The Preacher's Daughter (15 page)

Heat rushed into his face and his heart pounded in his chest the very second the words were out. What could he expect from a man who had raised and sheltered and taught a young woman the way he had? Lorabeth had assured him she would marry him anyway, but this moment was momentous—life-altering—to both of them.

L
orabeth had offered to do the dishes while the girls worked on their scarves and hats and the males played horseshoes. She was drawn to the side porch every five or ten minutes to see how Simon was doing. He and Flynn were a team against Caleb and the younger boys, which seemed pretty fair, considering Flynn was the best and Simon was just learning.

From the laughter and jibes that were flying between the two teams, it appeared that Simon was fully enjoying himself. The sight blessed Lorabeth’s heart to no end. Just the fact that her father had accepted the invitation still astounded her. They’d been on pathetically few visits to other people’s homes during her growing-up years, and she didn’t remember ever getting to join in the families’ leisure activities. Leisure was synonymous with idle hands, and the Holdridge siblings knew how their father felt about idle hands.

Flynn looked over, spotted her and waved. Simon turned his attention, too. She gestured for him to come and raised the hem of her skirt to descend the stairs.

“I haven’t got one to actually hook on to the stake yet, but I’ve struck it several times.” He beamed with delight.

“Good for you!” She clapped, excited that he was having such a good time doing the things ordinary people did all the time. Sobering, she leaned forward and said, “Simon, I want to tell you something.”

“What?”

“It’s about Benjamin and Father. Benjamin asked him for time alone so he could ask him for his blessing.”

Simon waited as though not quite understanding.

“Benjamin asked me to marry him.”

A look of surprise quickly turned into sheer joy. “I can tell you’re happy about it.”

“I am. I’ve never been this happy. I just want Father to approve.”

“Why wouldn’t he? Benjamin is an acceptable mate. Father approved of Ruthann’s choice.”

“You’re right. Benjamin is more than acceptable.” She gave her brother a quick hug. “Go have fun.”

He grinned and jogged back to the game in the side yard.

She returned to the house, finished drying the pans and put them away. The clock in the hallway chimed. It had barely been an hour since Ben and her father left, but it seemed like forever. She couldn’t bear to imagine their conversation one more time, so she rubbed glycerin into her hands and located the girls in the parlor. Flynn had laid a fire for them, and the flames were warming the room. Madeline had just started to fuss.

Lorabeth crossed to where the baby lay on a palette on the floor and scooped her up. “Is she hungry?”

“She shouldn’t be,” Ellie replied, “but if an hour has passed since her last feeding…” She shrugged and smiled.

“Maybe she just wants to see what’s going on with her big sisters.” Lorabeth carried her to a chair beside the sofa where mother and daughters sat and turned Madeline so she could see them.

Ellie looked at the contented baby and laughed. “Maybe she just knows it’s Sunday, and on Sunday there’s usually someone who wants to hold her.”

“Well, we can do something about that, can’t we, sweetie?” Lorabeth nuzzled Madeline’s fine hair and kissed her ear.

Ellie’s hands fell still on the red yarn in her lap. Tears came to her eyes. “Thank you for loving my children.”

Her remark surprised Lorabeth. She did love these children. She loved all of the Chaneys as though they were her own family. “They’re easy to love,” she replied. “Thank you for treating me like one of you.”

“You
are
a part of our family,” Ellie answered. “I can’t imagine you not being in our lives, and not just because of the things you do for us.”

Lorabeth couldn’t imagine it, either. The possibility that she might soon become a real member of their family humbled and amazed her.

Ellie was looking at her as though she was waiting, as though she knew there was something life-changing in Lorabeth’s next words.

“Ellie?”

“I’m listening.”

Lorabeth took note that the girls were sitting right there listening, too. But she and Ellie had developed ways to communicate in front of the younger ones without them being aware of what they were saying. She chose her words carefully. “The noun we were just using…”

Grinning, Ellie nodded and lent a feeble effort to her pearl stitches so the girls wouldn’t catch on.

“The likelihood of that becoming more so is real.”

Ellie seemed to think a minute. Her hands barely stilled before she said, “One of my siblings mentioned his intentions.”

Lorabeth nodded. “A proposal was suggested.”

Ellie smiled with approval. “Was the proposal all you’d dreamed of?”

Lorabeth glanced at the girls who had picked up on their mother’s excitement. “Affirmative.”

“What’s formative mean, Mama?” Lillith asked.

“The way the stitches are made, darling. Dinner today was important. And the ride…”

“More important,” Lorabeth replied.

Ellie grinned. “Our favorite canine physician…”

“Conversing with our mutual man of the cloth,” Lorabeth answered.

