The Stargazers (5 page)

After placing
the last of her youth’s belongings
on the pile
, she sighed and turned to the group. “It’
s all ready for the fire
.” The three
watched with solemn and almost distracted expressions.

“You’ve made your first of many sacrifices as a woman,” Nanny Lily said.

“Everything seems to be about sacrifice.”

“Yes.”
The ancient crone regarded her with pitiless eyes
and then
conjured up an ember in her wrinkled palm. It cast shadows into t
he lines of her face, making
it
look like melting wax. She blew the small piece of fire
int
o the pile of kindling. It
caught quickly; Ellemire hadn’t seen any rain in over three months. It was the wo
rst drought
in Aster’s memory. As much as she wanted to doubt her role in the Great Mother prophecy, she couldn’t completely deny that the world was slowing down in some way. Drying out.
She just didn’t know if she was the one to fix it.

The purple yarn of her quilt went up in a blaze, igniting everything around it. Sparks swirled up into the evening sky
like
tiny
fireflies. “I guess it’s too late to turn back now,” Aster said. “I wouldn’t have any blankets to sleep with.”  She mea
nt it as a joke, but only the crickets answered.
Even her mother, the most positive influence in her life, was
as
obdurate
as a statue
.
Aster supposed this was no time for humor. Not with so much in the balance.

Did the people of Ellemire know what was happening tonight? Surely some of them must.
She imagined that in a kinder place, there would have been a celebration. Perhaps even a festival to rival that of Grah, complete with costumes, confetti and fireworks, hugs and kisses and tears and endless well-wishes.

But the world
was silent, the Star
gazers left alone to conduct
business no one wanted to acknowledge. For the first time in her
life, Aster felt truly lonely
.

Dahlia turned to her, and Aster saw that her eyes were shiny in the fire light
. “Are you ready?”

Ready? All the words from all of the lectures and lessons and fights leading up to this moment fled her mind with that question.
How could she ever be ready for something like this? The two women had
shared very little of their own adventures to the other side
, feeling that each Stargazer had to emerge into the other world as open and pure as a newborn baby
.
The clothing in her bags was the only indicator of what she could truly expect, and that wasn’t very heartening.

“If I said I wasn’t ready, it wouldn’t make any difference, would it?”

“
We can’t say no,” said Lily. “And
we can’t make you take the steps. Let your conscience guide you.”

And the final piece slammed home. After years of manipulation, both subtle and not, and they were leaving it up to her, or at least giving her the illusion of control. But she knew better. There was no turning back now.
And in her heart, she knew she needed to go. Not to save the world, but to save her sanity. She only hoped the world she would be entering would be free from the bickering, backbiting, and gossip that had come to define her life. And she longed to be away from Oleander, especially.

Taking a deep breath of clean night air, she stepped toward the path that would lead them deep into a part of the woods only the Stargazers knew, where the Tree of Doors
a
waited. Larkspur padded slightly ah
ead of her, like a guide
. Lily and Dahlia moved to each side and entwined their arms around hers. No one else in Ellemire was permitted to walk this path, and the Stargazers guarded it and the surrounding area with a unique barrier spell that only Lily could undo.

As they entered the woods, the wind picked up, blowing a chill up Aster’s skirts.
Dry branches and dead leaves crushing underfoot gave the impression of autumn in the height of summer.

They didn’t walk far before
Aster spied a multi-colored shimmer marking the clearing of the Tree of Doors. Pink, yellow, blue, and green beams swirled together in an aura around the enormous willow that served as the waypoint between two worlds. No one could say for sure how the Tree had come into existence, the secrets of its enchantments long lost in the endless tapestry of their world.

At the entry to the clearing, Aster froze with awe. She had never been this close to the Tree before, and the magic of the place was immense enough make every bone in her body
hum.
She looked at Nanny Lily, whose face looked almost youthful in the shimmering light. “May I move closer?”

Lily gave a simple nod and gestured with her arm as if to say, “Be my guest.”

She approached the willow with the utmost reverence. Hundreds of doorways hung
from
the branches, each
of
a different size, shape
and material. Some were just plain wooden rectangles, not unlike what
one would see on a house. Others were round and made of burnished metal
and big round rivets
, while some were tiny,
like odd
fruit
. Perhaps
they were
for birds or butterflies
, for Aster didn’t know of any people that small in Ellemire
. A closer look revealed that even some of the leaves
themselves were doors
.

It was faint, but Aster could hear a si
nging voice coming from all the doors
, each a different pitch and timbre, creating a harmony so beautiful
she nearly wept with the joy of it.
It was a choir of universes
.
Wondrous!

“I don’t think there is anything more beautiful in creation,” said Lily. Her normally authoritative voice was reduced to an awed half-whisper.

“Where do all of these doors go?”

“One can never possibly know. We Stargazers may only walk through one. The others are locked to us. There is a different door for every type of being.”

Aster tried to imagine what a universe made specifically for insects or horses must look like. How many creatures that she took for granted as Ellemire born had come through one of these doors?
How in the world did the Stargazers become custodians of this sacred place?
The questions were dizzying, but she knew there was no time for this sort of conversation.

