Read The President's Assassin Online
Authors: Brian Haig
“And the fifth?”
“Name’s Clyde Wizner. He quit about seven weeks ago. His supervisor was very surprised. He was very good at his job, there were no signs he was unhappy, or—”
I said, “General, we’ve got the fucking roof falling on top of us here. Speed it up.”
“Uh...fine. Wizner has prior military service. Used to be an EOD specialist. That’s—”
I already knew EOD specialists were experts in defusing and exploding bombs and mines. “Got it—move on.”
For a moment there was silence. Then he said, “Don’t push me, Major. That’s right...I checked on you, too. Later, you and I will discuss passing yourself off as a civilian.”
As I said, these guys are really sneaky. “At the appropriate time, I look forward to that talk, sir.”
“Well—you shouldn’t. Now, regarding Wizner, give me a number and we’ll fax over his service record and his civilian record.”
I asked Jennie for help, and she read the number off the fax machine in the far corner of the room. I relayed it to Tingle, who closed saying, “Wizner has the technical training and know-how to be the bomber. I have ten agents backgrounding him. We’ll know a lot more soon. I’ll call when I—”
“Thank you, sir.”
I punched off.
Almost simultaneously the fax machine started spewing out sheets.
I looked at Jennie and pointed at my watch. Maybe five minutes. Time was really short. Jennie looked around and asked, “Well? Do Sean and I have permission to say yes, or is it no?”
All eyes shifted back to Mrs. Hooper.
She said, “You may negotiate, but not commit.” Typical politician.
Jennie said, “That won’t do. They’ll insist on a firm answer. Yes or no?”
Mrs. Hooper replied, “I’ve given you permission to negotiate. That’s more than enough.”
Seconding Jennie, I said, “It’s not. Don’t assume these people are stupid, Mrs. Hooper. We know they’re not—right?”
She looked at Jennie, and then me. “Deal with it.”
My phone rang again. Thinking it was Tingle again, I lifted it up and said, “Look, I know you’re pissed, but we’re a little busy over here.”
I heard a harsh laugh. A voice said, “I’ll bet you’re busy as all hell, son.” The voice was male and middle-aged, with a smoker’s rasp, the accent was Texan, and the tone sounded folksy and condescending, like he held all the cards, which wasn’t at all . The man on the other end of the line was not Tingle. But neither did he sound like Jason Barnes, which was a bit disappointing.
I waved my arm, and in a tone as good-humored as I could manufacture, I asked, “Is this who I think it is?”
“You ain’t got a fuckin’ clue who I am. Let’s not pretend otherwise.”
“I do know you’ve really caused us a lot of trouble.”
“Well, hey...this ain’t good news, I’m sure, but you ain’t seen shit yet.”
Jennie had dashed around the table and now stood beside me, bent over, her face brushing mine, straining to overhear his words.
“Neither have you, pal. Seriously. The President’s hidden inside a deep hole, somewhere up in, I think, Alaska. He’s at the bottom of an old missile silo surrounded by a regiment of pissed-off Army Rangers. You won’t get him, but we will get you.”
He chuckled. “Who gives a shit where you got him hid. Never actually said we’re gonna git
him
, did we?”
“I...what?”
“Well, sheeit, boy, read the note. We never said we were gonna kill that sonuvabitch. Jus’ said he’s history. Think about it.”
Before I could reply, he said, “Hey, tell you what. Fifty million’s the price and it ain’t open to debate. You pay...we’ll quit fuckin’ with you. You don’t...the next one’ll really suck. Simple deal. Call you back in a minute.”
The line suddenly went dead.
I said, “Shit.”
Jennie said, “He’s changing cell phones. He’s using throwaways, so we can’t get a fix.”
In fact, an agent slipped into the conference room, shook his head, and said, “Too fast,” then slipped back out.
Jennie informed the rest of the task force, “We’ve been looking in the wrong direction. He says they may not want to kill the President.”
Proving that all politics is local, Chuck Wardell slid back into his chair and commented, “Thank God.”
Mrs. Hooper asked, “Then what do they have in mind?”
I informed her, “Not what—
who.
”
The phone rang and I again answered, “Drummond.”
“Hey. Well, you got an answer for me, boy?”
“Look, we’ve got a small problem here.”
He laughed, “You got a lot a problems, none of which are small.”
Asshole.
“Okay, for starters...how do we know you’re the real McCoy? We’re a little deluged with assholes calling and claiming credit. How do I know you’re the
right
asshole?”
