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Authors: Jerry Bridges
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THE DISCIPLINE OF CHOICES
The third of the five essential elements of holiness is the discipline of daily choices. We have already looked in chapter 5 at the serious consequences of our daily choices; over time we become what we do. To experience the holiness God calls us to, we must learn to make the right choice in the face of each specific temptation. Paul said the grace of God “teaches us to say ‘No’ to ungodliness and worldly passions” (Titus 2:11-12). Although he was probably referring to an overall attitude toward sin, and thus to renounce it as a way of life, I find it helpful to take the same attitude toward specific occurrences of temptation. I even go so far as to verbalize (softly or to myself) a firm
no,
at the same time breathing a prayer for the aid of the Holy Spirit to carry through with that choice.
no,
at the same time breathing a prayer for the aid of the Holy Spirit to carry through with that choice.
In Romans 8:13, Paul tells us to put to death the misdeeds of the body. We do this by the choices we make—not only to say no to temptations, but also to say yes to the positive steps we must take to pursue holiness. We must exercise ourselves in the disciplines of choosing to feed upon the Scriptures so that our convictions will conform more and more to God’s will for us, of choosing to pray constantly for His enabling grace to say no to temptation, of choosing to take all practical steps to avoid known areas of temptation and flee from those that surprise us. These are some of the practical steps we must take to discipline ourselves in holiness. We can easily see that this discipline involves nothing less than an
all-out
effort to turn from every sin and to do the will of God in every area of our lives.
all-out
effort to turn from every sin and to do the will of God in every area of our lives.
DEPENDENCE ON THE SPIRIT
Any time we stress the personal responsibility of practical actions, however, we are in danger of thinking that the pursuit of holiness does depend upon our own willpower, our own strength of character. Nothing is further from the truth. We are both
personally responsible and totally dependent
in our practice of godliness. We cannot change our hearts; that is the exclusive work of the Holy Spirit. But we can and must avail ourselves of the means He uses.
personally responsible and totally dependent
in our practice of godliness. We cannot change our hearts; that is the exclusive work of the Holy Spirit. But we can and must avail ourselves of the means He uses.
In Romans 12:2, we are told to be
transformed
by the renewing of our minds. The word
transformed
means “to be changed within.” John Murray says, “The term used here implies that we are to be constantly in the process of being metamorphosed by renewal of that which is the seat of thought and understanding.”
3
It is nothing less than a total renovation of our values and desires. This renewal is the exclusive work of the Holy Spirit. Through His ministry we are transformed more and more into the likeness of our Lord. Conceivably, even an unsaved person can change certain actions, but only the Holy Spirit can transform us within; only He can give us new values and desires.
transformed
by the renewing of our minds. The word
transformed
means “to be changed within.” John Murray says, “The term used here implies that we are to be constantly in the process of being metamorphosed by renewal of that which is the seat of thought and understanding.”
3
It is nothing less than a total renovation of our values and desires. This renewal is the exclusive work of the Holy Spirit. Through His ministry we are transformed more and more into the likeness of our Lord. Conceivably, even an unsaved person can change certain actions, but only the Holy Spirit can transform us within; only He can give us new values and desires.
Again the godly writer of Psalm 119 recognizes this dependence upon the Spirit to change his inward thoughts and desires. He prays, “Turn my heart toward your statutes and not toward selfish gain. Turn my eyes away from worthless things; renew my life according to your word” (verses 36-37). This same man who elsewhere in this psalm expresses so strongly his sense of personal responsibility here acknowledges his total dependence upon God for the work of inner transformation. Paul said he had
learned
to be content in every situation. There was no doubt he felt responsible for this changed attitude toward varying circumstances. But he was just as clear that he was totally dependent upon the Holy Spirit working within him to accomplish such a change (Philippians 4:11-13).
learned
to be content in every situation. There was no doubt he felt responsible for this changed attitude toward varying circumstances. But he was just as clear that he was totally dependent upon the Holy Spirit working within him to accomplish such a change (Philippians 4:11-13).
This principle of simultaneous personal responsibility and total dependence upon God for fulfillment is one of the most important principles in the practice of godliness. We will not make progress in godliness without consistent application of this principle in our lives.
A GOD-CENTERED DESIRE
The fifth essential element in the pursuit of holiness is the development of a
God-centered desire
for holiness. We have already considered in chapter 5 the necessity of a Godward motivation in the development of all the graces of Christian character. The need for such a Godward motivation, however, is especially critical in the pursuit of holiness—the putting off of the sinful traits of the old self. We want victory in our lives, whether it is in a Ping-Pong game or in our struggle with sin. We want to feel good about ourselves, and we know we will not as long as we are allowing some sin to gain mastery over us.
