The Mammoth Book of Erotic Confessions (45 page)

And as I stepped out of his office, still naked with all my clothes across my arm, I could only reflect that just occasionally there were one or two advantages in being married to the Boss.

Nels, Cleath

I met Ed in the seventh grade in 1987. He and I got along great from the start. We were a lot alike. We were both not popular and we were both picked on in junior school. I
didn’t discover that I was bisexual until I was twenty-four. I came out to all of my closest friends. But never in my wildest dreams did I ever think Ed was bisexual too.

A few times, Ed and I watched adult videos together but it never led to anything, not even masturbation. I mean, sure, we talked about it a few times but we never ever thought that what we do
every so often now we would do then. And when it first happened, I was as nervous as a guy could get. Ed and I knew what was going to happen on that warm night in April 2004 but neither of us
talked about it.

After several hours of boring chat, we were both anxious to watch the DVDs I brought with me. So, he loaded up the DVD program on his computer and I handed him the disk. He popped it into his
drive and it started playing. I told him to forward a few chapters into the disk to get to the good part. We watched for a little bit. Then I made my first move. I unzipped my pants. Ed looked over
at me a little embarrassed. I pushed my pants down a little, not really exposing anything. I put my hand inside my underwear.

“Ed, don’t be embarrassed. It’s OK to look,” I said.

He looked over at me and then started unzipping his own pants. I was kind of nervous because I had never seen him in anything less than a pair of shorts. More than that, I was excited. Anyone
who knows me well knows that I love to play with my cock. I do it at least once a day, unless it’s impossible to do so. And I had not played with myself in front of anyone in a while so this
was exciting to me. Most of the time I ended up in my room giving myself an arousing hand job.

I had, by this point, pulled my pants down to my knees along with my underwear. He had just unzipped his pants and had a hand inside. I could tell he was a lot more nervous than I was. I am a
lot more uninhibited than he is. I was giving myself a fantastic hand job while we both watched the DVD on the screen in front of us. In no time at all, I was coming all over my hands. I quickly
zipped up my pants and left the room so Ed could finish. I was kind of embarrassed because that was the first time we had ever done anything sexual together.

I went into the bathroom to wash my hands while Ed finished up. Then we went upstairs so he could drive me home. In the car I told him it was a lot of fun and I would like to do it again
sometime soon. He agreed that it was fun and that we should do it again. I shook his hand and went into my house.

That night a lot of things were swirling in my head. I knew I wasn’t romantically interested in Ed, I mean he is one of my oldest and dearest friends. But, suddenly in less than
twenty-four hours, I was sexually interested in him. The next day I called him and told him that I had had a really good time playing with myself in front of him. He said the same thing. I told him
my mom would be out of the house that coming Sunday evening and that I wanted him to come over for some more fun.

Then I asked him
the
question: “How do you feel about me sucking your dick?”

“I’m not sure. I’ll think about it.”

“I promise you that I’ll be good.”

“All right, I’ll consider it.”

That Sunday came and I was a little nervous. Ed came over and I put a long six-hour adult video into the VCR. We sat and talked for a while, glancing at the screen. We both knew what the other
was thinking but neither of us spoke about it. Finally after about three-quarters of an hour talking about other stuff, I made my move. I pulled down and took off my pants and underwear so that I
was sitting on the sofa next to him with nothing on but a shirt. I sat next to him for a moment or two, slowly getting harder and harder.

“I guess I should take off my clothes too,” Ed said as he stood up and took off all of his clothes.

This was the very first time I had ever seen Ed completely naked and when I got my first glimpse of his ass I got as hard as a fucking rock. He turned around and saw my hard cock and smiled at
me. We both sat back down on the sofa and began slowly stroking our own cocks, not touching each other yet. We continued to watch the video and slowly stroked our own cocks but we never touched
each other. I was a little nervous but also excited.

