The Other Duke (17 page)

“And reminding me that with my new power comes unavoidable responsibility and also an opportunity to do something of value in this world. I would say that is quite promising.”

She seemed to ponder what he had said for a moment. “I envy the childhood you describe, Rafe. Not for the freedom you had, though that does sound like great fun, but for the family. I was never a part of something like that. It is a lovely thought.”

She turned her face, but he still saw her profile. There was sadness in her face, regret, but also strength and intelligence. He wanted to wash away the first feelings. He wanted to keep her from ever feeling alone again.

And it was in that moment that he realized he had begun to do exactly what he’d vowed never to do.

He was falling in love with his wife.

Rafe leaned his head against the glass of the carriage window and stared across the vehicle at her forlornly. “I do not want to do this.”

She laughed at his sad puppy dog expression. “You have said that for two balls and one garden party and now this!”

“And
that
is exactly why I don’t want to do this. I am exhausted by people.” He folded his arms in an open challenge of her.

Her laughter grew because this playful exchange seemed to be the norm between them. As if he were the petulant student and she the stern teacher bound to drag him through his education.

“You know it is only your family we are going to see,” she reminded him.

“Who is more exhausting than my mother, brother and sister?” he asked.

“My father,” she offered softly, the teasing suddenly leaving her voice as she thought of the fact that her father had been invited to the gathering tonight as well.

It was a kindness of Rafe’s mother to include him in this family event, but one she wished Mrs. Flynn had not bestowed. She had not seen him since her wedding, now almost two weeks ago. Sadly, she had not missed him despite the fact this was the longest time they had been parted.

“Serafina,” Rafe began softly, reaching across the space between them.

She forced herself to smile to lighten the mood. “I only mean that it is
I
who should be hesitant about tonight, not you.”

He held her gaze for a moment, then leaned back against the leather seat. She could see he wanted to discuss the situation with her, but he returned to teasing her instead to make her more comfortable.

“If you are having second thoughts, we could go home.” His smile turned wicked. “I could think of better things to do together.”

She blushed, as she always blushed when she thought of making love with him.

“But you always want to do the same thing,” she said with a shake of her head. “We have done that
thing
plenty of times. Creativity is key, Rafe.”

She expected him to smile, but instead the desire they had been dancing about in the conversation suddenly flared higher, and there wasn’t a hint of joking in his tone when he growled, “You have no idea of the heights of my imagination when it comes to you.”

She dropped her gaze into her lap because the intensity between them felt like fire, and playing with fire was something dangerous and undeniable. The fact was, she might say they had made love enough, but she didn’t feel like it was true at all. To her utter shock, since she had been allowed to play with Rafe, touch him, stroke him while he did nothing but allow her power, her desire for him had only grown. She had given up sleeping in her own chamber at all, forgoing privacy for heady nights of passion with him.

But it would come to an end soon enough. They had made their joint appearances to show the
ton
that they were wed and not a subject of continued scandal. Rafe was looking for a home for her. She couldn’t imagine it would be more than a week or two before he found something and had it readied for her.

And then they would only have their friendship between them and occasional times of passionate joining to create their sons and daughters. These first weeks of their marriage would become nothing but a joyful memory for her. She would go on with her life, free of confusing emotions, free to obligation to do as she was told, free as she had always wanted to be.

At least, that was what she told herself when she allowed herself to think of the future. It never made her feel better.

“You have become very serious,” he said. “Has something fascinating developed in your lap or has your mind fled my company?”

She glanced up. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to float away.”

“As long as you come back,” he said, and now he did take her hand, squeezing gently before he released her with a sigh. “We are turning up the drive.”

She nodded. “Indeed we are.”

“Would you like to present a united front to the families? It could very well be our best chance of survival.”

She smiled and nodded, but inside his comment stung a fraction. A united front with Rafe was only a dream. It wouldn’t last.

And that had begun to trouble her more and more, despite the fact that it was entirely her own choice.

Rafe found himself tracking Serafina’s every move as she stood across the parlor with Crispin. Despite his younger brother’s hesitations about Rafe’s wife, it seemed she had weaved a spell over him.

Just as she had done with him. Rafe had realized he was in love with the woman across the room not a week before and had said nothing about that to anyone. Perhaps he had hoped the intense emotion would fade, that he would discover it was only the byproduct of passionate love-making.

But it wasn’t. The more distance he moved from that initial discovery of his heart, the stronger the feeling became. There was no denying it now. He
was
in love with Serafina.

And she wanted nothing to do with love or even a shared future with him. The terms of their bargain had not changed for her, even though they had been altered irrevocably for him.

He frowned and forced himself to look away from his wife. Instead, he found her father standing across the room with his mother. Jonathon McPhee talked on what seemed to be an endless stream, and his mother briefly glanced across the room toward Rafe. Her expression was a combination of both apology and a desire to be saved from another moment with the man.

