The Lost Mage (31 page)

“Oh, no you don’t. Lightning is the force of nature. Electricity is harnessed energy and you still think the TV works by magic.”

“I may have some difficulty grasping this electricity you speak of, but I stand by my belief that weapons are my area of expertise.”

“Look, I’m sorry sweetie, but you attract attention. Between your hair and your strange speech and … it’s just that I’d rather not attract attention when buying a stun gun, if you don’t mind.”

Darakin was a bit insulted, but didn’t want to appear petulant so he leaned back against the sofa. “I guess I don’t have a choice.”

“I won’t be long.” She dressed, gave him a kiss and left.

Darakin ate his breakfast, unhappy at being left at home. He’d thought that he had proven last night that he was a capable defender, but she didn’t want him to accompany her to buy a weapon. “
I’m
the one who has to fight the demon. Who does she think she is?” he said to Mrowley.

I think she thinks she’s Nora. Did she hit her head?

“No, why would you ask such a thing?”

Well, you seem to think that she doesn’t know who she is? I thought she was like Crystal, you know the girl in the magic box who lives in Hopelessville and has the new brain.

“No, she hasn’t had a head injury. And Nora says that none of that stuff in the soap opera is real. They can’t give someone else’s brain to a person.”

Then why do you want to know who she thinks she is? Isn’t she Nora? Oh, I get it! She’s possessed by the lizard, right? Or maybe by the demon?

Darakin sighed. “The lizard is the demon.”

Ah, so she’s possessed by the lizard demon?

“No, she’s not possessed.”

Then how come she doesn’t know who she is?

“She does. Forget I said anything.”

Okay. Is it Hopelessville time? I want to see how Crystal is doing.

“Sure.” Darakin turned on the television and the two of them sat back to watch while they waited for Nora to return.

When Nora came back, she found the two of them still on the couch watching TV. She was holding a bag and the morning paper. “There’s something you should see, Darakin.”

He looked up. “The stun gun? Yes, I’m anxious to see it.”

“We’ll get to that. But check this out first.” She turned a few pages of the newspaper and handed it to him so he could read the article she pointed to.

Second Lizard Man Sighting in a Week

Several people have reported spotting a lizard man riding a subway two nights ago. Police are investigating a possible link between those sightings and the attack last week of a man playing beloved child icon Charlie, the Chipmunk. The victim in that incident was hospitalized for several days before being released.

According to witnesses, the lizard man ran into an uptown subway station at approximately 3:15 am. He was again spotted running out of the station of the train’s next stop. He appeared to have been headed further uptown.

Anyone with information is asked to call the Crime Tip hotline.

“I’m just glad that nobody mentions us in the article,” Nora said.

“Do you think we were spotted?”

“I don’t know. I mean most people in the city are immune to crazy behavior, but that’s not something you see every day. But there’s no mention of us. I guess the witnesses were too distracted by the lizard man to even notice us.”

“It says he ran further uptown. What does that mean?”

“Probably toward that park.”

“I’ll have to scry again and see if I get a different picture this time.”

“Okay, but first, I want to show you the stun gun.”

Darakin leapt off the couch. He was very anxious to see this weapon that harnessed the power of lightning. She pulled it out of the bag and showed it to him.

He stared at the rather unimpressive-looking, small, rectangular device. “That’s it? That little thing calls lightning?”

“No, it doesn’t call lightning. It creates its own electricity. Stand back and I’ll show you.”

Nora stepped away from Darakin and Mrowley and set off the stun gun as she’d been shown. Darakin jumped as small electrical sparks were emitted from the device. “See? Lightning … sort of.”

Mrowley let out a shriek and ran under the couch.
Make it stop!

“Sorry, Mrowley,” Nora called to the cat.

Darakin’s eyes were wide with wonder. “Wow. I didn’t know what to imagine. How do they do that?”

“I don’t know the inner workings of it, Darakin. Just accept that it works and let’s move on. Tell Mrowley not to come near this, okay?”

Not a problem,
came the muffled cry from under the couch.

Darakin laughed. “I don’t think you have to worry about that. Mrowley will leave it alone.”

