The Love Series Complete Box Set (133 page)

Chapter Ten

February 1, 2013

“What the hell am I doing?” I kill the ignition on the car and huff at no one in particular. “Calm down. It’s just dinner and birthday cake,” I coach myself out of the car and up the small walkway to Joe’s house. With my hand an inch away from the door, I take a deep breath and try my best to shake away any unease I’m feeling.

Before I can even knock, the door opens.

“Hey, Lucy.” My God, his voice, it does things to me.

“Hi, Evan,” I choke out as my words get caught in my throat.

“Come in. Let me take your coat.” Evan extends his hand to the side, letting me walk past him. The scent of his cologne fills my senses—clean and kind of citrusy, but purely male. As he slides my jacket off my shoulders, his thumbs graze my neck and shoulders—unintentionally I’m sure. But the shivers that race across my skin are there nonetheless.

“Can I get you a drink?” he offers politely, a casual grin pulling at his lips.

“Sure. Let me come in and help you.” I follow behind him into the kitchen. I didn’t notice at the grocery store earlier, since he was wearing a bulky winter coat, but his broad shoulders are muscled and strong. His biceps fill the sleeves of his navy-blue FDNY t-shirt. And those jeans, well, they should be illegal—snug in all the right places. And call me crazy, but the dish towel casually draped over his shoulder, because he’s busy cooking for his brother, makes him look even more delicious than any amount of tight denim ever will.

“Red or white?”

“Huh . . . what . . . oh, wine? Red please.” He pulls down a glass and opens the bottle with ease before sliding the glass over to me across the island countertop between us.

“Where’s Joe and Katie?” Having spent the last few minutes focusing entirely on Evan, I’m just now realizing that the house is empty.

“She took Joe out shopping for his birthday present. They should be back soon.” Turning away from me, he squats down to check whatever is in the oven.

I definitely do not check out his tight ass.

“Smells amazing. What are you making?” I take a sip of my wine and twirl the stem between my fingers.

“Just a roast and some potatoes. Nothing too special.” He drags the towel off his shoulders and wipes his hands.

“Well, it beats a frozen dinner or take-out.”

“Yeah, I saw those in your basket earlier. You don’t cook much then, huh?” He pulls out some lettuce, tomatoes and cucumbers for a salad. That I can help with. I grab a knife from the block on the counter, stand next to him and start cutting the tomato.

“Nah. I mean, now that Melanie is back at school, there isn’t anyone to cook for.”

“You mean it’s just you?” There’s surprise and a touch of misunderstanding in his voice.

“Yeah, Maddy just moved in with Reid, so who else would there be?” I’m confused by his tone.

“Nothing, forget it.” He dismisses, but all I’m left with is the idea that he thought there was someone else in my life.

A touch of tension fills the space between us. Then, I think back to exactly what was in my shopping basket earlier.

“The soap? That’s what made you think I’m not alone.” His knife stops mid-slice and he turns to me.

“Uh, yeah. I mean unless you secretly like to smell like a man, I can’t imagine another reason.”

My cheeks turn pink, both at being caught buying men’s soap and at his misunderstanding of it. Call me crazy, but he seems a little disappointed at the prospect of me having a man in my life.

“It was my husband’s soap.” I put my knife down and sprinkle the chopped tomatoes on top of the salad.

“Was?”

Sipping my wine, I take in the mix of emotions on Evan’s rugged face. Confusion and concern are mixed with the smallest hint of relief. That last piece of information makes me smile around the rim of my glass.

“Yes, was. Jimmy passed away eighteen years ago. It’s been just me ever since.”

“Oh.” He continues his slicing and chopping, seemingly uncomfortable with what I’ve told him.

After a few long moments of salad making go by, the oven-timer beeps. Evan slides on some oven mitts and takes the roast out.

“Wow, Evan. That looks amazing. I haven’t had a home-cooked meal like this is forever.” I hope that my compliments, which are not empty at all, help to ease some of the awkwardness.

