The Shadow Matrix (43 page)

Mikhail's was one she could always recognize instantly.

What are you doing up at this hour, Mik?
The silk hangings in her room made it a little

difficult to "hear" him, but she was too languid from her meal to move to another room

in the Tower just now.

I
wish I knew. Longing for you and feeling very frustrated I suppose.

Oh, Mik!
Margaret knew that something was bothering him, something that had been

fretting his mind since he returned to Thendara, and she wondered what it was. She

remembered how he had never really told her what was

going on at Halyn House until it was all over, and felt mildly troubled by this

exclusion. She had thought she and Mikhail could talk about anything! But it was

likely something to do with the Elhalyn children, and he probably did not think she

was interested.

I just love it when you go all maidenly on me.

I know. It puffs up your male ego, doesn't it?

Don't be a cat! How are you?

Much the same. I keep learning and learning and finding out how little I know. And

dreaming, too. Speaking of dreams, you really must stop yearning after me. People are

beginning to talk!

Let them. Besides, I can't help it. I never wanted to be Romeo, but between my father

and yours
—

I know, I know. At least we aren't young and stupid, and we won't take poison or

anything.

No, if I were going to use poison, it would not be on myself. But speaking, of dreams, I

had one a couple of nights ago.

Yes, I remember.

Not that one, you wicked woman. Occasionally I do dream about something other than

you. And this one was peculiar, though at the time I didn't think about it very much.

Since I came back to Thendara, there has been so much going on that a dream didn't

have much priority. But I had it again tonight, oh, maybe two hours ago. Maybe it

wasn't the same dream, but. . . there was this voice both times.

Deep, resonant, like the earth groaning?

Yes. How did you
...

I
heard it, too. I heard my name
—
or a version of it. Let me think here. Ah, yes, It

called to "Margarethe."

Uh-huh. I heard "Mikhalangelo" in my dream, not Mik

hail. The pronunciation was strange. ,

Well, you are one of the Lanart Angels. Did you hear anything else?

Just one word
—
Midwinter.

Midwinter?
Margaret was surprised by this, and mildly disappointed, for she had

expected Mikhail to tell her he had heard Hali. It was as if they had each been given

parts of a puzzle, as if each of them had a piece, but had to join together to solve it.
Is

there anything special about Midwinter? I don't know enough about Darkovan

customs yet.

It's a festival time, but the only thing I can think of that is special about the coming one

is that the four moons of Darkover will all be visible
—
well, not really, since it tends to

be even cloudier in winter than in summer
—
at the same time on Midwinter Eve.

How often do the moons appear at one time, Mik?
Astronomy was a mystery to her,

and Margaret knew it. She understood music, but thinking in three dimensions was

beyond her.

Only a couple of times a generation, but it hasn't happened at Midwinter in hundreds

of years. The street-corner fortunetellers are all abuzz with it, or I wouldn 't have

known at all. Priscilla Elhalyn was very fond of fortune tellers, and I suppose that

made me more aware of the gossip than I would have been before.
His mental voice

had a grim quality now.

My poor Mik! If only
...

If only Uncle Regis hadn't stuck me with the Regency.

Listen, Mik, we had similar dreams, but in mine I didn't hear a word about Midwinter.

What did you hear then?

Hall

There was a sound in her mind, a kind of mental sigh. I
should have guessed, shouldn't

I? We both knew when we saw the Tower that someday we were going there.

Mik, no one is going to let us go running off into a ghost of a Tower, and you know it!

You are just looking for any excuse to get away from the mess that. . . that your uncle

put you in.
She hated criticizing Regis Hastur, even slightly, but sometimes she could

not help herself. And, at the same time, she sensed that Mikhail was disturbed about

something else.

Of course I am! But that is neither here nor there. Do you really think we have any

choice? Use your Aldaran Gift and tell me we don't do this thing, and I swear I'll

never mention it again.

I don't know if I can, Mik. The Alton Gift is fairly straightforward. I can turn it off and

on and either force rapport or not, as 1 choose. But the Aldaran Gift of foresight. . .

that's a very different kettle offish. It's random. I don't have much control over it yet. I

can't just. . . access it like a computer or something.

No, I suppose not. I just remember how you saw Ariel's unborn daughter back at

Armida the day that . . .

The day that Domenic had his accident. It is all right to say it.
The grief of memory

blossomed in her mind.
I was almost out of my mind, between Gabe's demanding that I

marry him instantly and the rest. I've never had a vision that strong again, and frankly,

I would be glad if I never did.

I can understand that. I suppose it doesn't matter
—
but the dream had such urgency!

Suddenly Margaret did not want to talk about the dream any longer, and she changed

the subject.
How are the Elhellions faring in Thendara?

Alain and Vincent have been removed to Arilinn, where they are being looked after

properly. I confess I am greatly relieved to be free of that particular responsibility.

Emun seems to be fine
—
he has gained a few pounds and no longer looks like a ghost.

I just wish I felt more confident of him. And the girls are wonderful. Young Dani has

fallen completely in love with Miralys, and Lady Linnea is watching them as if they

were a pair of breeding hawks. Valenta, on the other hand, regards me as the paragon

of manly virtues. I must warn you, dearest, that she will likely be quite rude to you

when you arrive here, seeing you as her rival.

It is a pity you cannot marry her, and keep me for a
barragana.

Marguerida! What a shocking thing. I love it when you say unseemly things.