“I like that.” He laughed again. “For a stupid butthead who’s run hisself silly the past two days, it’s real good you still got a sense of humor.” He stopped laughing. “But don’t fuck with me, son. Maybe I’ll put a Bouncin’ Betty up yer ass, too.”
Jennie overheard this exchange and whispered, “Stay cool.”
I drew a long breath. “A lot of people know Fineberg got it with a mine.”
“Yeah? Hey, guess that’s right...news gits ’round, don’t it?” He laughed again. “Now tell me, how many of them folks know how them three jerkoffs in Belknap’s basement got it? I did the little gal at the commo console myself. Three shots straight into her right side,
boom-boom-boom.
You shoulda seen that gal’s body twitch and bounce, Drummond. One of my partners did the other two, the asshole who was sleepin’ and the idiot in the chair.”
“Fuck you.”
He laughed. “Aw hell...don’t go all pissy on me. You asked for proof, I try to be helpful, and now you go actin’ like a porky-pine with a burr up its ass. Yer hard to please. Hey...call you back in a minute.”
The line went dead again. Everyone began chattering at once.
Jennie said, “Don’t let him goad you, Sean. Stay cool. This is just business.”
Mrs. Hooper ordered, “Negotiate, Drummond. Find out what they have in mind next.”
Mr. Halderman advised, “Emphasize that all the sea- and airports are completely covered. Tell him they should give up—they’ll never make it out of this country alive.”
I nearly got up and walked out. But I knew they had the best intentions. I tried to think. I glanced at my watch. Thirty more seconds. It was important to take away the initiative, but nothing was coming to me.
Jennie clearly understood this and announced to all concerned, “We have to set up a deal with these people. We need to buy time.”
Mrs. Hooper kept shaking her head.
Jennie and I exchanged glances. Not good.
The phone rang. I lifted it up, and the voice said, “Okay, Drummond, here’s the deal. You ain’t got the brass to make this decision, so probably you got a bunch of important assholes sittin’ ’round you. Tell ’em I got a target in my sights. All I gotta do is push this teeny button, and boom, this President’s got one less high-level asshole. Got that?”
“Yeah, and—”
“What’re you waitin’ for, boy? Do it.”
I put my hand over the phone and explained our predicament.
I put the phone back to my mouth. “Done.”
“Okeydokey. Now, what’s the answer? Fifty million, or you gonna try playin’ dick-around with me?”
Something in his tone sounded wrong. I slapped my hand over the phone again and yelled, “Right now—he wants an answer.”
We all looked at Mrs. Hooper. This was developing really quickly. Mrs. Hooper kept shaking her head.
Looking at her, I said, “He’s serious. Yes or no?”
She stared at the tabletop for about ten seconds. She said nothing.
Then, through the earphone, I heard a loud blast. The line went dead again.
I put down the phone. “Shit. He just murdered somebody.”
Mrs. Hooper avoided my eyes and asked, “Who?”
“How the hell would I know?”
We all looked at one another. For once, nobody said a word until the phone rang again. I picked it up and demanded, “Who did you just murder?”
“That? Aw, jus’ the head of the Republican National Committee. Hey, you believe he’s got a mistress over by Dupont Circle? Married man, too. What’n the hell’s this world comin’ to, huh? Y’know, all this shit goin’ on...and that horny bastard jus’ had to sneak off and get a little afternoon poon.” He added, “By the way, cash, used fifties and hunnerds. Oh, and none of that sneaky shit them Treasury assholes like to try. We’ll look, we know what to look for, and if we find something, it’s gonna really suck for you.”
I put my hand over the phone and informed everybody that the RNC just got a job opening. Mrs. Hooper’s eyes shot wide open. She said, “Danny Carter...he...oh God...he...” Then she suddenly started crying.
I no longer needed, nor did I wait, for a consensus or permission. I said, “Deal.”
“Well, yee-haw. Good call, boy.”
“But murder one more person, it’s off. Understand? Kill one more soul, and you’re dead. We’ll hunt you down, and we’ll find you. I’ll personally cut out your guts.”
He laughed. “That’s the spirit. By the by, yer gonna be the delivery boy. Hey, call you back in an hour.”
“No, you’ll call in two hours. We have a lot of work to do to get the money.”
There was silence for a few seconds. Eventually, he said, “Now listen up—the next asshole gets it in two hours and ten minutes. Don’t fuck nothin’ up. Keep yer phone battery charged, ’cause you and me, we gonna powwow in two hours.”
