The Queen's Curse (24 page)

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Authors: Natasja Hellenthal

BOOK: The Queen's Curse
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‘Yes it does, but I cannot imagine that anyone can live only on this drink. Did Shanta not miss all the pleasures and variety of food?’

‘Woodchildren do not care much for food, being more spirit than body
,’ Tirsa commented, lowering her head and shrugging her shoulders, like she, herself, didn’t care much about food either.

‘You know, Tirsa, I have to confess I do not know an awful lot about Woodchildren. To be honest
, I never knew about their existence. I thought the storytellers had made them up. All the things I do know now I learned on this journey from you.’

She looked up from the gentle river they were sitting at to stare into the deep blue pool of
the queen’s eyes.

‘Do you know them personally?’

It was not forbidden to tell about the TalamhClann to humans, but because Tirsa knew an encounter with those delicate creatures was special and always felt she was very lucky to know them, she was very cautious in telling fellow humans about them, for the simple fact that if they remained a mystery to them and they still rather feared them, they would remain safe. She always feared that one day humans, as they had done with so many other creatures, would destroy them, if they could of course. Even if they did not have a reason or an excuse to kill, they would find one.

Telling Artride perhaps would be all right, for she trusted her now. But even so
, she felt reluctant, as if she might reveal or expose them somehow. As when you shared a secret with more than one person, it somehow lost its magic.

‘I did once
,’ Tirsa answered solemnly, and her face turned blank.

Artride sighed longingly. ‘I would have given anything in my childhood days to have met a real Woodchild
; it would have made a big difference. But I guess they fled the Royal Woods a long time ago,’ she said cynically and made a funny face. ‘Are they common in Zoria then?’

‘They are for the ones who truly care to look, but only if your intentions are good. They know, you see. Like Shanta still knew somehow even if she was under a spell. Well
, they know if a person has a good heart and if
they
want to be seen;
they
will decide, not you.’

‘Ah.’ Artride tilted her head and her eyelids drooped seductively. ‘How come you are so special?’

‘Pardon?’

Artride
laughed. ‘I mean, why you? Did they ever mention why they choose you?’
I can guess of course.

Tirsa
got up and her voice drifted off while she said, ‘One time I was still innocent, like them perhaps. A child has more chance of seeing them.’

‘So you do not anymore?’ Artride got up as well, rolling
up her blanket.

‘I am afraid the last time I saw and spoke
to one, not including Shanta of course, was about three years ago. They said I had changed. They said–’ and Tirsa drooped her head, ‘that I had become human.’ She swallowed hard.

‘And that was a bad thing?’

‘Oh, yes! Basically, they despise humans and sometimes pity them, but I obviously let them down for I had promised them not to become human–’

‘But Tirsa, you are.’

‘No!’ and more softly she added, ‘Yes, but I did not want to.’

Artride bit her lip, thinking about something she could say to her.

‘They don’t recognize me anymore.’ Tirsa said glaring at her hands, trying to restrain herself. She would not allow herself to cry.

‘Why are they called
“children”?’

Tirsa drew in a deep gulp of morning air
, scented with mulch, moss and leaves of the many bushes and plants about. She nodded to the west and led the way for the continuation of their quest; walking with Artride beside her, she answered, ‘Because they always appear rather young and innocent. However, they can get very old; they can live for up to four centuries and their skin and looks will hardly show any sign of age. And, they want to be called ‘children’ because they see themselves as children of Talamh; perhaps more than us and they act very much like children. They are still in wonderment and awe about the smallest things; they laugh a lot and like to play games and do tricks, like Shanta. But even so they are very mature and wise.’

‘Don’t they confuse being human with growing up then?’

‘I don’t think so. Perhaps grown-ups tend to forget what it is like to be a child and Woodchildren just remember us for that fact. If I … had stayed more youthful then perhaps …’ and Tirsa shook her head. ‘Never mind.’

‘Hmm, I often wish I could be a child again when it concerns being carefree, well you know that now. However
, I am glad I am all grown-up and can make my own decisions, taking responsibility, even though it can be difficult at times to do so.’

‘Yeah.’

‘And being grown up has its advantages too.’

‘I would not want to be a child again,’ Tirsa said, ignoring the
queen’s remark and the seductive glint in her eye. ‘They don’t take you seriously, and the wait to reach adulthood tends to be so long.’

‘I agree on that.’

She noticed Artride had a ring on her left hand. It was a golden delicate ornamented ring with a tiny round blue gem attached to it. It seemed to glow from within.

‘Your ring
, it is beautiful, Artride.’

‘Oh, why thank you
,’ she answered a little surprised. ‘It is my mother’s wedding ring actually. She only wore it two years, though.’

‘Before she
… I am sorry. But if it is a wedding ring why do you already wear it? People might think you are married.’ And she giggled at that.
Or was that a stupid, insensitive question?

Artride looked back at her with sad eyes. ‘I want to give it to the person I love; truly love with all my heart. And by wearing it I bond with it, so when I take it off on my wedding day
, it will be like I am giving that special person a part of me.’

Tirsa blushed and nodded. ‘That makes sense.’
How romantic.
Although Tirsa did not believe in marriage as such –. the way it binds people and the ring being a chain – but kept her thoughts to herself.

‘Do not worry, we shall find a solution for the cursed
book and you do not have to marry against your will.’

‘Well, eventually I want to marry
; I guess with the one I have chosen. Don’t you?’

‘I haven’t given it much thought
,’ Tirsa said grimly.