I know you do
—
which just encourages me! We must just wait, I suppose. I will be in

Thendara soon.

Not soon enough for me! Good night.

Sleep well, Mikhail, with no more dreams to trouble you.

Mikhail vanished from her mind, leaving only the tenderness of his parting thought.

She sat and savored it for a long time, knowing that it might be all she ever had of

Mikhail Hastur. And if Neskaya did not become snowbound, she would be with him

soon.

The room was cold now, and growing colder by the minute. Margaret noticed this and

realized it was not that the temperature was falling, but that something was chilling her

down to the bone. It was only a dream, and she did not have to think about it. But the

sense of destiny gripped her in spite of her efforts to dislodge it.

"Hali at Midwinter,"
she whispered.

17

Winter arrived in Thendara on Mikhail's heels, and kept him confined in Comyn Castle

for weeks. At first he had not minded, glad to be in a warm bedchamber, with good

meals cooked and served at regular intervals, and the children seen to by people more

skilled than himself. But after the dream he seemed to have shared with Marguerida,

he became restless and irritable. What did it mean? And who had called to him?

Mikhail discovered that his recent experiences at Halyn House had left him with a

powerful distaste for the supernatural, and at the same time, a great curiosity about it.

The voice in the dream was all too reminiscent of the bellowing of the Guardian,

roaring in his mind. He had a sinking feeling that he did not have a choice—something

was going to happen whether he wanted it or not.

With time on his hands, Mikhail had consulted Yoris MacEvers, the archivist at Comyn

Castle and had read as much as he could about Hali Tower before it was destroyed. It

was a frustrating search, for so much had been lost during the centuries, and what there

was seemed vague and not terribly useful. There might be more at Arilinn, but he did

not feel he could ride off, even if the weather had allowed it, leaving Regis with a

castle full of Aldarans and small children.

Everyone in the snow-bound castle was irritable, except the Elhalyn children, who

were settling in nicely. And Mikhail knew the situation would not improve when his

parents arrived. After several days of being on his best behavior, playing chess with

Gisela and listening to
Dom
Damon's opinions on seemingly everything, he sank into a

foul mood. Mikhail did not let it show, but it wore him down, to smile and smile, when

he just wanted to be left alone.

The more time he spent with
Dom
Damon, the more Mikhail .wondered at his uncle's

wisdom in suggesting that the Aldarans should return to Darkovan society. It was

obvious that the old fellow had some ideas that would infuriate his father and other

conservatives, that he was ambitious for power, and frustrated by the long exile of his

family. Unlike his son Robert, who had not yet arrived in Thendara, he seemed to lack"

patience.

It was clear, as well, that
Dom
Damon assumed that there would be a marriage

between Mikhail and Gisela in the near future. Since his meeting with Regis, Mikhail

had felt constrained to hold his tongue. He did not say that he would refuse such an

alliance, since he knew that his uncle wanted to keep Damon happy. And there was no

polite way he could tell Gisela to abandon any hopes she might hold. It was hard

enough to endure her attentions as it was.

One evening, in his cups,
Dom
Damon had expressed his feelings about Regis, and

they were not particularly respectful. Mikhail wondered if Regis knew how Lord

Aldaran felt about him. Since very little that went on in Comyn Castle escaped his

uncle's notice, he thought he must. He could only hope Regis was not bothered by it.

Gisela had brought both of her children with her on the trip to Thendara, and while the

older boy languished in the Terran Medical Center, the younger one was at Comyn

Castle. For several days, Mikhail had not seen the boy, but when he did, one afternoon,

he found that little Rakhal was at the sticky stage of his development. How little

Rakhal managed this fresh from his bath was a complete mystery to Mikhail. But with

his new interest in parenting, Mikhail allowed the child to sit on his lap, pat his face,

and discourse on such matters as appealed to his young mind.

He found that Gisela shrank away from Rakhal, and was impatient with him. It was

obvious to him that she did not not like the child, or perhaps that she did not like

children in general. Mikhail tried to be charitable, but his recent memories of Priscilla

Elhalyn's neglect of her children, had made him acutely sensitive on this subject. He

put Gisela's behavior down to an aversion for her dead husband, and bit his tongue

when she pulled away from the grubby but sweet little boy.

For his own part, Mikhail spent as much time as he could

with the youngest Elhalyns, who were now healthier and less anxious. One afternoon

he took Emun and his sisters on a tour of Comyn Castle—they did not cover half of it

before they were exhausted—and he was surprised at the questions they asked him.

Some he could not answer, such as who had built the great, White pile. Others he

could, and did. Emun remained nervous and strained, jumping at shadows and loud

noises. Mikhail swallowed the despair that rose in his throat whenever he looked at the

lad.

It was with great relief that he awoke to see just a hint of sun breaking through the

clouds one morning. Mikhail pushed aside his blankets, dressed hastily, and headed for

the stables without bothering with breakfast. A good ride would blow the cobwebs out

of his mind, stretch his legs, and get him away from all the intrigues of the Castle.

As he strode out onto the snowy steps leading to the Stable Court, Mikhail drew a deep

breath of clean air, and felt its crispness on his cheeks. Then he walked down the stairs

and started across the cobbles.

Mikhail saw a figure, dressed for riding, standing on the cobblestones, and his heart

sank. Gisela had clearly had the same thought as he, or perhaps anticipated his

decision. She had her back to him, and he almost turned around and went back inside,