The Other Side of Summer (20 page)

I felt numb about what I’d done to the guitar because I’d expected something instant and magical to happen. I thought I’d set Gabe free, but what did that mean? There was no sign that I’d done anything apart from ruin my brother’s most precious possession. Life –
my
life, anyway – was the same as usual.

Although that wasn’t completely true. One thing was better. Wren and I were side by side on the porch bench again, with Bee at our feet. This was becoming our place.

Earlier, she’d let me borrow a pair of her black jeans and she’d braided my hair.

‘Hey, you’ve grown,’ she’d said when I was trying on her stuff.

‘Have I?’ I hadn’t believed it, even though my feet poking out of the legs of her jeans said that it must be true.

Now we were watching Milo shoot hoops. We cheered loudly whenever he got one in. He pretended not to enjoy it but I could tell he did. He still wasn’t very good so Wren and I had plenty of time to talk in between.

‘Wren,’ I started, not really sure if I should continue. ‘When did you … Why did you … No,
how
did you suddenly become so nice?’ I looked at her nervously and then smiled clownishly, hoping she’d know I meant it in a nice way.

‘I’m not nice!’ she said.

I raised an eyebrow.

‘Fine. Look, I just decided. After what Gran said. I decided I would
pretend
to be nice to you and Dad.’

I started to giggle and then she did, too.

‘And after a while, it wasn’t so difficult. I got used to it. Also, when no one’s looking I pull wings off butterflies.’

‘I knew it.’

We watched Milo again.

‘Have you kissed him?’ I said after a while.

‘Sh!’ Wren nudged me.

‘Ow! Well, have you?’

‘Not yet. I’m not sure if I want to.’

‘How come?’

She shrugged. ‘I’m not sure if I like boys that way. I mean, I do, but I also like girls. And not everyone is going to be okay with that. So …’

I looked at Milo and tried to act cool. My sister had never shared anything like that with me, and I didn’t want to get this wrong.

‘I think he’d be okay with it. He’s Milo. He’s pretty awesome. And he
should
be okay with it. Everyone should be.’

‘I know they should. I feel like they should. But thanks. Ratbag.’ She nudged me again and this time she smiled so widely that her dimple showed.

I’d forgotten she had one. I didn’t say anything, but I smiled back and felt six feet tall.

We sat there for a while, then Milo got two in a row so we got on our feet, cheering. That’s when I saw her. The woman was at the top of the street, in front of a yellow taxi. Clue number one: the woman had a suitcase. Clue number two: her hair was down to her waist.

Wren was still cheering, and I tugged her sleeve. Clue number three: Wren froze too. She’d seen. I watched her trying to believe her eyes like I was.

Wren and I stepped off the porch together. I was still holding Wren’s sleeve.

Clue number four: the woman was walking towards us, fast, faster.

Clue number five: Wren opened the gate and started to run. I ran too. I caught up with her and when Wren glanced at me (clue number six) she had tears in her eyes and was smiling.

We got there at the same time. The woman held out her arms.

Clue number seven: her smell. Clue number eight: how tightly she held me. Clue number nine: the way I cried and cried and cried.

Clue number ten: I looked up at Mum’s face and she smiled.

On Saturday morning there was a knock on my bedroom door. It was Mum. My heart still jumped whenever I saw her.

‘Can I come in?’

I propped myself up on my elbow and patted the end of my bed.

‘I’ve had an idea. I know you said Gabriel’s mother was ill with dementia, but we should go back to see her, don’t you think? Maybe we’ll discover something.’

I nodded, overwhelmed that Mum was still thinking about this. Since she’d arrived, three days ago, Mum had been asleep a lot because of jet lag and we’d hardly been alone.

‘I can’t seem to rest easy without knowing what happened,’ she said. ‘And if Gabriel was the last person to see Floyd … Well, I’d just like to talk to him. I’m still wondering if he’s just travelling with his dad,’ she said. ‘And there’s us ringing hospitals … Gabriel’s probably having the time of his life.’

