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Authors: Henry Wall Judith

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Chapter Five

L
ENORA ENTERED
B
ENTLEY’S
office carrying two cups of coffee. She handed him one and seated herself on the sofa.

“How did it go this morning?” he asked.

“We don’t have the results of the lab tests yet, but the doctor found no problems during Jamie’s physical examination. In fact, he said she seems exceptionally healthy. I’ve scheduled an appointment with the fertility specialist for tomorrow afternoon.”

Lenora paused and took a sip of coffee before adding, “She’s a virgin.”

Bentley digested this last fact. Somehow he would have preferred otherwise, although he would be hard-pressed to explain why. Amanda Hartmann originally had insisted the surrogate be “chaste.” Bentley had pointed out that such a requirement would severely limit the pool of possible candidates since most young women were sexually active by the time they were old enough to enter into a surrogate-mother arrangement, but it was her husband Toby who had convinced Amanda to keep an open mind. “Every baby is born pure in the eyes of our Lord,” he assured his wife. “And we have entered into a special covenant with Him. It is Him we serve.”

Amanda touched her husband’s face. “Sometimes the disciple teaches the master,” she had said with an adoring smile.

But now, it would seem that Amanda was going to get her wish. A virgin would bear a child to carry out their “special covenant.”

Which was nonsense, of course. Bentley told himself. It wasn’t as though he were a high priest sacrificing a virgin to appease the gods.

Or was it?

Bentley cleared his throat. “So, after spending all this time with Miss Long, what do you think of her?” he asked Lenora.

“I think she is sincere, honest, intelligent, lonely, and desperate,” Lenora said without hesitation.

Bentley took a sip of coffee before asking, “Do you think she is emotionally capable of coming through this arrangement unscathed?”

Lenora shrugged. “I suspect that no woman goes through a pregnancy without being changed in some profound way—whether she keeps the kid or gives it away. But I think Jamie is resilient enough to resume her life afterward.” Lenora paused before adding, “I do find myself wishing, however, that there was some other way for her to solve her financial problems.”

Bentley absently stared out the window thinking of his own spoiled daughter who had never earned a dime in her life yet had such a sense of entitlement about money and the things it could buy. His sons, too. He sometimes wondered if he had done the lot of them any favors by never insisting they get a job and at least buy their own vehicles.

“Jamie asked me what sort of people ‘the clients’ were,” Lenora said.

“What did you tell her?”

“That I’ve only met the woman once, which is the truth. Of course, I have handled countless phone calls from Amanda Hartmann and have found her to be unfailingly cordial and charming. She always remembers my name and seems to sincerely care about me as a human being, which I find quite flattering. She is, after all, a very famous person. Of course, I resent the hell out of people who want to do away with the separation of church and state—and that includes Amanda Tutt Hartmann. But it is hard to be angry with a woman who has been through what she has. So if she and her new husband want a kid and this is the way they want to go about it, I hope it works out for them.”

Lenora rose and headed for the door. With her hand on the doorknob, she said, “Hey, boss, promise me you won’t get involved in any more cases like this one.”

Bentley answered with a noncommittal laugh, then asked, “How’s law school?”

“Drudgery punctuated by moments of sheer enlightenment.”

 

Jamie took special care with her appearance, washing her hair and applying a touch of eye shadow and blush. She was wearing black slacks and a white cotton blouse, which she hoped would make her appear mature and businesslike. She added a narrow black belt and a pair of small pearl earrings, then checked her appearance in the mirror—and decided that she looked like a waitress.

She took off the white blouse and put on a blue one.

Today was the day she would meet Mr. Abernathy’s clients. She hoped that by this evening she would know one way or the other how she would be spending the next segment of her life.

After deciding that there was nothing more she could do to improve her appearance, Jamie sat down at the desk and placed a call to Dallas. To her sister.

Her heart pounded while she listened to the phone ring. When her sister answered, she said, “Ginger, it’s Jamie.”

“What do you want?”

