The Romance of Nick and Layla (Parts 1-3) (25 page)

"You’re too cute."

Nick appeared with the baby bag and a posessed look on his face. "Guard him with your life."

"You’re both crazy. Let’s hope my little nephew skipped those genes." He took the baby in his arms and snuggled against his ear, leaving a kiss on the soft tendrils of blonde hair on his head.

"Not likely." I kissed Tyler on his nose and gently rubbed my finger across the bridge of his nose before Jack took him and left. "Am I supposed to feel like I just handed over my soul to your brother?"

"I think so."

"Is that how you feel?"

"In spades."

"Me too." I shut the door and looked at Nick. Fatherhood was starting to look good on him. "Come on Daddy. Help Mommy find room in the closet for all of her pretty new things."

"When will he be back?" Nick was still staring at the front door.

"In four hours. Hey, could you do me a favor? Would you mind making me a sandwich while I start on the clothes? I haven’t eaten and I’m starved."

"Yeah sure. I’ll meet you in your closet."

"Done deal." I watched as Nick walked off. He had that look on his face like he was thinking too much. This might put a damper on things.

Less than five minutes later Nick entered my bedroom, opening the door with his hip as his hands balanced two places with food. "I put ham on yours becau..." he trailed off. He nearly dropped the plates to the ground but caught them before the food flew off the plates. "Layla..."

It might have been the dress I had slipped into. It might have even been the fact that my legs looked a mile long stacked in the 4-inch Louboutins. But whatever it was, it had worked. More than successfully. "You okay there, sport?"

"Uh, I, eh, yeah, I am, eh, uh..." Totally incomprehensible.

"What do you think?" The dress couldn't have looked this good even if I was at my pre-baby weight.

"I uh, ahem," he cleared his throat. His eyes were all over the place. "It’s a really nice, um, dress, yeah. I better put these down." He set the food down on the dresser and looked back at me.

"You should see the detailing on this dress. It’s remarkable. It’s Zac Posen."

"Who?"

"A designer," I laughed. "Here sit down." He hesitantly cleared off a space on the bed and sat down. "Look how intricate the beading is." He looked and nodded his head. It was obvious he was trying so desperately not to look at me. "Actually, I like what’s underneath the dress better." With a quick zip the dress slid off my body and fell to the carpet in a cloud of beads and silk and taffeta. I could hear the breath catch in Nick’s throat. His eyes were glued to my chest where a black lace bra barely covered my fuller breasts. My once flat stomach still had a delicate curve, but I felt more beautiful than ever. "Nick are you okay? You look a little pale." I leaned down on my knees, in between his legs, as it were, and put a hand to his face. "Are you okay?" His eyes locked on mine and I could see them grow heavy. "Sweetie you’re burning up. Let’s get you out of these clothes."

I picked up the hem of his shirt and lifted it up, but only enough to reach the belt buckle on his pants. "Here, this will give you some room to breathe." I unclasped the belt and un-looped it from his jeans. "Better?" He just stared at me, his chest rising with each deep, slightly calm breath. "No you still look pale. Let’s undo this too." I unsnapped his jeans and unzipped them halfway. My eyes traveled up his torso to his eyes and I couldn’t help the devious smile that came upon my lips. "Better now?"

"Are you trying to seduce me?" His voice was deep and had a bit of rasp to it, like it had fought its way out of his body and into the air between us. It was sexy as hell.

I stood up and took his shirt with me, throwing it behind me onto the floor after it slipped off his body. My knees found a spot on the bed as I straddled him and placed a kiss on his cheek. "Is it working?" I leaned further down into him, pushing shopping bags off the bed and I laid him down. "Your move." His body responded beneath me and I ached to feel him.

He touched me as if he never had before. There was a slight hesitation in his hands as they gently found my hips and thighs, but after a moment they relaxed, spreading warmth across my skin.

"Don’t be rough," I whispered hoarsely, half of my confidence gone as the reality of the moment sunk in.

His hands stopped. "What?"

I couldn’t help feeling vulnerable as I was prepared to say my next sentence. "Don’t be rough on me."

"I would never..."

