The Lotus Effect (Rise Of The Ardent) (16 page)

“No, I’m the one who should be sorry.” He dropped his fingers from my arm, slowly, like he didn’t realize he had put them there. “We’re in this predicament together and it doesn’t help you trust me if I keep sneaking out like I do,” he said, sincerely, I thought. “How about I take you with me tonight? With both suits completed, I think you deserve a little break, and a chance to get some . . .” He paused before he emphasized the next part, “
fresh air
.”

I frowned at him, but slowly nodded my agreement. There was a glint in his eyes that made me extremely curious. The only way to find out was to forget my aching muscles and agree to go with him.

“Fair enough. But first let me show you what I accomplished today,” I said cautiously, wanting to break the news to him gently. “I not only have my suit completed, but also—my weapons.”

Xander stopped what he was doing and faced me. “You’ve finished? Already?” His left eyebrow rose as though he didn’t believe me.

“
Yes, I’ve
finished
.
And may I just say how pleased I am by your evident faith in me?”

Xander made a face. “Don’t take it personally. Especially if I decide to take over and alter any . . . inconsistencies. I know how much your pride means to you, but this isn’t a game, Lily.”

“The Barrage has never been a game to me,
Xander
.”
Did he think me a complete idiot?
With joking mood gone, I sighed. “Wait here,” I told him, and hurried to retrieve my newly forged battle axes.

I was angry at the way he treated me—like I was a fragile porcelain doll that constantly teetered on the edge of internal collapse. Here I was training every day, sweating and losing sleep over these axes, my fingers bloodied and bruised . . . and he thought I took it as only a
game
? A way to bolster my pride?

The next thing I knew, I had a white knuckled grip on the axes’ handles and was swiftly walking back towards him with malicious intent glowing in my eyes. It angered me even more when I saw that my approach didn’t even entice a reaction out of him. He simply stood there, arched his eyebrow at me as if finding my mood amusing.

He then frowned, realizing what I was about to do. And more specifically—what I was holding.

So much for breaking the news to him gently.

With a burst of pent-up passion that needed immediate release, I hurled one axe after the other, straight at the chalkboard—the one directly behind his head.

With two very satisfying thuds, the axes landed cleanly into the board, one even lodging itself so deep I knew its edge protruded from behind.

I stood with wide, wild eyes. The axes were even more efficient than I’d hoped—their blades sang unbelievably true.

Xander too, no longer held the inquisitive and amused look on his face. In fact he had not even moved from his position, did not even flinch. His eyes though, drilled into mine.

His lips parted and his forehead creased. “Those were . . .
not
, what I was expecting,” he said slowly.

Was he angry? Or proud? I couldn’t tell. He took a few steps towards me and away from the chalkboard. “You’re planning to dual wield
axes
?” he said guardedly. Then he shook his head and let loose. Anger. Yes, it was anger that I sensed.

“Are you
insane
? Of all the weapons, you choose the most cumbersome of the lot, geared towards someone who possesses brute strength. I expected . . .” He sighed, running his hand through his hair and held on as though it would anchor him to some distant calm and collective state.

“
What
?” I demanded. “You expected something that everyone else counts on a girl of my stature to wield, correct? Then I chose perfectly for no one will see them coming.” I steeled myself, ready to fight to convince him. “This will be to my advantage.”

“Really? You think so?” He nodded. “Let’s see if you can even pry them from the chalkboard. Go ahead, Lily. Show me what you’ve got.” He gestured to the board behind him, taunting me.

I folded my arms.

“
Bones
, Lily. Couldn’t have asked for a second opinion?”

 
“I get it. You don’t approve. I, however, can promise that I will train with them every single day that we have left. I can also promise that I will
not
be changing weapons.” I took a step closer. “The axes are mine.”

Xander sighed, shaking his head. “Fine. Have it your way. But I warn you, they are difficult to master.”

He stalled and looked at me, his demeanor changing back into one of pride. “They however look . . . exceptional. I’m impressed,” he said, nodding once in approval. I even saw a wan smile tug at the corner of his lips.

“I’ll find you later, after sunset,” he said suddenly, bringing me back to the issue of his absences. “Wear your boots and something that can get wet,” he added before he walked out of the room’s open hanger and down the hallway—out of sight. Leaving me alone to face the cloud of my own fizzling anger—and two very wedged axes in need of removal.

~

My mouth moved in a mad fashion as I finished stuffing my face with the rice and vegetable medley I had pulled together. Using so much energy throughout the past two weeks had dramatically increased my appetite. I hoped I would still be able to squeeze myself into my armor after gorging myself sleepy. Corsets, mech suits, armor—they’re not that much different after all. Except that corsets damage while armor protects.