“I want you to know that I truly wasn’t hiding anything from you. There was no hidden bank account. No hidden assets. Granny mortgaged the house just so we could get by. We pretty much lived hand-to-mouth.”

“So?”

“You left angry. I hated to leave things like that. I wish we could be closer. I’d love to see you sometime and get to know your daughters.”

“I suppose you think I should feel guilty because I didn’t raise you, but I don’t. I had my own life to live. I wish you well, but that is the best I can do.”

“I wish you well, too,” Jamie said.

“It wasn’t fair the way Mother fawned over you,” Ginger continued. “I was a latchkey kid, and then you came along and she treated you like a princess.”

“Good-bye, Ginger,” Jamie said, and carefully replaced the receiver as though it were made of glass.

“I am not going to cry,” she told her reflection in the dresser mirror.

But she did.

Then she tidied up the room so the maid wouldn’t think she was a messy person and headed for the elevator.

Ten minutes before the appointed hour, she was waiting in front of the hotel for Lenora. She was nervous. So much so, her stomach hurt.

 

The woman and her husband stood when Lenora showed Jamie into Mr. Abernathy’s office. They were two of the most dazzlingly attractive people Jamie had ever seen in person. They looked like movie stars. Like the sort of people who kept a yacht docked at some posh resort on the French Riviera.

Mr. Abernathy introduced them as Amanda and Toby. Amanda’s age was difficult to discern, but Jamie decided that she must be at least a decade older than her husband. Maybe more. She was obviously one of those women who took impeccable care of herself. She had perfect skin, perfect cheekbones, perfect posture, perfect figure, perfect makeup. Her pale lavender pant suit fit her slim body to perfection. Her gold jewelry was understated but impressive. Her watch was a Rolex. Her shoes and handbag were of the finest leather.

And she had a radiant smile. “You are every bit as pretty as Bentley said you were,” she said as she shook Jamie’s hand.

Toby stepped forward. He was perfect, too. Like a model in
Gentleman’s Quarterly,
down to the perfectly folded silk handkerchief in the breast pocket of his perfectly fitting tan blazer and his perfectly manicured nails. His smile revealed the whitest teeth Jamie had ever seen. “I am so pleased to meet you, Miss Jamie,” he said, taking her right hand in both of his.

Amanda seated herself on the sofa and patted the cushion next to her. “Come sit by me, Jamie. We need to get acquainted. Lenora will get you something to drink. What would you like, dear?”

“Just a glass of water, please,” Jamie told Lenora.

“I am so sorry about your grandmother,” Amanda said, once again clutching Jamie’s hand. “How dreadful for you to be left all alone in the world at such a young age.”

The look on Amanda’s face was so sincere that Jamie’s eyes filled with tears. And she felt herself relaxing. She liked this woman. Amanda seemed as kind and caring as Jamie had hoped she would be.

Amanda immediately fished a handkerchief from her handbag and handed it to Jamie. “You poor dear,” she said. “What you need is some time to heal, and our ranch is just the place for that. We have two swimming pools and a library full of books. Our excellent cook will prepare your meals, and our very competent nurse will look after you. And I think you’ll find your accommodations attractive and homey. Bentley told us that you’re thinking about continuing your studies while you’re at the ranch. I think that’s a wonderful idea, and I’ll see that a desk is put in your room. You won’t have a care in the world, my dear.”

Toby knelt in front of her. He had the most beautiful skin Jamie had ever seen on a man. His eyes were a pale golden brown. Arresting eyes that captured her gaze like a magnet.

“You’ve never seen anything until you see one of our West Texas sunsets,” he told her in a voice so gentle, he sounded as though he were trying to lull her to sleep. “Amanda and I travel a great deal, but we always look forward to our time back home at the ranch. And for as long as you are there, our home will be your home.”

Jamie had expected to be interviewed. To be asked dozens of difficult and personal questions. Instead she was being courted. They had already made up their minds.
They wanted her.

Jamie felt the tension flow from her body and smiled.

