The NSC Boxset: Heart of Stone (228 page)

He shook his head again and pulled out his phone and I watched in shocked astonishment as he phoned Sam and ordered a fucking van to fetch me.

He shrugged sheepishly as he replaced his phone and fiddled with his fingers so he wouldn’t have to look at me.

I pulled in a heavy breath and smirked as I started to peel off my shirt and trousers. Mason frowned then looked around, scoping the place out for people as I decided to get naked. “What are you doing?”

I scoffed as I unhooked my bra and threw it into a nearby bush along with the rest of my dirty clothes. “If you think I’m standing in horse shit whilst I wait for a
friend
to take me home, then you are sorely mistaken.”

“Ava!” he shouted out as I thumbed the edge of my knickers, “No, Christ, at least leave your knickers on.”

I quirked a brow then dropped my eyes to his t-shirt. He frowned then looked down to see what I was gesturing to but shot me a horrified look when he realised I wanted his shirt. “Ava, it’s my
Queen
t-shirt!” He wittered as he placed his hands on it protectively.

I nodded and grinned, “I know, such a shame I need it. I don’t think you’ll be able to get the smell out after either.”

I’m sure he discharged a distraught sob but he coughed to cover it and I rolled my lips, relishing the fact that it was now my turn to struggle with the belt of humour.

“Uhh . . .”

I gasped loudly but phonily, however, Mason didn’t need to know that. “So not only are you refusing to take me home, you are making me stand in the middle of nowhere naked!”

“But . . .” He shot various glances between me and his shirt before he sighed sadly and grabbed the hem, lifting it slowly over his head and jerkily held it out to me.

I smiled at him and held my hand out but he snatched it back quickly and held it against his bare chest, “Mason, would you like me to say a prayer.”

He scowled at me and grumbled something under his breath as he closed his eyes and gave it me. I chuckled quietly as I slipped it over my naked chest and sighed happily. He did love me, and enough to give me his sacred t-shirt.

A white van pulled in as Marcy waved frantically out of the windscreen at me and I beamed happily.

“Ava!” she chirped as she ran over and skidded to a halt inches from me when the stench hit her nostrils. “Jesus Christ hun, what the hell happened?”

I shot a glare at Mason and proceeded to fill her in as Sam came round and opened the rear doors. “I am not fucking cattle!” I barked at him.

He coughed and said something which I didn’t catch. A bark of laughter broadcast from Mason and I whipped my face to his, “What? What did he say?”

“Nothing baby, just that it’s a hired vehicle and you can’t mucky the seats. You’ll have to get in the back.” He had the grace to grimace—luckily for him.

“You are gonna pay for this, Fox!” I growled as I clambered in the back of the van and huddled against the side, drawing my knees up and hugging them.

“I saved you from a rabid bloody badger!” he declared with astonishment.

“We were getting on fine until you came along!” I scoffed, “You just scared him.”

He sighed and shook his head, “Of course, baby.”

I nodded and narrowed my eyes but he grinned and winked, the action bubbling my tummy with happy detonations. “Do I get a kiss?” I asked with a quirked brow.

His eyes perused my body as I swiftly opened my knees and shot him a look at my sexy shit filled knickers. He laughed heartily as he grabbed my upper arms and pulled me towards him, “You know what Ava Fox, no matter how much shit you bring into my life, you always partner it with so much happiness that I can’t help but love you.”

“And me, you” I whispered flashing my pearly whites at him, the only clean thing left of me before I slipped my hand behind his head and brought it close to mine, devouring my glorious bastard in a toe curling kiss.

He didn’t realise I wiped my fingers in his hair whilst I was there.

The End

You have to learn the rules of the game.

And then you have to play better than anyone else.

Albert Einstein

Prologue

Kade

8 months previous

SHE WAS SO damn beautiful and I grimaced as I palmed the glass wall for reinforcement. Not only was she the pulse that powered the blood through my system but she was also the beat my heart needed to pump that blood and the energy that fed sustenance to it.

I needed her.

My very essence needed her.

I dragged air urgently through my nose and looked down at my luggage. Four bags that contained my life, four bags that would accompany me on the start of a new life in Portugal, but as my eyes lifted again, locking onto the woman who stole my soul seven years ago, my fingers unfolded and they clattered to the floor with a thud that matched the drop of my heart.

The hole that had begun to open when I had first watched her dance that night all those years ago began to widen and tear further, splitting me open in its rage and hatred.

Whoever said heartache is an emotion and nothing to do with the actual muscle spoke utter bullshit, because the pain tearing through my breastbone was physical, it was
very
fucking physical. It bruised, it stung and god damn it was trying to fucking kill me as it threatened to swallow me from the inside and steal every breath I tried to take.

I gasped at the intensity it clenched me with as it tried to climb up my throat so it could bodily make itself known, could tangibly put its hands around my face, look me in the eye and say ‘What the fuck are you doing, you bloody fool?’

She repeatedly glanced nervously at Mason as she watched for me, as she waited for me to climb the few stairs onto the plane with them and start a new life.

But, I couldn’t do that.

I couldn’t take any more from her that I hadn’t already.

She owned me, I knew that, I had always known that but Mason owned
her
and to make her divide her heart between us would eventually rip that amazing, delicate organ into pieces and I wasn’t willing to do that; no matter how much the pain and agony clawed at me and threatened to take me down as I stepped foot onto the tarmac and drank in every single inch of her.

I refused to let her see the wobble in my legs, the pain that was engulfing me or the utter devastation that was breaking me in two as I slowly walked over to them.

