The Scorpion's Sweet Venom (13 page)

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Authors: Bruna Surfistinha

BOOK: The Scorpion's Sweet Venom
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So someone likes transvestites. Fine . . . it's nobody else's business . . . but why marry a woman??? If they like transvestites,
fine, but for Christ's sake, marry one. It's simple . . . I've heard so many stories of men who've married transvestites and
don't feel ashamed or guilty about it. Now these guys are real men! Because they own up to what they like . . .

Another car stopped with two young guys in it . . . They didn't let me down and realised I was a woman. I asked if they liked
transvestites and they said in unison, 'No way, we like women.' There was one who stopped and asked right off if I was a transvestite.
I said yes. He stared at my crotch and said, 'C'mon, it doesn't look like you've got a dick in there.' So I said, 'That's
because it's limp.' But I couldn't contain myself and started to laugh, and he realised I was playing with him. There was
also one who looked like a nutcase who said, 'How much for a quick blow job?'

To put the guys off picking me up, I hitched the price up. When the car wasn't all that hot, I told them my price was 100
reais,
because I knew it would be too expensive. And when the car was better, I said it was 300, because even guys who looked like
they had money knew this was a lot to charge in that area.

No one complained about my price, they just said they didn't have that kind of money on them, while some tried to haggle.
One said, 'You're really worth it, but I've only got 40
reais
in my wallet. Can't you do something for 40?' I laughed . . . and said no . . . because really, I wouldn't charge that even
for a quick wank.

I really was charging a lot for someone who solicits on street corners, seeing as the people who do this charge 50
reals
at the most. One guy said that no one he'd picked up on the street had ever charged him more than 40.

I had a bit of a laugh at an older guy's expense, but he didn't even notice. He stopped, thinking I was a transvestite, but
when he got close, he looked me up and down and realised I wasn't. Even so, we chatted a while and I asked if he picked up
transvestites very often. He said he did. I asked why he liked them and he replied that being with a transvestite satisfied
his desire to be with a man and a woman at the same time. I asked if his arsehole was nice and stretched and he answered,
very seriously (thinking I was being serious too), that he thought so, because it didn't hurt any more when he was getting
buggered.

~

I once had a real smut session with two guys. One of them had already been my client. While I gave one ablow job, the other
just watched us and wanked himself off. The one I was sucking off came in my mouth. Then I got to work on the other one and
made him come like that too. I lay down and the two of them sucked on my nipples at the same time. Very nice. Meanwhile, I
felt one of them masturbating me. I only didn't come because he doesn't know how to masturbate a woman. But I appreciated
his intention . . .

I got on all fours, and while one gave it to me, I blew the other. At the same time. The one I was blowing came first, but
the other one took a little longer. Being with two men really turned me on . . .

~

One night, at a swingers' club, I got with a sexy brunette. She was having sex with her partner and I sat next to her to touch
her. I couldn't resist and started sucking her nipples, which were delicious. We kissed a lot, but it didn't go any further
than that. I was dying to go down on her, but I didn't manage to pluck up the courage. We swapped partners and it was great.
I enjoyed her partner and he gave it to me the way I like it. Unfortunately, he came quickly.

As we were leaving, I saw a really sexy blonde at a table, accompanied by an old man who could have been her grandfather,
I swear. She grabbed me, but I noticed she was drunk. I stood in front ofher and she slipped one of my breasts out and started
sucking it. While she licked my nipple, she stared at me without blinking. Really nice stuff. But my client wanted to leave.

~

I answer the phone and the guy asks me straight up, 'Do you give brown showers?' Well, I'd given golden showers on several
occasions, but I'd never given anyone a brown shower. I'll explain both. Golden showers are when the client asks you to pee
on them, while he wanks off. Generally they prefer to have their shower after they've had a bit of sex so they can reach climax
with their 'special request'. Of course, it's not easy. First, you have to drink a lot of beer and stay focused. You can't
have sex with a bursting bladder - no woman is capable of that. . . You have to drink just the right amount so you can turn
on the waterworks at your 'master's' command.

It's easier with shit. I did it once, and it was my first and last time. When the client asked me over the phone, I said I
did it. More out of curiosity than desire. After all, how can we say we don't like something if we haven't tried it? So I
did. I admit the situation made me a little nervous. The guy wanted to wank himself off while I did a 'number two' on him.
He arrived, and there was a little foreplay, with him fingering my arsehole and play- ing with my bum. He didn't even want
to fuck. We played around like this until I said I needed to go. Then he lay on his back, wanking frenetically, his eyes glued
to my rear end, while I squatted over him, facing away. And I did it . . . Isn't that what he'd asked for?