“I’m glad your appetite has increased. I was becoming worried.”

Startled, I shot my hand out with fork attached, slinging rice across the table and floor.

“Worried you’d simply crumple beneath the weight of your armor.”

“You’ve got to stop sneaking up on me like that!” I cried to Xander who now stood behind me. Frantically, I wiped at the stray rice that I knew clung to the corners of my mouth.

Xander grinned as he slid out the chair next to me. “One day your senses will be so attuned to the world around you, even I, will not be able to sneak up on
you
.”

I huffed as gracefully as I could in response.

Xander practically appeared and disappeared in a vapor of smoke: a shadow you may sense lingering just outside the corner of your eye. The one you can never manage to catch sight of.

Xander sat, stretching his legs beneath the table. We both were silent for a moment before I once again picked up my fork and tried to retain some of my lost dignity. The kitchen was eerily quiet, until thankfully, a rhythmic humming started up from the ice chest.

“How is it that you are handling everything so well?” Xander asked quietly. He splayed his hands across the table, his fingers finding the small grooves in the surface. He then turned to me, his stare persistent. “I’m not even sure I’ve heard you complain about this choice of yours. Not even once.”

I paused with fork in hand and stared blankly into the rice, finding it suddenly fascinating. I ignored his question, not because I wanted to, but because I could not rationally come up with an explanation of the torrent of feelings that swirled in my mind. I was tired and strong, hopeful and regretful all at the same time. It was as if the emotions were ripping me apart from the inside, battling for their own right of dominance and not excepting coexistence.

Even though I was frightened—not so much for my future anymore—but for the future of City Prosper, I found that there was an inner drive inside me to do my duty, to fight on the battlefield and just ‘do’ and not ‘think’. That was also a hard notion to swallow, knowing deep down that I didn’t have a chance against the other fighters.

Xander noticed my hesitation. “If it’s worth anything,” he said, “I’m impressed by your progress so far. You’re tougher than you look.” He leaned forward, towards the table’s edge. “I know I’ve said this before . . . that I didn’t want you to rely on my presence out there, but no matter what, I will be there for you. As your partner: I will fight by your side, I will die by your side if it comes to that.” His eyes were drawn to the groove beneath his fingers, one that appeared to have been seared into the wood by flame. “While I still breathe, you will have my protection.”

I lifted my eyes, meeting his in what I hoped was a thoughtful look, but again I couldn’t find the right words to accompany my feelings.

Xander reached forward and squeezed my hand reassuringly in understanding. We both looked to our hands then, our eyes searching briefly.

Xander cleared his throat and removed his hand from mine. He smiled, attempting to change the somber and now, strange, air between us. “Come on, Ma’lady Battle-Axe.” He slapped the side of my cheek playfully, making me almost sputter rice from my mouth. “If I do recall, you’re not only a force to reckon with, but also one whose curiosity reaches no limits.”

I stared at him confused—as though
he
was the one who’d gone completely mad.

“Oh! Yes,” I said almost too loudly, nodding as our earlier conversation came back to me. “You were going to take me somewhere. Right.
Tonight
?”

He nodded and grinned, raising his eyebrow at my expense, his way of teasing me.

“Unless you are feeling ill, we can . . .” He reached up to mockingly test the temperature of my forehead.

I swatted his hand away. “Stop it. I didn’t forget, I just . . . find you confusing at times,” I said, exasperated. “Let me change and I’ll meet you out front.”

I began hurriedly cleaning the table before me, unused to, but loving the fact no one reprimanded me for doing so.

“We’re not going out the front entrance,” Xander corrected with that mysterious look to his eyes.

“Meet me in the training yard.”

Chapter 15

A Place of Myth ~ Whispered Rumors

The silver moon, like a newly stamped coin of the Council’s making, shone brilliantly in the sky before me. A sight which never ceased to take my breath away.

After I haphazardly threw my hooded jacket around me and laced my boots—I found Xander in the furthest part of the training yard, standing with his back turned beneath an errant sliver of moonlight.

Xander turned, hefting something onto his back. I couldn’t make out what exactly it was that he held while I stood in the doorway so I hastened across the already cooling sand. It was still damp, compacted together from an earlier rainstorm, causing it to crunch beneath my boots.

“I’m thinking tonight is not the best of nights to be doing this,” he called out to me as I approached.

“To be doing what?” I asked quickly, trying to dispel the urgent disappointment that edged its way to the surface of my chest.

He fingers deftly maneuvered over straps which lay flat against his shoulders, cinching them tightly into place. He stepped back so that only a small beam of moonlight cascaded over his face, the rest of his body shrouded in darkness. “The cloud coverage isn’t what I had hoped. I’m sorry, but it’s too risky. Lily—especially with you in tow this time.”