I will never forget the look on her face as her soul darkened and her spirit crumbled when she read me, when she realised I was staying behind and I forced myself to drag up any bits of courage I had left inside me to do this.

She shook her head rapidly as I approached, the pain displayed openly on her beautiful face and I savoured the small smile that curled my lips at the sight of her stunning beauty. It would be the last smile that I would make in a long time.

“Kade?” Ava swept her eyes over my face as I neared and the pain she exhibited so very nearly defeated me, almost made me sprint back into the lounge, pick up my bags and refuse to accept what my head was rightly telling me. “Don’t do this, Kade, please.”

I gulped, trying desperately to push air past the lump of hatred stuck in my throat. “Kade?” She repeated more sternly, her clear enchanting voice no longer a whisper as her anger with me climbed higher.

“We would never survive, Ava.”

Damn the break in my voice. She shouldn’t hear that, I didn’t want or need her to hear it. She was hurting enough and I would be damned to hell if I caused this beautiful creature anymore hurt.

“What? What the hell are you on about?” The shock on her face held a flicker of understanding and I knew then that I was doing the right thing. I would sacrifice my soul to make things right between her and Mason. The damage I had done all those years ago already had a seat in Hell reserved with my name on it, but I wouldn’t accept that the Devil had glued it there. I needed to believe that it could be removed and torn up. Otherwise, what was the point to all this vicious agony?

Mason nodded in understanding. He stepped forward and palmed my cheek, “You know you can always join us if you change your mind.”

I nodded. “I do,” I answered with a genuine smile before I pulled him into an embrace, feasting on the respect and understanding he was offering. His firm hand on my back amplified my strength and I mirrored his firm nod before he turned his back and left me alone with Ava. My gratitude for these final solitary moments with his wife gave me a whole new admiration for him. He should have hated me for nearly destroying what they had but instead he had taken me inside him, just as I had taken him.

“Ava,” I whispered as I took a step closer to her. I needed to be closer but she retreated a step as if touching me would pain her, “Sweetheart, please.”

Her eyes pooled and she squeezed them closed, squeezing my heart with them. “No.”

I reached for her as I refused to let her distance herself, needing to touch her and I pulled her tiny frame against my own, inhaling her scent and burning it to memory, begging God that he never let me forget it. She struggled in my hold and I pulled her tighter as she fought me angrily, “Why? Why, Kade?” She sounded defeated as she buried her face in my chest, “It will be fine, it will work. I promise.”

“For now, maybe for a few months everything would be great but both Mason and me.” I paused as honesty flowed through me and I grabbed the opportunity to voice all that my head and my heart needed to rid themselves of, “We’re both so in love with you Ava that eventually we’re going to clash. We both want to own you, both of us want to possess every inch of you, we want you to be ours.”

I tilted her face to mine with a finger as I desperately tried to make her understand. “Our dominance over you will destroy us all and I couldn’t bear for either of you to hate me.”

“Never Kade, we could never hate you.” The sincerity in her voice echoed in her eyes and I smiled as I placed a kiss on her nose and slid my hand over her cheek, her soft skin calming my anxiousness just as it always had done.

“And what if I started to hate you? What if we each started to wonder if either of us is spending too much time with the other, or if Mason gives you a better orgasm than me? Or . . . or if Mason started to think you loved me more and were plotting to out him. Or you begin to imagine things that aren’t there between me and Mason?”

I needed her to understand and my soul begged her. If she never forgave me for this then I don’t think I would get through life knowing that I had hurt her to an extent of hate. “I’ll always love you Ava, always. You are my first love, the first woman who ever owned all of me. I need you to be happy, sweetheart. I need you to live your life now, not live in the shadow of two controlling men; two men who want everything of you, Ava. We’d drown you, suffocate you with love and I couldn’t bear it if we broke you in our desire to make you happy.”

“But,” she paused as she locked me down with her stunning green gaze, her eyes relaying everything her mouth was saying. “I love you, Kade.”

Oh fuck. The power of those words that I had longed to hear for so, so long engulfed my whole essence and freed something inside me as it coupled with an immense feeling of grief. I closed my eyes, letting the peace and chaos of her declaration flow through me but I cursed when I couldn’t hold back the emotion of them and a tear trickled down my face.

I pleaded right then, with God, with someone I had never had any faith in, an entity that had never given me any reason to believe, but right then and there, I begged with my soul, my spirit and my body to give me the strength I needed to let her walk away.

“I’ve loved you for eight years, Kade and I will love you for eternity.”

I nodded as the torrent of grief now descended in a wave of sobs, tearing me in two and hardening me physically as well as emotionally and mentally. I would never allow myself to feel again. This was too much. The torture was so immense it felt like my whole body was been seared from the inside out and I struggled to keep my heart beating as devastation destroyed me.

“As I will always love you Ava, forever and absolutely” I whispered as I rested my lips on her forehead and memorised every single thing about her; burnt to the corners of my mind the feel and smell of the only woman I had ever really loved truly and I knew I would only ever love with absolution again.

“Go.” I breathed frantically, beseeching with approaching hysterics that she go now before she witnessed my final and utter breakdown.

I took one final and ultimate breathe of her before she turned, walked, and never looked back.

Never again showed me her beautiful and mischievous smile.

Never again relished my spirit with her gentle touch.

Never again whispered in my ear what my touch did to her.

And never again allowed me to feel anything other than hatred and loathing.

I didn’t wait to watch them leave. I couldn’t bear to watch that, and as I strolled through the airport with desolation and bleakness beginning to consume me, I didn’t even realise I had left my luggage back by the window . . . along with my heart.