God-centered desire
for holiness. We have already considered in chapter 5 the necessity of a Godward motivation in the development of all the graces of Christian character. The need for such a Godward motivation, however, is especially critical in the pursuit of holiness—the putting off of the sinful traits of the old self. We want victory in our lives, whether it is in a Ping-Pong game or in our struggle with sin. We want to feel good about ourselves, and we know we will not as long as we are allowing some sin to gain mastery over us.
To paraphrase a writer from a previous century, so often when we sin we are more vexed at the lowering of our self-esteem than we are grieved at God’s dishonor. We are irritated at our lack of self-control in subjecting ourselves to some unworthy habit. We are unable to stand the disappointment of seeing ourselves fail.
God does not honor these self-centered desires. This is one reason we do not experience more of His enabling power in our day-to-day struggles with so-called besetting sins. God does not give us His power so that we might feel good about ourselves; He gives us His power so that we can obey Him for His sake, for His glory. It is not wrong to feel good about ourselves, but this should be a byproduct of obedience which is motivated by a desire to please God.
We have learned in earlier chapters that godliness is first of all God-centeredness. This concept is extremely important in the area of holiness. Our desire for holiness, our motivation to pursue it, must be a God-centered desire and motivation. Developing this God-centered motivation requires practice or training; it does not come naturally or easily. We are by nature self-centered. If we are diligent to examine ourselves, we will often find that our motivation is self-centered. We must confess and renounce this, just as we must any disobedient action, and then seek a God-centered motivation.
NOTES
1
Howard Marshall, “The Epistles of John,” The New
International Commentary on the New Testament
(Grand Rapids, Mich.: Eerdmans, 1978), page 109.
Howard Marshall, “The Epistles of John,” The New
International Commentary on the New Testament
(Grand Rapids, Mich.: Eerdmans, 1978), page 109.
2
These five essentials, as well as other aspects of holiness, are more fully developed in
The Pursuit of Holiness
(NavPress, 1978). This book may be obtained from most local Christian bookstores or by contacting NavPress at P.O. Box 35002, Colorado Springs, CO 80935.
These five essentials, as well as other aspects of holiness, are more fully developed in
The Pursuit of Holiness
(NavPress, 1978). This book may be obtained from most local Christian bookstores or by contacting NavPress at P.O. Box 35002, Colorado Springs, CO 80935.
3
John Murray, “The Epistles of Romans,”
The New International Commentary on the New Testament,
Vol. II (Grand Rapids, Mich.: Eerdmans, 1965), page 114.
John Murray, “The Epistles of Romans,”
The New International Commentary on the New Testament,
Vol. II (Grand Rapids, Mich.: Eerdmans, 1965), page 114.
11
Self-Control
Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control.
Proverbs 25:28
In ancient times the walls of a city were its main defense; without them the city was easy prey to its enemies. To godly Nehemiah, a Jewish captive in the faraway city of Susa, the news that the wall of Jerusalem was broken down signified the ultimate destruction of his beloved city. When he heard the news he sat down and wept.
Self-control is the believer’s wall of defense against the sinful desires that wage war against his soul. Charles Bridges has observed that the person without self-control is easy prey to the invader: “He yields himself to the first assault of his ungoverned passions, offering no resistance.... Having no discipline over himself, temptation becomes the occasion of sin, and hurries him on to fearful lengths that he had not contemplated.... Anger tends to murder. Unwatchfulness over lust plunges into adultery.”
1
1
Self-control is control
of
one’s self. It is probably best defined as
the governing of one’s desires.
D. G. Kehl describes it as “the ability to avoid excesses, to stay within reasonable bounds.”
2
Bethune calls it “the healthful regulation of our desires and appetites, preventing their excess.”
3
Both of these descriptions imply what we all know to be true; we have a tendency to overindulge our various appetites and consequently need to restrain them.
of
one’s self. It is probably best defined as
the governing of one’s desires.
D. G. Kehl describes it as “the ability to avoid excesses, to stay within reasonable bounds.”
2
Bethune calls it “the healthful regulation of our desires and appetites, preventing their excess.”
3
Both of these descriptions imply what we all know to be true; we have a tendency to overindulge our various appetites and consequently need to restrain them.
But self-control involves a much wider range of watchfulness than merely control of our bodily appetites and desires. We also must exercise self-control of thoughts, emotions, and speech. There is a form of self-control that says
yes
to what we should do as well as that which says
no
to what we shouldn’t do. For example, I seldom
want
to study the Bible when I first begin a study. There are too many other things that are mentally much easier to do, such as reading the newspaper, a magazine, or a good Christian book. A necessary expression of self-control, then, is to set myself down at the dining room table with Bible and notebook in hand and say to myself, “Get with it!” This may not sound very spiritual, but neither does Paul’s exclamation, “I beat my body and make it my slave” (1 Corinthians 9:27).
yes
to what we should do as well as that which says
no
to what we shouldn’t do. For example, I seldom
want
to study the Bible when I first begin a study. There are too many other things that are mentally much easier to do, such as reading the newspaper, a magazine, or a good Christian book. A necessary expression of self-control, then, is to set myself down at the dining room table with Bible and notebook in hand and say to myself, “Get with it!” This may not sound very spiritual, but neither does Paul’s exclamation, “I beat my body and make it my slave” (1 Corinthians 9:27).