“Cloud coverage? What are you talking about?” Whatever he had in mind had made me hopeful. I didn’t want him to back out before I even understood what was going on.

To answer my question Xander turned, letting the moonlight shine openly upon his back. My eyes widened as a jet-pack with mechanical intricacies that I’d never seen the likes of before, gleamed in front of me.

“It runs off fuel that I harvest from the Gardenia flower in my hydroponics garden,” he stated. “It doesn’t matter.” He waved his hand absently and stepped towards me. “I’m sorry—I got your hopes up, but tonight I must go alone. It’s too dangerous for the both of us.”

 
“What?
Don’t even
think
you’re going anywhere without me.
” I cringed, knowing I sounded like a whining child. “I’m flattered by your chivalrous want to ‘protect’ me,” I threw the word back at him. “but honestly, what could possibly be more dangerous than the Barrage?”

“Plenty,” he replied. His face a mask I couldn’t decipher.

He tossed over a harness which I had to grab at awkwardly before it would’ve hit the sand. “Put it on. The triangle goes in front and make sure it’s secure along the sides—”

“—
Wait
. You’re letting me come along after all?” I said, scarcely able to contain my eagerness. I so badly wanted to know what Xander was up to.

Xander sighed and nodded, pointing to the harness he had just thrown to me.

I ran my fingers across the straps, finding the metal rings and holding it above my head as I tried to decipher where exactly this ‘triangle’ was supposed to be. Noticing that I was taking more time to adjust the harness than I should, Xander stepped over, ignoring my irked look.

“I’m not going to let pride be your downfall,” he reprimanded lightly. He opened the harness and held it low for me to step into. Once he jostled it over my trousers, he began securing the sides. I held my arms out by my hips and tried to not look as stiff as I felt while he silently fashioned it to me.

He reached down, tugging on the straps and walked to my rear. He held me steady as I tried to turn, finding that he was clipping another binding onto the thick golden rings which hung from the top of my shoulder’s straps. They were made of comfortable leather and covered the entirety of both my shoulders. They smelled like the workshop and a scent I could only describe as
Xander
. Oddly, like with Dex, I was mildly comforted by this smell too.

“So, I’m confused. Why is it exactly that you have a
jetpack
? Are we going on some sort of climbing adventure?” I asked, sounding like a bumbling fool. Now apprehensive, I ran my fingers across the tightly woven texture of the bindings across my chest.

“Not exactly,” he answered as he gave a final tug on my harness from behind.

Xander looked to the sky
and then I
knew
.

He handed me a pair of goggles and smiled.

Oh, bloody hell . . . .

~

Xander stood behind me as he released a small flat surface from his chest harness, which I quickly realized was to be a seat.
My
seat. He urged me to sit back against it after two metal supports fell to the ground. I did and found that I was secured after hearing a definite
click
from behind, latching me into place.

An urgent panic began to well up at the thought of being unable to move. Xander straightened then, causing my feet to dangle inches from the ground like a child’s in an oversized chair. With the push of a button, he ignited the jets.

“Xander . . . ?” I called out nervously. I gasped when I realized we were already rising and I jerked my head sideways, catching a glimpse in my peripheral of the blue fire that blazed beneath us.

“It’s too late now, Lily. Just hold tight,” he said, reaching forward to squeeze my shoulder twice before letting go. The metal supports compressed upwards and clicked into place at his side.

I gasped again at the sudden feeling of weightlessness that twinged in my stomach as he rose even higher into the night’s sky. The white mists of the clouds swirled around us like wispy fingers as we ascended, encouraging us higher.

Someone will see us. Bloody hell, someone’s going to see us!

I wasn’t sure how, but I managed to relax once the chill of the night breeze skimmed over my face and nose, sending the tendrils of hair closest to my face flying into their own furious dance. The sky smelled clean, pure. I breathed in a calming breath once Xander slowed and leveled off to a more rational pace as we drifted swiftly through the fine, but still concealing mists.

 
I reached my shaking hand out to the side and watched as the clouds drew their own designs around each of my fingers. It was such an innocent moment wrapped up in simplistic fascination that I was soon propelled into a dreamlike daze from its beauty. It made my heart swell in anticipation of the hope that could possibly one day find its way into City Prosper.

I craned my head and raised my eyes up to Xander in a silent thank you.

“You think that’s the best part?” Xander called down to me. “Then keep watching . . .”

Just at that instant—we broke forth from the clouds: an immense landscape appearing below us. In a moment of confusion, I turned, searching for the Wall and any distinguishing structures of the city.

There were neither.

