The Reluctant Bride (12 page)

“But, Mommy, I've seen them kiss before. It's no big deal,” Heather protested as she started up the steps reluctantly.

“Heather, go,” came her mom's response before
she turned to Rob with regret darkening her eyes. “I didn't mean anything—”

Rob's voice was quieter and more controlled when he interrupted her. “Not being a Christian doesn't mean that I have no respect for other—”

“I'm not saying it means anything. It was just a bad joke. Okay? Forget I said it,” Angela answered and turned to join her daughter upstairs.

Without further explanation, Rob's hand moved against Micah's back, guiding her toward the front door. “Mom, Dad, we're heading out now.”

Grace came out of the kitchen carrying two plates covered with aluminum foil. “Don't forget these leftovers. You can heat them for dinner tomorrow night.” Grace handed the items to Rob as he kissed her on the cheek.

“Thanks, Mom. Tell Dad goodnight for us. I think he fell asleep in the recliner.”

“Well, that's nothing new, is it?” she commented before turning her attention to Micah. “It's been wonderful having you with us, dear. Please come back soon.”

Micah smiled and thanked Grace for the day she'd allowed Micah to share with the family. Then Ashley, the kitten, came scrambling to Micah's feet, purring and rubbing around her ankles. “I like you, too, little cat,” Micah said when she knelt to touch the soft fur. When Micah stood up again, Rob disappeared briefly into the living room to say goodbye to the rest of the family. It was then that Grace gave
Micah a generous hug, which was readily returned by an appreciative Micah.

“You know, dear,” Grace began in a voice that was little more than a whisper, “Rob thinks he's discovered you all on his own. But I believe you are a gift from the Lord. And someday he'll see that.”

Micah, stunned by the comment, could only smile and thank Rob's mother again for her kindness before Rob reappeared, and with his hand on her elbow, ushered her out of his parents’ home and into the car.

“Whew,” he said as they headed down the street toward home. “Quite a day, huh?”

“I loved it, as soon as the getting acquainted part was over. And your mom, she's wonderful.”

Rob reached across the seat, taking Micah's left hand into his grasp. “I knew she'd be good for you.”

“She's quite a departure from what I'm used to. With my mother, there's always some wall, something between us that's not right. It's hard to explain. I think I'm simply not the kind of daughter she wanted.”

“Well, then, she wanted the wrong kind of daughter.”

“Maybe,” Micah replied and decided to change the subject. “Angela's husband didn't say much all day.”

“Dan has always been quiet, but with his drinking problem… He's made life hard at times for Liz and
the kids. He doesn't feel very comfortable at family dinners right now.”

“How do your parents feel about him?”

“Unconditional love,” Rob responded with a negative tone. “They want him to stay sober and keep his family happy, but they'll love him no matter what. He's the prodigal son they watch and wait for.”

“I thought that was your role to play,” Micah offered softly. She had thought that about him that very day.

“Now, it's Dan's,” Rob answered quietly, and they rode in silence for the next several minutes.

“Rob,” Micah began, “you can tell me to mind my own business if you want to and I won't be offended, but what happened back there between you and Angela? I've never known you to be angry with her about anything.”

Rob didn't respond right away, and Micah expected him to choose not to tell her.

“What you saw back there between us was guilt. Plain and simple.”

Micah frowned in misunderstanding, but refrained from asking further questions. If he wanted to tell her, he would without prompting.

“Micah…Liz was pregnant when she married Dan.”

“I didn't know,” was the only appropriate comment she could think to make.

“Well, that makes you one of the few people who
didn't. For my family, Liz's condition was quite scandalous at the time.”

“But that was years ago. What difference could it make now?” And, Micah considered silently, if the Granstons reacted badly to that situation, what would they think of her own past?

“None, really,” Rob replied. “I don't care much for Dan. It's difficult to feel brotherly toward someone who has caused Liz so much heartache.”

It was not Rob's statement as much as the strain in his voice that puzzled Micah. What was it that she detected? Anger, regret, guilt?

“I get the feeling that somehow, in all of this, you blame yourself,” she commented.

