you could have stayed here, cleared your name. You wouldn’t have had to leave.”

“He did what he thought was right, Alix.” His voice was low, soothing. “He was trying to keep me from getting hurt, maybe even going to jail. There was no guarantee that I’d have gotten off if it had come to a trial. He didn’t want me to go through that.

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Katherine Allred

Besides, as it turned out, sending me away was one of the best things that could have happened to me. If he hadn’t, I’d probably still be working at a gas station, barely making enough money to survive. Did you know he was paying the property taxes on the salvage yard?”

“The Judge?” I don’t know why I hadn’t realized it before. It made perfect sense.

“Yes. I came home expecting the salvage yard to be gone, confiscated because I hadn’t paid the taxes on it. I think I
wanted
it to be gone, didn’t want any reminders of my life there. Instead, it was still the same, waiting for me like the monster under my bed. The Judge knew I was going to have face it and deal with the past before I moved on. He was right, as usual, in more ways than one. I’d told Daniel about how I grew up, but I don’t think he really understood everything that happened until he saw the place with his own eyes. Cleaning up the salvage yard and turning it into something good is just what I needed.”

His chest lifted as he took a deep breath. “There’s only one thing about that time I really regret.”

“What?” I lifted a shaky hand to wipe the moisture from my cheeks, but I didn’t move from his lap.

“Pushing you away,” he said quietly. “That was the biggest mistake I’ve ever made.

But I was just a kid and scared half to death. I was trying to be noble, to do the right thing, when all I really wanted was to die at the thought of never seeing you again.” I didn’t believe him, of course. Couldn’t believe him. Because if he were telling me the truth, why had he gotten Lindsey pregnant? Why had he sent for her instead of me?

But I also couldn’t deal with all the anger my questions would bring right now. Not while the Judge was fighting for his life. And I couldn’t continue accepting Nick’s comfort feeling the way I did.

Straightening, I pushed away from him and slid off his lap just as Cody rushed into the room. Nick’s call must have gotten him out of bed. It looked like he’d jumped into the first clothes he’d came across and his hair was rumpled, as though he hadn’t taken the time to comb it.

We hugged each other hard for a long second before he spoke.

“How is he?”

“I don’t know. We’re still waiting to hear something. Did you reach the rest of the family?”

“There was no answer at Dad’s, but I left a message on his machine and told him to page me when they got home. I also called the local police. They know Dad and they’re going to look for him.”

He glanced over my shoulder, his expression wary in spite of his words. “Nick, thanks for handling everything and taking care of Alix. I owe you one.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m glad I was there.”

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From the door, someone cleared his throat and we all turned toward the man standing there. He looked young to me, dressed in the dark blue ER uniform he wore, but his name tag indicated he was a doctor. Cody put his arm around me as though to protect me from any bad news we were about to hear.

“I’m Doctor Abbott. Are you the family of Mr. French?” No one had ever called the Judge “Mr.” before and it took me a moment to realize who he was talking about.

“We’re his grandchildren,” Cody said. “How is he?”

“Your grandfather is lucky to be alive. The stroke was a bad one, but we’ve got him stabilized for now. We’re going to keep him in the emergency room a few more hours until we’re sure it’s safe to move him, then transfer him to ICU.” Relief left me limp. If it hadn’t been for Cody’s support I think my legs would have collapsed. “Then he’s going to make it?”

“No promises, but I’d say his chances are looking pretty good. We did a CT scan and then started him on a new drug that can reduce the damage caused by strokes if the patient receives it fast enough. It’s too soon to tell if it’s working yet, but I have high hopes for his recovery.”

“Can we see him?”

“Only for a minute, and one visitor at a time. He’s pretty much out of it right now.” If I hadn’t had the doctor’s assurances, the sight of my grandfather would have driven me to panic. The Judge was the strongest man I’d ever known, but now he barely made a wrinkle under the sheet, and tubes and wires were everywhere. Half a dozen machines surrounded him with beeps and gurgles and hisses, and the smell of antiseptic stung my nose.

