The Purple Heart (46 page)

Hiroshi suddenly felt a
warm sensation on the back of his uniform and he knew it was the blood of the
soldiers seeping through to his skin. Hiroshi suddenly clawed his hand into the
dirt. He needed to feel something else to bring him out of his shock. He
clenched his fists squeezing the dirt within until he could not squeeze it any
longer. He clawed out another fistful of dirt and squeezed again when his
breathing steadied. Then his eyes opened and he realized he was alone.

* * *

Minami fought back with
every ounce of might her body could muster. She violently shook her head back
and forth in violent resistance. Kiddache reached underneath Minami’s dress and
ripped away her underwear and slid his body down onto her upper thighs. He then
fumbled for his belt but Minami bucked her body upwards sending his body off
balance. He planted his right hand on the floor and lifted himself off of her.
His dirty blonde hair was tousled and he ran his hand through it. Despite her
spirited struggle, Kiddache held Minami in place as he eyed her partially
covered breasts. She squirmed again as she shook her head from side to side
when suddenly, Ichiro let out a cry.

Minami’s attention was
suddenly frozen as her eyes darted toward Ichiro’s direction. Kiddache looked
over as well and then he turned his head back with a smile. Minami stared back
at Kiddache and looked back into his malevolent blue eyes as fear gripped her.
Kiddache felt it too and decided to use it to his advantage.

“Oh I see!” said Kiddached
hauntingly. “You’ve already got a baby. Still a no-good Jap I say. I wasn’t
aware that your boyfriend had already had his way with you. No matter. When I’m
done with you, you’ll have my baby, an all-American baby. I promise, if you
behave and do what I want, your Jap baby might live.”

Minami’s anger flared up
once more but it was also tempered by frustration. She didn’t want any harm to
come to Ichiro. He was defenseless, and there was no telling what Kiddache
might do to him once he was done with her. Suddenly, she felt a sense of
hopelessness and helplessness and tears began to well up in her eyes. “How can
you hurt a baby?”

Kiddache smirked and simply
said, “It’s a Jap, like your boyfriend.” Kiddache then released his grip on
Minami’s wrists so that he could undo his belt. He thought that his body weight
on her upper thighs would be all that would be necessary to restrain her. But
his false sense of confidence gave Minami her chance as she sharply lifted her
upper body and shoved Kiddache off of her with her hands, sending him
backwards. She turned over and reached for the bat, but Kiddache angrily got up
and caught hold of one of her ankles. She then grabbed the leg of the table
just as Kiddache yanked her towards him. The table tipped over sending the bat
falling away as Minami screamed out “no!”

The baseball glove fell
directly in front of her and her eyes fixed on it. She thrust her right hand
into the glove.

* * *

Peter moaned, grabbed at
his left shoulder, and turned over. The impact and the explosion of the mine
had disoriented him. He let out another moan. Hiroshi looked down and saw that
his friend was alive. He grabbed Peter by the shoulders and pulled him up to
the protective ridge when the last grenade rolled out from underneath him.
Hiroshi grabbed the last grenade and looked down at Peter, who was just getting
his bearings back. The machine gun continued to rattle off its bullets. He had
to stop it, he thought. He lost everyone else, but he wouldn’t lose Peter.

Hiroshi dug into his
uniform and pulled out an envelope. He opened its flap and removed from it the
picture of his wife. The photo was wrinkled from its many battle treks, but the
vibrancy of Minami’s smile and her wondrous eyes still captivated him. Hiroshi
gently kissed the photograph as a tear fell onto the picture itself. “I’ll be
home, Minami,” Hiroshi said as he tucked the picture behind the envelope and
shoved them both into his pocket. He then rolled Peter deeper into the side of
the ridge.

