The (sort of) Dark Mage (Waldo Rabbit) (30 page)

BOOK: The (sort of) Dark Mage (Waldo Rabbit)
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Chapter 22

 

Roger The Hedgewizard

 

“Will you look at the tits on her?” Edwin said quietly.

 

He and his two friends were at the Inn, having a few tankards of ale, when a white wizard and his woman came in. They had made a bit of a scene but were now just eating. The three men had trouble taking their eyes off of her.

 

“Ought to be careful,” Marcis said. “I heard her say she was his wife. Don’t want to mess with no of them sort.”

 

“Roger’s not so bad.” Edwin pointed out.

 

“He is a local sort, not one a them white ones.” Marcis said. “Them sort is wise and quick to anger.”

 

“I wanna grab dem tits,” their friend Joster slurred. He’d already downed four tankards of ale and his eyes were swimming. He was a big man and used to getting his way.

 

“Go ahead then, I dare you.” Edwin said.

 

“Ah no.” Marcis said softly.

 

“You dare me fooker?” Joster got up on unsteady legs. “I’ll show ya.” He began to stumble towards the table where the White Mage and his woman were seated.

 

“This be a bad idea.” Marcis said

 

Joster paid no attention though and Edwin was clearly anticipating what was about to happen.

 

The couple didn’t notice Joster’s lumbering approach until he leaned over and clamped down both hands on the girl’s shoulder.

 

Her reaction was immediate.

 

“Eek!” She yelled at the top of her lungs and smashed a fist into his chin. Marcis and Edwin watched as their beefy friend was launched off his feet and into the air to land in an unconscious heap.

 

“She took him down in one punch?” Edwin said disbelieving.

 

“Now that be a healthy gal!” Marcis sounded impressed.

 

The wizard was still seated with a forkful of food halfway to his mouth. He lifted a hand in the direction of the Innkeeper. “We’ll be going now.”

 

XXX

 

The two of them were headed out of the village in the direction where the local magic user Roger was supposed to reside.

 

“Did you really have to hit him that hard?” Waldo asked.

 

They’d been forced to shovel the rest of their meal down and quickly leave. While Waldo was all for committing crimes to build his reputation, he would rather do so without inciting another mob.

 

“He grabbed me!”

 

“I know, but couldn’t you have been just a bit more reserved?”

 

“How would you like it if some fat hairy oaf suddenly grabbed you?” Alice demanded.

 

“I wouldn’t. Well, unless he was a masseuse.”

 

Alice sent him an ugly glare.

 

“The point is you didn’t need to go that far. You are a succubus, even in this form you are a lot stronger than an ordinary human being.”

 

“I can’t help it! I have always been that way when men tried to touch me. As soon as my body started to develop Elsa tried to make me one of her girls. When a customer would start to touch me my instinct was to beat him off.”

 

“That’s not normal for a succubus.”

 

“Well pardon me for not wanting to be molested! I grew up seeing men as beasts and I didn’t want any of them doing those sorts of things to me!”

 

“You didn’t react that way when we first met.”

 

Alice’s face blushed slightly. “Well of course not darling, you were my savior, and you wanted to marry me. I’m fine with you touching me; it’s just all the other men in the world I can’t stand.”

 

“I feel honored. You mean to say whenever a man touches you this is how you react?”

 

“A woman has a right to defend herself.”

 

“How did you manage working where you were then?”

 

“Everyone who worked there was a woman. The regulars knew better than to grab. Occasionally there’d be a customer who would grope me, but he never did it more than once. Elsa always threatened to whip me for causing trouble, but the men all still liked me.”

 

“Makes a certain amount of sense, we always want what we can’t have.”

 

XXX

 

They had no real trouble finding the path that led to the hedgewizard’s home. It soon took them to a plain cottage with an expansive garden near the edge of the village.

 

“This must be where Roger lives.” Alice said.

 

“It is.” Waldo said with certainty, as his eyes glanced about.

 

“Something wrong darling?”

 

“I can sense him inside. All magic users can sense each other. That means he can sense me as well, he should have come out to greet me.”

 

“I’m sure that’s…”

 

She was cut off by a monstrous roar.

 

Out of the forest a massive green lizard, at least thirty feet long and fifteen feet high, came stampeding. Black smoke puffed from its nostrils, it bore its foot long sharpened teeth, and snapped its tail around furiously.

 

“Is that a dragon?” Alice immediately jumped in front of Waldo to place her body between him and the monster.

 

“It certainly looks like one.” He replied calmly.

 

“Run darling! I’ll protect you!” She was about to transform.

 

“It’s all right.
Descoros
.” Waldo spoke a single word of magic and made a sign with two fingers of his left hand.

