The Nemesis Blade (63 page)

“Suit yourselves,” Torrullin shrugged. He sent,
Teroux, sort the farspeaker out; she complains
too much.

Teroux pulled
a face and approached Rose. “We will wait below.”

Tianoman
followed them back into the tunnel.

Dechend,
indecisive, chose the jetty after a few minutes.

Saska neared
the edge. “This is realm time?”

“No, on this
ledge is known time,” Quilla murmured. “On the other side is realm
time.”

“Where is the
other side?”

“When,
actually,” Sabian laughed.

“How do we
cross?” Saska asked.

Nobody
answered.

She gazed up
at Torrullin. “Will you go wandering off and leave us behind? Could
you abandon us in that manner?”

He glanced at
her, and did not reply.

“Elianas?” she
demanded.

His head
swivelled to the side, although he did not turn from his
confrontation of the darkness. All she saw was his profile, before
he again faced the void.

He did not
speak.

Torrullin drew
breath. “We do this together.”

Caballa spoke
with a trace of anger in her tone. “I am going to organise a meal
below and don’t care what you lot do. We’ll call; come if you are
hungry … or still here. Are you coming, Saska?”

“Coming.”
Saska headed out, Caballa behind her.

Into the
ensuing silence, Sabian said, “I travelled the strata of time and
survived, because I desired transcendence that much. I was prepared
to face any truth about myself, even the worst.” He pointed at the
void. “This only appears empty, and in one sense it is; yet I tell
you it is pregnant with the layers time has thrown down. Stepping
stones and road markers.”

“Meaning?”
Quilla asked.

“We must leave the explainable behind, Q’lin’la. We must
accept that normal does not apply here. The river is done with, the
last route to our realm. Beyond lies a doorway and before us are
the stepping stones. We step to them, one at a time, and we do so
by speaking the truth. Real truth, hidden truth.
Only
truth.” Sabian
moved to stand at the edge. “Allow me to demonstrate.”

Without
looking at either Elianas beside him or Torrullin a step removed,
he drew in a breath and said, “My brother Margus, his real name
Michael, took my soul because he loved me.”

As Tristan
drew a shocked breath, Sabian stepped into the void.

A flat ellipse
of yellow light appeared under his feet, large enough for the team
to step onto.

It appeared
solid.

Sabian smiled.
“The first step. See? Until now I blamed Michael for wrenching my
soul from my body. Now I thank him for making this new chance
possible.” He stepped off. The ellipse remained.

“Gods, I need
a drink,” Tristan muttered.

Torrullin
cleared his throat. “As do I. Let us eat and rest before attempting
this … hell.”

He stalked
from the chamber.

Elianas’ arms
fell slack to his sides and, clearly, those remaining on the ledge
heard him curse.

Below in
‘sunlight’, with everyone gathered there to eat and rest, Quilla
urged Sabian to explain.

Elianas sat
alone on the bottom step, head hanging. For the moment he had
removed himself from the fray.

Reactions were
varied.

“I don’t see a
problem,” Rose said first.

“How can it be
as simple as that? Truth creates a path, always has, but this is
too simple,” Caballa said.

“Simple?”
Teighlar snorted.

“Truth?” Saska
whispered. “We lie even to ourselves.”

Torrullin
flicked her a glance.

“I have
nothing hidden,” Dechend blurted.

“I prefer to
keep my truths to myself,” Maple muttered.

“Likewise,”
Teighlar agreed.

“Must we speak
aloud?” Tianoman wanted to know.

“Yes,”
according to Sabian. “When a rock rolls down a mountain slope with
no one to hear its passage, does it make a noise?”

“Yes,”
Tianoman frowned.

“Oh? Surely no
one heard it? It is the same here. If no one hears you speak, do
you actually tell the truth?”

“That makes no
sense.”

“Actually, it
does,” Teroux murmured. “Anyway, I don’t mind.” He glanced at
Torrullin. “What if we have nothing to say?”

“We all have
something to say,” Quilla murmured. “Always.”

Declan paced
at the edge of the jetty. “Unfortunately. I do not like this.”