‘There was a person I loved greatly at one point
,’ Artride absent-mindedly said when Tirsa did not contribute more. ‘Ironically, I could not have that person.’ She bit her lip. Tirsa was stunned she told her this and was actually anxious to learn more about her love life, but held back. In her experience people tended to tell more when you didn’t ask too many questions. Therefore, when she did not respond Artride explained, ‘It was someone of my household you see; someone below my rank and well … not the right gender.’

Not the right gender?
‘A woman?’ Tirsa blurted without thinking.

It was Artride who blushed this time
, and she rubbed her cheek nervously, dropping her head, keeping her pace up past luscious meadows.

‘You are the first I have ever told.’

She did not know what to say, but her mind raced.
Is she joking? How did she keep this a secret? Is this a coincidence? Is she fooling me?

A long moment of silence followed, but Tirsa’s mind was still going full speed.

‘You do not believe me, do you?’ and she laughed. ‘It gets awfully lonely in the castle and … well, Ezra was there when I needed her.’ She was shocked how silly and selfish that sounded, and in a serious tone added, ‘I mean … there were other people to fall in love with of course; there were many other people I could choose from, men as well, but Ezra, she was the daughter of the older maid I used to have and assigned to me when her mother retired. I was eighteen and she was about the same age. Being my personal maid she cared for my room, brought me food when I wanted it, did my hair and so on. It is hard not to get to know a person like that. She became my best friend.’

Tirsa remembered the young
, pretty woman she had seen, who gave her the small package with the bread and biscuits they never even had a chance to taste.

‘I had an arduous time facing my future role; my tasks, my training and she helped me endure it all. We became very good friends and
, well – lovers. I know she really cared for me as well, but after a couple of years I understood I was asking too much of her and we tried to end it.’

She gazed around at the morning sky; a marvellous orange painted sky, a sign
that the sun was on his way. Artride sighed deeply.

‘She made it easy for me
, for she fell in love with someone else and married him; a cook. Her love for me, I realised later was more out of loyalty; the love for her queen, than for me as a person. I doubt she would have truly fallen for me if I had been a servant as well.’

‘She most certainly would have noticed you, even as a servant you would have your amazing beauty and good heart and
… after all … she married a cook, so –’

Artride smiled warmly at Tirsa
.

‘Yes, but he is a man and low in rank; that would mean they truly love each other. I mean
… I am the queen. If I had been a male, it would have been the same to her. She loved me because of my rank, like so many hate or love me for my title, not for the person I am. They do not know me,’ she said briskly.

‘Ezra obviously did, she was your friend first of all.’

Artride sighed. ‘Yes I thought so, but she worshipped the very ground I was walking on. I mean is that love? Should it not be more equal? Sometimes it was sickening and frightening how much she would have done for me. She even would have given her life for me. One time she drank wine suspected of being poisoned. It was a gift from a rival king and she drank it before I could touch it; saying that if she died, I could dismantle him and have him arrested for attempted murder. That king had always been a threat to our country. Luckily she did not die of course, for I understood he would not be so foolish to endanger himself like that. However, it shocked me all the same. From that day on I awoke and my eyes opened.’

‘Still, it sounds like love to me
,’ Tirsa quietly spoke.

‘Love
… if it were, Tirsa, she would not have married someone else. It wasn’t true love. It was admiration and obsession in a dangerous, awful way and I failed to see it.’

Would you not die for someone you loved? Have you ever loved a person that much?
Tirsa thought, but said softy, ‘Yes, loving someone sometimes comes with a price; sometimes that price is too high for a person to pay and then the only option is to let each other go.’

A long silence followed. Artride was pondering about this
, and when she felt she finally understood, her eyes filled. Tirsa noticed it and tried to lighten the mood.

‘Well, I guess it is not easy to love a
queen if you are a woman yourself. The book won’t allow a marriage, will it?’

‘No. I have to marry a man.’ It was almost a whisper.

‘Can you?’

Artride strai
ghtened her back and reflected, ‘I seriously do not know. I have always believed it is the person you have to like, fall in love with and the gender should not really matter. But I do prefer women … but it is not an issue anymore, so why bother discussing it?’

‘Why not? Because you cannot turn back safely without a serious penalty on your head for killing your uncle?’

A funny thing she mentioned my head.

‘Yes. I will die.’

‘Don’t say that.’

Artride exchanged a sad look. ‘I know I shall, Tirsa.’

Tirsa winced and a surge of fear was creeping up her back. ‘Not here, not now!’ She was really upset and angry.

Artride
smiled lightly at her concern. ‘No, not now, but soon.’

‘Does the curse ha
ve this much power then? How does this work, how long do you have?’ Upset was marking her words.

‘Not here in Dochas. Only when I return to Ceartas it will
be, not as long as I am here, but do not worry, I have not given up. It is my life we are talking about, and the lives of others; such as your brother. No, we shall continue.’

Tirsa
nodded, still looking concerned.
No wonder she initially wanted to stay here.

‘Exactly, that’s what we’ll do.’

If we do not find a counter spell, her only chance for survival is staying here after all, or moving to another country. She will not mind, will she?

‘Look, I will understand if we are not able to get a spell and you need to stay here. You have to in order to survive. I just want you to know
, I will support you either way.’

Artride reached for her hand close to her hip and
gently took it. ‘I appreciate that, Tirsa. But do not be bothered by it yet.’ She still held her hand and squeezed it lightly to comfort her. ‘My … you are really worried about me, you are shaking!’

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