~

I was about to jump on my client when we lay down, but he wanted to chat a bit beforehand because he liked the game of seduction,
even with pros. Fine. We talked until he asked me if I kissed. I told him I didn't kiss all clients, just the ones I wanted
to. Then I kissed him. He placed me face down on the bed and started licking and nibbling my back and bum. Then he turned
me over and went down on me. Right after I'd come in his mouth, he kissed me and I could taste my juices . . . then he went
down again, sucking my nipples, and kept going . . . tummy, pussy, legs and feet. On the way back up he went down on me until
I came again. And gave me another kiss.

We put a condom on his dick, which was hard and throbbing, although I hadn't even touched him . . . He got me in the missionary
position, but he started to go limp with the condom on. He told me he was used to having sex with his wife without a condom
and when he had to put one on, he lost his hard-on. Normal. I wasn't fazed.

He asked me to do a sixty-nine with him so he'd get hard again. We did it for a while, but he couldn't get his hard-on back
with his dick in a 'straightjacket'.

He wanted some time out to 'rest', so he went down on me again and I came for the third time. He came back to life and we
put another condom on him, but he lost it again in no time . . . There was nothing we could do and our session ended for two
reasons: one, because his time was up and two, because we couldn't have sex . . . Summing up: we didn't have sex, I came three
times and made money doing it . . . aye aye . . . Even so, he said he'd be back.

~

One day I had a guy from London. He was really insecure and affectionate. There was a nice chemistry between us - and if I'd
understood better what he was saying, we would have got along well, I'm sure. But the fun part was getting to see the Hotel
Unique, where he was staying. Very chic! His room was really nice and had a plasma TV. We tried to talk a little in English,
but then he started speaking Portunhol - a mix of Spanish and Portuguese. I had to keep asking him to repeat himself, because
he spoke fast and I couldn't understand a thing. I thought he'd be aloof, like other foreigners. But he wasn't. On the contrary
. . . He was even con- cerned that I had an orgasm. He went down on me for ages. I realised he wasn't going to stop until
I got there. Pelvic-floor muscles, here we go! I asked him to lie on his stomach and started licking his back. The Englishman
came to life and, surprise surprise, flopped over on to his back, offering me his arse, which I didn't refuse. I rimmed him
until he was on fire. I took turns between his arse and his dick until he came.

~

Today I learnt two new positions: in the first one, the client made me lie on my back, with my legs up in the air as if I
was about to roll backwards. Like a baby whose mother is going to dust his bottom with talcum powder. And while I did this
he gave it to me in a squatting position. This was the one I liked best. I'd actually heard of the other, but I'd never tried
it. It's called the scissor position. Both partners hold their legs apart, like two pairs of scissors joined at the groin.
It's interesting, because you can use your partner's legs for support, pulling back on them. I recommend it.

~

Yes, I have had sex with famous people. It's funny how people think the famous don't have the urge . . . Relax - I'm not one
to name names, nor will I ever be. Professional ethics. I'm a prostitute, not a blackmailer. When one guy arrived, I thought:
Iknow this guy from somewhere. But the feeling went away. After all, we were there for something else. I didn't worry about
trying to find out where I knew him from. But I realised he was a bit peeved that I hadn't said anything. Right in the middle
of it, he trotted out, 'Your doorman asked me for an autograph.' Poor thing, he must have felt frustrated. I didn't say anything
and kept sucking him off. I've never been impressed by fame, and wasn't about to start now. If he was expecting a shower of
attention, a request for an autograph, or whatever, he didn't get it. And I don't believe in freebies for VIPS. After all,
I was the star of that situation . . .

Another famous person was a TV presenter. It was easy-going, couple sex that later got smutty. I knew (and he knew I knew)
who he was, of course. Introductions weren't necessary.

~

A real girlie party. Just me and three other women, without any men around. They've all got plump pussies the way I like them.
While we all gently take each other's clothes off, an array of exciting lingerie appears, along with implants and natural
breasts -all different, but just as sexy. Small nipples, pointy nipples, but no 'pancakes' - just succulent breasts, which
you can feel, stroke, suck.

We form a daisy chain, each one nuzzling her mouth into the next one's pussy, until the circle isclosed and no one is left
out, giving and receiving affection and pleasure at the same time. We take turns. Each one has a different smell and flavour.
At one stage, I become the centre of attention. There are three women serving me: one licks my breasts, another goes down
on me and the third one positions herself over my face and offers me the best of herself, so I can lick her, suck her and
make her come.