‘It’s “Gabe”, Mum, and I already told you he’s not.’ I didn’t mean to snap, and part of me worried that she’d get up and walk out and go straight back home if I was rude or mean. But all she did was look into my eyes, deeply, and touch my face.

‘Come on, then. Up you get and we’ll see what we can find out.’

I took Mum to Gabe’s building the long way, along the beautiful creek. On the way we talked about all the little details of my life that were new to her. It made me realise that so much had become familiar to me and I hadn’t even noticed. I wasn’t so much a stranger here as I had been.

When we got there, I pointed up towards the windows of Gabe’s apartment.

‘Please tell me there’s a lift,’ said Mum.

From the hallway at the top level we could see right into Gabe’s kitchen but it didn’t look like anyone was there. Mum rang the doorbell. The woman who answered was very tall, like the one I’d seen that night
and thought must be Yana. She didn’t look happy about being disturbed.

‘Yes?’

‘Hello, I’m Cece and this is my daughter, Summer. Um … This is a bit complicated but I believe my son knew a boy who used to live here.’

‘A boy? What boy?’

‘We’re looking for Gabriel,’ said Mum.

The woman looked suspiciously from me to Mum. She didn’t look like she was going to say a word in reply, and Mum looked at me as if to say, ‘What now?’

‘Are you Yana?’ I said shyly.

She narrowed her eyes and looked down her nose at me. I tried hard to keep going, feeling my way around each of my words because although they’d be true, they wouldn’t be the
whole
truth. ‘Gabe was my brother’s friend. They were very close. And, well, my brother died and I promised that I’d find Gabe and make sure he was okay. Do you know anything about where he is?’

Her expression changed almost imperceptibly but enough to let me know she wasn’t a mean person, she was just being careful. ‘I don’t know everything, I am just Mrs de Souza’s carer. And Mrs de Souza is not well enough, you understand?’

I nodded. Yana’s accent had made her sound cross at the start but that same accent now sounded kind.

‘He was in an accident. Many injuries.’

I felt Mum’s hand tighten on my shoulder. ‘But he’s not dead,’ I said.

‘Not dead,’ she said sternly, as if she meant ‘only just’, but all I cared about was that Gabe was really alive, just like he’d told me.

‘When you say “accident”,’ said Mum, ‘what do you mean?’ Her voice sounded shaky and I wondered again if I’d done the wrong thing in asking Mum for help.

‘He was in a bad car crash. He is at the Royal Melbourne, that’s all I know.’

The word ‘Melbourne’ rang in my ears as if Yana had crashed cymbals together right next to my head. He was here all along.

‘Mrs de Souza doesn’t visit,’ said Yana. ‘It’s not good for her. She knows him one day, doesn’t know him the next.’ Yana looked over her shoulder. ‘It’s been a long time.’ She shook her head solemnly.

Then everything around me seemed to go quiet, like I was in our bubble again, as what Yana said sank in. I stared at her without really seeing her. I knew that Mum had put her arm around me, but I couldn’t really feel it.

Gabe was here in Melbourne.

‘We have to go there. Now!’ I was striding ahead, without any idea of the direction we should be going.

‘Summer, breathe. Remember what that woman said. Gabriel has been hit by a car and he’s been in a coma for weeks.’

‘But how did he …? But why …?’ I was thinking about the guitar and the snatches of my dreams that kept flying at me like tiny swooping birds but never stayed in one place long enough for me to see them properly.

‘I’m worried you’re getting your hopes up,’ said Mum, stopping me finally.

I was surprised to find she was right. I still had hope. ‘I can’t help it.’

Mum’s eyes were sparkling and then hesitantly she put her arms around me. ‘You’ve grown up a lot. I’m so sorry, Summer.’

I stopped for a moment and looked at Mum properly. I didn’t say it was okay, but I did squeeze her tight.