“Liz would never have gotten involved with him if I'd been paying enough attention to stop it. She's always looked up to me more than she should. But all this started right after Nick died…and that's when my own life came unglued for a couple of years. And Liz, she paid the price for some of it.”

“Maybe you should be a little more forgiving of yourself. You know? I mean, maybe your sister really fell in love with Dan and would have made the same decisions whether or not you approved of him.”

“I don't know. I don't think so, but she loves him now. And so do Mom and Dad. They'd all be happier with me if I did, too.”

“So, you're trying?”

“If I could just like him, that would be a start,”
he said with a smile. They pulled onto Micah's street and into their usual parking spot. “That's enough about my family. Tell me about your mother's letter.

“It was nothing, really. Just a stay-in-touch letter she sends every now and then. You know, the ‘I'm fine, how are you?’ kind.”

“That's all?” Rob asked, skepticism obvious in his tone.

“That and will I be moving soon? Or have I found a place I can make permanent? Have I spoken to Dad—”

“Have you?”

“No,” she responded.

“Could you? If you wanted to?”

“Yes, but he wouldn't be interested,” she stated and offered nothing more.

Rob hesitated, apparently hoping she would continue, but she only suggested they go inside her apartment, which they did, in silence.

Once inside, Micah began to slip out of her spring jacket, when Rob reached toward her, sliding it easily down her arms. She turned to face him, wanting very much to be in his arms, but she noticed he still wore his jacket. She looked up at him with questioning eyes.

“I'm not staying long,” he explained and remained in the entryway as Micah shut the closet door and leaned back against it with a sigh of disappointment.

“But we haven't been alone for more than a few minutes all day,” she said.

“It's better for you that we haven't been,” he stated gently.

“But I liked what you were doing to my neck when Angela interrupted us.” She smiled and moved close to him, placing both hands on his chest.

“I doubt that you liked it as much as I did,” he remarked before taking her fully into his arms. “Which is exactly why I should be leaving now.”

“Rob, don't go,” she pleaded and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek. “Not yet”

Rob's eyes darkened as he studied Micah's steady gaze. Then he kissed her once, too lightly, on the lips, and Micah surprised herself with her eager reaction to the brief touch of his lips against hers. She raised up, inviting a more intimate contact, which evoked a quiet groan from him. Then his mouth recaptured hers with a possessiveness he'd not allowed between them before tonight. And Micah responded, meeting his demanding kiss with all the yearning she'd felt for him since the very beginning now playing out in this one exchange. When Rob's mouth abandoned the softness of her lips to trail kisses down her chin, jawline and the slender column of her throat, she tilted her head to the side, exposing more soft skin for his exploration. And the thought of not having this man—
never
having this man—pierced her heart, and she moaned softly in a
bittersweet mixture of the sadness of letting him go and the pleasure he offered her. Now. Always.

“Micah,” he breathed her name as he pulled slightly away from her. “I'm trying to be a gentleman, but I'm having trouble remembering how to do that.”

“And I'm not exactly helping, am I?” she commented. Taking a deep breath, she stepped away from him.

“No, you're not,” he agreed, letting her slip from his arms. “And Liz isn't around to discourage us.”

Micah smiled. “Maybe we should call her. She might come over to supervise.”

“I'm sure she would, and she'd probably bring all three kids. That would cool things down considerably.”

“But please stay for a while,” she said. “I could make some coffee. We could sit at the table and talk.”

“No, it's time for me to leave.” He kissed her forehead lightly. “Because talking isn't what I had in mind,” he admitted with a disturbing smile.

Micah trailed a finger across Rob's lips. “I guess I've known all along that I'd never really have you. Not the way I want to,” she stated softly. “But it's never hurt as much as it does now.”

“There will be a right time for us, but this isn't it,” he assured her.

“There'll never be a right time,” she said more to herself than to him. “Because being husband and
wife is the only right time for this, and we will never be that”

“Why?” he asked suddenly. “I've never been as sure of anything in my life as I am of us. We belong together, and whether you'll admit it or not, I know you feel it, too.”