Hiroshi looked down at the
grenade, staring at the dark green metal, the grooves on the surface when in
his mind, the oblong shape slowly transformed into a sphere, the grooves became
two lines of red threading and the green metal turned into a leathery white. He
smiled and knew what he needed to do. He got into a crouched position below the
ridgeline. He inhaled a few deep breaths and focused. Bullets were flying left
and right, raking the top of the ridge. Hiroshi envisioned the position of the
last bunker and its small opening, where the muzzle was sticking out. The
bullets than fanned to the right and Hiroshi quickly stood up. His eyes focused
on the small opening and he could see the muzzle flashes. He took a step
backward and then took a step forward as his arm arced over his head, releasing
the grenade. The machine gun then swung back and released a hail of bullets at
him. The hungry bullets raced past Hiroshi, as streams of blood trailed three
of them. Hiroshi kept his eyes on the grenade as it disappeared into the dark
opening. The explosion was blinding and the machine guns fell silent as
Hiroshi’s knees buckled, and the rest of his body slumped to the ground.

* * *

A firm hand gripped
Minami’s left shoulder and turned her forcibly onto her back. Kiddache was
about to backhand Minami when her right hand, holding the baseball, came flying
into his left eye. The force of her strike took Kiddache by surprise, sending
him flying to his right and freeing Minami. She quickly got up with the
baseball in her right hand and yelled out, “That’s from Hiroshi!”

The dulling pain pulsated
throughout Kiddache’s head when he suddenly saw Minami swinging the baseball
bat directly at his head. He couldn’t stop it in time as the bat connected
squarely with his left cheek sending him to the floor. Minami then shouted,
“And that’s from me!”

Kiddache painfully got onto
his hands and knees in a desperate attempt to escape, but he was so
disoriented, he couldn’t even tell if his eyes were open or closed. Minami then
swung the bat onto the back of Kiddache’s head, smashing it into the wooden
floorboards. “And that’s from Ichiro, who is all American–like my husband and
like me!”

* * *

“Hiroshi!” yelled Peter.
Hiroshi slowly opened his eyes and saw the blurry face of his best friend.
“Don’t try to talk,” urged Peter. Hiroshi couldn’t feel his legs but as he
reached down to his mid-section, he realized that Peter had already bandaged
him, though the bandages were soaking wet. He knew there wasn’t much time as he
reached into his pocket and pulled out the envelope with his bloodied hand. He
held it up for Peter who refused it. But Hiroshi was insistent. His eyes begin
to flutter, blurring his vision, when his beautiful wife Minami appeared before
him. She was smiling at him in such a soothing way that it lifted away from him
all the pain he was feeling. Peter took the letter and held onto his friend’s
hand. He looked down at his best friend as tears welled up in his eyes. Hiroshi
then gripped Peter’s uniform.

“Tell my wife…” began
Hiroshi as the warm blood started to fill his throat. “Tell Minami that I
always thought of her. Tell her… tell her I’m so sorry I couldn’t come home.
Tell her… I will always love her.”

* * *

Minami continued to pummel
a sobbing and pleading Kiddache just as Minami’s father entered with Hiroshi’s
father alongside him. They had heard the ruckus when they entered the barrack
and rushed to the back. The rest of the family soon emerged from behind the
curtain. Mr. Ito saw his daughter’s torn dress and then looked down at the
sniveling white soldier on the floor. Mr. Ito suddenly cursed in Japanese as he
pulled his daughter to safety, took the bat from her and started to pummel
Kiddache while Mr. Satoh joined in by kicking him. Ichiro cried out again and
Minami’s eyes lit up. She rushed over to his crib, lifted him out and began
consoling him. Slowly, the adrenaline and the anger that coursed through her
veins started to ebb away. She then rushed back to her mother just when the
general and two MPs emerged from the partition.

Everyone froze at that
moment as the general surveyed the entire situation. He saw two Japanese men
clobbering one of his soldiers. He saw women and children huddled along to the
right of him. Then he saw Minami with her torn dress and holding her baby. He
looked down just as Kiddache turned up his bloodied face and a glint of
recognition resonated in the general’s face.

* * *

Peter suddenly looked up.
Akira had appeared out of nowhere. He didn’t speak a word, but he wore an
expression of immense shame and remorse as he looked down at Hiroshi and Peter.
He silently bent down and carefully draped Hiroshi’s right arm over his shoulders.
He looked at Peter and said, “Let’s get the fuck out of here.” Peter nodded and
hobbled down the slope and past a tree with Akira and Hiroshi behind him. He
tucked Hiroshi’s bloodied letter into his inner pocket when his ears suddenly
picked up a familiar mechanical grinding sound. He spun around in fear. Akira
had just made it to the tree with Hiroshi, when a Nazi tank took up position
right above the bombed-out bunker. The barrel of the tank pointed directly at
them. It didn’t hesitate as it fired with a thunderous boom. A shell slammed
into Akira and Hiroshi and propelled their bodies against a tree. The
cataclysmic explosion engulfed everything around them. Before Peter could react
from the horror of watching his two friends disintegrate before his very eyes,
a large fiery part of the tree came flying at him, knocking him out.