Amanda explained their plans. According to Jamie’s menstrual cycle, the first attempt at insemination could be made the following week and would be done by the fertility specialist here in Austin. Should any further attempts at insemination be necessary, a fertility specialist in Amarillo would perform them. Jamie would receive a ten-thousand-dollar advance payment today and have the week prior to the insemination procedure to get her affairs in order. After the procedure, she would be flown to the ranch in their private plane.

“I’d rather drive,” Jamie said. “I have my grandmother’s car.”

The room got very quiet. Mr. Abernathy, Lenora, and Toby all looked nervously at Amanda. “But I thought Lenora had explained the terms of the contract to you,” Amanda said in her same soothing voice, but the look on her face was one of displeasure—a look that made her seem less lovely. “Once the contract has been signed, you will not be allowed to drive a vehicle.”

“But I have several things I need to take care of over the next week. And I’ll need my car after the baby is born.”

“It can be stored here in Austin. We’ll see that you have transportation back to Austin after the birth of the baby.”

“Everything I own is in that car,” Jamie explained. “I would just feel more comfortable if I had it with me at the ranch.”

“Very well,” Amanda said with just a touch of irritation in her voice. But the smile had returned to her face. “If the car is that important to you, Lenora can arrange for it to be transported to the ranch. And you can go ahead and run your errands. Just remember that you will be drug-tested before the insemination procedure, and from the minute you are inseminated, you will be closely supervised, Jamie. I want you to understand that. We want this baby so very much and will make sure that everything possible is done to assure a successful pregnancy.”

“Does that mean I will have no privacy?” Jamie asked.

Amanda shook her head. “Not at all, dear. But we do expect you to adhere to our wishes, and I hope you can see things from our viewpoint. Everything we know about you says that you are an exemplary young woman who has every intention of fulfilling her end of the bargain, but we have to make sure of that for our own peace of mind. Once we have ascertained a level of trust, you will have a reasonable amount of privacy, but you must realize that you are never to leave the premises unaccompanied or communicate with anyone outside the boundaries of the ranch.”

Jamie nodded and swallowed a dose of reality. These people seemed nice enough, but they were not going to be her new best friends. This was a business deal. She was a brood mare. They were paying to use her womb.

She had no best friends. She had only herself.

“I’d like to get a dog,” she said, surprising herself. Where had
that
come from?

“I beg your pardon,” Amanda said, a frown marring her smooth forehead.

“I want to bring a dog with me.”

“I didn’t realize that you had a dog.”

“I don’t. Not yet, at least. But I will by the time I leave for the ranch.”

“I see,” Amanda said, her lovely smile back in place. “Well, I think that’s a fine idea. Now, before we sign the contracts, I would like for us all to join hands and pray for the success of our endeavor.”

Amanda stood and waited while everyone else followed suit. She reached for Jamie’s hand and that of her husband, who in turn reached for Mr. Abernathy’s hand. That left only Lenora, who seemed unsure as to what she was going to do. Mr. Abernathy held his hand out to her, and with a shrug, she joined the circle, and Amanda began her prayer. “Our heavenly Father, we thank you for bringing us this innocent young woman. Bless the journey we are beginning with Jamie Long this day and continue to guide our footsteps as we carry out your bidding…”

The complete adoration in Amanda’s voice struck a cord in Jamie’s mind. She had heard that voice before. She opened her eyes and regarded the woman’s uplifted face. Her expression was one of pure rapture. Jamie had seen her before. On television. Praying, just as she was now.

Jamie joined the others in echoing Amanda’s “Amen.” Amanda opened her eyes and greeted Jamie’s gaze with a beatific smile.

Amanda’s prayer had touched Jamie’s heart. These were godly people. She would be safe with them.

Chapter Six

T
HEIR LAST NAMES
were different. She was Amanda Tutt Hartmann, spiritual leader of the Alliance of Christian Voters. He was Toby Travis and apparently also involved in the Alliance. They were constantly exchanging looks and touches, which led Jamie to believe that they were very much in love. The ring on Amanda’s finger was a simple gold band. For some reason that impressed Jamie. It seemed more sincere than an ostentatious show of diamonds.

