The Second Virginity of Suzy Green (3 page)

“No he’s not,” I
say hotly. “He’s confident. Well who wouldn’t be looking like that? And he’s in
the football team.”

“Hmm. He doesn’t
sound like your usual type.”

“I don’t know
what you mean.” Actually I do but that’s beside the point.

“A blond,
blue-eyed, sporty, alleged virgin—’

“What do you
mean alleged?”

“Well, guys like
that just belong to these clubs for their image.”

“How do you work
that out exactly?”

“Simple. What
better way to get a girl if she thinks he doesn’t want them just for sex.”

“Maddie not all
guys spend their time wondering if they’ll get to third base you know.”

“Hmmm. If you
say so.”

“Well, I do. And
for the record he definitely is my type.” As from now.

“Come on Suzy.
This is me you’re talking to. If you’d have said, cute, laid back, with a
cheeky grin then that would be different. You’ve never gone for the obvious.
Because of their obvious deficiencies.”

Yes, and where
has not going for the obvious got me? Precisely nowhere. Maddie and I are not
exactly top of the in-crowd’s party list. We might spend our time drooling over
various guys but that’s about it, being asked us out happens rarely.

“Anyway, it
doesn’t matter because he’s hardly going to notice me. Not with the likes of
Lori around. And for all I know he’s already seeing someone.” I was going to
ask Lori about that then changed my mind at the last minute in case she told
him.

“Here we go
again. Putting yourself down. Why wouldn’t he notice you?”

“You want a
list?”

“Yeah. And don’t
come out with the usual crap about your hair.”

“Hair is
important,” I moan.

“But not the be
all and end all. Come on, why else won’t he notice you, hmm?”

“It’s no use
talking to you. You’re deliberately being difficult.” I hold the phone against
my ear with my shoulder, fold my arms and stick out my bottom lip.

“Stop sulking.
Just because I’m not in your room doesn’t mean I don’t know what you’re doing.”
I swear she’s got the gift, even if she does deny it. “So, tell me more about
this elite school.”

“You’d just die
if you could see the uniform,” I say, my tense muscles relaxing and brief
tantrum forgotten. “And they all conform. Not a non-regulation item to be found
on any of them. It’s like being a Stepford Student. And don’t get me started on
the shoes. I’ve already got through a packet of blister plasters.”

“And your tongue
stud?” Did she have to remind me of that? Losing it caused me a great deal of
angst.

“What do you
think? I had to say goodbye to it. After all that time keeping it a secret. And
now, in the space of a few of hours, you’d never even know it had been there.
The hole’s totally closed up.”

“Is there
anything good about the place, not counting guy-Guy?”

Good question.
Apart from the obvious, as in if I play my cards right I’ll be heading for the
right college with the right people, doing the right course and being a
daughter any parent would be proud of. I can’t let them down again. I just
can’t.

“Sure. The guys
in my classes seem okay.” I pause for a moment. My mind’s gone a total blank.
“Anyway, it’s too early to decide. I’ll tell you one thing, though. For a top
school the work isn’t that hard. I couldn’t believe it, I thought I’d have
loads of catching up to do. But not so far.”

“You watch it.
If you’re not careful you’ll be the class nerd.”

“Yeah, right. In
your dreams.” Or should I say mine?

“Why didn’t you
tell us you’ve been put in the top class for math and English?” Mom asks out of
the blue, while we’re sitting down eating dinner and I’m contemplating whether
to put mayo or ketchup on my fries.

“Sorry, I forgot.”
I say shrugging. I decide on mayo and reach for the jar in the middle of the
table.

“Oh, Suzy. How
can you forget? It’s great news. We’re really thrilled, aren’t we dear?” She
smiles at Dad who nods his head in agreement.

“It’s no big
deal.”

