The Secret (3 page)

Sophie

After hearing Jack’s story, I’m speechless and completely drained emotionally. We sit on the ground for a long time and he holds me, letting me c
ry over our lost time together.

When I pull away, he gently wipes the tears away from my face. Holding my gaze, we take our time letting everything sink in as
we study each other’s features.

“
Listen Soph,” he starts quietly after a long while of silence. “I know you’ve been through a lot. I know that things between us aren’t exactly… I know that you… God, this is so hard, Sophie,” he whispers, rubbing his palms over his eyes in an attempt to keep his composure.

“What d
o you want to ask me, Jack?”

“Is he good to you?” he blurts out nervously, trying to hide the emotion in his eyes.
“Are you happy, Baby?”

“Yes,” I ad
mit quietly as I take his hand in mine.

Jack r
ubs his thumb over the promise ring I still wear on my right hand, letting out a deep sigh and clearing his throat.

“How long…
” he tries. “How long have you and him…?”

“
Eight and a half months,” I say softly, meeting his eyes as he nods his understanding before gesturing towards the engagement ring Chase had given me.

“And this?”

“Only a week,” I admit, watching as he releases a deep breath.

“And
you… you’re in love with him?”

Unable to speak through the lump in my throat caused by
hearing his pain, I simply nod, wiping my tears with the back of my hand. The silence surrounds us for several minutes before I finally find my voice again.

“Jack?” I whisper
as I squeeze his hand, pulling his watery eyes back to mine. “I don’t want you to think that I… Jack, I didn’t go out looking for someone else, it just…”

“Sophie,” he interrupts my rambling
, shaking his head. “I never would have thought that…”

“I would have waited forever, Jack,” I manage through my tears and cracking voice. “I didn’t know or I never would have left Camden. I never would have stopped waiting for you, Jack.
Never
.”

“
Shh,” he whispers, pulling me into his embrace, kissing the side of my head. “I know, Baby. I know.”

“I loved you so much,” I sniff into his shoulder, pulling away to face him as he brushes the tears away from my cheeks for the tenth time. “I
love
you so much, Jack. I don’t want you to ever think losing you wasn’t the hardest thing that I’ve ever gone through.”

“I’m so sorry,
Soph,” he whispers. “God, if I could take it back, I would.”

“I know
.”

Raising my
right hand to his lips, he kisses the ring he’d given me there before returning our still linked hands to my lap.

“You need to rest,” he says as he pushes the hair away from my face. “You look exhausted.”

Standing, he keeps his hands out in front of him to help me up.

“That’s just a nice way of telling someone they look old
and crappy,” I sniff.

“No,” he chuckles, keeping his grip on my hand as he leads us back to the
house as he looks down at me with my favorite lopsided grin before growing serious. “You look gorgeous, Sophie. You’re still the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.”

“Thanks,” I say softly as I feel the blush heat my cheeks.

He’s about to respond when a flash of headlights shine across the front yard, distracting us both. Turning to see who’s pulling into the now darkened driveway, I recognize Matt’s Chevelle and remember he’d taken JT to his parents for a while.

Immediately, rage consumes me.

As though she senses it, the light from the living room spills out onto the porch and Lucy pulls the door open.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt y’all,” she says apologetically. “I just need to get JT in.”

“Aunt Sophie!” JT calls out as he runs across the yard towards me.

“Hey Sweet Pea,” I say with the biggest smile I can manage as I bend down to hug him. I’m always happy to see him, but right now, I’m an emotional wreck
and intend on having a word with Matt.

“Come on, Monkey,” Lucy says to JT when I pull away slightly from him.

“Can I stay out here with my Aunt Sophie?” he whines to Lucy. When I see Matt getting out of his car, I answer for her.

“No, Baby,” I say kissing his face. “Listen to your mama, okay? Go and get washed up.”

“But I really want to stay with you!”

“I’ll be inside in a little while
,” I say standing and passing him off to Lucy, meeting her eyes and speaking quietly. “Luce, please take him inside.”

“Okay,” she says quietly, seeming to understand
my need for privacy for a few more minutes.

Matt is nearly to us when the door opens again a minute later.

“Sophie?” I hear Chase’s booming voice and turn to face him, watching his eyes take in mine and Jack’s still linked hands. “You okay?”

“Yes,” I nod, still not sure if it’s a lie or not. “Where is JT?”

“Lucy just came in and rushed him towards the back of the house,” he answers as he pulls the door shut behind him. “Is that Matt?”

“Yep,” I ground out, releasing Jack’s hand and spinning on my heels to find Matt at the edge of the steps I’m already making my way down.

“Hey,” he says. His smile is a nervous one, no doubt trying to evaluate the situation. Before he can speak again though, I cut him off.

“Did you know?”

“What?”
he asks, obviously surprised by my immediate attack.

“
Don’t play stupid with me, Matt,” I ground out, coming to a stop in front of him. “Did. You. Know?”

“It’s complicated,
Soph,” he starts, immediately fueling my fury.

“No
, it’s not, Matt,” I ground out. “Either you knew or you didn’t. Which one is it?”

“It’s not that easy, Sophie!” he says defensively. “Did I
see the explosion? Yes. Did I specifically see him blow up? Obviously not, Babe! They told me…”

Before he has the chance to finish, I slap him
hard across the face.

“You liar!”
I shout at him, startling everyone.

“
Soph,” he tries, moving to touch my arm and cringing when I angrily push it away from me.

