The Pretend Girlfriend (26 page)

Trying to steady herself as best she could, she undid the locks and opened the door.

"Hi," she said.

Aiden pushed in past her. He had his suit on again, the tie loose around his neck.

"Come on in..." Gwen said, closing the door behind him. She might as well get this over with. "There's something I need to tell you."

"It's not important," Aiden said. He paced back and forth along her entrance hall, running his fingers through his hair. Gwen picked up on his anxiety. What was wrong now?

"I've been thinking," Aiden started.

A cold ball of fear formed in Gwen's stomach. He's going to call it off, she thought. We're done. Although a contrary thought occurred to her as well, that if he was calling it off she didn't need to tell him about spilling her guts to Beatrice.

"What is it?" Gwen said.

Then Aiden reached into his jacket and pulled out two folded glossy pieces of paper. "I can't be near him anymore. I keep thinking about what we talked about today..." he said.

"Aiden, what are those?" Gwen said.

He looked down at them as though not realizing that he'd pulled them out. "They're tickets."

"What kind of tickets?"

"Plane tickets... Gwen, They're tickets to get on a plane tonight, you and me, to go to London. Just the two of us. We'll be there tomorrow morning. Well... it won't be morning there, but you get what I mean."

Gwen knew she hadn't been thinking clearly as of late. She thought she understood what he was asking, but just had to make sure. "What are you asking me to do?"

Aiden stopped pacing. He came and stood in front of her, putting his hands on her hips. A corner from one of the tickets poked at her ribs. "I'm asking you to get on a plane with me tonight to go to London, England. I know you want to go; I saw that poster in your room. We can go and be away from all this. Just the two of us, figuring all of this out."

She stepped away from him, backing into the door. The chain lock rattled. "Aiden, that's crazy. You have your charities and Carbide Solutions to look after. I have schoolwork to do. There's a paper due soon, and an exam I'm definitely going to fail if I don't start studying, like, yesterday..."

Still, it had a certain appeal, a certain allure. Get away from everything. Leave an ocean between her and her real life. And to visit London, a place she'd always wanted to go, with Aiden! Was he ready to acknowledge his feelings, finally?

"I know," he said, "It is crazy. But the best ideas are the crazy ones, the risky ones. Come on; let's do this, right here and now. Trust me." He held out his hand.

The words stung, made her think of Beatrice and how she had violated Beatrice’s trust. But Beatrice was angry with her, and Gwen didn't know if her friend would ever trust her again. And if she went away, she definitely wouldn't get that essay done, or do any studying.

But what if getting away from everything for a bit really was the best idea? If she really did want things to work out with Aiden, they needed to be able to trust each other.

"Well?" Aiden said, "I need to know now."

Gwen looked down at his outstretched hand, and she flexed her fingers...

"C
ome on. Please just answer!" Gwen said.

She could hear Aiden pacing in the living room. He hadn't taken off his shoes, and they made a distinctive sharp sound as the soles contacted the floorboards. After seeing his place, she didn't feel so embarrassed about having him over here. Sure, his condo was bigger, with nicer everything, but it hadn't been as opulent as she'd expected. Humble seemed a better word.

She'd told him she needed time. Time to think this over. He'd given her one of the tickets to London, which now sat on her desk next to her laptop, tempting her.

Part of Gwen badly wanted to say yes, to throw some clothes into the cracked old suitcase at the back of her closet and then proceed directly to the airport.

Getting away would be so nice. But the problem with running from your problems is that they always manage to catch up to you somehow.

Like with school. Sure, Gwen could blow off the essay (which was going to be late now anyway) and skip the midterm. But doing so would completely destroy this semester, and then she wouldn't graduate on time because she'd need to take the courses over...

But London!
Gwen thought, looking at that poster of Big Ben.

If only Beatrice would answer her phone. They could talk things through, and B could play the roles of the little devil and angel on her shoulders trying to sway her decision.

Aiden knocked on the door, but didn't open it.

"Yes?" Gwen said, cringing.

"Have you decided? We need to get going if we want to clear security in time to board," he replied.