He doubted McPhee would be invited to more family gatherings. And yet, Rafe’s rage toward Serafina’s father and his willingness to trade on his daughter’s future was unmitigated. At some point, he
would
have it out with the man.

“Excuse me, Your Grace, have you seen my oldest brother? Raphael is his name.”

Rafe turned toward the voice that asked the question and smiled down at his sister, Annabelle. He could see the concern in her brown eyes.

“Don’t tell me you think I am so changed since becoming duke,” he said, almost happy to stop thinking about Sera and her father, though this new topic was no more comfortable.

“I’m not certain it is becoming duke that is changing you,” his sister said softly. “I approached you and all the laughing playfulness was gone from your face. I saw a very serious man in my brother’s body.”

He shrugged. “Isn’t it you who is always telling Crispin and me to be more staid? To stop cultivating notoriety for our family name with our recklessness?”

She frowned slightly and then nodded. “I suppose I have said that. And meant it when it was said. But I didn’t intend for you to lose yourself in the process.”

He let his gaze slip to Serafina once more. Crispin had gone to refresh her after-supper drink and she stood alone in the middle of the parlor. She was utterly beautiful, completely irresistible.

“I actually think I may have found myself, Annabelle, not lost myself.”

Annabelle stared at him, then followed his gaze toward his wife. Her eyes went wide and she suddenly grasped his arm and began to drag him from the room.

“Mama, I am going to show Raphael my new pianoforte,” she called out in a singsong tone no one in the world could have trusted.

Their mother glanced at the two of them and her face still sought escape from her companion. “Perhaps you could—”

Annabelle cut her mother off. “We’ll return in a moment.”

As they exited the room, Rafe made an attempt to shake off his sister’s remarkably powerful grip, but she continued to drag him away.

“Mama was trying to get rid of Serafina’s awful father,” he said as she all but flung him into the music room and shut the door behind them.

“I know what she was trying to do, but I cannot have a conversation with you while
that man
is in the room.” Annabelle straightened her skirts. “I will make it up to her when I return and insert myself in their conversation as respite.”

Rafe looked around. “And what do you need to talk to me in private about? Because I assume you know I don’t give a damn about your pianoforte.”

Annabelle waved her hand. “Neither do I.”

Rafe frowned. His sister was vastly talented in her music but dismissed it regularly. But that was a topic for another conversation.

“What is it?”

“I could ask
you
the same thing.” Annabelle folded her arms. “You were mooning over Serafina a moment ago.
Mooning
Rafe! I’ve never seen you do such a thing.”

Rafe tensed. Was he so obvious? But he was not about to talk about this with his youngest sibling.

“Mooning? You must be daft.” He rolled his eyes.

She caught his arm and shook it. “Don’t lie to me Raphael Flynn. I’m not stupid. I know what I saw.”

“She’s a very pretty woman,” he said, minimizing everything he thought or felt about Serafina. “And I do desire her. Perhaps
that
is what you see.”

Annabelle made a face at his mention of desire, but she didn’t seem stopped by that topic she hated. “Rafe.”

He turned and walked away, passing by all the instruments his sister was so talented at playing. He stopped before the aforementioned new pianoforte and stared blankly at its shiny surface.

“Truly, you are seeing phantoms.”

She said nothing for a moment, and Rafe dared to believe he had been saved from her intrusion. But then she slowly crossed the room, turned him toward her and reached up to cup his cheeks.

“You know I adore you, despite any desire I may have had about calming your wild nature for my own selfish motives.” She smiled up at him. “Obviously there is something going on, and who else will you talk to? Crispin wrecks himself every night, creating scenarios about your unhappiness of being forced into your title and marriage. And Mama will meddle out of a desire for your good.”

Rafe pursed his lips. Both those statements were utterly true.

“You are left with me,” Annabelle said softly. “I only want to know what is in your heart now, so that I can help you.”

“You can’t help me,” he groaned.

She frowned. “Then allow me to simply be a confidante. I will not judge, not you and not her.”

Rafe pulled away from her gentle hands and sighed as he stared down at her. Annabelle wasn’t like her brothers. While they went wild, she had tried to cultivate whatever she thought a lady should be. Sometimes he saw a glint in her eyes that spoke to her untamed Flynn nature, but very rarely did she express it.

And yet he knew she loved him as deeply as she had just claimed. And since she was of an age with Serafina, and trustworthy… she might be correct that she was the best person with whom to discuss this thorny problem.

He cleared his throat. “I—I am in love with my wife.”

It was the first time he had said it out loud and he waited for it to ring false in the air around him. It never did. In fact, it had never felt so true.

She leaned forward. “I beg your pardon?”

“You will have me declare it again? Very well. I am in love with Serafina.”

Her smile broadened. “Oh, Rafe, that is wonderful. I wish you every happiness—”