The Promise (12 page)

Yet even though Annie was as hard as nails and not given to showing her feelings, Mog knew she did love her daughter. Belle had said that the last time she visited her and told her she was expecting, Annie had said she hoped she would do better as a grandmother.

A tear rolled down Mog’s cheek. When Belle became pregnant she was so excited and thrilled she had entirely forgotten about hoping for her own baby. She’d knitted two little jackets already and made several tiny nightdresses and was just about to start on a shawl.

The clothes didn’t matter; she could give them to another young mother. What really hurt was that all those lovely little daydreams she’d had were shattered. She wouldn’t be able to walk the baby in a perambulator up on the heath. There would be no family holidays at the seaside, or filling a Christmas stocking and walking a little girl or boy to school. Dr Towle had told her this evening that he thought it would be unwise for Belle to try for another baby as there was a chance she might have been damaged internally and this could happen again.

Jimmy was going to be devastated. He’d told Mog once he’d hoped they’d have at least four children. He wouldn’t love Belle any less of course, but she knew he’d want to vent his anger on the man who had robbed and beaten her. He would never care about the stolen money or the damage done to the shop, but that wicked man had robbed Belle and Jimmy of the most precious thing in life.

Belle stirred and opened her eyes. ‘Why are you standing there?’ she asked, her voice a mere whisper.

‘Looking at you, ducks,’ Mog said, and sat down on the edge of the bed. ‘How are you feeling?’

‘I don’t know,’ she replied. ‘Have I been here a long time?’

‘Quite a while,’ Mog said. ‘It’s nearly ten o’clock at night. Over twenty-four hours since it began.’

‘I’ve been asleep ever since it happened?’

Mog realized then that because Belle had been slipping in and out of consciousness for most of the day, she wasn’t aware how dangerously close she had been to death.

‘Yes, most of the time,’ she said. ‘And you can go back to sleep again, but let me get you a drink first. The doctor said you were to have some warm milk with a drop of brandy in it. I’ll go and get it now.’

Mog returned with the milk, laced not only with brandy but with the medicine the doctor had left to help Belle sleep. She put one arm behind her and lifted her carefully so as not to jar her bad shoulder, and held the cup to her lips. ‘Drink it all down,’ she said, just the way she had when Belle was a little girl. ‘It will make you better.’

It was pleasing to see her drink it all, as she’d had nothing but sips of water all day. When she had finished, Mog plumped up her pillows and laid her down again.

‘How will I tell Jimmy?’ Belle asked, her eyes filling with tears.

‘We’ll think on that one in the morning,’ Mog said. ‘I’m going to stay in here with you tonight, just in case you want something.’

‘Come in the bed with me.’ Belle caught hold of Mog’s hand. ‘Please. I don’t want you sitting in a chair all night, you must be so tired.’

It crossed Mog’s mind that Nurse Smethwick would not approve of that. But she and Belle had often shared a bed in the past, it was a comfort in bad times. Besides, what did it matter what Smethwick thought? It was Belle’s wishes that were important.

‘If you want me to I will,’ Mog said. ‘I’ll just go down and say goodnight to Garth and get myself into my nightdress. You go back to sleep now.’

She bent down and kissed Belle’s forehead. It felt warm, but not feverish. Had her prayers been answered?

Throughout the following day Mog was on edge. Belle did appear stable, and had even eaten a few spoonfuls of soup, but that didn’t mean she was out of the woods. Mog knew that an infection could set in at any time, and that was what killed women in this situation.

Nurse Smethwick was getting on her nerves with her bossiness and superiority. She had made it clear she didn’t want Mog coming in and out of the sickroom and that left her just doing chores and worrying.

Mog had sent a telegram to Annie, and so she could turn up at any time. That would bring more tension into the house. Garth didn’t like her much, and if Annie was her usual abrasive self that would be likely to upset him. All Mog really wanted was for Jimmy to turn up. It would comfort Belle and give Garth a male ally, and Jimmy’s quiet strength would hold her together.

Then the telegraph boy came, bringing a reply from Annie. ‘Tell Belle sorry. Unable to come now. Soon. Annie’.

‘What could be more urgent than seeing her sick daughter?’ Garth said, his lip curling in the way it always did when he was holding back his real feelings.

As ever, Mog felt compelled to act as peacemaker. ‘Maybe she’s ill. She could have a difficult guest. Anything.’