Ellie gave her an encouraging look. “It will go well, you’ll see.”

“What, Mommy?” Lillith asked. “What’s a mammoth claw?”

“It’s like a Danish roll, dear.” Ellie smiled at Lorabeth, and the two of them broke into giggles.

Ellie got up and knelt in front of the chair where Lorabeth sat holding Madeline. “I couldn’t be happier.”

Careful of the baby, Lorabeth leaned into a hug with tears blurring her vision.

Ellie sat back on her heels. “He seemed so anxious. Are his fears justified?”

“Our mutual mammoth claw will insist that everything be proper and orderly in his sight.”

A look of concern passed Ellie’s features.

“Not to worry,” Lorabeth told her in a whisper. “I love him. We will be married with or without my father’s blessing.”

Her words didn’t seem to assure Ellie if her eyes were any indication, but she managed a smile and patted Lorabeth’s hand. “Good for you.”

“Do you know what the Bible says about husbands and wives?” Ambrose asked Ben.

Ben was glad he’d studied those parts. “I do, sir. It says that a husband should love his wife the way Christ loved the church.”

“Do you know what that entails, son?”

Ben had given it a good measure of thought. “I reckon it means that a man should love his wife enough to die for her.”

A beat of silence passed between them.

“And is that how you love my daughter, Benjamin?”

“Yes. I’d give my life for her, sir.”

“She is unspoiled,” the reverend said. “I trained her up in the way she should go. She believes I am a harsh taskmaster, but I raised my daughters to be good wives and God-fearing women.”

Ben should have taken off his coat. The room was sweltering. “You are a good father.”

“I have prayed for her to have wisdom in all things.”

Benjamin waited, perspiration prickling under his starched collar.

“I prayed for her husband to be a man of faith, a disciplined man. A good man.”

Benjamin met his eyes, surprised in that instant to find them the same golden-brown color as Lorabeth’s.

“Are you that man?”

Ben’s heart chugged to a stop and then started again. He thought over Lorabeth’s options. He knew exactly what bad men were like, and he’d disciplined himself to be the best man he could be.

“I’m not perfect, sir, but I believe I can be that man.”

“I believe you can, as well,” the reverend agreed.

Ben absorbed those words slowly.

“She will remain untouched until your wedding night. Becoming one flesh is a solemn and holy occasion.”

Ben’s head buzzed. “Of course.”

“You will honor her and value her above rubies…and kitchen ranges.”

The man’s expression hadn’t changed, so that hadn’t been a jest. “Of course.”

Ambrose wasn’t a man who minced words. “You have my blessing.”

Ben jerked out of the chair and extended his hand. “Thank you, sir! Thank you.”

The reverend shook Ben’s hand and then pulled his own back when Ben clung too long. “You will set a close date for the wedding. Paul said it is better for a man to marry than to burn.”

Ben would have to think on that one some. “Soon,” he agreed.

“Let us return then.”

“Yes, sir.” Ben led him toward the front door.

As relieved as he was with the reverend’s faith in him, doubt still crowded in. He couldn’t fail this man who’d placed his trust in him. And he couldn’t fail Lorabeth.

But his prevailing doubt remained. He’d taken a man’s life. He’d been justified, vindicated in the eyes of the law. Ben never let that demon out and he couldn’t now. Not when the stakes were so high. He couldn’t afford to give himself qualms. His measure was yet to be proven.

The sound of footsteps on the front porch alerted Lorabeth and Ellie that Ben was back. With a smile, Ellie took Madeline from Lorabeth’s lap. “Not that I don’t trust you…”

Lorabeth ignored her jest and watched the doorway. Frozen in place, she waited.

Caleb appeared first, and her heart sank. The boys all clambered in next and took seats around the room. Simon settled beside Flynn on the floor. Where was Benjamin?

Her father appeared next, his face as inscrutable as ever. Her heart pounded in anticipation anyway.

Benjamin entered. And he was wearing a smile!

“I asked everyone to come on in,” he said.

Ellie slipped her hand into Lorabeth’s and gave it a squeeze.

“I have a piece of news,” Benjamin said.

Lorabeth remained on her chair, unmoving.

“The reverend has given his blessing, and Lorabeth has agreed to marry me.”

For one split second, deafening silence encased the room. And then chaos broke loose. Lorabeth jumped up and ran toward Benjamin. He met her halfway and she wrapped her arms around his neck. He cupped her head in his palm and looked into her eyes. She could hardly see him through the blur of tears.

Ellie ran up and crushed them both in a hug. Madeline, somewhere in the middle, broke into a whimper that led to a full-blown howl. Caleb came and took the baby while Lorabeth backed away and let Ellie embrace her brother.