Which is just
not true. I was totally freaked when they told me. I know I’ve been working
hard and doing my homework, but I didn’t realize I was doing so well. Unless
they’ve made a mistake—which is always a possibility. Then they’ll put me back
in the other class, and I’ll look a right idiot. I don’t know why Mom’s so excited
about it. It’s not like I’m in Rosie’s league or anything. Hang on a minute—

“How do you
know, anyway?” I stop unscrewing the lid, put the jar down and stare at her.

“Because I
phoned the school to see how you’re doing.”

What? Oh no. How
could she? I lean forward and rest my head on my hand. This is so embarrassing.

“But why, Mom?
Why?”

“I think that’s
obvious, Suzy.” She raises her left eyebrow, a remarkable feat in itself, but I
know it means it’s lecture time. It used to be a longstanding joke between
Rosie and me. “How else am I meant to find out? Every time I ask you how school’s
going you just say ‘good’. I know you’re working harder than before. I can see
that for myself. But I want to make sure everything really is okay. So I phoned
and spoke to the Principal.”

Spying on me
more like. I shake my head in disbelief. This so isn’t happening. I mean, I’m
not a baby. How many seventeen-year-olds are there who have a mother phoning
their school? All I can hope for is no-one gets to hear about it.

“Well, please
don’t phone again. I promise next time I’ll tell you when anything happens.”
When it’s something I don’t mind her knowing.

I’m not sure
whether I’ll mention going to the VC meeting tomorrow night. She might start
asking awkward questions. I wanted to go to the meeting two weeks ago, but
couldn’t because it was Dad’s birthday and it’s always been tradition on
birthdays for us all to go to the movies, birthday person chooses the movie, and
then out for a pizza. I’ll admit there were times in the past when I tried to
get out of it, unsuccessfully I might add, but I wouldn’t try that now.
Especially as it was his first birthday since Rosie died.

“We only want
the best for you, love. Sending you to this school seems to be turning out
really well.” She reaches over and touches me gently on the arm. Now I feel
guilty big time. I’m all they have, so of course they want me to do well. And I
won’t disappoint. Not like in the past.

***

I tear into
Starbucks, praying they haven’t left already. What is it with me? With the best
intentions in the world, I’m always late. There’s inevitably something
conspiring against me—nine times out of ten it’s my hair. Maddie always used to
tell me to meet her half an hour earlier than I needed to. And she thought I
didn’t know.

And tonight was
a double whammy. Not only did I have my hair to contend with but finding
something to wear was a challenge of the highest order. I mean, what does one
wear to a virginity club? Clearly not ripped black jeans with studs and a
Nirvana t-shirt. My eyes are drawn to the dark brown pants and green shirt I’m
wearing. As my mother said when I left: ‘very neat and tidy, dear.’ Neat and
tidy!

I drag my
thoughts back to tonight. If Lori and Rachel have already gone then I’m going
back home. No way am I going on my own. Absolutely not. I scan the place and
see them sitting at a table by the window. Phew.

They don’t look
happy, though. I bet they’ve been talking about me being late, probably
regretting asking me to come tonight. Even though Lori doesn’t have to mentor
me any more they’re still sort of including me in things they do. By that I
mean if they see me in the cafeteria they ask me to join them. And I was asked
over to Jana’s house last week after school. Of course, it does help that Lori
and I now have all our classes together because of the AP classes I’m in. And
she often sits next to me. So, I guess I’m on the fringes of the in crowd.

Lori catches
sight of me and waves. I start to walk toward them but before I manage even a
couple of steps they get up and head in my direction.

“So sorry,” I
say once they’re in earshot. “I had a hell of a time with my hair.” At least
they haven’t heard that excuse thousands of times before, so hopefully they’ll
be more understanding than my old friends. Not that it’s a lie. It took me ages
to straighten it, which wasn’t helped by me forgetting to switch the
straightener on once I’d plugged it in.

“It looks cool,”
Rachel says. “I wish I had hair like yours. It’s so thick and bouncy. And you
can do so much with it. Mine,” she curls her bottom lip as she slides her fingers
through her awesome blond, to die for, hair, “is so fine I can’t do anything
other than this.”