Self-control is necessary because we are at war with our own sinful desires. James describes those desires as dragging us away and enticing us into sin (1:14). Peter says they war against our souls (1 Peter 2:11). Paul speaks of them as deceitful (Ephesians 4:22). What makes these sinful desires so dangerous is that they dwell within our own heart. External temptations would not be nearly so dangerous were it not for the fact that they find this ally of desire right within our own breast.
Self-control is an essential character trait of the godly person that enables him to obey the words of the Lord Jesus, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me” (Luke 9:23). It is impossible to be a follower of Jesus without giving diligent attention in our lives to the grace of self-control.
The translators of the
New International Version
of the Bible have used the expression
self-control
to translate two different words from the original language. The first word, which is used by Paul in his list called the fruit of the Spirit, refers primarily to moderation or temperance in the gratification of our desires and appetites. A friend of mine who is a former teacher of Greek says it has the literal meaning of “inner strength,” and refers to that strength of character that enables one to control his passions and desires.
New International Version
of the Bible have used the expression
self-control
to translate two different words from the original language. The first word, which is used by Paul in his list called the fruit of the Spirit, refers primarily to moderation or temperance in the gratification of our desires and appetites. A friend of mine who is a former teacher of Greek says it has the literal meaning of “inner strength,” and refers to that strength of character that enables one to control his passions and desires.
The second word rendered
self-control
by the
New International Version
translators is a word that denotes soundness of mind or sound judgment. It is rendered
sober
or
sensible
by other translations. This word conveys the idea of allowing sound judgment to control our desires and appetites, our thoughts, emotions, and actions.
self-control
by the
New International Version
translators is a word that denotes soundness of mind or sound judgment. It is rendered
sober
or
sensible
by other translations. This word conveys the idea of allowing sound judgment to control our desires and appetites, our thoughts, emotions, and actions.
We can readily see that these two ideas complement one another in the biblical meaning of self-control. Sound judgment enables us to determine what we should do and how we should respond; inner strength provides the will to do it. Both sound judgment and inner strength are thus necessary for Spirit-directed self-control.
Sound judgment is critical to the exercise of self-control. It enables the godly person not only to distinguish good from evil, but also to sort out the good and the best. Sound judgment enables us to determine the boundaries of moderation in our appetites, desires, and habits. Sound judgment helps us regulate our thoughts and keep our emotions under control.
But sound judgment alone is not enough to enable us to practice self-control. Inner strength is also essential. All too often we know very well
what
to do, but we do not do it. We allow feelings or desires to overrule our judgment.
what
to do, but we do not do it. We allow feelings or desires to overrule our judgment.
Ultimately,
Self-control is the exercise of inner strength under the direction of sound judgment that enables us to do, think, and say the things that are pleasing to God.
Self-control is the exercise of inner strength under the direction of sound judgment that enables us to do, think, and say the things that are pleasing to God.
Since the grace of self-control affects so many aspects of our lives, it is helpful to focus our study of it in three major areas:
body, thoughts,
and
emotions.
body, thoughts,
and
emotions.
HONOR GOD WITH YOUR BODY
“And the Lord God made all kinds of trees grow out of the ground—trees that were pleasing to the eye and good for food” (Genesis 2:9). God created man to enjoy sensuous pleasures; that is, things that are pleasant to our senses and bodily appetites. The trees of His creation were not only good for food, but also pleasant to the eyes. There is no doubt that God intends that we enjoy the physical things of this life which He has so graciously provided. As Paul says in 1 Timothy 6:17, “God ... richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment.”
But man in his sin has corrupted all of the natural blessings which God has given. Because our desires have been corrupted, those things which God intended for our use and enjoyment have a tendency to become our masters. Paul had to warn the Corinthian believers against this tendency when he said, “‘Everything is permissible for me’—but I will not be mastered by anything” (1 Corinthians 6:12). The moderation resulting from self-control keeps permissible things from becoming masters of our bodies.
In the rather short letter in which Paul instructs Titus in his pastoral duties among the Cretan Christians, Paul frequently refers to the grace of self-control. It is a requirement for elders, it is important for older men, younger men, older women and younger women; it is in fact to be a characteristic of all believers. Why did Paul so stress this trait of self-control? Because the Cretans were “always liars, evil brutes, lazy gluttons” (1:12). They were demonstrably in need of the grace of self-control. Someone characterized as a lazy glutton certainly needs to learn self-control of the body.