After he places the roast on a serving tray and tents it with some foil, he leans back against the counter, extending his legs in front of him and crossing them at the ankles. Taking a healthy swallow of his beer, I watch the muscles of his neck move, more than a little interested. Everything about him is strong and muscled; watching him move to put the beer down on the counter is like watching a work of art in motion. I let my eyes linger on his hands for a moment as they wrap tightly around the neck of his beer bottle. Briefly, I imagine what those rough and calloused fingers would feel like on my skin.

“You said ever since. You mean in all that time you never got remarried or anything like that? That there’s really no one right now?” His words have suddenly taken on an accusatory tone.

“Why would I lie? No, I never got remarried.” I take another sip of my wine, a little liquid courage before revealing my little secret. “I was getting the soap because I was feeling lonely, okay? It reminds me of him, makes me feel better, so every now and then, I buy his soap.” Jerk. I chug back the last large gulp of my wine and with unsteady hands struggle to remove the cork wedged in the top of the opened bottle of wine.

Evan is by my side in an instant. He puts his hand at the small of my back, the heat permeating through the thin fabric of my blouse. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be an ass.” He uncorks the bottle with ease. “I’ve been lied to before.” He scrubs a hand over his face as his admission falls from his mouth. “And, it was more about me not believing that you’ve been alone all this time than thinking that you were lying to me about a bar of soap.” He pours my wine for me, and when I take it from his hand, our fingers meet for an instant. Mine graze over his, heat passing between us. He shifts his finger from under mine and gently rubs it across mine, which was just on top of his. It’s a slight movement, but it’s enough to set loose a swarm of butterflies in my belly.

Needing to redirect the conversation, I ask what else is for dinner. I get lost in the smooth yet gruff lull of his voice. The animated way in which he talks about cooking is hypnotizing. It’s also pretty sweet of him to want to do all of this for his brother.

When he pulls the bubbling-over-with-cheesy-goodness potatoes out of the oven, my stomach actually grumbles aloud. “You’re putting my Lean Cuisine’s to shame.”

“I can’t believe you eat that garbage,” he scoffs as he pulls some plates down from the cabinet.

“One,” I hold up a finger as I begin my counting off, “like I said, it’s just me so all of the extra food would go to waste. Two, I can’t cook like this.” I tip my chin at the spread he’s laid out before us. “And three, I suck at cooking.” The last one gets a loud laugh out of him and me too.

“Maybe I could teach you to cook one day.” The laughter falls to silence as I consider his offer. Something tells me he would be a wonderful teacher. But something also tells me it would be more than dangerous—in a good way—to be in a room as small as a kitchen with Evan for more than a few minutes.

Just like now.

Linda’s words about giving myself a chance at happiness ring loudly in my ear.

“I’d like that,” I mutter quickly as I take another sip of wine. “I go shopping every Friday night on my way home from work. We could go next week.”

I’m not sure if it’s Katie and Joe coming through the front door that makes him answer quickly, but the abrupt “yes” that falls from his lips surprises me.

I feel like a giddy teenager. I have a date. Can you call this a date? Or is it just a nice guy doing a lame old maid a favor?

Joe and Katie’s playful bickering disrupts my thoughts. “I’m never letting you drive again.”

“I am not a bad driver,” Katie defends as Joe gives her the parental death-ray stare. I nearly spit out my wine. I’ve given Melanie the same look many times.

“Wow, Uncle Ev, this looks amazing.” Evan glows at the compliment. His smile reaches his grey eyes as deep laugh lines crinkle in the corners.

He catches me staring and I smile back at him; an exchange of some kind passes between us.

The doorbell rings and Katie lets Maddy and Reid in. Maddy hugs me tightly when she sees me. “We were so happy when Katie called today to tell us you were coming.” Maddy wraps her arm around my waist, as if she’s missed me in the few days since she’s moved out of my home. I’ve missed her too, but seeing the way Reid watches her every movement, the way his eyes light as she talks, filling me in on her most recent doctor’s appointment, I know she’s in the right place.