* * *

“General! I’m so glad that
you showed up just in time. These Japs just started to assault…” said Kiddache
as he began to offer an explanation. The faint distinct impression of Hiroshi’s
blue inked autograph could be seen on Kiddache’s swollen left eye.

Minami quickly cut him off
as her voice reached a crescendo that silenced everything in the room. “That’s
a lie! He tried to rape me and threatened to kill my baby if I didn’t do as he
said!” she protested.

There was total silence in
the room as the general looked at the stern but resolute face of Minami and
then the bloodied and swollen face of Kiddache. A heavy breath came from the
general’s mouth and he turned to the two MPs.

“Take that soldier into
custody and throw him in the brig.”

Minami watched as the two
MPs took a beaten Kiddache when her eyes suddenly focused on the wavering
candle flame on the windowsill, right before it flickered out.

Aiko’s grandmother and Mr.
Tanaka had finished their horrific stories. The baseball sat on the coffee
table with Hiroshi’s slightly faded autograph facing upward. No one had drunk
much of the tea as it slowly went cold. The four of them sat around the coffee
table as a shroud of silence descended upon them. Mr. Tanaka leaned slightly
into his wife, who gently held her husband’s hands. There was a disturbed look
on his face as the story unleashed a torrent of horror that could only be
imagined in war. Aiko looked over at her grandmother, who was staring silently
into her teacup. The ordeal that she had gone through was also disturbing, but
her resilience was a testament to her strength.

The silence was
suffocating. Aiko reached out for her grandmother’s warm, slender hands, and
she instinctively took her granddaughter’s hand in return

“I never knew…” began Aiko
as she paused, “How heroic Grandpa was.”

Her grandmother continued
staring down at the teacup, watching the reflection of herself stare back at
her. In that dark reflection, despite the platinum hair, she could almost see
the young and pretty woman she used to be. She nodded her head gently.

“Even though he wasn’t
there that night, he still saved my life,” said Aiko’s grandmother as a smile
slowly crept across her face.

“He was there to save
mine,” said Mr. Tanaka quietly.

Aiko’s grandmother looked
up at the man before her who she had not known until a few hours ago but
suddenly, there was a bond between them. Through sheer fate, she had learned
the fate of her husband. Even though Hiroshi did not make it home, he made sure
that someone else did. His selflessness was immeasurable.

“That sounds like my
husband,” said Aiko’s grandmother proudly.

Mr. Tanaka then regained
his composure as he thought about the man whom he had credited with saving his
own life. There was a steadfast respect for the man whom he had known as “Home
Run,” and it surged through him with confidence.

“Mrs. Satoh, you should be
proud of Hiroshi,” said Mr. Tanaka as his voice slowly built up strength.
“Hiroshi was a man above men. He was by all account a true American hero.”

Mr. Tanaka then reached
into his inner coat pocket and produced the Ziploc bag. The last letter that
Hiroshi ever wrote and the one that was never delivered. He gently held the
letter between his hands, as his expression grew guilty.

“I’ve held onto this for
many years, but had forgotten about it. I promised your husband that I would
deliver this to you. I feel deeply ashamed that I neglected that promise to
Hiroshi, and I can only hope that you will forgive me,” said Mr. Tanaka as his
voice began to tremble.

“There’s nothing to
forgive,” advised Aiko’s grandmother reassuringly, though she didn’t fully
understand what Mr. Tanaka was referring to. “The war affected many things for
many of us. Everything has its time.”

Mr. Tanaka nodded as he
looked down at the letter once again. In the handwriting of his friend, it
read, “To my dear Minami Satoh.” Without any further hesitation, he looked up
at Aiko’s grandmother. “He also wanted me to tell you that he loved you,” said
Mr. Tanaka. He then turned the letter around and extended the letter to her
with both of his hands. “Please accept this letter from Hiroshi, your husband.”