The sequence of orgasms is incredible. Moans become the musical backdrop for this women's party. There are no fake dicks,
dildos. Just a feminine touch, delicate mouths, expert tongues, the rubbing of skin, breasts, cunts. And we have wave after
wave of orgasms until we're exhausted, but satisfied. Then we rest in each other's arms until we've caught our breath and
start all over again.

Well, this is my sexual fantasy. Unfortunately, it has never happened, except in my imagination. One day it's going to be
a memory that'll make me wet just thinking about it.

There's another fantasy I hope to fulfil one day -to have sex with a military policeman. But he has to be from here in Sao
Paulo. That uniform of theirs drives me crazy. The cut makes any man look sexy. Hasn't anyone noticed? It makes their bums
look high and tight, and the bulge between their legs is concentrated in such a way that you can see they'resporting a lethal
weapon. Their shirts and jerseys give them a very sensual shape, and they wear black boots with large buckles. MMM.

The sex would be wild, with him dressed (of course!) and me running my hands over his entire body, as if I'd just been given
a new doll to play with, so later he'd grab me forcefully, but not violently, and do whatever he wanted with me. Him doing
me up against a wall with my legs wrapped around his waist. Just the thought of a military cop dropping his trousers to fuck
me, wow . . . I'd confess things I'd never done. If all this happened in public, in a cinema, for example, it would be paradise.
Having sex in public, or knowing someone's watching me, I'd be halfway towards a historical orgasm. Indulging two fantasies
at once would be divine. Well, now I've confessed my most secret desires, maybe they'll come true? Any takers?

I
always wonder why so many men come looking for prostitutes. I've noticed that couples don't talk much these days, especially
about sex. They don't tell each other what they like (and what they don't like), their fantasies. But you can't force someone
to do something they don't want to: it takes two to have sex. Some hard-core fantasies scare wives (or can even put an end
to marriages). That's why they come to us . . . Yes, women are good wives and mothers, companions, confidantes and friends.
But in bed they should try to loosen up and have a good fuck. It'll do them good, I promise.

I hope sharing my experience will make it a little easier for people. Here are just a few tips, simple things to spice up
this game for two (or three, or four . . .).

UNPLANNED SEX

There's nothing weirder than scheduled sex . . . Of course I schedule in my clients. But with a realpartner, the best part
is the element of surprise. Try to catch them off guard, forgetting about time and place (as long as it's not in public):
in the bathroom, kitchen, on the stairs of your building. Prohibited places where you feel you might get caught give you a
rush of adrenalin that sensualises everything.

THE GAME OF SEDUCTION

To spice up a relationship, forget 'every Saturday night', OK? But there are other basic tricks, like the woman putting on
some really sexy lingerie (sometimes just a suspender belt is enough to 'suspend' her partner's breath), a costume (nurse,
plumber, flight attendant . . .). A two-way striptease (taking turns removing an item of clothing) can help people with their
fear of looking ridiculous (and since when has seducing someone been ridiculous?).

TOYS

A visit to a sex shop will open the door to a world of possibilities, I promise. No, they don't just sell rubber dicks. Although
that can be an interesting place to start. Fly higher: use handcuffs, blindfold each other, play with smells and sensations,
your sense of touch. These shops carry all kinds ofstimulating gels, which can really get things sizzling. A good reason to
give each other a mutual massage - the sort that relaxes and lights your fire at the same time. A good porn film on DVD can
heat things up. But don't forget - all this is to make foreplay pleasurable and get both of you in the mood for a hot fuck.
But it won't work if it's only two minutes then 'down to business'.

INTENSITY

Some people think sex should be like in porn films: the guy wildly banging the girl as if he were drilling through asphalt.
You might actually get to this point, but not straight off. The fun part is varying the intensity. One day, it might be gentle.
The next day, wilder. Or both on the same day. But unvarying sex, always following the same script, becomes routine.

ORAL FOR MEN

Something that should never be left out for either partner. It's different and stimulating. It's what I most like in bed (whether
giving - which, all modesty aside, I do very well - or receiving it). Some clients joke with me, saying I should give other
women lessons on how to do it. Well, here's part ofthe secret: play a lot with your tongue around the head of the penis, and
every now and then put a little pressure on it with your mouth. Don't just masturbate the guy with your hand. The exciting
part of oral sex is precisely making the most of the possibilities: lips, tongue, teeth (very lightly), suction (which is
exactly what the vagina does), the space in your mouth. Good oral sex is when the woman doesn't use her hands and does all
the work with her mouth.