“Shut up!” I yell back at him, pushing him away with force before stalking towards him furiously.

“Sophie, please listen…”

“No, Matt!”
I shout, smacking him as hard as I can in the chest before pointing in Jack’s direction. “You watched me cry for him for nearly
two years
and you never said a word! You had a million chances to talk to me, to tell me he may have been alive and you never said a fucking word to me! You don’t get to talk to me now!”

“Sophie-”

“You’re a liar! You told me he was
dead
, Matt! You stood right here in this fucking house and told me and Ana that Jack was dead!”

“I thought…”

“You watched me cry over an empty grave and you never said a fucking word!”

“
Soph, he didn’t know,” Jack tries to defend him.

“Exactly!”
I say through my angry tears, never moving my glare from Matt. “You didn’t know what the hell you were talking about and you lied to me, Matt! You lied to everyone! You said you
saw
him!”

“
I told you I saw the explosion, Sophie!” he tries. “It was so massive! There was smoke everywhere! I thought for sure he was gone! Maybe you’re confused about…”

“Don’t you
dare!” I scream through my tears, lunging at him.

“Baby,”
Chase says, grabbing me at the waist, stopping me from hitting him again.

“I have relived that conversation every
fucking day!” I scream at him. “‘I’m so sorry, Soph. I tried, but by the time I got to him, it was too late. He was already gone, Baby. I’m so sorry, Sophie. I just couldn’t get him home to you this time.’”

His silence tells me he remembers that day just as well as I do. I can feel a fresh wave of exhaustion sweep over me as all three of them keep their eyes glued on me, all speechless.

“Now do you remember? Because I do. Those words never fucking stop Matt. I’ve heard them over and over and over again,” I manage in a low voice, no longer bothering with wiping my tears away. “I know what you told me, Matt and it was a lie because you didn’t see Jack.”

“Sophie, I’m so sorry,” Matt says, his eyes welling up. “I thought he was gone,
too, Baby. I never would have been able to leave if I thought there was a chance… I never would have said…”

“You said you
saw
, Matt,” I accuse. “You let me think… Matt, you told his
sister
…”

Thinking of everythi
ng we went through, every tear we shed… My words to Chase earlier couldn’t have been more fitting as I feel my body, my heart, my entire soul weaken.

It’s too much.

Unable to stand any longer, I slowly sink to my knees and drop my gaze.

I don’t think I’ll ever stop crying.

Matt crouches in front of me and tries for a final time to explain. Pushing my hair away from my face, he tilts me head up slightly so I face him.

“
Soph,” he starts, but with the last of my energy, I slowly shake my head.

“I don’t
want to hear another word.”

“I’m so sorry, Sophie,” he pleads. “You have to believe me…”

“I don’t,” I cut him off, my voice numb as I continue shaking my head defiantly. “I don’t know how I’ll ever believe another word out of your mouth, Matt.”

“Sophie,” he sighs. “Babe, it was a mistake. I didn’t know.”

“Then you shouldn’t have said you saw him,” I whisper, tears steadily streaming down my cheeks. “Saying that? Letting us go through all of this when you didn’t know deep down into your soul that he was gone? That was the ultimate betrayal, Matt. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to forgive you for this.”

“Please don’t say that,” he whispers again, his voice cracking.

“Maybe you should go, man,” Jack says quietly, pulling him away from me and turning him to walk back towards his car with him and promising to call. “Give her some time.”

Nodding back at him, Jack offers him into a brotherly embrace. Chase bends down in front of me, pulling me into his arm
s and holding me there tightly. He lifts me into his arms and makes his way over to the chair on the porch, keeping me straddling his lap as I sob into his chest.

“I’ll be right in here if you need me,
Soph,” I hear Jack say softly as he makes his way back to the door, stopping to touch my arm reassuringly.

It’s when the door closes that I feel the last bit of strength I have leave me. The last thing I remember before falling asleep in
Chase’s arms hours later is his deep voice in my hair.

“
It’s okay, Baby. I’ve got you. I’m right here.”

Ana

After all the commotion of the day we’d just experienced, we all decided staying in Camden another night was
for the best.

Since Lucy and JT were staying in our childhood home now, Jack would be coming back to Corpus with Drake and me for a while. Everything is still so new
and things were so different from when he left, he’s not had time to think about his next step.

While he’d admitted that he understood Sophie moving on and he was glad she was happy, I could tell it was killing him to see her with Chase.

Honestly, it will be weird for me now, too. Chase is a great guy and I know he loves Sophie. Now that I know Jack is alive though, her being with anyone else just doesn’t feel right. At the same time, I can’t imagine her
not
being with Chase. Knowing how much she loves them both, I can’t imagine what she’s feeling right now.

One look at her and it’s clear that So
phie is an absolute mess.

Afte
r Matt leaves, I don’t see her again until Chase carries her into the house at one in the morning. When they come in, Jack and I are still up, sitting at the table and talking.

G
ently, Chase lays her on the couch, removes her boots before pulling his jacket off and placing it over her small frame. After making sure she’s settled enough, he lets out a deep breath and turns to face us.

“How is she
?” I ask.

“I don’t know,” he shakes his head, answering honestly. “She’s exhausted, I know that much. I’m going to talk to Drake and see about taking a few more
days off. I hope it’s cool for us to crash here? I know it’s a little awkward,” he admits as he looks between Jack and me. “I just don’t want to wake her up.”