‘More likely that she doesn’t see losing a baby as anything but a good thing,’ Garth said churlishly.

‘Don’t say that,’ Mog retorted. ‘Belle said she was very happy at the prospect of being a grandmother.’

‘The only thing that makes her happy is making money,’ Garth said and walked away.

As soon as Nurse Smethwick had left for the evening, Mog went up to see Belle. She was awake, and it looked as if she’d been crying.

‘What’s up, ducks?’ Mog asked, sitting on the bed beside her.

‘Wishing Jimmy was here,’ Belle said wistfully. ‘And wondering how I’m going to break the news to him.’

‘Well, you can stop worrying about that, the doctor got a message through to him and asked that he be sent home. I didn’t tell you before because I hoped if he just came through the door it would be a lovely surprise for you.’

‘Someone else had to tell him?’ Belle looked horrified. ‘And why would they let him come home for that? Unless they thought I was dying!’

Mog gulped. She might have known Belle would only think of Jimmy’s feelings, not her own needs.

‘Dr Towle said he had some influence. He thought you needed Jimmy here.’

‘And he thought it was a kind thing to let him travel all the way back home thinking the worst?’

‘I’m quite sure Dr Towle would have told the commanding officer that you were recovering, ducks. I also know Jimmy well enough to know he’d have been angry with us if we hadn’t at least tried to get a message to him. It would be far crueller to tell him the news in a letter and let him imagine all sorts.’

Belle covered her eyes with her hand and sobbed. ‘It’s never going to be the same again. All our plans have gone wrong. Jimmy’s in the army and now I’ve lost the baby. There’s nothing left.’

‘That’s plain silly,’ Mog said indignantly. ‘You and Jimmy have still got one another, the war won’t last for ever. And there’s the shop too, once you’re well again.’

Belle took her hand from her eyes. ‘You know perfectly well that neither Garth nor Jimmy will allow me to go back there again. I’ll have to be like every other wife in England, a stop-at-home. No chance to be me, just watching the years go by without anything to look forward to, nothing to achieve.’

Mog protested because she thought she must. She insisted Belle was overwrought through losing her baby and looking at things in a distorted manner. Yet she knew Belle was right. Garth and Jimmy wouldn’t want her going back to the shop, they’d be afraid for her after what had happened.

If Belle had been like any other ordinary, well-brought-up young woman, she wouldn’t be wanting anything more than just to be a very well-loved wife. But Belle wasn’t ordinary, she hadn’t had a normal childhood with a mother who did the chores while her father went out to work. At her most impressionable age she had been snatched away from her home and learned things on both sides of the Atlantic Ocean that wiped out her innocence and taught her to live on her wits.

Mog knew Belle hated class distinction, yet right from the first day she opened her shop, she’d been compelled to pander to ‘nobs’ because she couldn’t survive without their patronage. At home she was always mimicking the ladies who came into her shop, strutting around with their noses in the air and complaining how exhausted they were after a dress fitting, a luncheon with friends or even a game of bridge.

Mog, Jimmy and Garth had always found her little impersonations very comic, as she vividly portrayed the vacuous dullness of these women’s lives. They did little for themselves, and their sole aim appeared to be to see that their daughters married well and lived exactly the same way as they did.

Yet because Belle was such a talented milliner, she had achieved a special status amongst these women and had grown used to being fêted by them. She might not like much of what they stood for, but she took pride in managing to have one foot in their world. If she gave up her shop she would immediately be seen as just the wife of a publican, and those women who once treated her as a friend would drop her.

Belle needed people almost as much as she needed creativity. If she’d had the baby, she would have been a good, loving mother, but she had too much fire, imagination and intelligence to settle into a life of domestic chores.

‘It’s going to be a little while before you feel yourself again,’ Mog said carefully, for she didn’t want to go against anything Garth or Jimmy might say. ‘Just rest, get better, and talk to Jimmy when he gets home. He’s very understanding, you know that. He might not want you to continue with the shop, but I don’t think for one moment he’d object to you doing some volunteer war work.’

‘Handing out white feathers like Miranda’s mother?’ Belle said with some bitterness. ‘Or maybe you’d like me to join your knitting circle? Can you really see me doing that kind of thing?’

‘You know what I think of those stupid women who hand out white feathers,’ Mog retorted. ‘There are other roles, useful ones. So while you are lying here, instead of feeling sorry for yourself, why don’t you think about what you would like to do?’