“Which door will I be going through?”

Dahlia pointed straight ahead to the white door set into the trunk. It was rounded in the shape of the tree itself, and it had an opalescent gleam that was mesmerizing to look at. “The one that seems to unite all of the others together. It’s
the Door of All Doors.
”

Aster stepped toward it, but a strong hand caught her around the wrist. She turned to see Nanny Lily looking at her with an expression that was grave, even for her.
“Miss Ivy
is the one who
will be waiting for you on th
e other side to take you to the
boarding house. She is valuable to us. Treat her well.”

Aster nodded. They hadn’t told her much about this other world, but she at least knew about Miss Ivy, who ran a home for young girls.
Aster had never heard of such a place, but she hoped she would meet some friends there.
Ivy was from Ellemire
, and had long been in service to their family as an ambassador of sorts to the other side. How Ivy had come to be part of such an arrangement was yet another mystery the other women didn’t see fit to solve for her.

Lily
took Aster by the hand. “We have much to tell you, child, so listen closely
and do not interrupt me
. First, you mustn’t dawdle. It’s easy to lose yourself over there in that world’s many marvels, but your task is more important than any friend or fun you may encounter. Second, keep your heart about you. The beau you meet will not be able to come back here with you. He must never know who you are or where you truly come from, or both our worlds will be put into
great
peril.”

But what about
Quercus?
She restrained herself
from asking. It would have only angered the old woman. Aster’s
time for arguing was done. “Yes, Nanny Lily.”

Dahlia spoke up next. “If you need to send a message
to us
, Larkspur
will deliver it for you.
Unless so
mething goes wrong
, you are not permitted to come back here until you’ve kindled a child.”

Aster had heard all of this before. They were stalling, but why? A bud of anxiety began to bloom in her gut.
“Is that everything?”

The two
crones looked at each other, and then Lily spoke. “Your mother and I
have debated
long and hard about
whet
her to share this information until you returned
. I wanted to wait, for I think you’re too willful and stubborn a
s it is
. But your mother seems to think that if we treated you more like the woman we want you to be, that you would be that woman.”

Aster’s heart began to pound hard and fast. “Okay. What is it?”

Dahlia took her hand
. “The child you have isn’t going to be like any other child born in Ellemire. She’s going to be a vessel brimming with the Old Magic. Very powerful. ”

“Yes, I know,” said Aster.

N
anny Lily shook her head.
“No, you don’t know, child. Shut up and liste
n.” She took a deep breath that was so unlike her that Aster felt gooseflesh ripple up her arms.
“Your child will not be permitted to live. The only way you can release
the Old Magic within her
and save
our world is if you sacrifice her
upon the Giving Altar.”

Aster stood frozen in shock as the word sunk in. Sacrifice. As in blood sacrifice? The ancients in Ellemire had performed such rituals, but they were no part of modern magic craft. It was almost too absurd to believe. “I… I have to
kill my baby?”

Lily nodded. “It
is written
.
I am sorry, child.
”

Aster’s insides were a torrent of agony and anger.
“But how could you exp
ect me to do this? I can’t just
murder my own child! Could
you
?”

Dahlia had since turned her gaze to the ground, but Aster c
ould see tears on her mother cheeks
reflecting the colored light
that now seemed as distant and unimportant as a dim star. Nanny Lily’s gaze, however, stayed level and stern. Now that she was free of the burden of that particular secret, she seemed stronger.
“Your mother believed you were woman enough to handle this information. Are you saying she was wrong?”

“Woman enough? I can’t believe what I’m hearing! You’re a monster!” She backed down the path, away from them and the Tree of Doors. “You can’t make me do this. You won’t!” She was panting so fast that she’d soon start to hyperventilate. The little bit of food she’d eaten that day was churning in her st
omach. Soon it would be looking for a way out, just as she was. S
he turn
ed to run back down the path, toward the house, and
a wall of fire
sprung up now three feet before her. It was
hot enough to pull the skin of her face tight.

Aster screamed and stumbled away to avoid being burned and fell to the forest
floor
.
She heard her mother cry out, but couldn’t care less. The
flames
encircled the three of them
. Lily’s
eyes blazed bright with the magic she was wielding. The Tree must have been giving her a new energy, for Aster had never seen the old woman look so powerful. Aster, who had never dabbled much in the way of magic, aside from a few handy gardening charms, felt defeated.

“Stand up and face me, child.”

Aster slowly climbed to her feet and held her grandmother’s gaze, despite her newfound fear of the woman.

“You asked if I would have been able to kill my baby had I been required to. That deserves an honest answer. I had three babies at once, only one of which hasn’t shamed me. There were signs even as an infant that Oleander was going to be trouble. She was born with stark white hair and a full set of teeth. She could speak before she even learned to crawl. Almost any woman in Ellemire would have drowned such a child as a demon, bu
t I couldn’t do it, even though
she was as cruel and ruthless as one. I can’t even count the number
of animals she butchered or many times she’d poisoned me before the age of ten.
I now know that sacrificing Oleander would have made the world a better place. If I could go back and do it now, I would
n’t hesitate
.”