The letter surprised her.
It didn’t seem possible, but in front of her was a man who was not only present
on the last day of her husband’s life, he also had a letter from him. She
calmly collected herself but found that she hesitated. For all these years, she
lived her life without Hiroshi, but had always held him in her heart. Her own
strength and the support of her family was what carried her through her
difficult life and made her the woman that she was. But now, she was about to
read the actual last words from her long-departed husband and she wasn’t sure
what they would say. She was somewhat afraid of what the letter might say and
how it would alter her own very life. Would there be a promise in there that
she did not honor or were there expectations that would suddenly make herself
question how she lived her life? Would the words from the past irrevocably
change the present?

“Grandma, it’s from
Grandpa,” said Aiko softly. “He would want you to read it.”

Aiko’s grandmother nodded
and awoke from her conflicting thoughts. Her granddaughter was right. Her
husband wrote the letter for her and he would have wanted her to read it.
Hiroshi knew he was dying and entrusted the letter to his friend, whom he had
saved so that the letter could be delivered. In that last moment, he was
thinking of her.

Aiko’s grandmother reached
out with both of her hands. She noticed with embarrassment that her hands were
trembling. But her fingers closed upon the letter as Mr. Tanaka let go and
pulled his hands away. He had delivered the letter and completed his last duty.
Aiko’s grandmother found that her eyes were suddenly locked on the letter as
she drew it closer. Then for the first time, she read the writing on the
envelope, “To my dear Minami Satoh.”

It was an odd moment. Time
seemed to slow down. Her eyes focused on the letter with keen interest from the
yellowish tinged envelope to the dark brown splotches along the right side of
the paper. She found suddenly a sense of sorrow when she realized that the dark
brown splotches were her husband’s bloodstains. The letter had also brought
back a part of him. Her right hand flew to her mouth to suppress her emotions.

Aiko looked at her
grandmother as her entire attention was focused on the letter. She couldn’t
begin to understand the feelings that her grandmother was going through. But
she knew that it was a moment that she needed to have alone.

Aiko glanced toward the Tanakas
and as their eyes met, she realized that they felt the same way. Aiko motioned
to the front of the house, where the hallway led into the family room. They
understood, and they and Aiko stood up quietly. “It’s okay, Grandma,” Aiko said
softly, “I’m just taking them to the family room to show them around.”

As she heard the soft
slippered footsteps of the others fade in the distance, the letter seemed to
grow warmer, as if beckoning Minami. The plastic was a bit opaque from age, but
the once-white envelope showed through clearly. She ran her fingers along the
envelope and could feel the hidden letter within. It was almost as if she
wanted to really confirm that there was something inside. Was it one page? Two
pages? She wasn’t sure. She was feeling some hesitation once more but couldn’t
explain it.

She held the edges of the
seal that had protected the letter for all those years. Slowly, she pulled it apart,
as the sound of air seemed to escape from the bag. A stale smell soon emanated
from the bag itself, unlocking a long-ago time. She reached into the plastic
bag and held the envelope. It seemed exceptionally dry to the touch, brittle
almost. She eyed the wrinkles that crisscrossed the outer edges and the creases
that were like long crevasses over the terrain of the envelope itself.

She slowly placed her right
fingers onto the bloodstain itself, and a sudden sadness filled her heart. Then
she saw the handwriting on the envelope: It was definitely Hiroshi’s. This gave
the letter a profundity she had not expected.

After sniffling a couple of
times and composing herself, she straightened up and flipped the envelope over.
She pulled away at the flap and found that the adhesive that had held the
envelope closed gave way easily. It was a two-page letter in pristine
condition. Not a stain of blood had soaked through. The fibers of the paper
were a bit crisp but still soft to the touch. She unfolded the letter, and it
finally yielded its secrets, the words of a man who had written it more than
sixty years ago. Minami took in a deep breath and then began to read.

