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Authors: Iris Murdoch

BOOK: The Sandcastle
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New Yorker
showing some very fantastic-looking
cars. A photo of the St Bride’s second cricket eleven. That was new. Donald had
only just made the second eleven. On the mantelpiece stood a photograph of the
parents, with the glass cracked. Beside it was an enormous pocket-knife with
several of its blades open, and a half-eaten doughnut.
‘Can I eat the rest of this?’ said Felicity Permission was given. After all,
there didn’t seem to be much that was new.
‘Have you anything else to eat?’ said Felicity. ‘I’m starving after that trek.’
Donald removed himself lazily from the table and began to dig in a black tin
box which stood in the corner. Jimmy Carde got up, stretched, jumped on the
table and squatted there, bumping up and down on his heels and drumming on the
table top, in the rhythm of a recent dance tune. Felicity wished that he would
go away.
‘Here’s a cake,’ said Donald. ‘We’re not very flush at the moment.’
‘That’s an ancient British cake,’ said Carde. ‘It was part of Boadicea’s
rations for her troops.’
Felicity tried it. It tasted rather like that. She ate it all the same.
‘How are the parents?’ asked Donald.
‘Mummy’s in a fuss about going away,’ said Felicity, her mouth full. ‘I haven’t
seen much of Daddy.’ She began to poke around in a coagulated mass of things on
top of the bookcase. ‘What’s that?’ She held up a long silver object.
‘That’s a supersonic whistle,’ said Donald.
‘Supersonic!’ said Felicity. ‘What’s it for, then?’
‘People use it for calling dogs,’ said Donald. ‘It makes such a high note that
only dogs can hear it and humans can’t.’
‘That’s silly,’ said Felicity. ‘Why not call the dogs in the ordinary way? Of
course, if it were a supersonic dog like -’ She stopped, since the existence of
the infernal Liffey was a secret between herself and her brother, and putting
the whistle her lips blew into it hard.
A thin piercing sound emerged. ‘Oh, it’s sonic!’ said Felicity disappointed.
‘You have to blow harder,’ said Jimmy Carde, ‘and then the sound disappears.’
Felicity blew harder, the note rose higher and was succeeded by silence. ‘How
do I know it hasn’t gone wrong?’ she said suspiciously.
‘It makes people neurotic,’ said Carde. ‘They hear it without knowing and it
makes them feel queer. Chaps used to do it at the Nuremburg rallies, to
demoralize the other chaps.’
‘What are Nuremburg rallies?’ asked Felicity.
‘You’re too young to know,’ said Carde. Ask your big brother to tell you
sometime.‘
Felicity blushed, and said to Donald, ‘Can I have it, please? You don’t want
it, do you?’
‘Take it, Fella,’ said Donald magnanimously, ‘and come and blow it outside
chapel during Evvy’s sermon.’
‘Have you seen Demoyters’ glamour girl?’ said Carde.
‘No,’ said Felicity, ‘who’s that?’
‘Sleetie Carter,’ said Carde. ‘She’s painting Demoyters’ picture. Revvy Evvy
wanted her in his house, but Demoyters pinched her instead. She’s one of the
rakish kind.’ He burst into song.
‘A nice girl, a day-cent gur-ril, but one
of the rakish kind.’
‘Is that her real name?’ said Felicity.
‘She’s called Rain Carter, for some obscure reason,’ said Donald.
‘I saw your dad showing her round,’ said Carde. ‘He didn’t look as if he was
fed up either. I wonder if Demoyters has made a pass at her yet?
‘I think it’s a pretty name,’ said Felicity. She felt extreme dislike for Jimmy
Carde. Her eye roved round the room. She wanted to change the subject.
‘Oh!’ said Felicity. She had just seen something in the corner, peeping out
from under a pile of coats and sweaters. She pounced upon it, and began to pull
it out. It was an extremely long coil of fine nylon rope.
Felicity felt dizzy if she stood on a step-ladder, and she shared her mother’s
horror of the whole idea of climbing. ‘Don,’ she said, ‘you
promised
you
wouldn’t!’ She knelt down with her arm thrust through the coil of rope, as if
she were going to take it away.
‘Oh, cut it out, Fella,’ said Donald, ‘why are you fussing about promises? You
never keep any! Anyhow, this silly rope doesn’t mean a thing.’
‘Don,’ said Felicity, ‘you’re going to
climb
something. What is it?’
‘The school tower,’ said Carde.
Felicity knelt there petrified. There was a moment’s silence.
‘Shut up, Jimmy, you fool,’ said Donald, ‘and now for Christ’s sake go away, I
mean you, Jim, not Felicity. I want to talk family policy with her, since she’s
bothered herself to come.’