Lorabeth turned and crossed to her father who was standing behind one of the settees. She laid her hand on his arm. “Thank you, Father.”

“You and God are the ones who made the good choice,” he replied.

The Chaneys had all flocked around Benjamin and now turned to envelop Lorabeth in their hugs. Over Flynn’s shoulder, she spotted Simon on his knees before the hearth, a look of wonder on his face. She gave David a last hug and went to her brother. “Happy for me?”

He stood to his height several inches above her. “It’s like you said, Lorabeth.” Awe tinged his voice. “And you will be one of them.”

“I’ll always be your sister, and I’ll always be here for you.”

“You didn’t need to say that. I know you.”

They embraced, and Lorabeth was glad she and Simon weren’t as standoffish with each other as her father had always been with them.

She turned to find Benjamin watching her, waiting for her, and her heart leaped. “You’ll have a new brother,” she told Simon.

“Will you have Sunday dinners at your house?” Simon asked.

“I hadn’t given it any thought. Why?”

“Because if you do, I might get to play horseshoes again.”

She laughed. “You can count on it.”

She hurried to Benjamin, and he took her hand. Her heart was so full, she didn’t know how much more joy it could hold. All of her dreams were coming true.

T
hey set the wedding date for three weeks away. Plenty of time to make arrangements, Ellie had assured Lorabeth. Plenty of time to make a gown and address invitations and plan the menu.

Lorabeth went from euphoria to nervous exhaustion and back several times a day in the weeks that followed, and it became even more difficult to sleep.

Benjamin arrived one afternoon, scolding Buddy Lee back out the kitchen door when the cat tried to get in around his feet.

Lorabeth had been stirring together a recipe of rice pudding to set in the oven for that night’s supper. “Benjamin!”

She wiped her hands on her apron and hurried to greet him. Smiling, he gave her a brief hug and a chaste kiss.

He looked around and discovered they were alone. “I couldn’t sleep last night.”

“Me, neither. But then I never sleep much.”

“You don’t?”

“No. What were you thinking?”

“There’s so much we haven’t talked about. I think we need to spend a little more time together.” He didn’t remove his coat.

“We haven’t made the final arrangements yet,” she answered. “I have a list.”

“Let’s go somewhere and talk,” he said. “I want to surprise you today.”

“Well…”

Ellie came into the kitchen. “Go. Take her. She needs a free afternoon.”

Lorabeth didn’t waste any time removing her apron. “I’ll change and be right back.”

“Wear something nice,” he suggested.

Ben watched her hurry from the room.

“Are you hungry?” Ellie asked. “There are a few pieces of chicken left from last night.”

He shook his head. “I want to take her to supper. Can you manage without her?”

“I’m going to have to learn, aren’t I?”

He looked at her. “What do you mean?”

“I doubt she’ll want to stay as many hours a day as she does now after you’re married.”

“Probably not.” He said what he’d been thinking. “She doesn’t have to work at all if she doesn’t want to.”

“I’m not going to scold you for stealing away my help,” she said with a smile. “It will work out.”

A few minutes later Lorabeth returned wearing a dark green dress and carrying her new coat. “I’m ready.”

“Ellie and I were talkin’,” he said as he helped her into it. “After we’re married you won’t have to work unless you want to. But if you’d like to spend a few hours a day or a few days a week helpin’ Ellie, it will be all right with both of us. We want you to do what pleases you.”

“I…I can’t imagine not being here,” she said, a furrow between her brows. “But of course I’ll have another house to keep, won’t I?”

“We’ll work it out,” he assured her.

“’Bye, Ellie,” Lorabeth said with a little wave. Ben led her out of doors where his buggy waited. “Where are we going?”

“I thought we’d browse a few of the shops this afternoon, then have dinner together.”

“Not come home, you mean?”

“That’s right. I want to take you to the Arcade Hotel’s dining hall. Ever been there?”

She shook her head. “Where Ellie and Sophie used to work? Does Ellie know?”

“I told her.”

“What a treat this will be!”

The first place he took her was Miss Tibby’s Tea Parlor. He’d never been there himself, but he knew the ladies liked it. Ben felt completely out of place as they sat at a table with white linen and ate tiny frosted tea cakes and sipped from delicate china cups, but he wanted Lorabeth to have all the experiences she’d longed for.

“We’ll live in my house in town, of course,” he said. “I’ll ride out every day to work at the other place.”

Her smile displayed her pleasure. “It’s a beautiful home. I can’t believe I’m so blessed.”

“I want to talk about some new pieces of furniture,” he told her.

