Authors: Kristan Higgins
“What are you talking about?” Goggy demanded. “It’s wonderful.”
“You first, mate,” Tom said.
“Just take a little nibble, son,” Dad said. “You don’t have to eat the whole thing.”
“Someone has to,” Faith said. “Tom. Be a man.”
Charlie held up the bony fish. “Oh, God,” he said. Closed his eyes and took the smallest bite possible, just a scrape of the teeth, gagged and manfully forced it down his throat. “It’s...good,” he wheezed, tears coming to his eyes. “A little strong, maybe.”
“Good job!” Pops said, clapping him on the back. “Tom? Go ahead. Finish it up, son.”
Tom looked at Honor. She raised her eyebrows and smiled. “For you, my love,” he said, and, much to her horror, picked up the fish and bit it right in half, the bones crunching. His face contorted, and everyone laughed. He chewed, swallowed and then ate the other half. Dear Lord.
“Now
there
is a man,” Mrs. Johnson said approvingly.
“Good job, babe,” Honor said, taking the plate from him. Blick. The smell was wretched. Poor Tom. Time to get to the real food—the casseroles and ham and pies.
“Not so fast, darling.” Tom jerked her back to him. “How’s about a kiss?”
“No! Don’t you dare!” She broke away from him and ran behind Levi. “Officer, help me. That man has fish breath.”
“Far be it from me to come between a man and his wife,” Levi said, stepping away.
“We’re not married yet,” Honor shrieked, dodging and laughing as Tom chased her. She bolted for the nearest row of grapes. “And we won’t be if this keeps up. Daddy, help me!” Her traitorous father merely laughed.
“Go get her, Tom!” Pru called, and sure enough, he caught her arm and spun her around.
“Darling? Don’t you love me anymore?” he said, his sweet, crooked smile flashing.
Then he kissed her, herring breath and all.
And you know, it really wasn’t so bad. Her family gave a cheer, and Honor felt him smile. Then he kissed her again, and hugged her. “This is lovely,” he said, his face growing more serious. He tucked some hair behind her ear. “Thank you for having us.”
“Come get some real food, you two lovebirds,” Goggy sang. “Did I mention that I always knew they’d be perfect together?”
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
O
N
S
ATURDAY
,
T
OM
cornered Honor just after her shower. Little was more appealing than a woman wrapped in a towel, her skin damp and pink. Lose the towel, and life would be perfect.
But his unofficial stepson was waiting. “Want to come out with Charlie and me?” he asked.
“Sure,” she said, and he watched as a flush spread into her cheeks. “Where are we going?”
“It’s a surprise.”
They stopped at Lorelei’s and got sandwiches and iced tea from the sunny owner, then picked up the lad and headed north. Charlie was plugged into his phone, listening to music, but he wasn’t sullen, Tom thought. Just a teenager. He had Spike in the back with him; the dog reserved her animosity for Tom and seemed quite content to sprawl on Charlie’s leg in exchange for a belly rub.
The boy’s face was changing, Tom thought as he glanced in the rearview mirror. He’d lost the softness of a little kid, and his bone structure was becoming more pronounced. His freckles had faded, and his eyes were more observant.
He looked a lot like Melissa.
Someday, he and Honor might have a baby in the backseat there with Charlie and Spike. A car seat, a diaper bag, a knapsack, all that.
The image made his hands a little sweaty. But that was the deal, was it not?
Besides, he liked kids. He could handle a baby.
It was the family part that made him nervous. Perhaps not nervous in a bad way, though.
Speaking of family, he’d spoken to his father again this week. He should get Dad to move over here. Since he’d be staying and all.
“All right, darlings,” Tom said, pulling off the highway. “Three guesses as to where we’re going.”
“Brigham Airfield?” Charlie asked as they passed the sign.
“Genius,” Tom said. “Thought we’d take little project of mine out for a ride.” He turned onto the airport road, and ten minutes later, they were standing in front of the Piper.
“So what did you do to it?” Charlie asked.
“We put in a bigger engine, modified the wings, adjusted the rudders. The owner wants to do some stunt flying.”
“Cool.”
The plane looked quite cheery. Tom walked around, explaining the preflight check, the different parts of the plane, and much to his surprise, Charlie seemed to be listening—no headphones, no sullen staring. When he was done, Tom opened the door. “Charlie, mate, up here. You’re my copilot.”
“You have your pilot’s license?” Honor asked.