Even in the blanket of nightfall I could see the shimmering surface of a small lake and tall green grasses far below reflecting in the moonlight. I jerked backwards, turning to stare at Xander almost accusingly in my shocked silence. His cheeky smile confirmed what I already knew to be true.

This was a gift beyond measure.

We were flying over the Outlands! The Outlands, a place I’d been dreaming about since I was a small child.

A place only of myth and whispered rumors.

I grabbed at the edges of my goggles, removing them quickly and resting them upon my neck—I didn’t want anything to obstruct this view. Craning my head again, I looked back at Xander with wide eyes, knowing that a simple ‘thank you’ would never be enough.

Wetness cascaded across my cheek, chilling a narrowed path to my chin. Reaching up, I was surprised to feel that it was neither caused from moisture in the clouds nor by wind. Using the heel of my hand, I rubbed it away quickly, and turned my attention to the landscape blurring beneath me.

I hardly had time to process what was happening before I felt an unusual flutter in my stomach.

Xander was lowering us.

What I saw before me made my breath hitch and my heart skip a beat. As though time stood still, we floated over the things I had always longed to see. I knew instantly what they were, as though they were a part of my very own soul.

The trees.

I knew now they did both; they did billow and stand firm against the currents of the wind.

~

Xander flew us close enough to the canopy that I could almost skim my fingers over the lively branches. I laid my head back, reaching my arms into the open air at my sides, trying to imprint this moment into my memory forever.

How? Why?
The words demanded attention, but I pushed them aside.

No wonder my grandmother was so fascinated with what she saw after building the great airships.
No wonder the Council destroyed them all afterwards.
No one would ever want to leave this place.

Xander reached up and squeezed my shoulder again, letting me know I should hold on. I looked down past the tips of my bobbing feet and saw that he was now descending into a small clearing beneath the trees.

“You’re putting us down?” I cried out to him, but I doubt he heard over the wind.

If I thought I could not breathe before, I definitely felt my heart stop now.

And here I had thought that perhaps we were going to be sneaking around the city tonight, meeting the likes of unsavory people . . . not
this
.

Never
this
.

The small trees and grasses nearest to us arched backwards from the gentle force of the jetpack’s dark blue flames. I reached the toe of my boot out in anticipation of hitting the ground below me, but the seat held me firmly in place.

Xander hit the ground first and he took a few running steps forward to steady us before he stopped. Just as he did, the stabilizers fell to the grass, supporting my weight. My legs dangled a mere five inches from the earth—my fingers fumbling to find the latch to release me from the seat.

“You sure you’re ready to touch down?” Xander asked, his fingers hovering over the release.

Without hesitation I nodded, then yelped in glee as the seat collapsed beneath me.

Xander caught me by my upper arms as my legs almost gave away. Not caring how unladylike I looked, I unhitched the harness connecting me to Xander hurriedly in my childlike anticipation. Once free, I ran to an area where the moonlight shone through the opening in the trees. I spread my arms out wide and spun, twirling myself into a dizzy delirium of happiness. Laughing, I lost my balance, and then deciding the ground was the safest place for me to be at the moment—I sat.

Crossing my legs with a hitching breath and smile, I looked back at Xander. He had not moved, only stood watching me. I was too euphoric to be embarrassed. In an effort to calm myself, I drew in the clean air through my nose so I could fully appreciate the lost world that was around me.

“I don’t know what to say.” I looked up at him again, my gaze intense and pure. “A simple ‘thank you’ does not seem enough for what you have done for me tonight.”

“You needn’t say anything. The look on your face is more than enough.”

My eyes broke away from him then as he began to unbuckle his harness and set aside the pack, laying it carefully to the ground. I skimmed the small grasses that surrounded me with the tips of my fingers, marveling at how their green stems followed my hand as if they longed for my touch.
I wonder if they react this way for everyone who has had the pleasure to walk the Outlands?

“Is this where you escaped to all those times you left the hanger?” I asked looking up, suddenly curious.

Xander, not noticing me playing with the grass, stood up from where he kneeled beside the jetpack and looked back at me. His face was brighter and more beautiful than I’d ever seen before. This place brought out a luminance in him just as it had done to me.

“This is where I grew up,” Xander said quickly and with so much frankness that I frowned, not understanding.

“You what?”

Xander smiled and walked over to me casually, offering a fingerless gloved hand to help me up from my knees. “Here, let me show you—rather than explain it.”

Xander steered me through the foreign forest, dense with its own enigma. I found myself carefully stepping over the roots and rocks that blocked our path, even over the trunks of the fallen trees. A pang of sadness sprouted its way into my chest at the sight. Without understanding how, I was suddenly comforted by a thought that seemed to whisper its way into my mind:
I should not mourn over their loss. The fallen continue their journey and contribute the nutrients of their own life so that the living can flourish . . . .