After about ten minutes of us doing this, I made my move. I slid over next to him and put my hand on his cock. He looked at me and smiled a little bit. I slowly stroked his cock. I could tell
that he liked what I was doing. Then I made my big move.

Keep in mind that because of some bad relationships he had had in the past, he was a virgin. Not even a hand job from another person. I felt so bad for the guy that I just wanted to make him
feel good. And I knew just how to go about making him feel very, very good.

I leaned down and took his hard cock into my mouth. The sensation took Ed off guard. He didn’t quite know what to think. I mean, I had sucked cock before but this guy was one of my best
friends. This was a whole new thing for me. Plus, he had the biggest cock I have ever sucked. But, it went down smooth. It was wonderful.

The moan Ed let out was music to my ears. I could tell he was in heaven when I was sucking his cock. I sucked on it like an old pro, which I guess I sort of am. I was loving his cock in my
mouth. It was wonderful.

I took his cock out of my mouth and started jacking him off fast and furious. I wanted Ed to come and come badly. And that he did. He shot out a load the likes of which I had never ever seen
before. He came all over my hand and then some. Ed was in ecstasy. I could easily tell.

After he came and calmed down from his eruption, it was time to get me off. He stroked my cock like a man possessed. I never had a hand job like that before. It was great. I came in no time. I
was so turned on that I came in less than two minutes.

We cleaned ourselves up and got dressed. A little while later, Ed went home. That was not the end of our fun. Oh hell, no. That was only the beginning.

About a month later, Ed called me and wanted to get together again. I was more than eager to oblige him. A few weeks before, I had purchased a blow-up doll from an online catalogue and I had had
some fun with it but I wanted to share her with Ed. So, Ed came over that Friday night.

After about an hour I pulled out the blow-up doll. Ed was eager to get at her. So, I inflated her. Ed took off his clothes. My cock was as hard as a rock. He put some lube on his cock, lay down
on the sofa in my bedroom and slammed his cock into the doll.

Then I made my big move. I lubed up my cock and while Ed fucked my doll, I slid my cock into his ass. His ass felt so good that I came in no time at all. I pumped his asshole like a man
possessed. I slid my cock out of his ass and came all over his gorgeous cheeks. I was mesmerized. I watched in amazement while Ed fucked my doll. I got hard a few minutes later. I played with
myself and came on Ed’s ass one more time before he came.

We continued to suck each other and stroke each other off over the next few months. About a month ago, my girlfriend was out of town so I invited Ed over. He came over around nine o’clock.
We bullshitted for a while. Then we took our clothes off. We then climbed into bed. I kissed him all over his neck, then I worked over his nipples. I made my way down to his cock. I sucked his big
delicious cock for all it was worth. While I was sucking him, I worked over his nipples with my fingers.

You just have to see Ed’s cock to believe it. It’s nine inches long and has a nice thickness to it. It just looks like it was made to be sucked. And I love sucking it. It’s
great.

I continued to suck Ed for several more minutes. When he came, I held on to his cock with my mouth. I took every bit of his come down my throat without one single drop leaving my mouth. That was
the very first time I ever swallowed someone’s load and I really liked it.

A few months later, I moved back into my mom’s house for a while. While living there, I sucked Ed off in my mom’s backyard late at night a few times. It was so nice to suck his cock
with the cool breeze blowing on my naked ass. That was super hot.

Ed and I plan to get together for more sex in the future. It’s so fun to suck him off and come on his ass. Wow!

Chrissy, Newcastle

The sign in the shop says
WE ALWAYS PROSECUTE SHOPPLIFTERS
but it isn’t entirely true. The way I have it as manager is I only prosecute the women
who deserve it – and not the ones whose panties I want to sniff.

It might seem pretty outrageous for the manager of a fashion store to let people off the hook when they’ve been caught stealing, but the truth is we have so many and, to be honest, the
amount of time it sometimes takes to get the police in and start the whole process isn’t worth it. Usually the policy, with first-time offenders anyway, is to bring them to the
manager’s office, take our things back and tell the culprit in no uncertain terms that if we ever even see them in the shop again we will call the police.