Dearest
Minami,

Every
letter that you received from me was my way of saying, “Don’t worry, I’m still
here.” As long as you received my letters, you would know that I was still with
you, and that I would be home soon. The one letter that I never wanted you to
receive was from the War Department. I strongly believed that as long as I wrote,
I could prevent that one letter from ever reaching you.

But
if you’re reading this letter, then I want you to know that I’ve put all my
heart and soul into this last letter to you. It’s the one letter that I never
wanted you to read but at the same time, it’s the one letter that I do want you
to read if I couldn’t come home.

Even
if home were still in the prison camp, it would still be home as long as I was
with you. I fought every single day longing for the day to come home to you and
our son. Please tell Ichiro that I love him. Tell him I wish I could have been
there for him. Tell him I wanted to play catch with him. Tell him I would have
wanted to be the best father a boy could ever have.

Tell
our parents, Miho, Yuka, and Yoshi that I will forever miss them. Thank your
parents for me for giving their blessing to our marriage.

To
my beautiful wife, I wish I could have had more children with you. I know you
would have been a wonderful mother to them. I would have given you the best
home to raise our many beautiful children in, enough to fill a classroom.

“Me too,” whimpered Minami.

I never wanted you to worry but I know
you did, and for that, I’m thankful. I know that I didn’t have to go, but I
hope you understand why I did. And if you hold some resentment, I hope that
over time you will find it in your heart to forgive me.

“I did,” said Minami softly.

My
greatest regret would be that I could not come home to you. At first I wanted
to fight to prove to everyone that Japanese Americans were Americans as well.
But now that I’m here and witnessed the horrors of war, it’s even more
important that America and its allies simply win the war against the tyranny
that I’ve seen. I hope that by the time you read this letter, America would
have won the war and that Japanese Americans can live the American dream.

“We did,” said Minami reassuringly.

I hope that my life and the lives of so
many other Japanese Americans will never be forgotten by America. I would want
America to know that Japanese Americans also fought for America’s freedom.

I’m
writing this letter on the night before another battle and Minami, it looks
like a hell that only the darkest of nightmares could ever conjure up. I looked
up at the looming forest whose treetops were bursting with fiery explosions.
The ground was rumbling and the trees were shaking. A sinking feeling gripped
me. For the first time, I didn’t feel confident. I could not imagine how any
man could ask another man to enter such a hell that seemed ready to devour anyone
who would dare to foolishly venture into it.

I
look at the men around me. I’m now a sergeant, so I’m responsible for these
young brave lives. They all still have lives ahead of them. They’re sons,
brothers, uncles, boyfriends, husbands and some are just kids. I hope that I
can get them all home.

I
miss Kenji. I will never forget that day when I failed him, and I hope that I
will not fail if Peter’s or Akira’s life is at stake.

“You didn’t,” said Minami as she wiped a
tear away from her face.

To
my beautiful wife, I could write pages about your beauty that no book could
ever bind, and even if one could, then no shelf could be large enough for the
books I would then write, and if a large enough shelf could be built, then no
library large enough that could ever hold them all. My love for you is
boundless, yearning to be free like torn pages soaring into the vastness of an
open blue sky.

Thinking
of the possibility of not coming home to you makes my heart sink like a pebble
into the deepest depths of the coldest and darkest ocean. It would never rise
to see the sun or feel warmth ever again, no matter how much it yearned to. It
would be forever alone.

Though
I cannot be with you, to grow old with you, I want you to go on. I want you to
live life for me and promise me you will live it to its fullest. I want you to
enjoy the freedom that I know that I have fought for you.

I
want you to gaze up at the sky and remember each animal we ever saw and when
you see Aquarius, I want you to remember me because that’s where I’ll be.

“I have,” as a smile crept onto her
face.

I
couldn’t make it home but this letter did. These words now carry every ounce of
love that I have for you and they are now forever with you.

My
love will soldier on for you and I remain forever yours. In the short time
we’ve had together, no man could have known a purer love than the one we shared
together. For what you and I had was truly ours alone.

Lovingly
yours,

Your
husband,

Hiroshi
Satoh

A tear slowly fell from
Minami’s left eye and onto the letter. The teardrop splattered and expanded
outward until the page soaked it up as if it yearned for it. “I love you too,”
she whispered. Her head sunk forward as she pulled the letter to her heart and
wept softly.