Mum had obviously been doing some private plotting on our way to the hospital because when we eventually found the right ward she told the nurse on the desk that we were Gabe’s second cousins from England. I wasn’t even sure what a second cousin was.

‘Well, you’ve come a long way!’ he said, smiling. When he stood up he seemed to go on forever; he was at least six foot five, with a shiny bald head. His badge said Nasib. He called to another nurse and asked her to look after the desk.

‘These people have come to see Gabriel,’ he told her.

It sunk in deeper that he was really here.

Nasib started walking briskly in silent shoes, and I wanted to tell him to slow down, I wasn’t ready. But it was happening. I had to let myself get carried along, though my legs were jelly.

‘We were wondering if anyone was going to show up for the poor boy,’ said Nasib, glancing back. He was holding a clipboard close to his chest. I wondered if it
held Gabe’s medical notes, and what they would say. We passed room after room of patients, turned into another corridor, kept walking.

‘The surgeon will come and speak to you properly. Gabriel came out of his coma a few days ago and we’ve been working on various things since then.’

‘What date? What time?’ I said.

Nasib stopped and checked his chart. ‘Two am, Wednesday. Why, is that significant?’

‘No, I mean, I just wondered.’ I knew it. That was when I’d cut the guitar strings. I hadn’t been able to look at the Ibanez Artwood since then. But the magic had happened.

‘He’s had an operation today – a big one – so we’re hoping he’s going to wake soon and we can see if we’ve fixed the damage. It’ll be wonderful for him to see familiar faces.’

Mum smiled and gave me a worried look. She took my hand.

Nasib stopped by a doorway, blocking it with his enormous frame. We were finally here. ‘Don’t expect miracles,’ he said. ‘But we’re hopeful. He had some pretty strange injuries for a car accident – especially as the driver of the car claimed they weren’t going very fast – but we think he’s come out of the worst of it now.’

‘Well, you see, I don’t think he was
just
in a car accident,’ I said, pulling on Mum’s hand because she was trying to make me go in before I was ready. ‘I think Gabe was injured before the car accident. By a bomb in London, just before he got back here.’

‘A bomb? That’s quite some claim. How do you know this?’

I bit my bottom lip. ‘I don’t know for sure.’

‘Well, I’m not sure what to say. Surely someone couldn’t be so unlucky? Then again, I’ve seen some things in this job that most people wouldn’t believe.’

Nasib was being kind. I knew he was suspicious of what I was saying, but then he looked at his notes and I saw from his expression that what I was telling him made a bit of sense. He swung his body like a door opening to show us we’d arrived.

‘I’ll be back in a moment,’ he said.

Gabe. It was really Gabe. The sight of him squeezed my heart painfully. His head was bandaged but the top of his scalp was showing. They’d shaved all his hair off. He looked peaceful. And so real. The way he’d looked to me before, in our bubble, seemed like a hologram compared to how he looked now. His skin was darker, his edges were more defined. I was so scared. He might not know me. Or he might know me but it might not feel the same. He could wake and be free of our bubble
but I’d stay trapped inside it, wanting things to be the way they were.

We sat by the side of his bed. Mum held his hand. I knew she’d be thinking about Floyd.

I’m here, Summer.

I know you are. Thank you. This is so hard, Floyd. I wish you were …

I know.

Once or twice I thought I saw Gabe’s eyelashes flicker and I held my breath, but in the next moment he seemed to be sleeping as deeply as before.

A while later, Nasib came back in.

‘Right. Looks like someone’s having a sleep-in,’ he said, sternly but with a hint of affection for Gabe, like he was Gabe’s big brother. ‘Come on, sleepyhead. Rise and shine.’ He leaned over me and shook Gabe’s arm gently but firmly.

Gabe turned his head towards us and I think all three of us gasped.

‘I think it’s happening, ladies,’ said Nasib.