After tea, they strolled the boardwalks along Main Street and Broadway, browsing in clothing stores and a tailor’s.

Eventually they reached the mercantile. The crowded store was bustling with activity. Dirk Paulson was gathering supplies for a dusty cowboy, and Tubs McElroy, the bartender from the Side-Track, was looking at boxes of cigars. Two women were comparing colors of cloth and thread while three small children clung to their skirts.

One of the women glanced up and recognized him. “Dr. Ben! How unusual to see you in town of an afternoon.”

“Hi, Mrs. Henley.”

The woman admonished one of the toddlers to wait for her and walked toward them, her curious gaze flitting to Lorabeth.

“Have you met Lorabeth Holdridge? Her father is the Congregational preacher.”

“Hello, dear.”

“Pleased to meet you,” Lorabeth said.

“Lorabeth and I are to be married in two weeks.”

The other woman overheard and joined them to ooh and aah. Lorabeth’s blush was so pretty that it made Ben’s chest ache.

Eventually the women went back to their shopping and Ben showed Lorabeth the catalogs. “What kind of rugs and curtains would you like in our rooms?”

“I’m sure what you already have is serviceable,” she replied.

“But we should have new for our new life together.”

Her eyes shone with interest and surprise. “All right, then. Let’s look.”

They scoured the pages for colors and fabrics and selected rugs for the parlor and bedroom. They ordered bolts of fabric for curtains to coordinate.

“How long will these take?” Ben asked Hazel Paulson who ran the store.

“They come from the factories by rail and usually don’t take no more’n a week or two,” she replied.

“Is there someone who can come measure windows and make the drapes for us?”

“You’re in luck. My daughter Beverly is the best drapery maker in town. Her place is ’round the corner.”

“There’s been nothing in that front hall since I’ve had the house,” he thought aloud to Lorabeth. “Let’s choose a hall rack. Maybe one with a mirror.”

Instead of a huge piece, they both liked a golden oak hall seat with storage inside and a separate matching mirror with hooks for coats and hats.

“Our first purchase,” he told her with satisfaction. “Now. Let’s select a bedroom suite.”

“Benjamin, is that a wise expense? Don’t you have a bed and chests of drawers?”

“All hand-me-downs,” he replied. “Not good enough for our new life. Let’s see how expensive they are.” He flipped through the pages of a catalog, past tables and desks and bookcases until he found iron bed frames and on the next page found sets. “Look at this one,” he said, pointing to the full-page depiction entitled, High-Grade Bedroom Suite with Ornate Hand Carvings.

“I don’t even think I could sleep in a bed that costs that much,” she whispered.

“It’s not that much,” he told her. “I earn that from nearly every rancher in the spring when I do inoculations and exams.”

Her eyes widened in surprise. “You’re rich?”

“I guess to some people I’m rich.
We’re
rich,” he corrected. His ability to afford a home and all they needed was a far cry from his humble beginnings. “How about this one, then? See here, it says exceptional value.”

“Three hundred and ten pounds,” she read over his shoulder. “How much will it cost to ship?”

He turned to look at her.

She gave him a hesitant smile. “A good wife is frugal.”

“I’m thankful that you’ll be lookin’ after our household, then. You’ll do a good job. Isn’t frugal also buyin’ good quality and makin’ the best deal possible? We’re not spendin’ money foolishly here. I want to provide these things, Lorabeth. It’s why I worked hard in school and sacrificed to start my business. So I never had to be poor.”

“In that case,” she said, “I’ve always admired Ellie’s armoire.”

Ben smiled. “Well then, that’ll be my wedding gift to you.”

They were among the early diners at the Arcade that evening. The wood-paneled walls, elegant chandeliers and white linens caught Lorabeth’s attention immediately. Gleaming silver coffee urns lined one wall, and girls in immaculate black dresses and crisp white aprons bustled about with trays.

A man in a black suit led the way to a table, and one of the girls handed them menus. The table was set with sweating glasses of ice water and pressed napkins. Lorabeth studied the menu in awe. She had no idea what a blue point was, but it came served on a shell. She read the list: filets of whitefish with madeira sauce; young capon; roast sirloin of beef au jus; pork with applesauce; stuffed turkey; salmi of duck; prairie chicken with currant jelly; sugar-cured ham; pickled lamb’s tongue; and lobster salad au mayonnaise.

She raised her gaze to Benjamin’s. “They have all this food ready to bring us?”

He nodded. “Pretty incredible, isn’t it?”

“Where do they get all this?”

“Fred Harvey pays his chefs more than anyone else in his employ. I hear some of ’em are from France. Food arrives fresh every day by train.”

“Have you ever eaten lobster?” she asked.