Of course there are some who you have to prosecute: the hardliners, the ones who operate as part of a gang, who aren’t stealing for themselves but to order. You know who they are as they
go for the more expensive stuff, and in bulk. Then we always call the cops in and release the closed circuit TV images to other stores in the area.

No, what I’m talking about are the small-timers. It sometimes isn’t worth prosecuting them as they are scared. Just occasionally you even feel a little sorry for them. Plus, there
are those whose panties I want to sniff and I wouldn’t want to prosecute them at all.

I sometimes can’t believe I am the way I am. I am a forty-three-year-old respectable married woman and have been in retailing for years. I think head office regard me as one of their
better local managers and have tried to get me to apply for jobs like regional manager. It would be good money no doubt but a lot more pressure too. I would also have to uproot from Tyne-side and,
more than anything, I wouldn’t have the chance to practise my peculiar fetish.

It’s a straightforward fetish in that I sniff other women’s knickers. I know there are men who do it but what’s sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander, and I guess there
are more women like me out there who can’t get enough of a noseful of the heady aroma from another’s woman’s crotch. I haven’t met any females who admit to doing this but I
can’t be alone in getting off on the smell of another pussy, but that doesn’t worry me. I get what I need whenever I can get it and I’m not into sharing experiences.

Because fashion is everything in a lively working city like this we get a lot of young women in our shop. Most of them are attractive even if the tendency these days seems to be they carry a bit
more weight than they should. Well, I’m not going to make love to them so it hardly matters how they look. It’s what they secrete between their legs that I’m after.

Usually we get an alert if there are shoplifters nearby, calls from other shops and so on. It’s a pretty good network, though my fear is if there’s someone wandering round stealing
from other places they will get nabbed before they get to my store. I want to be the one who dresses them down, literally, in my office.

Take the other day, for example. We got a call from a fashion store that there was a young woman – blond, age twenty or so, about five foot three with a red coat – who was suspected
of trying to take something without paying from a rival shop. So we were ready. Sure enough the girl came into our shop and did what most amateur thieves do: she looked guilty and wandered
aimlessly back and forth, just as much concerned with looking over her shoulder and checking where the staff were than looking at the clothes. Believe me you don’t have to be an expert in
body language to see what’s on their minds.

This woman – I’ll call her Carol as that was the name she gave me when I spoke to her later – hadn’t got a bag, which is the way a lot of this is done. I won’t give
any trade secrets away but it’s obvious that the best way would be to drop something into a bag and slide out of the shop. But Carol didn’t work that way.

She was walking between the racks of dresses, half looking at them and glancing round. You have to be careful as sometimes people are looking for a friend, or are simply just
“butterfly” lookers, who alight on one thing and then move to another quickly without any seeming reason. But Carol here was someone who ostensibly was a customer who tried something on
and didn’t want it, but she would have hidden something under her coat. She would take another dress to the changing room and, under the pretext of trying on the obvious choice, would put the
stolen item on under her coat. When she emerged from the changing room she would hand back the dress she didn’t want and leave the store.

I was watching her on the TV screens in my office. Carol picked up not one but three tops and bundled them under her coat. She looked, almost, as if she were pregnant. Then she went to the
underwear section and did the same with a couple of bras. Finally she selected a plain dress, almost without looking at it, and went to check it into the changing room.

When she came out she had her red coat buttoned up, handed over the unwanted dress, which didn’t even look her size, and headed for the door. Two of my staff followed her out and onto the
street, inviting her to come back in to my office. “Just to clear things up,” as they always say.

Poor Carol looked utterly distraught. The amateurs usually do look devastated as they think that once they are on the street they have got away with it. The professionals always look hard or
disinterested but then they have usually spirited the items away to someone else, and as they know where the cameras are we rarely get to see to whom they hand off to. Anyway, Carol was sat in my
office and she was crying, saying there must be some mistake, that she’s a good girl.