"Just another minute, okay?"

Why couldn't he ask me to do this over summer or something?
Gwen thought. The more cynical side of her replied:
Maybe he's planning to end the contract before then.

Gwen tried not to give that thought much credence. Their relationship went beyond the contract now. At least, she thought it did. Why would he kiss her like he had back at his apartment, why would he share those clues about his past, if this was still strictly just a business relationship?

And this looked like the perfect opportunity to explore just how far they could go. If only it wasn't for the timing!

Gwen sat on the foot of her bed and looked again at the poster, fantasizing even as she hit the call button to try B again.

They could go to all the museums, to the Tower of London, Buckingham Palace. They could eat fries (what did the Brits call those again? Gwen couldn't remember) and fish out of those cute newspaper wrappers... So many possibilities. It could be wonderful.

On the other side of the door, Aiden's cell rang. He answered it, his voice growing muffled as he paced back into the living room.

"This is B; you know what to do." It was Beatrice's voicemail. The tone sounded to leave a message, but Gwen hung up instead. She'd already left like a thousand voicemails. In fact, she was a little surprised that the service still accepted more. Hadn't she filled it yet?

It was no use, Gwen knew. She dropped the phone on her comforter, then let her body fall back against the mattress. The springs whined as she stared up at the ceiling.

I'm going to have to decide all on my own,
she thought.

And that was the problem. Gwen couldn't trust herself. Not when it came to Aiden, at least. I must be really falling for him, she realized. Apparently all it took was a handsome face and a cold attitude.

Okay, calm down,
she told herself.
You can do this. You can make the right choice.
Wasn't that what being an adult was all about: making choices for yourself? She could see the temptation to not become a grown up, then. It was definitely ironic; she'd spent most of her childhood and youth wanting nothing less than to be her own woman, and now that she was, she just wanted someone else to tell her what to do.

And right at that moment, the only other person around she could consult was Aiden. He would definitely tell her to go with him. That was obvious enough. That just meant she couldn't trust his judgment, either.

Gwen glanced at the clock, keenly aware of the little bit of breathing room she possessed closing in around her.

Grabbing up the phone, she started once more finding B in the contacts list. It was no good, she knew. It would only be her friend's voicemail again. Yet the urge, the small, guttering hope, persisted to try and call.

Wasn't that the definition of being crazy?
Gwen wondered. Yeah, it was something about doing the same thing over and over again, expecting it to turn out differently.

Looking at her desk, her laptop waiting patiently beside a pile of books, made her think about school again. She really didn't want to work on that paper, or study for the midterm. Just the mere ideas sent her stomach boiling with anxiety.

Her eyes crept up to the poster again.
In less than a day, I could be looking at the real thing!

Yes, that sounded nice. Gwen was young; there was plenty of time to get back to school. It would just be one extra semester, after all.

Her heart fluttered, and her skin broke out in gooseflesh as she arrived at her decision. The anxiety turned to excitement, and that was how she knew that it was the right choice.
I'm really doing this! I'm really going to England!
Gwen thought.

Now, to tell Aiden the good news
, she thought.

Out in the living room, she found Aiden standing by the window, facing away from Gwen and looking at her incredible view of the adjacent apartment building. He wasn't on the phone anymore. His hands rested on his hips, his elbows pointing out. It really emphasized his shoulders, and she watched them rise and fall gently with his breathing.

It was a nice, quiet moment. One she felt somewhat loathe to interrupt. But at least she was doing so with good news, right? She anticipated getting another of those rare Aiden smiles when she told him. Her fantasy continued, wondering if he would catch her up in his arms and spin her around in circles as they laughed and kissed...

"Gwen? Hello?"

She snapped out of it. At some point during her fantasy, Aiden had turned around to face her. Her cheeks heated as she wondered about how long she'd been staring at him all glassy eyed.

"Yes, hi," she said, hoping her smile might hide the flush in her cheeks.

"Is everything all right?" he said.

"Better, actually..." she took a deep breath, trying to remind herself that this was the right choice, "I'm in. Let's do it; let's go to London tonight!"