"We’ve both been rough. But I’m still recovering and things aren’t entirely back to normal down there. So don’t get rough."

"Are you sure you want to do this?" His hands moved from my hips to my face, cupping them with great care as he stared up at me, concern clearly on his face.

"Nick, I haven’t had sex since before we got divorced. I’m pretty sure I want to do this." But my resolve was shaken.

"I meant are you sure you want to do this with me?"

"Unless you’ve got another guy hidden in the house somewhere, you’re my first choice."

He was quiet for a moment, then, "I can’t."

He tried to gently move me from on top of him but I pushed back against him, placing my hands around his neck until my fingers met the valley of newly shorn hair on the back of his head. "But I know you can."

"Layla, you just had a baby a few weeks ago. And as much as I want to... I just can’t. I don’t want to hurt you. Let’s wait a while. If for nothing else then for your own body." Begrudgingly I let him pick me up from on top of him and placed me back on my feet.

I felt defeated. And deflated. And I wanted to cry. Nick was turning me down for sex. And then I did cry.

He cupped my face in his hands and forced me to look at him. But I couldn’t. My pride was bruised. "Baby please don't cry!" he soothed.

"I need to be touched, Nick. I need to be loved. I want so desperately to be made love to."

He didn’t say anything. He got up from the bed and retrieved his shirt from where it had landed on the floor. He came back to me, took me hands and sat me up on the bed. He slipped the shirt over my body and then slid off my new shoes, one by one.

I could barely even see, the tears were so blinding. I felt pains all over my body, physical and emotional. I could feel Nick moving around me, hear the sounds he was making, but I had no idea what was going on. All I could feel was my own shame and embarrassment. I could only see my own tears.

A light switched off. I felt the bed sheets covering my body. And then I felt Nick. I felt his arms wrapped around me. I felt the warmth of his body next to mine and I started to fall asleep.

"I’ll always make love to you."

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Fourteen Months Later

Who’d have guessed that Doctor Brown would turn out to be such a funny, sweet and interesting person outside of the office? We had since parted ways as Doctor-Patient and became shopping pals and ladies who lunch. Jess - who’d even thought she had a first name? - and I got together every Wednesday for lunch and shopping, a ritual we’d started almost a year ago. Somehow my shrink had become my best friend. Usually it happens the other way around. But then again I’ve never believed in doing anything in a traditional manner.

"So have you heard from the ex?" she asked me over lunch at a bistro on a sunny afternoon.

And he was the start of it all. "It’s the longest we’ve gone without so much as speaking to each other, if you don’t count the first 20 years we didn’t know each other."

"Wow. I thought for sure he’d have at least called by now."

"Nope. Nick works everything in his own time frame and, well you know men, they can’t multitask. Making a phone call in between interviews overseas in Japan just takes too many arms I guess." It should have been funny. I fake laughed anyway. You could tell the difference.

"Well if not for you then at the very least he should call for Tyler. I mean, he’s fifteen months old now. Nick’s already missed out on eight tenths of his son’s life. The first four years of a child‘s life are the most formative. We may not remember anything before the age of five but those cognitive processes are there."

"Wow Jess." I looked at display on my cell phone. "Only ten minutes into the conversation before you whipped out the five-dollar psych terms on me. " We both laughed. For real this time.

"Oh God I’m sorry. Occupational hazard."

"Don’t be, you’ve improved so much. And thank you for not charging me for these lunches."

"I don’t have to since you always pay."

"Correction, Nick always pays."

She sucked her tongue between her teeth so it made a particularly annoying sound. "So he’s still sending you money?"

"Once a week, just like an allowance. Plus a check once a month for child support. I guess he just wanted to make sure that we was providing for his child every legal way possible, even though the law doesn’t know that he’s never here."

"Well it’s still saying something on his part. He understands his responsibilities, at least financially. It’s a good thing, Layla."

"Yeah but the whole allowance thing kinda gets to me once in a while. You know, I think to myself, Is he paying me off? Is he bribing me for something? And you know what I do when it all just gets too much for me?"

Jess took a sip of her wine and shook her head.

"I buy a shit load of shoes."

