The Skilled Seduction (37 page)

“My guess is that he deliberately kept it hidden from you,” Victoria placed her hand atop Gwen’s.
 
“Tristan is damaged, Gwen. He requires more than I alone can offer him. He needs you.”

Resting her head on her sister-in-law’s shoulder,
 

Gwen released a ragged sigh.

“His heart was broken long before Eve’s betrayal,” Victoria continued. “What she did simply ensured that he would never allow himself to love anyone else.”

Victoria swallowed hard. She was receiving the punishment she deserved. For selfishly pursuing a man who didn’t love her, for irrationally believing that she could repair him, for being so reckless with her virtue, and most importantly, for her part in her father’s death.

Yes, somewhere in hell the eighth Duke of Davenport was enjoying his daughter’s steep fall from grace. It was only fitting after what she and her mother had done to him, the secret that the Dowager Duchess of Davenport had taken to her grave, the life-shattering event that Victoria had hidden from everyone for so long.

Her night with Tristan, though scandalous, was simply one more reason for her to repent.

Dear God, please forgive me my sins.

Even though she knew God to be merciful, Victoria doubted that He would excuse her part in murder.

* * *

Tristan’s hurried footfalls resounded against the stone beneath his feet as he walked onto the terrace, inhaling the crisp air in one fortifying breath. His wife had been drastically different towards him since her discussion with Gwen.

To their guests, she was a perfect hostess, smiling and laughing at all the appropriate times yet Tristan knew that her smiles and laughter never quite met her eyes. She was playing a role, he realized with trepidation. Something must have occurred since the last time he had been by her side.

“I hoped to find you alone,” Gwen’s usually gentle cadence was rigid and unnerving, causing Tristan’s abdomen to clench into a tight knot of apprehension as she approached.
 

In spite of his intuition silently screaming that something was indeed wrong, he paused in an effort to keep his tone composed. “Thank you so much, Gwen, for holding this ball in honor of Victoria and me. I am so grateful to you and Sebastian both.”

“In hindsight, you should have apprised me of your latest London activities before I created the guest list,” Gwen suggested.

Tristan suspected that Victoria now knew the truth, though precisely how much of it his was still unknown. Damn him. He had been so caught up in marrying her, in making it all appear respectable, that he hadn’t taken the time to prepare for the obvious revelations. Things had progressed too quickly and he had been far too complacent. His sister’s harsh expression told him so.

As if noting his comprehension, Gwen announced, “Victoria and I both overheard gossips reveling in your disgrace.”

Tristan leaned back against the cool stone balustrade, clutching it tightly, certain his knuckles had turned white as pure unadulterated rage coursed through his veins. “Lady Markham, I presume?” his words dripped with venom.

Nodding, Gwen crossed her arms over her chest. “You should have told us, me and your wife – especially your wife. What possessed you, Tristan?”

“I thought I had more time,” he silently cursed himself as he shrugged off his jacket and placed it over his sister’s shoulders, lest she become chilled. “I was so preoccupied with obtaining Victoria by all means necessary and averting scandal that I failed to consider that she would discover anything on this particular evening.”

“Your wife isn’t a possession to ‘
obtain,
’” Gwen chastised him with her icy tone. “Despite what our laws say to the contrary.”

“You sound like Victoria,” he mused – two peas in a pod, his sister and his wife. For the first time in a very long time, he opened his heart to his twin. “I needed her, Gwen. How could I not? Victoria is intelligent, vivacious, kind, witty, brave and beautiful. She is effervescent, illuminating even the dullest of rooms by her very presence.”
 

Tristan raked his hands through his hair. “She is also incredibly stubborn. Hell, she infuriates me one moment and leaves me desperate for her the next. It became obvious to me quite early on that I couldn’t allow her
not
to marry me – I don’t give a damn how antiquated that may sound. Such was my reality at the time.”

Gwen leaned against the stone balustrade next to him, studying his profile. “You love her. I know it and so do you. Isn’t it time you made the admission, at least to yourself?”

“It is a great deal more complicated than that,” Tristan met her intense stare.

“You don’t want to be vulnerable. I understand.”

Her empathy was worse than her anger in his opinion. He didn’t want his sister’s compassion. Her next question sliced him through to his core. “Why did Lachlan beat you?”

As if sensing his shock, Gwen explained, “Your wife confided in me about your scars.”

“Victoria shouldn’t have done so,” Tristan tried to keep his tone in check since this was a topic he never wished to discuss with his sister.

“Why?” she paused for a long moment. When he failed to respond, Gwen grabbed his arm and pulled him closer. “Was it because of me? Did he discover you had been tutoring me?”

Tristan chucked his sister on her chin, offering her a reassuring grin. “I will never burden you with this, Gwen.”

“I know you well enough to realize that your attempt at dissuading me was a confirmation,” Gwen said, her tone more gentle than her words. “An explanation is the least I deserve.”

Turning his attention to the gas lamps illuminating the garden below in shadows, Tristan admitted at last what he never wanted his sister to know. “Yes, Lachlan discovered I was secretly tutoring you. He insisted I stop, however, I refused. With each of our sessions, I received a lashing.”

His twin’s sharp intake of breath relayed her horror. “I always knew you took great risks in tutoring me. Had I known what he was doing to you—”

“That is why I never told you.” He had hidden the repulsive truth for so long, to spare his sister from pain, and yet it still managed to reveal itself. The knowledge made his stomach churn. “How much did that viper tell Victoria?”

“We overheard Lady Markham holding court in the powder room. Discussing how your reputation is damaged to the point that your career is in jeopardy.”