“I do. But I don’t fly too much, so hang on tight.” He winked at her, and she smiled, her dimples flashing.
In the cockpit, he showed Charlie which controls did what, checked the switches, valves and the rest of it, then radioed the tower and started the engines.
It was a bumpy ascent, though not too bad. Everything felt worse in a little plane, of course, and Charlie was a bit pale. But once they’d gotten level, the kid was glued to the view.
“This is awesome,” he said.
Below them spread the soft green hills of western New York, the lush fields and red barns, thick forests and the occasional white steeple. The sky was utterly clear today.
“What happens if a Canada goose flies into an engine?” Charlie asked.
“We pray,” Tom said.
“Do you ever watch those airplane disaster movies?”
“As a matter of fact, no.”
“There was this awesome flick last year,” the kid said, then launched into a rather disturbing description of the plot. Tom glanced at Honor. She was smiling.
Something moved in Tom’s chest.
“All right, Charles, you ready to fly this little darling?” Tom said. “All you have to do is keep a steady hand here, right? Nice and level, hands at ten and two, just like in a car.”
“I don’t drive,” Charlie said, his voice a little panicky.
“I’m right here,” Tom assured him. “You can do it, mate. And if you like it, we’ll get you a pilot’s license. You can fly before you can drive. Ready? The controls are yours.”
Granted, he wasn’t about to let Charlie do anything stupid or risky; the kid had a lot less control than he knew, but the expression on his face was priceless. Somber, focused, and then, miraculously, he flashed Tom a smile. “Am I doing okay?”
“You’re brilliant, mate.”
Tom took the controls back after ten minutes or so, then circled the plane out so they could see Lake Canandaigua, the nearest of the Finger Lakes. The water was cobalt blue this morning. “That’s where we’ll have a picnic,” Tom said, pointing to a field below.
“Are we gonna land on the water?” Charlie asked.
“No, no. This isn’t a water plane. The engine’s too heavy. But they do have amphibious planes that land on both, right, Honor?”
“Absolutely,” she said. “There’s a fantastic water plane show in June on Keuka. We’ll have to go.”
A short time later, they were back on land, in the field Tom had shown them from the air. The lake shimmered, and birds wheeled and sang. They ate their picnic lunch, the sun warm.
If someone had told Tom two months ago that he’d be on a picnic with his fiancée and Charlie, and that Charlie would be speaking to him, Tom wouldn’t have believed it. A night like the sowing ceremony, the solidarity of the Hollands, the history and closeness, the welcome for him and Charlie...Tom wondered what he’d done to deserve it.
Charlie was lying on his back, and Tom did the same. Honor, too. A few fat clouds drifted by; Honor murmured that there’d be rain by tonight, and she should know. There wasn’t much she didn’t.
He looked at her, her short blond hair ruffling in the breeze. She’d been quiet today, popping in with a comment here or there, but mostly watching the two of them, as if understanding that this was a momentous day.
Today, the old Charlie was back. Well, not really. There was no going back, Tom knew that. He knew that Melissa’s death had changed her son irreversibly. But the boy Tom had always imagined he’d be—smart, friendly, focused, decent—that kid had shown up today, even without Abby to impress.
A lot of that had to do with Honor.
In all this time, she hadn’t once complained about Charlie’s manners, sullenness, stomping, refusal to eat, slamming of doors. She never rolled her eyes, never expressed anything other than pleasure when he came over, never sighed or muttered. She’d given him a family, a friend in Abby. She even seemed to like him.
Tom reached out and took Honor’s hand. Kissed it, and watched as her eyes grew soft.
Two hours later, after one of the best days of Tom’s life, he dropped Honor off, kissed her briefly on the mouth and said he’d be back in fifteen minutes or so. “She’s nice,” Charlie said as they pulled away.
“Yes,” Tom said. He glanced at the boy. “Feel like being my best man?”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah.”
Charlie shrugged. “Okay.”
It was enough. It was more than enough.
Tom pulled up to the Kelloggs’ house.
A dark blue, vintage Mustang was out front, and for one second, he felt like he’d just been hit with a particularly brutal uppercut, right under the chin.
Charlie was out of the car in a blur. “Dad!” he yelled. “Hey, Dad!”
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
M
ITCHELL
D
E
L
UCA
GOT
out of his car in an unhurried manner, smiling as Charlie ran into his arms. Tousled the boy’s hair and glanced at Tom.
Tom got out, his heart thudding sickly against his ribs. Stuffed his hands in his pockets and walked over. “Hello.”