A tiny frown appeared on Gabe’s forehead. His arm muscles twitched. He flexed his fingers. His eyes opened and he looked at Nasib.

‘Welcome back, Mr de Souza,’ said Nasib, warmly. As he stepped back and made a note on his chart, Gabe looked at me. His eyes suddenly burst wider and his
face was exactly like the time I’d first spoken to him in my bedroom, full of fear and shock. He started breathing heavily.

‘What’s happening? Where am I? Summer! Who are these people?’ He was grabbing at wires that were attached to him and trying in vain to raise his head.

Nasib stepped between us to try to make him lie down, and I had to walk around to the end of the bed so I could see Gabe and let him see me.

‘Gabriel, you’re okay but you must lie still and relax,’ Nasib said firmly.

‘Who are you?’ he said. He tried to shout but his voice was rasping.

‘You know me, Gabriel. I’m Nasib. I’ve been looking after you.’

Gabe tried to get up again. ‘Summer, what is this place? Summer! Help me!’

‘Gabe! It’s okay!’ I cupped my hands over my mouth and cried.

Gabe was thrashing around but he was much too weak, and Nasib held him down easily.

‘How does he know you, Summer?’ whispered Mum, coming to my side again.

Gabe’s eyes were closing again.

‘Is he okay? Why’s he closing his eyes?’ I yelled at Nasib.

‘He’ll be fine. I’ve seen this many times. More often in younger children, though.’ Nasib checked the bag attached to the drip going into Gabe’s arm, and then gently rested his hand on Gabe’s forehead. ‘It’s called emergence delirium. Patients wake up and have no memory of why they’re here. Often they don’t even know their own family, so at least it’s something that he recognised you, eh?’ He smiled at me, and then returned to check Gabe’s pulse and heartbeat. ‘He’ll wake up again in a moment and he’ll be calm and remember why he’s here.’

I counted the seconds. Exactly four minutes and twenty-five seconds after he’d first woken, Gabe woke again. He looked at the nurse.

‘Nas,’ he said.

Nasib lay one of his giant hands on Gabe’s arm. ‘That’s more like it. Now, do you know these people?’

Gabe’s head turned to my mum. He frowned, blinked slowly.

‘Floyd’s mum,’ he said.

‘That’s right,’ Mum said softly. She had tears in her eyes.

‘I don’t understand.’ He coughed, and looked at the nurse, who seemed to know that what he needed was water. He held a straw to Gabe’s lips.

‘Your cousins have come to see you,’ said Nasib.

‘Cousins?’

Nasib gave Mum a gently scolding look. ‘Mmm … Well, close friends, perhaps? You know this lovely girl here, though, remember?’ Nasib beckoned me closer. ‘Come on, Gabriel, you just said her name not five minutes ago.’

I could see Gabe searching his mind, not finding me, and I had to look away.

‘Well, not to worry, now, it’ll come to you.’ Nasib’s warm, happy voice was such a strange birdsong in this room. He wheeled a machine around the back of me and out of the room. ‘Shall we go and have a quick chat about things?’ he said to Mum.

‘Will you be all right for a moment, Summer?’ said Mum.

I nodded. Mum looked a mixture of teary and suspicious as she left me. I couldn’t blame her. But I knew we trusted each other in the most important way.

And then once again it was like the time Gabe had appeared in my bedroom, when I’d had to count to three and then turn around and look him directly in the eyes.

‘Summer?’ said Gabe.

I nodded, my heart catching.

‘And we’ve met?’

So this was how it was going to be. He didn’t
remember me with the part of his brain that did most of the thinking. I was buried somewhere else.

‘Not properly.’ I smiled awkwardly. There were things I needed to know, and questions he’d have, too, eventually. But it didn’t matter whether Gabe remembered me now, in the next hour, or ever. Because we were here in the same place, at the same time, and that was a wish or a miracle, whichever way I looked at it.