Sure. And if I’d
been drinking the caramel frappuccino I’ve been looking forward to all afternoon
and which I’m clearly going to have to forgo, I’d have choked on it. I’m
learning fast that Rachel is full of self deprecating crap which she indulges
in just to get other people to contradict her. I mean, really. This girl is
tall, slim with cleavage, and a face that wouldn’t look out of place on the
front of Cosmo.

“Come on,” Lori
says impatiently, rolling her eyes toward the ceiling. “We’re meant to be
meeting the others in five minutes and we’ve got a ten minute walk.” Ouch. She
turns on her heel and heads toward the door. Rachel and I follow.

“So, tell me
again what’s going to happen,” I say while we’re striding down Main Street. “I don’t have to go up on a stage or anything do I?”

This is really
scary. What if they ask me to take the pledge and I say yes and somehow they
know I’m lying and then everyone hates me? Or what if I take the pledge (not
that I’ve decided yet) and the words come out all wrong? Or what if I laugh?

I’m always
laughing when I shouldn’t. I get told off and a smirk magically appears on my
face. Then I get told off even more. I think it’s genetic. Because I surely
can’t help it.

Although, I haven’t been told off once
since starting this new school. And I have to say it feels pretty good not to
have all eyes on me when something wrong has been done.

Not that I blame
my old teachers. Maddie and I did have a penchant for practical jokes. You tell
me anyone who can resist gluing the teacher’s chair when there’s a glue stick
on the table and the room is empty. Well, anyone who, like Maddie and I, tends
to get themselves in a spot of trouble from time to time. Okay. Maybe that’s a
tad under-played. I have to admit we got into a lot of trouble a lot of the
time. But—yes there’s always a but—the things we did were relatively harmless.
Well, they were until my last episode—but I blame that on all the stress I was
under. And I truly learnt my lesson, that’s for sure.

“You’ll be
fine,” says Lori. “At the beginning of the meeting Jamie will welcome everyone
and ask the new people to put up their hands. Then if there are any new people,
which there are.” She smiles at me. “He’ll talk a bit about what our philosophy
is and ask you if you’re ready to take the pledge. Then you do. Voila. See, no
problem.”

“And if I take
the pledge do I have to stand up and put my hand on the bible or something.
Like in court.”

“That’s up to
you. Did you bring a bible with you?”

“No. Was I meant
to? You didn’t mention it. Or if you did I’ve forgotten. Maybe someone will
lend me one. Or—”

Lori starts to
giggle. “Suzy. I’m joking. Of course you don’t have to. ‘Wait for Love’ isn’t a
religious group. It’s all about wanting to save ourselves for that special
someone.”

“That’s cool.”

Did I just say
that? And did I sound convincing? What’s weird is no-one has actually asked me
if I’m a virgin. They just assume it. I wonder why? Maybe I give off a virginal
air.

“Hey, over
there,” says Rachel looking over her shoulder and bringing me back from my
thoughts. “Guy and Jana.”

My head spins around
in double quick time and I see them walking toward us. I reach up and slide my
hand down my hair in case it’s sticking up as it’s a bit windy. Guy’s been
really nice to me since that first morning. We get on so well. Though I’ve
missed him this last week because he’s been at on some football camp.

“Hi guys,” he
says when he catches us up. I swear his gaze lingers a few seconds longer on me
than on Lori and Rachel. Or is that wishful thinking? Maddie always says I have
a vivid imagination.

“Hi,” we all say
in Unison.

“Glad you decided
to come,” he says to me.

Me too. Me too.
Me too. This is going to be the best evening ever. But I don’t want him to
think I’m keen. Guys like him are used to girls running after them. I’m going
to play it real cool. Let him think I’m not bothered whether he’s there or not.

“Thanks.” I turn
away and follow Lori toward the entrance to the Bedford Center where the
meeting is being held.