She couldn’t hide the rolling motion her eyes made with her laugh. "That’s bad, Layla!" Though she did look amused, and maybe even a bit proud.

"Well if it’s my allowance then I feel I should buy myself something special. Although half the time I just want to tear up his checks." Truthfully most of the time the money went straight into my bank account. One day I considered starting my own trust for Tyler, but stopped when I realized it would never match the one Nick had already set up for him. It wasn't a competition, but I still felt beat. Instead I looked into a college fund and knew even if I couldn't give him a lifetime of financial security, I could help give him something just as important.

"Then why don’t you? It’s not like you need the money."

I took a bite of my salad and shook my head. "I get more satisfaction this way. Besides, I figured that in five-inch heels I’ll be taller than him."

"I didn’t know that was so important to you."

"Not really. I couldn’t give a shit about it all. He’s gone, you know, and my life isn’t ruined and I’m certainly not going to let my son’s life be ruined by it. But when I think about how, in twenty years when VH1 is interviewing Tyler for his father’s Behind The Music special that they’re going to show the pictures of Nick all over that celebutard, of all people in the world, whose name I refuse to even think about." Though with it all over the Internet it was pretty difficult to ignore.

"Layla, now remember we said we wouldn’t talk about her again."

"I know, I know. But come on she has the intellectual depth of a jellyfish. And then last month he was in LA and seeing some Playboy Playmate. No wonder the man turned me down for sex fourteen months ago. Why sleep with me when he could sleep with a socialite or a Playboy model? I can’t compete with that."

"Oh come on, sweetie. You’d win. Hands freakin down! You’d win! You’re the mother of his child! You’re always going to be the comparison."

I eyed her suspiciously as I sipped from my glass of wine. "What do you mean?"

"Well when men date they often compare their new conquest to their former relationship. In Nick’s case, he’s comparing every girl - the jellyfish, the Playgirl - to you." That’s a comforting thought.

"Yeah, and he’s still choosing them."

"Well would you rather have him choose you?"

"Not now. Not without some serious penile cleansing and a panel of STD tests. I just don’t want my child to be exposed to that world. You know with the way things are now I’m home all the time with him, I can take care of him, he’s never going to need to want for anything, and he doesn’t have to see his father and his conquests."

"I guess you have a point." We both sipped from our wine and allowed the moment to pass. So where are we headed today?" Jess asked after a long moment.

"Sephora. All the way. I’ve got a long list of essentials I absolutely must buy. Come on I’ll buy you a makeover too!"

"Layla, Sephora’s makeovers are free."

"True. So we’ll also flirt shamelessly with the makeup attendants, which produces a feeling almost matching that of the exhilaration of spending way too much money on lipstick and blush. Especially since all the male makeup attendants at Sephora are gay."

"Is that your phone?"

"Huh?" I asked. I looked down to find my phone vibrating off the table. "Sorry. Give me a second." I didn't look at the display long before tapping the green icon. "Hello? This is Layla Garrett, who’s this? Of course, how are you doing? Good, good. I see. Okay. Yes. Yes. Okay. Well if that’s what he wants then okay. Uh huh sure. I’d love to. No, don’t be silly I can find my way. Let me just call my babysitter. Can I give you a call back in about ten minutes? Thank so much. Bye." I looked to Jess and smiled politely. "I’m so sorry just give me a few minutes to take care of this."

"Sure, go ahead. I’ll go pay."

"Take my credit card," I offered as I pulled out my wallet.

"Save it for Sephora!" She smiled and she walked off.

I dialed the house.

"Garrett residence this is Molly."

"Hey Molly it’s Layla." I love our babysitter. Cutest thing in the world. She’s currently interning at a fashion house out of Santa Monica and she often brings me samples. I then put an extra zero on her check. "How is your schedule looking for the afternoon?"

"Well Tyler just fell asleep and I was going to work on some sketches until you got home. Why? Has something come up?"

"Yeah it’s just a tiny personal matter that I have to deal with. Could you possibly watch Tyler for an extra hour or two? I’d be willing to pay you extra."

"Of course! I don’t mind."

"Terrific. Thanks, Molly. I'll be available if you need to call my cell."