Trying not to disturb anything, I touched his cheek, needing desperately to feel his warm skin under my fingers. The left side of his face was still distorted, drawn, but his right eye partially opened, focused on me, and the bewilderment reflected there broke my heart.

“You had a stroke,” I told him, praying he’d understand. “You’re in the hospital, but the doctor says you’re going to be fine. Nick and Cody are here, and the rest of the family is on the way.”

When his eye drifted shut again, I stayed another minute, telling myself he had heard me, that I really had seen the confusion leave his gaze.

Jenna was waiting in the hall as Cody slipped by me into the Judge’s cubicle. “He’s going to be fine,” she whispered, hugging me. “You know he’s too stubborn to die.”

“I’m glad you’re here.” I wiped my eyes yet again, feeling a bit like a faucet that had sprung a leak. I didn’t want to cry, but I couldn’t seem to help myself. My emotions were too near the surface.

“Hey, you’d do the same for me.” She dug in her purse and handed me a tissue.

“Now, why don’t we go to the waiting room and I’ll buy you a cup of coffee.” 149

Katherine Allred

“Okay.” I blew my nose, then followed her, Nick walking next to me. When Cody joined us a few minutes later, he was quiet and shaken, his complexion two shades paler than normal.

“Christ,” he said, rubbing his hands over his face. “You know it’s bad, but it doesn’t really hit you until you see him.”

Perversely, seeing Cody so upset made me take a step back and pull myself together. Crying wasn’t going to help the Judge, and my family needed me to be strong.

Handing him the coffee Jenna had given me, I rubbed his back in a soothing motion.

“The medication will work, Cody. It has to.”

“God, I hope you’re right. I don’t know how he’ll be able to stand it if it doesn’t.” We were talking in low tones, Nick watching us from across the room, when Jenna suddenly stiffened. “What the hell is she doing here?” I glanced toward the door and every muscle in my body tensed. Lindsey hovered in the entrance, her gaze going from me to Nick and back again.

She had changed. In spite of the baggy clothes that looked as though they came straight from a thrift store, she was one of the most beautiful women I’d ever seen.

Unlike most people whose hair darkens as they reach adulthood, hers was still the same white-blonde it had been when we were children. She wore it up, twisted into a loose swirl from which strands escaped to frame her huge blue eyes, eyes that gave the impression of some indefinable sadness and vulnerability. Anger filled me, held me in an icy grip impossible to break.

I stood slowly, aware that Nick was frowning, moving to intercept her. But she was closer than he was, and she reached me first, a tentative smile on her lips.

“Alix. I heard about your grandfather. I’m so sorry. Is there anything I can do to help?”

Her voice was soft and hesitant, and I realized it was the first time I’d ever heard her speak. At the same time, I also realized Cody was staring at her with the dazed expression of a man who’d been hit in the head with a two-by-four. It scared me, fueled not only my anger but all my protective instincts. She already had her claws in Nick, I’d be damned if I let her do the same to my cousin.

“Yes, there is something you can do.” My tone was as cold as the blood running through my veins. “Get out of my sight.”

“Alix, please. I know this isn’t the place, but sometime soon, we need to talk.” Her expression was pleading with me, but I didn’t care.

I turned on Nick furiously. “Get her away from me. Now. Maybe I couldn’t stop you from coming back, and maybe I can’t stop you from building a house where you are, but there’s one thing I can do. If either of you ever come near me again, I’ll press harassment charges. I’ll do whatever it takes to get you thrown in jail. And that, Nick, is
my
promise to both of you.”

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Some of the greatest philosophers through the ages have said that through adversity springs courage and strength, but sometimes all it brings is more pain. I think that scene with Lindsey was when I first suspected just how badly Nick had damaged my armor. The sight of him and Lindsey, together in the same room, was almost more than I could bear. Now I know it was a deep hurt, a soul-searing pain that made me react the way I did, but at the time, I meant every single word.

Nick must have known that as well while his gaze held mine. His eyes reflected a multitude of emotions—sorrow, pain, regret, anger—and a quietly determined stubbornness. Without a word, he took Lindsey’s arm and pulled her from the room, but I knew I hadn’t seen the last of him. He would call my bluff.