The line went dead.
M
RS
. H
OOPER SAT PERFECTLY STILL
,
CRYING AND SOBBING
. S
HE SAID
, “H
E
killed Danny. I...what could I...” A chorus of racking sobs began belching up from her stomach.
Jennie looked at Mrs. Hooper and said, “We warned you.”
Mrs. Hooper bounced in her seat like somebody had just shot a ten-thousand-volt bolt up her fanny. “I...I...”
Phyllis stood up and snapped, “That’s enough!” She looked at all our faces and said, “No more finger-pointing.” She stared at Jennie. “Understood?”
Clearly, Special Agent Jennifer Margold, who had been so compulsively rational since the start of this thing, was experiencing a rare emotional outburst. It was a human response, and I, for one, was glad to see it, glad to see that the raw pathos had gotten under her skin, and glad to see I wasn’t falling for an ice queen.
More selfishly, I was now on the hook for agreeing to a deal, and I was out on a limb all by myself. Somebody needed to make Mrs. Hooper understand that what was happening here was far beyond the calculus of presidential vanity and the pornography of electoral politics. This was a choice with human consequences, life or death. Eventually, Jennie said to Phyllis, “You’re right.”
She turned to Mrs. Hooper, who was slumped in her chair, staring at her knuckles, experiencing a sort of Pontius Pilate epiphany.
Jennie said, “That was...unforgivable. Was Danny Carter a friend?”
“Yes.”
“Was he married?”
“He and...well, he and Terry...have two kids, and I...I’ve known them over twenty years.” She looked around at our faces. “I got him this job. Danny was so energetic, so brilliant, so...so loyal.” Which apparently reminded her, and she looked at Jennie and asked, “Who’s going to notify Terry Carter?”
There was an awkward stillness in the room while we jointly considered the baffling dilemma of how you inform a wife that she’s now a widow, and, by the way, her husband died in the arms of somebody other than her, and incidentally, in a few minutes, that revolting revelation was going to be all over the tube. “When we get confirmation he’s dead, I’ll assign an agent to handle it,” Jennie informed her.
Mrs. Hooper looked more than a little relieved.
Jennie turned to Phyllis and said, “With this bargain, the Agency no longer has any justification for involvement. It’s gone purely domestic.” As if we needed to be reminded, she cautioned us, “Everything we do is going to undergo congressional and maybe public scrutiny.”
I won’t say Phyllis also looked relieved, but without sounding at all reluctant, she replied, “Of course.”
Which put Jennie in the driver’s seat and in charge of this mess. She said, “Mrs. Hooper, you need to call the President for permission to proceed.”
Mrs. Hooper returned to studying the tabletop. “He’s not going to pay them off. In any event, as his political adviser I still have to advise against it.”
I said, “Why?”
She looked up at me. “Because nobody in this country will vote for a man who pays off murderers. But I know him. He’ll say that’s irrelevant. He’ll say that indulging murderers is morally wrong and begets more murders and more murderers. He tends to be practical that way.”
Jennie looked at me. I shrugged.
Mr. Wardell chose this moment to make an interesting observation. “Incidentally, Danny Carter was not one of our suspected targets. How in the hell was he involved in this Barnes thing?”
Jennie said, “He wasn’t. He was a message.”
“What message?” Mrs. Hooper asked.
“This confirms my speculation. It’s no longer about revenge. They’re now concerned only with money and making their escape. They’re telling us they’ll murder whoever they please, until their demands are met.”
We all pondered that fresh insight a moment.
I noted the obvious. “We’ve lost our only advantage. We can’t even guess who they’re targeting.”
“That’s right. We can’t,” Jennie observed. She turned back to Mrs. Hooper. “Listen...I think there might be a way out of this for us and the President.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Simple. We use the money to lure Barnes and his people into a trap.”
Everybody thought about that proposal a moment.
Phyllis was the first to speak up. “I don’t like it.”
“Why not?”
“It will be expected. These are not stupid people, Jennifer. They’ll take precautions.”
“I’m sure they will. Entrapments are always a gamble. We have to outthink them.”
Recognizing the thought that was running through all our minds, Jennie added, “The past doesn’t always have to be a prelude to the future. Right?” She turned to Mrs. Hooper and suggested, “If this works, the President’s a bold leader who rolled the dice. If it fails, his intentions were honorable, and we screwed up the execution.”