“Hey. Mitch DeLuca, Charlie’s father. Nice to meet you.” He offered his hand.
“We’ve met,” Tom said.
“Oh, yeah?”
Nope, he was sincere. “I was engaged to Melissa.”
Charlie looked between the two of them. “It’s Tom, Dad. Tom Barlow.”
“Right! Dude, sorry. Good to see you again.” Mitchell gave Tom a baffled look—
So why exactly are you here?
Then he turned to his boy, and the resemblance between them was a little shocking. Yes, Charlie looked like his mum...but he looked a lot like his father, too.
“How are you, son? It’s been a while, hasn’t it? You’re getting to be as tall as me.”
Charlie smiled proudly, and Tom felt it like a knife to the chest. It had taken two entire years for Charlie to smile at him, but Mitchell...Mitchell got to see that right away. No resentment toward Mitchell, no indeed.
“What’s new, pal?” Mitchell asked.
“Um, I’m may be getting my pilot’s license. And I’m in this boxing club? There’s a tournament in two weeks, and you should come!”
“Maybe. Let’s get going, okay? Your grandmother isn’t exactly thrilled to see me, know what I mean? Wanna grab something to eat, sport?”
“Sure! Yeah, of course!”
Mitchell glanced at Tom again. “Uh, listen, I’m gonna spend a little time with my son, okay?”
Tom nodded. “You do that.” He looked at Charlie. “Talk to you soon, mate.”
“Mate?” Mitchell smirked. “Yeah, that word has different connotations here, pal.” He shot Charlie a look. “Am I right, buddy?”
For a half second, Charlie looked conflicted. Then he glanced at his father and smirked. “Yeah. I keep telling him that.” He rolled his eyes. “It’s kind of gay, Tom.”
Ah.
“See you soon,” Tom said, but Charlie was already talking to Mitchell, awash in happiness over seeing his father. Then Mitchell, the deadbeat, neglectful, selfish bastard, slung his arm around Charlie’s shoulders and led him to the Mustang.
Charlie didn’t look back.
It doesn’t mean anything,
Tom told himself.
Unfortunately, he knew better.
* * *
H
ONOR
’
S
PHONE
BUZZED
with a text.
Had to go to Wickham. See you sometime tonight.
That was...odd. Terse. Then again, texts were all too easy to misinterpret. She hit Call and waited. Tom’s voice mail came on.
You’ve reached Tom Barlow. Leave a message, and I’ll call you when I’m free. Cheers.
“Hi, Tom, it’s Honor,” she said, wincing. Hopefully, he knew her voice by now. “Just wanted to make sure everything was okay. I guess you’re working? Um, let me know if you want dinner. Or we could go to O’Rourke’s or something, if you were in the mood. Anyway, today was really great.” She paused. “Have a good rest of the afternoon. Bye. See you later. Talk to you soon.”
Hang up the damn phone,
the eggs said, peering over their reading glasses as they knit.
She hung up.
He’s blowing you off,
they observed with sympathetic certainty.
“No, he’s not. There is no evidence of that,” she said.
But by nine o’clock that night, the evidence was pretty strong.
What had happened? After a magically perfect ten days, when it had felt like something shifted, like that cement barrier had come down, the wall was suddenly back. No phone call. One text to say,
Don’t think I’ll make it back for dinner.
She mentally reviewed the day. Four hours with Tom and Charlie. Had she said something? Was Charlie okay? Had Charlie said something like
Don’t marry Honor, I hate her?
Because, quite frankly, she thought the kid might like her.
Screw it. She grabbed her phone, then put it down. Considered a text, typed a few words, deleted them.
Spike scrabbled against her calf, and Honor bent over and picked the little fluff ball up. “Any ideas?” she asked the doggy. Spike flopped on her back, offering her belly, and Honor idly rubbed it.
She watched TV for an hour—
The Mysterious World of Pork-Borne Illnesses.
Wondered idly if she had a tapeworm and, if so, could she eat unlimited amounts of Ben & Jerry’s Cinnamon Bun. When her phone rang, she lunged for it, earning a bark of protest from Spike. “Hello?”
“Hey. It’s Dana.”
Honor jerked in surprise. “Hi.”
“How are you?”
Spike yawned, already bored. “I’m fine. How are you?”
“You sound blue.”
“Nope.” The days of mood discussions had ended some time ago. “What can I do for you?”
Dana was quiet for a minute. “I don’t know. I called on impulse.”