With the contracts signed, arrangements discussed, and an envelope in her purse containing a ten-thousand-dollar cashier’s check and a post-office-box number, Jamie shook hands with Amanda and Toby. In a daze, she walked to the nearest bank.

It was really happening.

The plan she had hatched out of desperation had come to fruition. She was both relieved and…

And what?

Afraid, perhaps.

But what did she have to be afraid of?

Well, for one thing, pregnancy itself. And her own emotions. She was setting sail on an uncharted sea.

She opened a checking account and with a new checkbook, an ATM card, and more cash than she had ever carried in her life tucked in her purse, she walked back to the office, her mind racing ahead as she thought of all the things she needed to take care of during the upcoming week.

When she entered the law office, Lenora looked up from her computer. “You okay?” she asked.

Jamie nodded.

“The procedure—an inner-uterine insemination—is scheduled for Monday morning, and you will be required to give a urine specimen for a drug test before it takes place. Afterward I will be spending every minute with you until I deliver you to the airpark on Tuesday morning, at which time you will be flown to the ranch.”

“I want to check out of the hotel this afternoon,” Jamie said, “and move to someplace that will let me keep a dog.”

“I guess that’s okay. Just let me know where you are as soon as you’ve made the change, and I’ll arrange to have the room billed to the office. So, what kind of dog are you going to get?”

“A lonely dog.”

“Good idea,” Lenora said.

 

Jamie sat at the table in her hotel room and wrote checks to pay off her credit cards, a task that left her feeling giddy with relief.

It took her less than thirty minutes to pack and check out. She threw her suitcase on top of the pile of assorted possessions stored in the backseat of her car and drove first to a post office and then to a motel just across the river that claimed to be pet-friendly in its Yellow Pages ad.

Once she had checked in, she grabbed a sandwich and headed north on I-35.

The monument company was located near the cemetery. The late-afternoon sun beat down unmercifully as the stonecutter showed her through the display yard. Jamie chose a simple monument that looked much like the one Granny had placed on her husband’s grave all those years ago.

In the air-conditioned office, Jamie wrote out an inscription—just her grandmother’s name and dates. There was no way to say in a few words what an incredible woman she had been and how much she had been loved by the granddaughter she had raised. “But I would like for you to carve a bird over the inscription,” she told the stonecutter. “My grandmother loved birds.”

Her business concluded, Jamie drove into the cemetery and placed a rose on her grandmother’s bare grave. “I won’t be visiting you again for a long time, Granny,” Jamie said, “but I’ll think of you every day.”

It was dark when she returned to the motel. She walked to a nearby Mexican restaurant, where she had a platter of sizzling chicken fajitas and a plate of sopaipillas. She didn’t even wince when she looked at the check.

The next morning, she had her car serviced and bought four brand-new tires. Then she drove to an animal-rescue establishment on the far west side of the city.

“I can’t bear to look at the animals,” Jamie told the woman behind the desk. “I’m afraid I’ll want them all. Just bring me a nice, friendly dog that nobody else is going to want.”

The animal the woman brought was about as homely as a dog could be. One ear stood straight up and the other flopped over. He was a nondescript shade of grayish brown, and his coat appeared to have the texture of a Brillo pad. His legs seemed too long for his slender body, and the last three inches of his tail veered off at an angle. But the crooked tail was wagging, and his big brown eyes were looking up at Jamie with such hope. When she knelt in front of him, however, he cowered a bit and backed away. She held out her hand for him to sniff, and he took a tentative step forward, then she gently scratched his neck. And with great solemnity, the dog licked her chin.

“I love him,” Jamie declared.

The woman smiled. “He’s been with us for several months. Apparently he’d been fending for himself for some time when he was brought in. He was little more than skin and bones and had a serious case of mange. He’s about eight months old now, and I wouldn’t hazard a guess about his breeding. We’ve been calling him Ralph for no particular reason, but you can change that, of course.”