“Reid, you look so grown up. A shirt and tie works nicely for you.” I walk over to him and give him a hug and a quick kiss on the cheek.

“Thanks.” He loosens the knot at his neck and drapes his suit jacket over the back of a chair. “It’s taking some getting used to, but it’s not too bad.”

Joe grabs a few beers out of the fridge and hands one to Reid. “You think you’ll be there long term, son?”

“I’m not sure, Joe. Dylan said there’s a possibility the internship could turn into a full-time spot, but I guess I’ll just have to wait and see. But even if I don’t end up staying there, it’s definitely what I want to do with my career.” Maddy watches him talk about his job with a bright smile pulling at her lips. He just started working at a counseling center with the Gay-Straight Alliance with Dylan, a long-lost childhood friend with whom he’s only been reacquainted.

“That’s great, Reid. Really great. Your mom would be real proud.” Joe chugs back a few sips of beer and Reid joins in doing the same, both struggling with their raw emotions.

Katie breaks the sadness by delegating tasks. Setting the table, carrying out the food, filling drinks—the girl is in command. Just as I knew it would be, the food is delicious. We all chat and laugh through the meal. Evan occasionally ribs on his brother for turning the big five—oh.

Other than holidays, I can’t remember the last time I was surrounded by this many people for meals. It’s odd how just the other day I was complaining about having no one around and now, here I am, surrounded by some really amazing people.

We all sing Joe “Happy Birthday” and he opens a few presents. Katie got him some new shirts earlier when they went out, knowing he wouldn’t get them unless she
made
him go. Maddy and Reid got him a gift certificate to a local sporting goods store. Joe enrolled him in a Beer of the Month club. When I slide a card over to him, Evan gives me an odd look.

“You didn’t have to get me anything, Lucy,” Joe protests as he takes the card from me.

“It’s not much, but it’s your birthday, so of course I had to get you something.”

“Well, thank you.” Joe grins as he pulls out the Over the Hill lottery tickets. It was more about the card and offering him someone to talk to if he ever needed it; the lottery tickets were just an afterthought.

Evan, who is sitting next to me, leans over and whispers in my ear, “That was really thoughtful of you.” His hot breath on my ear sets those damn butterflies swirling in my belly again. Blood pounds in my ears and my cheeks heat yet again. Feeling my face flush with heat, I quickly scan around the table, making sure that no one else has seen us. Maddy winks at me and smiles coyly; so much for going unnoticed

After the cake is all done, Maddy and Reid decide to head home and Katie goes out for the night to meet up with some friends. Joe tries to help clean up, but Evan refuses, telling him that it’s his birthday and that he should go into the living room and relax. Joe, who looks more than a little drained, takes Evan up on the offer. Flopping down into his recliner, he clicks through the channels and enjoys another beer.

I help clear the rest of the dishes and join Evan in the kitchen. He cooked, so the least I can do is help clean.

It doesn’t have anything to do with wanting to spend a little more time with him.

Alone.

Nope, not at all.

“You wash and I’ll dry?” I offer as I grab the dishtowel from his shoulder.

“Sure.” He smirks at me, but keeps his attention on the mound of dishes before him.

Now that we’re alone again, I can ask him something that’s been on my mind since he told me about his retirement earlier at the grocery store. “How’s your shoulder?”

“What?” He looks over at me, as if the words I’ve just spoken were in another language.

“Your shoulder. At Becca’s funeral, you said you were on leave because of a shoulder injury, and then the next time I see you, you’re retired.”

“I didn’t exactly plan on seeing you again.” His words gut me in a way I wasn’t expecting. He didn’t think he’d see me, so he lied?

“Oh.” I let the sound of the water swishing around fill the air, choosing to bite back my hurt.

He hands me the last of the dishes and pulls another towel from the small drawer to his side. After he dries his hands, he leans back against the counter, crossing his arms over his broad chest. There is absolutely nothing about the way Evan looks that would ever indicate that he’s retired.