Not every friendship was meant to last forever. Honor knew that. It didn’t mean you couldn’t miss the old times, even knowing those old times couldn’t be repeated.
“How are things with you?” she asked.
“They’re fine.”
“You feeling okay?”
“Sure. Why?”
Honor paused. “Um, just because you’re pregnant.”
“Right. No, I feel the same. Normal. I mean, everything’s normal.” Dana paused. “So you and Tom were pretty funny at the Black and White Ball.”
“I guess so.”
“He seems...great.” There was an odd note of yearning in Dana’s voice.
“He is,” Honor said. There was silence on the other end. “So why are you calling, Dana?”
“I don’t know.” She sighed. “You ever worry that Tom might find something out about you, and not like you anymore?”
Fungus. She didn’t want to have a relationship talk with Dana. Dana, who pretended not to know how much Honor had loved Brogan. Who’d blindsided her and dismissed her feelings.
But maybe Dana had been right about those feelings. After all, Honor now firmly believed she was in love with Tom, her walled-off, funny, delicious Brit.
“Not really,” Honor said hesitantly. “I don’t know that there’s anything to find out. That he doesn’t know already, I mean.”
“I probably shouldn’t be calling you to talk about this stuff,” Dana said, her voice small and sad.
“Yeah, it’s a little weird.”
“You were always a good friend.”
The words brought an unexpected lump to Honor’s throat. “Thanks.”
“And I wasn’t.”
“Is that an apology?”
Dana sighed. “Yes.”
“Accepted.”
“So are we friends again?”
Honor smoothed the scraggly fur on top of Spike’s head. “I don’t know.”
“You just said you accepted my apology.” Already, there was a defensive note in Dana’s voice.
“I really enjoyed our friendship,” Honor said now, carefully. “But I’m not sure we can go back to that.”
“But I just apologized! And I think you know that’s not easy for me.”
“Right. But...” She hesitated. “Dana, you have to realize—”
“Look, I’m going through some
stuff,
Honor, and people screw up, and I’m sorry! Are you going to hold this against me for my whole life?”
“No,” Honor said. “I’m really over it. But I just don’t—”
“You can forgive, you just can’t forget that I dared to get the man you wanted. You know what? Forget it.”
“Dana—” Nope. She’d hung up.
And that was just fine with Honor. Dana was demanding, selfish and always managed to give herself carte blanche when it came to her dealings with other people. She was always the wronged party, and never at fault.
While life had felt emptier without her friendship for a while, it also felt cleaner. Other people had filled the space Dana and Brogan had left.
She had Tom now. Didn’t she?
The silence of the house was deafening.
Where was he? What happened today? Was she really going to have to call Levi and see if there’d been any accidents?
Spike yawned, then began gnawing on Honor’s thumb.
The door opened, and Tom walked in. Unsteadily.
“Hey,” Honor said, rising to her feet.
“Hallo, darling,” he said. He put his wallet on the hall table and missed.
“Have you been drinking?”
“Yes.”
“And driving?” she barked.
“No, darling. I’m not a bloody idiot, am I? No, I drove stone-cold sober from the college to O’Rourke’s and then had a drink. More than one. And then I walked home to our pleasant abode to find my affianced, adorably concerned.”
“I
was
concerned. Why didn’t you call me?”
“Sorry. I should have. Hindsight and all that. But here I am all the same.” Spike jumped off the couch to growl. “Hallo, Ratty,” Tom said. “Careful, I’d hate to step on you.” Spike took the laces of Tom’s shoes in her teeth and whipped her head back and forth.
The phone rang again. Honor answered it. “Hey, it’s Colleen. Just wanted to make sure Tom got home okay. Connor took his keys.”
“He’s here and fine,” Honor said. “Thanks, Coll. And thank Connor for me, too.”
“No prob, hon. He’s a sweetheart, your Tom. See you soon!”
She hung up the phone. “I thought you were going to cut back,” she said.
“And I have,” he said. “Three drinks is hardly pissed, my sweet little Puritanical nag. Nor is four.”
“Connor O’Rourke had to take your keys.”
“No, love. I gave him my keys on the minute possibility that I might have a fit of idiocy and decide to drive.” He certainly sounded sober. “Now, I’m going to bed, darling. Care to join me?”
She didn’t answer.
“Right. Good night, then.”
With that, Tom gently shook Spike free and went upstairs, leaving Honor standing in the middle of the living room, surrounded by the quiet once more.