Tristan waited for his sister to continue, his muscles taut.

“Victoria knows that the majority of the
ton
feels that you married her to save your reputation. Lady Markham called Victoria a ‘
naïve, unsuspecting girl,’
which wounded your wife more than I ever thought possible. Until Lady Markham revealed that the
ton
pities her because of your illegitimate child, consummated with a Madame. A child you refuse to claim as your own.”

“Damn it to bloody hell,” Tristan pounded his fist against the stone balustrade. He wanted to kill the damned old bat who took great pains in gossiping at Victoria’s expense.

Gwen grabbed his arm, leading Tristan to the tall shrubs of the gardens. “No more lying to me, do you understand? I want the truth and I want it now.”

They reached a bench within the garden maze, the tall hedges buffering them from outsiders, when Gwen cornered him. “None of this makes sense, Tristan. A man who would take beating upon beating as opposed to a simple decision to stop educating his sister wouldn’t shun his own child. Nor would a man who had taken his grandfather’s dwindling estates and turned them into a fortune be so indolent, all but casting aside his career. What are you hiding?”

He opened his mouth but before he could form the words his sister added, “Do not lie to me. Not again. I will not abide any more lies.”

“It is complicated,” Tristan admitted.

“Try me,” she said, her words thick with sarcasm. “I bet I can keep up. I had a wonderful tutor.”

Tristan clasped his hands behind his neck and looked upward, at the constellations twinkling above them. “Some is accurate , but very little. I did have a dalliance with a Madame. It set forth a dangerous course of events that placed my reputation in a poor light. I allowed everyone to believe the child was mine.”

Gwen’s brow furrowed, visible even in shadow and Tristan knew he had a choice – alleviate his sister’s confusion by admitting the truth or lie to her. He chose to tell the truth. Of course it was the least Gwen deserved, but it also came from his complete exhaustion stemming from his many machinations.
 

He just couldn’t keep up this charade any longer, at least not with his sister.

“I do love Victoria.” It was the first time he’d admitted it aloud and his words hovered in the crisp air. “Christ, I ran from her for so long, believing Victoria to be unattainable and in the end loving her was inevitable. She is my lifeblood. But I made a decision long before I married her and can’t turn back now because it would endanger too many people including my wife.”

“Your wife deserves the truth,” Gwen said softly. “These rumors, these lies, are going to destroy her, Tristan. You must see that.”

Tristan did indeed comprehend that. But he also recognized the danger that lurked behind the gentle façade of several members of so-called polite society. He had to proceed with caution and told his sister such.

Only after he’d been assured of Gwen’s complete silence, did they return to the ballroom. The hour was late and guests had already begun to depart.

Tristan scanned the room in search of his wife, finding her in the far corner chatting with Eve, Colin and Sebastian. Their families had formed a protective barrier between her and the rest of the
ton
, he noted with relief.

This night must have been so humiliating for her. His heart felt bruised at the reminder of how much his wife had endured. Silently vowing to make it up to her, Tristan racked his brain for a way to do just that.

Victoria would demand answers and Tristan’s body tensed with dread for he would never be able to be completely honest.

Damn him for committing himself to these secrets and for ignoring the signs two years ago that his heart would belong to Victoria. But he had done so and it was too late to turn back now.
 

Besides, a child lives because of his deceptions. He must remember that because he suspected his next conversation with his wife would make him feel like the biggest debauched arse in all of England.

Even though he’d allow her to believe the lies, he must remind himself of the truth.

He was protecting his wife and the child by keeping his mouth shut.

Tristan must never forget it.

Chapter 17

Tristan stood on the terrace of his study, or should he say his father’s study at Ainsley? Though dead, the man’s malicious presence still lingered in the hellish place.

How he detested this structure and all of the memories it roused. Tristan had spent his life running from them, pushing his past aside in a desperate attempt to forget.

Being in the location where it all began made everything worse. That was the reason he had never stayed here, even when visiting his sister nearby. He hated these walls as much as he despised the man who beat him.

This manor, and their estate in Scotland, had seen the worst of Tristan’s abuse. After his mother died, his father’s rage was palpable. At the time, Tristan thought it was from grief but now he knew the truth. It was because of his mother’s tryst and his brother’s paternity. Odd that Colin never received any of the physical abuse. No, that was left for Tristan, the man’s actual blood relation. Then there were the many lashes he took because he dared tutor his sister. He took each and every one of them, never once allowing his father to know just how painful they were.

Tristan was a liar even then, well before he was old enough to understand. That is how he was able to destroy his good reputation with very little effort over the course of two seemingly short years. Who wouldn’t believe his penchant for meaningless romps with a skilled Madame? When the child was presented to him, he did what was necessary. He perjured himself, caring not about the barrage of innuendo and hearsay.

Only three people knew the truth, his reasoning behind it, and understood that he wasn’t the immoral, corrupt man the
ton
considered him to be. Tonight that number of those who understood the truth increased to four with his admission to Gwen.

His sister was correct, of course. Victoria had been placed in the middle of his mess and she did deserve the truth. But she also deserved to be safe. As he explained to his sister tonight, the threat was formidable.

How he wished it were different, that he had behaved differently for Victoria. Tristan wished he had told her of his London reputation before Lady Markham had ambushed her.

The one event he didn’t regret, though, was how he handled the child because Tristan was left with no other choice at the time. His untruth helped keep the little girl safe and he would continue to rebuff the paternity claim because it was far too late to change the plan now. The situation had become far too treacherous and he would protect the child and his wife at all costs, even if Victoria didn’t understand or, worse yet, loathed him for it.