“Everyone must
speak or no one makes it to the other side,” Sabian insisted. “The
void knows it needs create fourteen stones, for fourteen penitents
stand at its edge. If you cannot see yourself doing this, this is
the point you turn back from.”

“How?”
Tianoman asked. “The raft is gone.”

“Your choice,”
Sabian said. “Stay and swim back … or take your chances up
there.”

Tristan said,
“Which hidden truth? The one that can be shared, is embarrassing at
worst, or the one you prefer not a soul ever hear about?”

“The latter,”
Elianas whispered, head still hanging.

Tristan swore,
drawing an astonished gaze from everyone.

Torrullin
laughed. “Welcome to my dilemma.”

“And mine,”
Teighlar muttered.

“A journey
about truth, isn’t that what you said, Torrullin?” Saska
taunted.

“Are you able
to do this easily?” he demanded.

“No.”

“Then don’t
throw stones.”

Caballa was
decisive. “Well, nobody is swimming back, so we deal with it. And
we deal with it on a full stomach.” She began by snapping a fire on
and filling a pot with water. “Come, haul out the supplies.”

Torrullin eyed
her. “Do you want me to create a meal?”

“No, I want to
keep my hands busy and maybe my thoughts also.” She bent over the
fire.

Tristan stared
at Caballa a while as she got busy, seemed for a few moments in
self-debate, and then took her face in his hands and leaned in to
kiss her.

As he let go,
he said, “That is so I don’t have to stand up there and reveal how
I badly want to kiss you.”

Caballa stared
up at him, her expression blank, and then busied herself with the
pot. Her hands shook.

Rose made a
disgusted snort.

Saska grinned.
“Brave, brave Tristan.”

Torrullin
laughed.

Caballa was on
her feet, glaring at him.

Tristan
stilled.

Elianas lifted
his head.

“Say it,
Caballa,” Torrullin prompted. “Say it here or say it up there.”

Saska
paled.

Tristan
remained frozen.

“Oh, god,”
Teroux murmured.

“Do I mean so
little to you?” Caballa whispered. “You laugh?”

Torrullin studied her. “For twenty-five years you removed
yourself from my presence and it included Valaris, because you
might have sensed something of me on that world. I missed you every
single day, Caballa, and told myself to be patient, you would find
a way to make your peace with the Valleur dead by my hand. Yet I
wondered, for
I
have not found a way to make my peace with that. And then I
saw you over Samuel’s body and I knew it would be all right, for
friends might be parted for many ages and remain friends. We are
friends, Caballa, seers, and once we were lovers. Do I think so
little of you? No, I think the universe of you and I hope you find
happiness with a man you love. I do not think you need a man to be
happy, and yet I know you are able to love with all of you, and if
that man is Tristan, then I say - lucky Tristan.”

She stared at
him.

He added, “It
is not me you fight, Caballa. It is yourself.”

Caballa closed
her eyes. “I am sorry I made this public.”

“Tristan is
not me,” Torrullin said. “He has not my capacity for hate. He knows
only how to love completely.”

Blindly
Caballa turned away.

Tristan
animated then, walking to the end of the jetty without looking at
anyone, where Declan relinquished the space.

You are not drawn to hate, Caballa,
Torrullin sent.

Yet I am
torn.

Go to him or
you lose any chance at a future with him.

Clearly she
thought something similar, for, with measured tread, she headed to
Tristan.

“Well, I guess
I will be supplying the meal,” Torrullin joked.

“About time,”
Teighlar grinned. He winked. “I can tell this will not be a boring
trip.”

“I could do
with boredom,” Saska muttered.

At the jetty’s
end Tristan took Caballa into his arms.

Torrullin
sighed.

“Regrets?”
Teighlar murmured.

“That never
began.”

“Saska does
not mind?”

“Saska wishes
her husband rather chose Caballa than his other choices,” Saska
said. “Stop digging, Teighlar.”

“Forgive me,
my Lady.”

Torrullin
smiled. “Really?”

“Yes, really.
Caballa would pull you straight,” Saska said.

“Interesting.”

“Oh, bugger
off.” She pointed at the fire. “Get the food going.”

Elianas
laughed.