I always start by sucking their balls, which is a very sensitive, pleasurable area for men. I alternate between licking and
sucking gently (remember, the balls are very sensitive, so don't try anything that might hurt), while I slowly make my way
up to the penis. While I perform oral sex, I imagine my mouth is a vagina swallowing the penis. I do this on purpose. They
cotton on and imagine they're ramming it into a vagina, but at the same time they know they're going to come in a woman's
mouth. Oral sex has to be wet, with the tongue playing a lot around the penis, like a child eagerly sucking a lollipop. When
he comes, don't be disgusted - keep sucking to the last drop.

The intensity of oral sex varies from man to man (and you need to find out what his rhythm is). Some like slow, careful movements.
Others like it fast. How do you know how he likes it? Easy: try bothways and see which one makes him moan more intensely with
pleasure, when he starts to writhe.

ORAL FOR WOMAN

Oral on women is a little more complicated (pay attention, guys). I'd say 80 per cent of my clients have performed oral sex
on me. Of these, only 10 per cent know what they are doing. Of course, good oral sex for one woman is bad for another, since
each woman feels pleasure in a different way and place. But knowing this is already a great step forward. Some feel pleasure
in the clitoris, others in the labia, while yet others feel it in the vaginal canal. So, guys, the best thing is trial and
error: explore each of these regions and pay attention to her reaction. You'll know when you're on the right track . . .

The intensity also varies from person to person. Some women prefer light licks. Others like it to be harder, with a few little
nibbles (or not - she's the one who will say how hard she likes it). I prefer the tongue on my clitoris, with fast, strong
licking movements. And no soft tongues! The tongue should be like my finger when I masturbate. In my blog, I always joke that
there are three kinds of lickers. And, of course, I have my preferences. Want to know how I classify them? The first is what
I call'the dog with a slab of meat in his mouth'. These are the guys who stick their faces in your cunt and shake their heads
back and forth. A lot of the time you can't even feel their tongue, just their nose. A word of advice for these guys: in my
case, at least, it doesn't turn me on even remotely. . . I get tense and worry that I'm going to get bitten or hurt. The second
type is what I call 'the ice-lolly'. They're like kids sucking an ice-lolly, licking up and down without stopping anywhere.
It can be a turn-on, but you need a good deal of concentration and 'inner effort' to reach orgasm this way. The third is the
sort that licks like a woman. Guys, don't lose heart: women really do know what other women want. It's hard to explain. They
know how to find the right spot with their tongues, with the right intensity, and their fingers go precisely to that unexplored
region known as the G-spot. So, guys, if you really want to give a woman good oral sex, don't be too shy to ask how. We'll
tell you everything . . .

Now the best position, of course, is the sixty-nine: you can give and receive oral pleasure at the same time. It can be with
her on top, with him on top (careful: in this position, some guys think they can pump away to their heart's content . . .),
or both lying on their sides.

ANAL SEX

A lot of women email me asking how to go about having anal sex. They say they really want to but are (unanimously) afraid
of feeling pain, or they say they've tried but haven't managed to go all the way. My advice: ask your partner to lie on his
back and you get on top. This way you will be able to control the penetration, movement and rhythm - as much or as little
as you can take. A lubricant gel can help with the penetration.

For men, my advice is different: be patient. Let the woman take the lead and choose the position she is used to (or let her
discover what she likes if she's never done it before). For those who are already adept, the best position really is on all
fours, because it's more pleasurable for the woman. Beginners should not try this. It's dangerous for a man to ram it in all
at once, as I've had happen to me. It wasn't nice . . .

Another question about anal sex that crops up time and again is hygiene. It's not very nice to see a mess on the condom afterwards.
This kind of accident can be avoided. The only way to eliminate the risk is by using a vaginal douche, which you can buy at
a chemist. It is a rubber device in the shape of a pear, with a plastic tube that you fit to the top. All you do is fill the
rubber base with water and slidethe tube into the anus. You squeeze the rubber part until all the water is inside you. Then
you let the water come out by itself, removing anything that's inside. It doesn't hurt and allows you to have clean anal sex.

But if, after all that, something still comes out, no matter how embarrassing it is (and it is, I promise), the guy has to
understand that this hole was actually made for something else . . . With this lavage, there is almost no risk.

A tip for the boys: please don't try to go straight to the main course. Women need to be in the mood for anal sex. So concentrate
first on her pleasure (so yours will be just as good). Lots of caressing, oral sex, get her to relax . . . Then you'll both
come, a lot. If only one of you comes, the sex wasn't complete.

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