Aiden reacted in the precise opposite fashion she'd been hoping for and expecting. His eyes widened a little, he licked his lips, hung his head, and turned away from her again.

Acid started eating away at Gwen's stomach. "What? What is it? Did I take too long? I'm sorry..."

It's my fault!
Gwen thought.
I took too long deciding, and now we won't be able to catch the flight!

It was a ridiculous realization. Even if they had missed the flight, she knew, there would be more tomorrow. And it wasn't like Aiden didn't have the money for more tickets. But that still couldn't stop her for blaming herself.

Aiden shook his head, sighing his philosopher's sigh once more while he stared out the window. "No, it's not you."

Now her heart decided to detach itself and sink down through her innards. Aiden didn't want to go anymore! What had changed? Immediately, her thoughts went to him somehow knowing about her betrayal of his trust by telling Beatrice the truth about their relationship.

But how could he possibly know about that? I haven't told him.

"I'm sorry," Gwen started, "I couldn't help it..."

Aiden held up his hand to silence her. "Can it wait? I just got off the phone with my assistant. It hasn't hit the news yet. I can get a conference going and head this whole thing off before it gets out of control," he walked past her, the air stirring in his wake, "Come on, I'm going to need you there, too."

"Head what off? Aiden, what's going on?" Gwen said, deciding to follow him after a moment's pause. They went over to the entrance hall. Aiden already had his shoes on, and he looked at Gwen expectantly. She knelt, grabbing for her flats.

Just as she began slipping them onto her feet, she stopped.

"Is there something wrong?" Aiden said.

"Yes: you're not telling me what's going on," she replied. Gwen wasn't sure how to feel. Clearly, London was off the table now because of whatever this nameless assistant told Aiden over the phone. Part of her actually felt a little relief at that. Another side of her insisted this was an awful turn of events, and that it must somehow be her fault. And still another particularly annoying part told her that if the trip was off, she really needed to get back to her essay. Unable to decide which notion she wanted to side with, she did her best to ignore them all.

"I'll tell you in the car. We really don't have much time... Will you put your shoes on and come with me, please?" Aiden said, stressing the final word. All the excitement from when he'd initially burst into her apartment with his desire to run away with her was gone. So much so that Gwen wondered if she would ever see that part of him again.

"Okay, fine. But I can't possibly see what could be so important."

Gwen pulled her shoes on. As usual, Aiden held the door for her. However, out in the hall, while she tried to find her keys to lock up, he didn't wait. He started right for the elevator, jabbing at the button.

Hearing the satisfying click of the deadbolt sliding into place, Gwen hurried over to join him. "You know, pressing the button over and over doesn't actually make it come any faster. They've done studies."

Aiden shot her a look, then shoved the offending hand into a jacket pocket. The anxiety, or whatever it was inside him, still wanted a way out. He started tapping his foot. "The stairs would've been faster than this!"

His uneasiness started affecting Gwen, too. She felt it as a sudden uptick in her heart rate, and as the barely suppressed urge to start tapping out a beat to match his. These had to be the slowest elevators in the world. What, was there some guy standing on the roof turning a winch to power them or something? Maybe the stairs weren't such a bad idea.

The elevator chimed. As soon as enough space opened in the doors, Aiden stepped in, with Gwen fast behind him.

A little old lady wearing far too much perfume and a frumpy old sweater already waited inside. Her eyes widened at the sudden appearance of the young people, and she crowded back into the corner.

"Going down?" Aiden said, tugging at his jacket.

The woman nodded at him, and then he inspected the panel of buttons to make sure the ground floor was selected. Satisfied, he crossed his arms and watched the display count down the floors.

It had to be simultaneously the most boring, the slowest, and the most suspenseful elevator ride of Gwen's life. She badly wanted to shove him against the wall, jab him in the chest with her finger, and demand to know exactly what was going on. However, she couldn't. Not with the stinky old lady glancing suspiciously between the two of them. So Gwen stayed silent, forcing herself to look casual. She didn't think she blinked one the whole way down.