“It just can't happen. This was wrong from the beginning. I was foolish to let it go so far.”

“Micah, I don't care what the obstacles are. We can work through them.”

“No, we can't—” she insisted.

“Yes, we can, and we will. I don't care if you
are
married. I'll get you out of it. Divorces, dissolutions…it's not as difficult as it seems.”

“Married?” She laughed at the thought, but then she saw the sincerity in his direct gaze. “What would make you think I'm married?”

“It doesn't matter.”

“It matters to me! Why would you say such a thing? Do you think I could have a husband stashed away somewhere, yet get involved with you? Love you the way I do?”

“Things happen. Even to Christians. People sometimes do things they never dreamed they would do.”

“I wouldn't be unfaithful to a husband! I don't care how much I wanted someone else.”

“We haven't exactly committed adultery yet,” Rob stated.

“But there's more to unfaithfulness than falling
into bed with someone. You and I have spent
hours
together. We've laughed and eaten and held hands…and kissed until I felt I could almost die from wanting you. Do you think I would do that if I'd promised my life to some other man?”

“Micah—”

“And if you think that, how could you trust me to belong to you? All you'd have is a relationship with a woman who has already cheated on one husband.”

He studied her thoughtfully for a moment. “I know you, Micah. Regardless of what's happened in the past, what we have together is real. I'd take my chances.” Rob turned and walked to the nearby bookcase, and pulled a small white Bible from the highest shelf. “I suppose most kids get one of these as a graduation gift from their church, a Bible with their name engraved in gold letters on the cover. But why does yours read, ‘Micah Marie Jamison’?”

“You had no right to go through my things—”

“I'm sorry if it seems as if I pried, but I need to know,” he interrupted. “Why is your name Shepherd now? What happened in the last decade to account for the difference?”

“Well, certainly not a marriage,” she replied and sank into the chair behind her. There was no avoiding this subject now. “I had it changed, legally changed, when I became an adult.”

He returned the leather-bound book to the shelf. “How did your parents react to the news?”

“My father asked me to do it. Ordered me, actually.” Micah answered the questions, knowing there would be many more.

“Why, Micah? Why would a parent do that to a child?”

“Because our name had gained a lot of notoriety in the community. In the whole area, really,” she said and sadly shook her head. “The trial you've asked me about was my father's, as I've told you.”

Rob stood silently watching her begin to explain her past

“Like I told you, my father didn't just steal some money, he embezzled it—lots of it—from the company he worked for. He's still in prison as far as I know. Mother and Father suffered through a terrible trial.”

“And so did you,” he added.

“Yes, well, the publicity was heavy. Everyone knew about it. And it was far more scandalous than what happened with Angela and Dan, believe me. I wouldn't want to see your family's reaction to this—”

“I'll take care of that. Tell me the rest”

Micah folded her hands in her lap to steady them and looked down at the floor rather than into Rob's eyes. “We had a beautiful home then…new cars, clothes, vacations several times a year …it was a lavish lifestyle. And, apparently, at least some of it was financed with money that wasn't ours. Anyway, once my father's trial was under way, there were
stories and photos of us in the local news, coming and going to the courthouse.” She paused and rubbed her arms to wish away a sudden chill. “I lost everything. My parents, my home, my friends. I was only seventeen, Rob. It frightened me.”

“Is that when your mother left?”

“She stayed until the trial ended. Then she left for Paris with a friend. A man…who I think was her ‘friend’ long before they arrived in France. She asked me to go along, but I refused. We'd never gotten along well together, and without Dad as a buffer between us, I knew it wouldn't work.”

“What did you do? I mean, you were just a kid.”

“I went to a church I had visited a few times earlier that year. And I just sat there in a pew one afternoon, wondering what I was going to do. A woman came up to me and wanted to talk. She turned out to be the pastor's wife. I think the more we talked, the more I cried. And pretty soon, she was crying, too. Oh, Rob, she was so kind, caring, compassionate…. She was everything I needed her to be.”

Rob moved to Micah's side and placed a hand on her shoulder without saying a word. His touch against her arm was gentle, and she reached up to take his hand.