Nora then spent some time showing Darakin how to use the stun gun after making sure that Mrowley was nowhere near them.

When they were done with the lesson, she asked, “Now, how do we find the demon again? I doubt he’ll go back to the Galaxy.”

“You’re probably right. But the scrying spell should help us find him.”

Darakin went to the kitchen and pulled out the supplies for scrying, including the jar that contained the rest of the krekdapop slime.

“Ugh, you stored that in the kitchen?” Nora came in behind him.

“I didn’t know where else to put it that it wouldn’t come to any harm.” The couple turned to look at Mrowley who was standing on the floor between them, blinking innocently.

What?

“Well, I think the bathroom cabinet is a better choice than the kitchen, okay?”

“Fine. I’ll put whatever’s left in the bathroom.”

“Thank you.”

Darakin went to the shelf in the living room on which he’d left the incense. It was gone. “Nora? Did you move the incense sticks that I put here?”

“No. Are you sure you left them there? Maybe you put them somewhere else.”

“No, I’m positive I put them here, up a few shelves so Mrowley couldn’t reach them.” He looked at the cat who was sitting on the couch.

“Mrowley?” Darakin said in a threatening voice. “Did you take my incense?”

Why are you always blaming me? I don’t even know what that is.

“Those sticks that I used the last time I did the scrying spell. Remember they smoke and let off the scent of …”

“Tell him they make the weird smells. Remember? That’s how he described the scents from Ravenwynd’s shop.”

“Right. Yes, Mrowley, the sticks that gave off the weird smell.”

Nope. Sorry, haven’t seen them.

“This is impossible. He can’t remember that he ate an hour ago. How’s he going to remember what he did with the incense?”

Did you say eat? Is it time to eat? I haven’t eaten in –

“Yeah, I get it, cat. No, it’s not time to eat. Do you remember jumping up to this shelf at all?”

Hm. Maybe? I think there were some light bugs up there the other day.

“Okay, and when you were chasing the light bugs, did you see any sticks up here?”

Um. Oh wait! I did see some sticks. They were taunting me, but they tasted all wrong so I got rid of them.

Darakin couldn’t keep from raising his voice. “Got rid of them? What does that mean? How does a cat with no thumbs ‘get rid’ of incense?”

I introduced them to the Shredders.

“The shredders?”

Yep.
Mrowley held up a paw with claws extended for effect.
And these,
he opened his mouth in a lazy yawn to display his teeth.

Darakin sighed and looked at Nora. “I think we’re going to need to go back to Ravenwynd’s shop for more incense. He seems to think he destroyed them.”

“Humph. You’d think we’d have found some traces of them around the place. Well, we’ll have to do that tomorrow then.”

“Fine.” Darakin turned to Mrowley. “I’m not talking to you.”

Sure you are. You just did. Dude, are you all right?

Darakin let out a sigh of frustration and ate the lunch that Nora had prepared. When they had eaten, they headed to the bar. She took a different route than usual.

“Why are we going this way?” Darakin asked.

“Because I don’t want to pass by the scene of the crime, as it were.”

“Scene of the crime? Nora, we didn’t do anything wrong. We were attacked and we defended ourselves.”

“I told you, that’s not the problem. The problem is that we’re not here legally, and even though we didn’t do anything wrong last night, they would still call the INS on us.”

Darakin shivered at the mention of the INS. “Yes, the powerful wizards that could make me fly.”

“Darakin, you do know that I meant in an airplane, right?”

“I don’t know what an airplane is.” As the words left his mouth, he realized how similar his part of the conversation was to Mrowley’s when he was talking to the cat. He made a vow to be more patient with the cat and more understanding of Nora’s frustration.

“Ach, all that talk about how we have astronauts traveling through outer space the other day and it didn’t occur to you to ask me about flying through the blue skies?”

“I didn’t think about it.”

“An airplane is, well, I guess you’d call it a mechanical bird. They fly through the skies very quickly and the bigger ones can carry hundreds of passengers.”

“I don’t like the idea of it. Man wasn’t meant to fly.”