The light in
the cavern did not diminish with the fire, nor were other ploys
successful.

It was endless
day, and it exhausted.

Tianoman
suggested they sleep on the ledge where dark would aid rest.
Reluctantly this was agreed to and they headed up. Once there,
Sabian was for beginning the process of crossing the void, but the
majority overruled him.

They slept,
and again Elianas curled into Torrullin’s back. This time Torrullin
was too weary to stay awake, and, besides, he found the warmth at
his back comforting. Whether Elianas availed himself to skin during
the ‘night’ he could not tell when they awakened.

Again Elianas
was up first.

Breakfast was
a mug of coffee; tension was rife.

With
everything packed, they stood at the edge.

Sabian stepped
off and his ellipse was there for him. He gestured the others on,
which they did with a variety of emotions, some obvious, some
hidden.

They faced the
depthless void.

Sabian said
“Anyone?”

Teroux stepped
forward. “The only truth I keep hidden is the desire to bring my
father back together again.”

Torrullin
sighed inwardly. Teroux knew about Tannil’s scattered soul.

A new ellipse
rose up, lit faintly amber. Teroux stepped onto it and gradually
the others followed. The pull of the void was a pervasive presence,
unending gravity sucking at feet. Nerve ends tingled.

“Teroux?”
Torrullin called.

“It’s all
right, Torrullin. I know he scattered and I know why. One day I
hope to find a way to fix him.”

Torrullin did
not say there was no way to do so; hope was a powerful force. One
day, before it became disappointment, he would tell Teroux to move
on from this wish.

Tianoman was
next, emboldened as he was by his cousin’s bravery. “I wish I could
tear Digilan apart and free my father.”

An ellipse
rose up and they stepped over. The two cousins shrugged at one
another.

Rose was next,
drawing shaky breaths. “I never told anyone this, never. Here, with
all of you feeling like family to me, I wish to share. I was raped
… by my father.” She closed her eyes. “This is why I hate men.”

A green
ellipse rose and she stepped over. Teroux locked gazes with
Tristan. Rose, raped? She was not playing the inadvertent games of
the innocent? Rose was bent on avenging herself on all men?

Caballa
stepped over and took Rose into her arms. “Now the healing begins,
my dear,” she murmured as Rose started to sob.

Torrullin
pinched the bridge of his nose. Dear god, how bad would this get?
With the others he stepped over.

The ledge was
already lost to darkness and they had a far way to go.

Saska moved to
the front and Torrullin held his breath. Looking back, she found
him. “I not only caused the death of your child by neglect, I
wished it dead.”

She jerked
away as a blue ellipse rose, and stepped over.

Torrullin
growled and would have launched himself at her throat had not
Elianas held him back.

“No, not like
this.”

Torrullin drew
up, shrugging the man off. He stepped over last to put as many
bodies between him and Saska as was possible. She was stoic, and
did not look his way.

Dechend was
calm as he spoke. “I have always known this abyss existed.”

Teighlar
snorted. “That is your hidden truth?”

“What else is
there, my Lord?”

Teighlar
smiled. “You are a good man, Dechend.”

Dechend
inclined his head and found his ellipse before him. They all
stepped over.

Then the
process stalled.

Sabian
exhorted, “Come on, we are getting closer!”

Caballa moved
forward. “The truth is I cannot tell where my truth lies.”

“That is not
good enough,” Sabian snapped.

No ellipse
rose.

Caballa
sighed. “The truth is I love Tristan.”

“Gods,”
Tristan said, moving forward.

He stood
beside Caballa as they waited. Was she testing herself or was she
telling the truth?

No ellipse
rose.

Tristan
groaned.

Torrullin
closed his eyes and prayed.

“I love
Torrullin.”

Absolute
silence.

But no ellipse
rose.

“I am lost!”
she wailed.

A white
ellipse rose.

“No,” she
whispered and took Tristan’s hand as he helped her over. She was
quiet after that. She would not look directly at either man named
in her quest for a definitive answer.

A muscle
twitched in Tristan’s cheek.

Maple was
next. “I slept with and murdered my sister.” With an expressionless
face he stepped over. His ellipse was swift in arriving.