 

Immediately the giant lizard’s form began to blur, its roar was muted and as it continued to charge it grew more and more indistinct. Then it was gone.

 

Alice stood there gaping a the suddenly empty wood.

 

“Damn it, I was hoping that would scare you off.” Out of the building stepped a balding, middle aged man with a wide gait. He was dressed in dirty trousers and an over shirt that was half tucked in.

 

“The hedgewizard Roger I presume?” Seeing his appearance made Waldo’s opinion of him drop even further. “A dragon? Why not something more subtle? Like a giant or an army of goblins”

 

“It worked on a bunch of bandits.” The balding man said with a frown. “Hedgewizard? There’s no need to be rude you know, just because I’m not from Avalon doesn’t make me less of a magic user than you.”

 

“Sorry, I’m a White Mage, so I always think I’m better than everyone else.”

 

Roger grunted. “First time I’ve ever heard one of your kind admit to that.”

 

“Uhm, excuse me?” Alice waved her hand to get their attention. “What happened to the dragon?”

 

“I dispelled it.” Waldo said.

 

“What does that mean?”

 

Roger gave her his full attention, his eyes slid up and down her figure and then halted on her chest.

 

“The dragon was an illusion, I was hoping to scare you off. Of course, that was before I got a good look at you. I am Roger the Magnificent, what is your name lovely lady?”

 

She crossed her arms and made a point to stand behind Waldo. “My name is Alice Rabbit, and this is my husband Waldo Rabbit.”

 

“Husband?” He spared Waldo an envious glance. “You are a lucky man.”

 

“I know, being a White Mage.”

 

Roger raised a perplexed eyebrow while Alice shook her head.

 

“Well since you are both here why don’t you come inside?”

 

XXX

 

The inside of Roger’s home was no more impressive than the outside. There was a fire pit for warmth and cooking. There was a rickety table with four stools and a pile of furs that served as a bed. The floor was dirt with some straw scattered on top of it.

 

The slaves in Castle Corpselover live better than this.

 

When the three of them sat down about the table Roger sat as close to Alice as he could. He kept openly staring at her chest.

 

“Your illusion was quite good.” Waldo said.

 

“Not good enough though obviously. How did you know it was an illusion?”

 

“It was a dragon.”

 

Roger gave another sour grunt. “Do you even know how to talk to someone without insulting them?”

 

“No, comes from being a White Mage. By the way do you know we’re plotting to take over the world?”

 

Alice shook her head.

 

“You’re a lot more direct than the other whites I’ve met. So is this where you start in about, ‘unity, justice and peace’?”

 

“Do you want me to?”

 

Roger narrowed his eyes. “I’ve met two White Mages before, and they both tried to convince me to go to Avalon and study with them. All they would talk about was unity, justice, and peace. They went on and on about how wonderful the world would be one day, once everyone was on their side. No more war, no more poverty or crime. Get rid of all the monsters and all the Dark Mages and everything wrong with the world will be fixed.”

 

“Why do you have to get rid of all the monsters?” Alice demanded.

 

Roger looked at her in surprise. “You’re married to a White Mage, hasn’t he explained their philosophy to you?”

 

“I’ve tried but she is not very smart. Honestly I just keep her around to warm my bed.”

 

Thump.

 

Waldo managed to not shout in pain as he was kicked beneath the table.

 

Not noticing Roger nodded. “Lucky man.”

 

“Yes, that’s me, I’m drowning in luck.” Waldo tried to rub his shin without making it too obvious.

 

“If you’ve come here to try and recruit me the answer is still no. I’m happy right here.”

 

“Really?” Waldo pointedly looked about the cramped, dirty interior. “You obviously have some skill. Why not find yourself a patron who can properly reward you?”

 

“Because this is my home, and these are the people I’ve grown up with. I like being able to help them. Just seeing them happy is reward enough.”

 

“No, seriously, why do you stay here?”

 

“That is the reason.”

 

“Do you rule over them and make them do your bidding?”

 

“Of course not! They are my neighbors, my friends, when they need my help I am there and they pay me whatever they can. When outsiders come here I’ll charge them, but the most important thing to me is the welfare of my village.”

 

“So what you are saying is you take care of these villagers without demanding anything more than the bare minimum from them in return? That you see their wellbeing as your true reward?”

 

“That’s right.”

 

Waldo sighed. “Fine, don’t tell me.”

 

“Darling, you’re being rude.”

 

“Me being rude? He’s the one lying to my face, and not even doing a good job of it.”

 

“You know the other two White Mages who came here were pretty haughty, but you outdo them. I swear you’re almost as bad as a Dark Mage!”

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