“No, Ralph is fine,” Jamie said.

She paid for his immunizations and neutering and was told that she could pick him up in the morning. “We’ll have him bathed and ready to go,” the woman said. “You’ll need to bring a collar and a leash.”

Jamie knelt in front of Ralph and explained that she would return for him tomorrow. “We’re going to be a family, you and me,” she promised. “And I hope you like to walk. I plan for us to walk miles and miles every single day.”

Jamie felt almost happy as she drove back to the motel. She would have a dog to keep her company during the strange journey on which she was embarking.

Perhaps it was just as well that Amanda Tutt Hartmann and Toby Travis did not plan to fawn over her and make her feel like a member of the family, Jamie decided. That would be dishonest of them, and she really didn’t want to have any sort of lasting relationship with them. It was better that way. Tidier.

 

She spent the following day getting to know her dog and taking him for his first walk at the end of a leash. He was smart and eager to please. “We’re going to get along just fine,” she told him. That evening she folded a blanket on the floor by the bed, and he dutifully curled up on it.

The next three days went by quickly.

She went shopping and bought socks, underwear, jeans, knit tops, hiking boots, a windbreaker, and a warm coat.

Twice she drove to a nearby greenbelt and took Ralph for an extra-long walk.

She visited the UT distance-learning office. The clerk told her that yes, the university still offered old-fashioned correspondence courses, although most of their students enrolled in online courses. Jamie left the office with a catalog of course offerings.

She spent one afternoon writing letters. The first was to her sister, Ginger. “I just wanted you to know that I’m okay but will not have a permanent address for a number of months. Please remember me to my nieces. I know you are so proud of them.”

Then she wrote to Charlene in California, two other high school friends, and her closest college friends, saying only that she had a “domestic” position with a wealthy family and would be living on their ranch and that she hoped to return to college next summer and would let them know when she had a permanent address.

And she wrote to Joe Brammer’s grandparents, thanking them for years of friendship and their help during her grandmother’s illness. “Tell Joe I said hello,” she added at the end.

She wondered what Joe would think of what she was doing. Would he be appalled? Or would he think she had made a sensible decision?

And she wondered if Joe was married yet. If he ever thought about her at all.

She recalled the day he stopped by the dry cleaner’s to tell her that he was going to get married. He had tried to make it seem like a by-the-way sort of announcement on his part and not something that he felt the need to tell her because there had been any sort of understanding between them. Which there hadn’t been. Not ever. But that was the last time she saw him, and if he thought of her as just a friend, wouldn’t he have continued to drop by to say hello when he was in the neighborhood?

Of course, only a few weeks later, she had taken her semester finals and gone home to take care of her dying grandmother, so she never had a chance to discern the nature of his exact feelings for her. But even if Joe had fostered some level of romantic feelings for her, apparently they weren’t deep enough or strong enough to keep him from wanting to marry someone else.

The afternoon before the insemination procedure, Jamie watched her car being loaded on to a flatbed truck for its journey to the Hartmann Ranch. That evening she purchased a carry-out meal at a nearby restaurant and tried to watch television but couldn’t concentrate. She paced for a while, which made Ralph nervous. Finally, she took a bath and crawled into bed. Ralph took his usual position on the blanket beside the bed, but she patted the place beside her. Once he had resituated himself, she put an arm around him and curled her body against his.

She wondered about tomorrow. Would Amanda and her husband be there? Or would Toby have been there earlier to…

She struggled for a term that was not indelicate to describe the act that Toby would be required to perform but could not come up with one. God, it was so weird. Toby would masturbate to provide the semen that would be used to impregnate her. She hoped that Toby had already left the clinic by the time she arrived. She would blush if she saw him. Which would be mortifying. Maybe he had already done his part. He’d said that he and Amanda traveled a lot. And mentioned a trip to Florida and then a ten-city “crusade.” Maybe she wouldn’t see him and Amanda again for weeks and weeks.