‘Ah well,’ said Carde, ‘Ah knows when Ah’s not wanted. See you in the usual at
the usual.’ He sprang out of the door like a small panther and banged it behind
him with his foot.
Felicity came over and seized the cuff of Donald’s blazer. He was dressed for
cricket. ‘Don,’ she said, ‘Jimmy didn’t mean it, did he, about the tower?’
‘Of course not,’ said Donald, not meeting her eye.
The school tower could be climbed, but it had been done only once in recorded
history, by a man who was now an Under-Secretary in the Ministry of Town and
Country Planning. He had placed upon the topmost pinnacle the traditional piece
of porcelain, which had remained there for weeks until the games master had had
the sporting idea of shooting it down.
‘If you’re going to climb it,’ said Felicity, ‘I’ll tell the parents.’
‘You won’t do that,’ said Donald easily. Felicity never told. ‘And just be
careful what you say in conversation. Any breath of this, and Carde and I would
be expelled. You don’t want to ruin my career, do you?’ There was an inflexible
rule at St Bride’s that any sort of climbing on the school buildings was
punished by immediate expulsion. This had been established after one or two of
the easier climbs had tempted a few amateurs. The tower, however, was
notoriously difficult, the chief problem being a fierce overhang which had to
be negotiated a little way from its base.
‘You’d kill yourself,’ said Felicity. She was extremely upset. ‘Please, please,
please
don’t do it, Don. I’ll give you my camera, the new one, if you
won’t do it.’
Donald detached his sleeve, and taking his sister’s arm in a friendly grip,
twisted it vigorously behind her black. Fella, darling,‘ he said, ’just don’t
make a fuss. If there’s one thing I can
not
stand it’s women making a
fuss. Carde and I won’t attempt it unless we’re sure it’s absolutely safe. We
probably won’t attempt it anyway.‘
‘You’re hurting me, Don,’ said Felicity. ‘What are those drawings on the
table?’ She dragged her arm away and pulled several sheets of paper out from
under a pile of books. They were sketches of the tower from different angles,
showing its various profiles in detail.
You see how business-like we are,‘ said Donald. ’Once we’re past
here,‘
he pointed to the overhang, ’it’s child’s play. And we have an ingenious plan
for doing that. But we probably won’t do it at all. It was just an idea. Carde
said it partly to upset you.‘
‘Don,’ said Felicity,
‘please!
I’ll do anything you like. I’ll do any
dare for you if you’ll not do it. Dare me anything.’ There was an
old-established usage between them whereby if one wished the other to drop some
cherished plan he would have in exchange to accept any dare that was named.
This arrangement had not been invoked for some time.
‘Well,’ said Don laughing and lying back upon the table, ‘what shall I tell you
to do? What about making another raid for the Power Game?’ The Power Game was
an invention of Felicity’s dating from long ago. It was a sort of eclectic
witch-craft, which involved the purloining from the individuals who were to be
bewitched of various intimate articles, such as socks, stockings, ties, and
handkerchiefs, which were subsequently to figure in the various rituals and
ceremonies. The main point of the Power Game, however, as it turned out, had
not been the actual magic but rather the preliminary raids. In the course of
these raids a number of highly cherished prizes had been taken, including some
underpants of Mr Prewett, Mr Hensman’s braces, and an elegant sponge-bag
belonging to Mr Everard, none of which had in fact been put to any magical use.
‘All right!’ said Felicity, tense and flushed, ready to dart away. ‘Name
anybody you like.’
‘Oh, I don’t know, said Donald, waving a careless foot in the air, ’what about
- oh, I don’t know - what about - what about - Miss Thingummy Carter.‘
‘Fine!’ said Felicity. ‘I start now. Where did you say she was? Staying with Mr
Demoyte?’ She made for the door.
‘My dear girl,’ said Donald, shooting up like a jack-in-the-box. Stop! I’m not
serious. You know we dropped all that long ago.
‘I haven’t dropped it,’ said Felicity. She was near to tears. ‘Liffey is
outside,’ she said defiantly, ‘and I nearly saw Angus on the road.’ Angus had
been a frequent ally in the Power Game raids. The translated and immaterial
Liffey was Felicity’s own private familiar.
‘Oh, do leave all that old stuff,’ said Donald, ‘and for heaven’s sake don’t
cry. You’ve been making a frightful row already. Anybody might have heard you.’
‘Well, I’m going on that raid,’ said Felicity, wiping her eyes. ‘You agreed to
it and you can’t take it back now. And if I do that you’ll have not to climb
the tower.’
‘Stop shouting, Fella,’ said Donald. ‘If Prewett passes, we’re both for the
high jump. Look, I’ll see you out of this place. You’re giving me the jitters.
Now follow me and keep your mouth shut.’