Self-control of the body should be aimed primarily at three areas of physical temptation: gluttony (in both food and drink), laziness, and sexual immorality or impurity. Although drunkenness is a widespread sin in the nonChristian culture of today, I do not detect that it is a major problem among Christians. But gluttony surely is. Most of us have a tendency to overindulge in the food which God has so graciously provided for us. We allow the sensual part of our God-given appetite to range out of control and lead us into sin. We need to remember that even our eating and drinking is to be done to the glory of God (1 Corinthians 10:31).
What about laziness? Most of us would no doubt assent to the widespread need for self-control with respect to food and drink among Christians today. But laziness? I suspect we don’t particularly think of ourselves collectively as a lazy people like those Cretan Christians. We work hard at our jobs, keep our houses painted and our lawns trimmed. Can we have a problem with laziness?
To answer that question, let’s look at an incident in the life of Jesus. Mark records that “Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed” (1:35). That Jesus got up to pray while it was still dark is challenging enough. But note what had happened the night before. Mark tells us that on the previous evening after sunset the people brought to Jesus all the sick and demon-possessed to be healed; the whole town, in fact, gathered at the door (verses 32-34). Jesus was probably quite weary at the end of that evening.
Now you and I, under those circumstances, would have tended to sleep in the following morning, feeling that after such a full evening of ministry we deserved a rest and a little pampering. But not Jesus. He knew the importance of getting that time of fellowship with His Father, and He disciplined His physical body in order to do it.
I suspect that the number of Christians who have a consistent, productive time of fellowship with God each day is a very small minority. For some, such a time is nonexistent; for others, it is sporadic at best. This is because we tend to be lazy in body and undisciplined in the use of our time.
There are other Christians who have learned the self-control of getting up in the morning to have fellowship with God, but who haven’t learned the self-control of caring for their bodies. Some are abusing their bodies through a constant lack of needed rest and recreation; others are allowing their bodies to become soft and flabby through no exercise at all. Both groups need to learn godly self-control of their bodies.
Sexual self-control belongs to both the body and the mind. There was a time, a generation or so ago, when we would hardly have felt it necessary to exhort Christians to exercise self-control in the area of sexual immorality. Control of impure thoughts, yes; but even the more moral segment of nonChristian society condemned the actual physical acts of immorality. This situation no longer exists. Authorities in our social and psychological areas today are telling us that premarital or extramarital sexual activity is okay as long as it is not emotionally harmful.
Many Christians, unfortunately, are falling prey to such thinking. Immorality among both single and married people is becoming a major concern in the Christian community. The need for sexual self-control among Christians has probably never been greater since the rise of the first-century Gentile church out of gross paganism.
God’s standard for sexual self-control is
absolute abstinence
outside of the marriage relationship. If, as Kehl suggests, self-control is the ability to stay within reasonable bounds, then we must realize that God’s boundary for sexual activity is limited strictly to marriage. As Hebrews 13:4 says, “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.” Paul’s words to the Thessalonian believers also leave no room for compromise on this point: “It is God’s will that you should be holy; that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God” (1 Thessalonians 4:3-5).
absolute abstinence
outside of the marriage relationship. If, as Kehl suggests, self-control is the ability to stay within reasonable bounds, then we must realize that God’s boundary for sexual activity is limited strictly to marriage. As Hebrews 13:4 says, “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.” Paul’s words to the Thessalonian believers also leave no room for compromise on this point: “It is God’s will that you should be holy; that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God” (1 Thessalonians 4:3-5).
The Christian must exercise self-control not only in the area of sexual activity, but in the area of impure thoughts, lustful looks, and suggestive speech as well. Jesus said, “I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28). A lustful look quickly becomes an impure thought. If
acts
of immorality are becoming a problem among Christians, the
thoughts
of immorality are a much greater problem. Sexual lust lies latent in the heart of every Christian. Even righteous Job found it necessary to deal decisively with this temptation; he made a covenant with his eyes not to look lustfully at a girl (31:1). If Job found it necessary to make this kind of commitment in the day in which he lived, how much more do we need it in today’s society—where sexual lust is exploited even to advertise spark plugs!
acts
of immorality are becoming a problem among Christians, the
thoughts
of immorality are a much greater problem. Sexual lust lies latent in the heart of every Christian. Even righteous Job found it necessary to deal decisively with this temptation; he made a covenant with his eyes not to look lustfully at a girl (31:1). If Job found it necessary to make this kind of commitment in the day in which he lived, how much more do we need it in today’s society—where sexual lust is exploited even to advertise spark plugs!
The subject of control of our bodies, then, especially in the area of sexual purity, leads naturally to a second area of self-control: our thoughts.
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