He nodded. “Had it once when Caleb brought us here for Ellie’s birthday.”

“Pickled lamb’s tongue?”

He shook his head and grimaced.

“So the fish is fresh from the coast? That’s what I’m having. I’ve only eaten catfish and trout.”

The waitress took their orders and brought them coffee. After she’d moved to another table, Lorabeth said, “Everything is so elegant. It’s all just perfect.”

“All the Harvey Houses along the Sante Fe are set up the same. All staffed with attractive young woman like these.”

“You’ve eaten in more than one?”

He nodded. “A couple along the railroad. One right in Florence.”

“Sometimes I think I’m going to wake up and all this will have been a dream.” She folded her hands on the edge of the table. “It’s almost too good to be true.
You’re
almost too good to be true.”

“I’m not that special,” he answered.

“You are to me.”

“I find
that
too good to be true.” He winked.

She smiled, and he placed his hand on top of hers.

Movement caught his eye and he noticed the waiter leading a family to a table on the other side of the room. He immediately recognized the man’s hair and wide shoulders. All the heartwarming confidence the afternoon had generated evaporated as the Evans family took seats around a table.

Ben looked away sharply. He tried to push Wesley Evans out of his thoughts so he could get on with his life, but fate kept throwing the man and
his whole stinkin’ family
in his face.

Part of the rage he’d directed toward the world for so much of his younger days surfaced, and being so angry scared the hell out of him. Men were capable of terrible things when they were angry or drunk, and Ben never got drunk.

He studied Lorabeth’s serene countenance as she admired their surroundings. The same peace she possessed was his desire. She was perfect for him in so many ways. He relaxed somewhat just looking at her. Her calming influence would always be a balm to his spirit.

Tell her. Get it out. Secrets are destructive and you’ll lose her trust.
The voice in his head wouldn’t be silenced, and the clincher was, Ben knew his conscience was right.

The waitress served their food. Lorabeth tasted her fish and her lashes drifted down over her incredible eyes. She opened them and Ben read her delight. “I’ve never tasted anything like this,” she said.

Ben cut a slice of his ham. He had to tell her about Evans. He’d told her father, thinking
that
had been the most difficult thing he’d ever done. This would be worse. This woman he held in such high esteem would know his sordid secrets.

He worked at making the most of their meal time together, refusing to look over and be tortured by Wes Evans eating with his perfect little family.

The waitress offered them dessert, and Ben was hoping to leave, but Lorabeth’s eyes lit up at the mention of cheesecake. He realized in that moment that it was a good thing she was an unselfish and sensible woman, because he doubted he’d ever be able to say no to her.

Once it arrived, she offered him a bite, and he leaned to accept the morsel from her fork. She gave him a bashful smile and a flush rose in her cheeks.

Ben made up his mind not to be run off, and they sipped coffee until Lorabeth was ready to leave.

He paid, leaving the waitress a generous tip, and helped Lorabeth into her coat.

“I need to talk to you,” he said as they left the Arcade.

“What about?”

He stopped and turned to her. The wind had picked up since that afternoon and a brisk chill swept around their ankles. “Somewhere where we’ll be alone.”

He led her to where they’d left the buggy, and drove to his house. Once inside, they hung their wraps, and Ben laid a fire. He stoked the range and pumped water for coffee. “I made a fool of myself showin’ your father the house,” he told her.

Lorabeth wandered the room as though taking better note of the layout. “You couldn’t have made too big a fool of yourself. He approved of you.”

“He liked the range.”

She cut him a glance.

“It’s your kitchen now,” he told her.

“I’m going to love everything about it. About the whole house, and…” She paused in her inspection of the room to study him. “I’m going to love everything about being your wife.”

At those words new heat burst to life in Ben’s body. He busied himself getting down mugs.

Lorabeth seated herself on one of the benches that flanked the long table. “What did you want to talk about?”

He didn’t like his reactions. His childhood made him feel inadequate, and letting her see the inadequacy made him vulnerable. He didn’t want to tell her, didn’t want to be less in her eyes.

He had to.

“Ellie and I don’t talk much about where we came from,” he began. “How we grew up.”

“I noticed.”

“Some things are too painful to talk about.”

Her lovely eyes held understanding. “Are you sure you want to now?”

He nodded, then shook his head. “No. I don’t want to. But I have to. I have to tell you this so that it’s not between us.”

Lorabeth was curious about the past and the family that Ellie and Benjamin had been evasive about. She would never have pried, but she was interested.

Benjamin didn’t meet her eyes as he told her the circumstances of his birth, how he and Ellie and Flynn didn’t know who their fathers were because their mother had been a prostitute.