 

The next day, Dr. Betty Winslow showed Jamie the instruments she would be using and explained that Jamie might experience some discomfort but it would be over very quickly.

Jamie closed her eyes and tried to keep her mind blank while Dr. Winslow carried out the procedure.

Once it was completed, the examining table was tilted so that her feet were higher than her head, and she was told that she would need to remain in that position for a half hour. As Jamie lay there staring up at her feet, she wondered what the baby’s last name would be. Would he be given his father’s last name or his mother’s far more famous one?

Then she put such thoughts out of her head. The baby’s name was none of her business. She didn’t
want
to know its name. Didn’t want to know anything about it at all. Except that it was healthy. She would like to know that.

She wondered if a woman who had been penetrated by an instrument could still be considered a virgin. Would she someday have to explain to a man that she had never had sex but had given birth?

Or did one just keep such things a secret?

 

“How’d it go?” Lenora asked when Jamie entered the waiting room.

“Okay,” Jamie said. “I’m sorry you got stuck with making sure I don’t go on some sort of a binge.”

“No problem,” Lenora said, linking arms with her. “Let’s go treat ourselves to a wonderful dinner, then curl up in bed and watch a movie.”

They had dinner at T.G.I. Fridays, then watched a Harry Potter movie on pay-per-view and called it a night. Jamie knew that sleep was once again going to be difficult for her. She tried to put aside the events of the day so that she could mentally and emotionally prepare herself for tomorrow’s flight.

Jamie hadn’t flown in an airplane since those childhood trips that ended when her parents died in a plane crash. Her stomach was knotted with apprehension, and she was afraid to close her eyes lest she dream of planes plunging from the sky.

Finally she gave up on sleep. If it weren’t for Lenora in the other bed, she would have watched television or turned on the lamp and read. Ralph sensed her wakefulness and came to comfort her. She curled her body around his, and the next thing she knew, the alarm was going off. An hour later, she and Ralph were in Lenora’s car on their way to the airport.

The Hartmann airplane was a great deal larger than her father’s had been and had jet engines instead of propellers. The words
The Messenger
were painted in script on the side. Beneath the words was a golden cross.

The uniformed pilot and copilot introduced themselves. They were father and son—Russ was the father and Rusty the son. They were based in Virginia and flew regularly for Miss Hartmann and her brother, Russ explained.

Suddenly the moment of departure was at hand.

“You’ll be fine,” Lenora said. “Amanda and Toby are not your run-of-the-mill folks, but you will be well cared for.”

Jamie hugged Lenora and thanked her for everything. They promised to stay in touch, and yes, Jamie would let her know if she needed anything.

Ralph was hesitant about climbing up the steep steps, so the young copilot carried him. Jamie turned and waved at Lenora before entering the spacious cabin. No, this wasn’t like her father’s little airplane at all, she thought as she took in the easy chairs and individual television monitors. In the back were a conference table and chairs.

As soon as Jamie took her seat, Ralph jumped onto her lap. Jamie let him stay there, putting her arms around him and burying her face against his neck while the plane raced down the runway and lifted heavenward.

She avoided looking out the window during the short flight, but when she felt the plane bank and begin its descent, she moved to a window seat and looked down on the emptiest landscape she had ever seen. Not a house, not a road, not a hill, only an occasional clump of stunted mesquite along a creek bed. But already there were the beginnings of one of those spectacular sunsets Toby Travis had promised.

Then miraculously there was a landing field, and beyond it were a water tower, a silo, and rooftops emerging from an oasis of trees and cultivated fields. As they descended farther she spotted a large greenhouse and a trailer park.

The plane made a looping turn over the large L-shaped stone ranch house with a turreted tower. Behind the house were two swimming pools, one a large free-form pool with a small island in the center and the other a rectangular pool with swimming lanes. Beyond the pools were tennis courts. The place looked more like a resort than a home.

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