Donald quietly opened the door of his room and looked both ways down the
corridor. Distant sounds floated in, squeals of laughter, a gramophone playing
jazz, a dull sound as of cricket stumps being rhythmically beaten together.
Donald waited. Then seizing Felicity by the wrist he dragged her out of the
room, took the stairs at a leap, and in an instant had her outside the back
door. Here he let go of her and ran ahead into the wood, zigzagging rapidly
between the trees. Fleet-footed Felicity sped after him. A moment later they
had reached the wall and could hear the roar of traffic on the road just on the
other side. Donald ran quickly along beside the wall until he came to a certain
place. Here it could be seen that for a length of about eighteen inches the
broken glass had been removed from the parapet.
Donald leaned crouching against the base of the wall. ‘Jump on my back, Fella,’
he said.
This was a familiar routine. Felicity jumped. Donald rose slowly until he was
standing upright, with Felicity standing upon his shoulders, her clambering
hands now reaching the top of the wall, and her head well over the top. She began
to pull herself up. Donald helped by putting his hands under her feet. She got
into a sitting position on top of the wall and then gingerly transferred her
legs over to the far side.
She looked down at Donald. ‘Don,’ she said, ‘I’m going on that raid. I’m going
now.
And remember you promised.
‘I didn’t promise anything!’ said Donald, exasperated. ‘Now shut up, Fella, and
get down off that wall before someone sees you.
‘I
am
going!’ said Felicity.
‘I forbid you to go,’ said Donald,‘and I won’t pay you anything if you do. Now
get
down off that wall.
‘I’m going
now,’
said Felicity, ‘and if you don’t keep your promise I’ll
never speak to you again. She addressed herself to the task of getting off the
wall. It was a big jump. She let herself down as far as she could, and then
closed her eyes. Next moment she was rolling over in the grass. She called,
’Good-bye, Don.‘
‘Wait a moment,’ said Don’s voice from the other side of the wall. There was a
prolonged scrabbling sound. Then Donald appeared on top of the wall. He drew
his feet up, half rose to a standing position, and then sprang down towards
Felicity, staggered, and fell at her feet. He recovered himself quickly and
then started walking primly up the hill as if nothing had happened. Felicity
ran beside him.
‘Look here,’ said Donald, and he sounded angry, ‘you’re going home now. I’m
going to see you to the house and we won’t hear any more of this awful rot.’
‘You can see me home,’ said Felicity easily, ‘but you can’t keep me at home.
And as soon as you go I shall go off on the raid. Do look at Liffey. She’s seen
that big black dog and she’s waving her tail. Can you see her tail? Shall I
call her with the supersonic whistle?’
Oh, shut up,‘ said Donald. ’Felicity, I will not be blackmailed by you.‘
‘How do people stop themselves being blackmailed?’ asked Felicity.
‘Listen,’ said Donald, ‘if you go on this silly raid I shall have to come too.
And if we’re caught, everyone will think it was my idea.’ They had passed the
school gates and turned into the green-shaded maze of roads near their own
house.
‘If Demoyters catches us,’ said Felicity, ‘he won’t report you to Evvy. You
know he never reports anyone to Evvy.’
‘Maybe not,’ said Donald, ‘but Demoyters can be quite unpleasant enough on his
own account’
I’m not afraid of him,‘ said Felicity. ’If you are, you needn’t come.‘
‘I’ll torture you when we get back, Fella,’ said Donald. ‘If anyone spots us,
by the way, we met a few minutes ago by accident.’
They came down an overgrown gravel track between some garages and emerged on to
the fields that lay between the housing estate and Brayling’s Close. There was
no shade here and the golden expanse was crackling in the heat. The hay had
been cut for some time and the grass was sharp and stubbly and very dry. The
footpath was crumbling and dusty. The hot weather had lasted a long time.
Felicity led the way, and they walked on in silence until they could see
distantly through the trees the rosy colour of the bricks and the glint of
windows. They paused. Then Felicity saw Angus.
He had taken the form of a gipsy, and was sitting not far from the path on the
edge of a dry weedy ditch. He sat with one leg down deep in the tall grasses of
the ditch, and the other folded upon the shorter grass of the meadow. He sat in
a dignified attitude with his head thrown back and his reddish brown neck and
chest exposed. He looked straight at Felicity. His face had a sort of
expressionless gravity. He was rather frightening. Felicity knew that it must
be Angus because of the weird aura that surrounded him, and because of the
strange unexpected manner of his appearance. This time it was certainly Angus.
She wished that he would not take on these somewhat disconcerting forms, but
she supposed that it was impossible for divine beings to manifest themselves
without being alarming, even when they wished one well. He sat so still that he
was almost invisible. Donald had not seen him, and Felicity decided not to
reveal his presence. She took Donald by the sleeve and led him a few paces on until
the gipsy was hidden by a hedge.

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