Chapter Seven

‘All right, all right, I’m coming,’ Garth grumbled as he made his way up the cellar steps to answer the knock at the door. He knew Mog was in with Belle, Nurse Smethwick hadn’t arrived yet, and so he assumed this was Dr Towle coming earlier than usual, as it was only half past seven in the morning.

He shot the bolts back on the side door and turned the key in the lock, to find Jimmy in uniform on the other side.

‘Jimmy, my lad,’ he exclaimed in surprise and delight. ‘There’s a sight for sore eyes! Come on in.’

Jimmy took his cap off before going in, and then stopped in the hall, looking up the stairs. ‘How is she? The CO only told me she’d lost the baby, but I know there’s more.’

Garth had never found it easy to talk about women’s matters, and hesitated.

‘She’s not dead, is she?’ Jimmy asked, his eyes wide with alarm.

‘No, no.’ Garth patted his shoulder. ‘Of course not. She was very poorly, but we think she’s on the mend now. She’ll be all the better for seeing you.’

Jimmy ran up the stairs two at a time. Mog had just taken Belle’s breakfast tray from her when he burst into the room.

‘Jimmy!’ both women exclaimed.

Mog said how good it was to see him and Belle burst into tears.

She was propped up on pillows but in the daylight her face was like yellowing parchment. Mog had brushed her hair for her, but it still looked lank and dull.

Jimmy rushed to embrace her, but Mog stopped him. ‘Be careful of her shoulder and ribs, they are still hurting.’

‘Why?’ he asked, looking puzzled.

‘We’ll explain that later,’ Mog said.

Jimmy shot her a bewildered look, but sat down on the edge of the bed and caressed Belle’s cheek. ‘Don’t cry, sweetheart,’ he said. ‘I’m here now, and you can tell me all about it when you’re ready.’

Mog could hear Nurse Smethwick clomping up the stairs. ‘That’s the nurse, and she needs to bed-bath Belle and other things. You come on down to the kitchen while she’s doing that and I’ll get you some breakfast. You must be tired and hungry if you’ve been travelling all night.’

‘I’m not going to be dragged away from my wife because of a nurse,’ Jimmy declared indignantly.

Mog looked round to see Nurse Smethwick in the doorway. She was a plain, plump woman with a face like a lump of greying pastry, and she had clearly heard Jimmy’s remark.

‘Your wife, Mr Reilly, needs a nurse right now,’ she said tartly. ‘And don’t sit on the bed. Heaven only knows what germs that uniform has clinging to it.’

Jimmy’s mouth dropped open, but Belle hauled herself up from her pillows. ‘Don’t you dare talk to my husband like that,’ she exclaimed. ‘He’s travelled all night to get here from France. We are paying you for your nursing services, not to bully my husband or my aunt. Kindly remember that if you wish to work here.’

Mog smirked. She was sure Belle must be getting better if she could stand up to a dragon like Smethwick.

‘Leave them for ten minutes, nurse,’ Mog suggested. ‘Come down to the kitchen and have a cup of tea with me while I make Jimmy some breakfast.’

Jimmy smiled at Belle as Mog and the nurse left. ‘Where did you find that ogre?’ he asked.

Belle flopped back on to the pillows. ‘Mog said the doctor sent her, but I think she just manifested. A punishment for past sins.’

‘Now, tell me what happened,’ Jimmy said. ‘What did Mog mean about your shoulder and ribs? Were you in an accident?’

Belle had been trying to think of some way of watering down what had happened in the shop so that Jimmy would let her go back there, but seeing the deep concern in his eyes, and knowing how fearful he must have been as he travelled home, she realized she must tell the whole truth.

She saw his fists clench and unclench as she told him how it had all come about. Men like him and Garth were not the kind just to sit and wait for the police and the courts to mete out justice. She was fairly certain Garth had already offered a reward to anyone who would tell him the name of her attacker.

‘I’m so sorry, Belle,’ Jimmy said, putting one hand on her cheek, his eyes brimming with tears. ‘I can’t bear the thought of anyone hurting you. I’m so sad about our baby too. I can’t find the right words to comfort you.’

‘You just being here does that,’ she said, taking his hand and kissing it. She could see sores and blisters on it, and it was a reminder that where he’d been was no picnic either. ‘Go and have some breakfast now, and then have a bath and a sleep. Let the ogre come and see to me. And try and persuade Mog to rest today, I’m sure you can imagine how she’s been.’